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About nightrider1435

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  • Birthday 10/02/1995

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    Dallas, Texas
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  1. For me not much has changed, other than I have a better understanding of what reality is. Life just carries on, it doesn’t care whether you’re god realized or not. All it took was one mushroom trip and the realization has stuck with me since, and you also realize there is no beginning or end. What did I do first as god? Well I was always god, I was just aware of it. I got up the next morning and just went to work like an average human being.
  2. I feel you on this, for me this comes and goes. No your're not bullshitting yourself, just enjoy it when it happens. So next time this happens just be mindful of the ego mind, you might feel this way because it's unfamiliar and the mind might perceive it as threatening.
  3. You reach a point where you really don’t care anymore. Let the mind throw it’s tantrum then go back to work... lol.
  4. I’m at a point where I’m seeing how challenging this can really be. My ego mind is really starting to hate this work in the last year or so. I’ve had some pretty severe ego backlashes after awakenings. I have a pretty big drive for truth so I just keep going though, sometimes fast or sometimes slow.
  5. I took a LSD trip right before all the panic buying and shutdowns here in the United States. I was feeling a "everything is going to be ok" vibe and that this is temporary and will pass just like anything else, we will get through this. Its the beginning of the end for the old world. I agree with with @Nemo28 , a new world is being birthed, the old one has to die first though. There's a bigger picture going on here.
  6. @Erixoon50 That would be more wise in my opinion. Also make sure your well rested before you start the trip.
  7. Once you're in the trip you won't want any confrontation with your parents at all, it could very easily derail you into panic. You also might get tired of being confined to your room during the trip, also your going to be up all night too. Two grams is a good starting dose but given your circumstances, I would suggest to start even lower, just to see how you react.
  8. No you can't reverse this, you're in it now. Don't panic though, the mind will exaggerate things. Don't do anymore rasa sessions until your stable again. Just take it easy and be kind to yourself.
  9. I smoked during a mushroom trip and had a identical experience to what you just described. One of the most unpleasant things I have experienced so far, it took about 12 weeks for my body and mind to recover from that.
  10. I practice vipassana mediation, concentration of the breathe. You could be seeing your third eye or crown chakra. No one knows where any of this is going but like you said, faith.
  11. @Vency I'm still not sure what it could mean, I still experience this during my mediation practice. My dark night of the soul was peaking when I posted this. I have been treading some of the darkest deepest pits that words can't even describe. Overall from what I can notice is that my life is improving as the years go by, slowing moving from the darkness into the light.
  12. @ShugendoRa I wouldn’t recommend taking teaspoons because you won’t know exactly how much you’re taking. Get a gram scale so you can measure your dosages. I’ve never used capsules but I think two is around one gram. If you’re going to take it daily, it’s best to keep it around 10 grams a day, no more than 3 doses in a day. Take tolerance breaks, drink plenty of water because Kratom dehydrates you. It can make you constipated, magnesium citrate can help with that.
  13. Your're not going to have withdrawals from only 4g a day. Its when you get anywhere from 10 to 20 grams a day is when you'll get withdrawals if you abruptly stop.
  14. You probably haven’t dipped below the surface level yet, and you might not like what you find down there.
  15. I’m just saying, you’re probably not aware to the degree of how much you are suffering in this very moment. Again I’m warning you, be careful.