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About nightrider1435

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  • Birthday 10/02/1995

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    Dallas, Texas
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  1. I feel you on this, it'd be nice to let go of old patterns like flipping off a light switch. Development is just going to take time, we can't rewire our minds overnight. I'd just try to be more patient with yourself. Also try to mediate right after a run, take a cold shower too. This combo works really great for me.
  2. Yes, and it's like my mind wants to hold it, but it can't, like sand falling through your fingers. You think you have it only for it to fall through again. The mind can't grasp this, because you are it, are being it, and have always been it, and it contains you, the person in the experience. So simple that its actually pretty hilarious, which is why I think once one has a realization it's common just to sit there laughing your ass off.
  3. I would agree with this, depending on you some people should stay clear from Kratom. The stuff is cheap, it is plant based, legal in most places, easily accessible locally or online, it can make you feel great but also easily turn into a daily habit, become a crutch. The quitkratom sub on reddit is filled with horror stories of people who clearly abuse this stuff, I'm talking 20gs and up a day for months or years, which is insane. I wouldn't want to imagine the withdrawals from that much use. From my experience, reds are more euphoric and sedating. Whites and greens give me more stimulation and energy. I've also heard that the strains are just one big myth primarily use for marketing, its basically all the same, there is no difference. I'm not sure whether that is true or not though. Anywhere from 2-3 grams is a good moderate dose. A 5 gram dose will have me feeling really good, and even then I find it doesn't really effect my productivity at all.
  4. Haven't tried it but I am planning to at some point. For anyone else interested you can use this link to help find a practitioner in your area.
  5. If one killed their mind it could make the situation a whole lot worse, IMO. Awareness doesn't go away, there's no telling where you would end up next if you killed yourself. There is no easy way out, and I'm sure there would be consequences for killing your mind.
  6. I'm interested to hear some opinions about Kratom on here. I went and picked some up at a local head shop today since it's legal where I live. I bought a strain called "Malaysian Red Vien" and started out with a 3g dose. Within 20 minutes I began to notice some mild euphoria, overall just felt more relaxed and peaceful. I had a great mediation session after taking it. This could be a good tool for consciousness work but like psychedelic's it deserves your respect. From what I've been finding out the withdrawals can be bad if abused, so you wouldn't want to be taking it everyday.
  7. @Enlightenment I would get that afterglow too, I'd wake up the next day just feeling more pure. You might just have to wait another year or two before you can experience the magic of it again. I've done it about 5 times in the years 2016 & 2017, haven't messed with it since.
  8. @Enlightenment 15 times in what span of time? I wouldn't recommend taking MDMA more than once or twice a year.
  9. Yeah MDMA is amazing and I'll never forget what that was like either. It introduced unconditional love to me. IMO, everyone should try it at least once in their lifetime.
  10. @Highest I loved how you described this, perfect.
  11. You'd be surprised that no one really cares. It is fine man, seriously, don't sweat it. Most of us have been there before.
  12. @REALNEGA Have a mystical experience, something mind shattering, that would probably be one of the best if not the only way to spark a real desire for truth.
  13. It's up to you whether or not you keep up with spiritual practices. You need your ego to live in this life so I'm not sure what you mean with this question. Your identity to the ego gets dropped, that's what will die.
  14. @Anton Rogachevski We see these bodies and not this unconditional love. It takes effort on the minds part to align with this, we become so hardwired against it.
  15. I wouldn't be so fixated on trying to find some solution when I'm sure you are fine. This is all fear based monkey mind gibberish. Don't do anything to drastic while in this confused state. Give yourself some time to recalibrate.