Tristan12

@RickyFitts Oh lol that's funny

I can totally relate I'm in a pretty similar situation myself. For me i've just made the choice to put up with living at home and just working as much as I can to build a career until I can support myself financially. For me its just a better option than having to slave away at some mindless job to be able to barely cover living expenses, and not having much time to work on my passions. I've manage to sort of distance myself from my family to the extent where I barely talk to them and I just isolate myself as much as I can, and they don't bother me so much now. I still can't wait to move out though. I don't really know what to tell you, this is just genuinely a shitty situation to be in. Hopefully you end up getting a job you like, but if not I guess you'll just have to decide if you want to settle with a job you don't like for a while to be able to live alone, or if you want to live with your parents. You could try to look for some alternative way out like maybe living with friends to lower living expenses, or maybe you could really put your mind to it and come up with some way to land a job that you really like and is perfect for you, but if not then I feel like you'll just have to bite the bullet of a difficult situation and make the most of it, whatever you end up doing. I'm sure long term it will work out, if you're worried about money still being an issue for you later in life, then that's something you can work towards and set goals for, just like any other area of personal development. Start learning about finance and investing and figure out what you can do to make more money for yourself if a job won't be enough for you.

Minecraft and GTA 5. I love open-ended games where I can do whatever I want and be creative. I love Minecraft especially, the creative potential in that game is insane, and its just ridiculously fun.

@Leo Gura Thank you

@The0Self Interesting

You will immediately know that awakening is more accurate. It's just like waking up from sleep. I remember the times that I've awoken to reality being a dream, it has felt so convincing and like how could I ever doubt this, of course its a dream, but then I wonder, how do I know that my perceptions are accurate and truthful, what if I am deluded or just imagining something? Even though the awakenings I've had feel completely true and undeniable, like waking up from sleeping like you said, I still have this lingering thought in the back of my mind of how do I know my perceptions are accurate.

I still have a hard time understanding that if I normally perceive my reality as being real and physical, and it doesn't feel like a dream, but then I become conscious that reality is a dream, how do I know which is more accurate? All states of consciousness are Absolute Truth, but you still describe reality as being a dream and as not being physical, so if I can be in states of consciousness that perceive both, how do I know which is more accurate?

So are you saying that once you awaken deep enough, there will be absolutely no doubt or uncertainty, and so you can be sure that reality isn't what you normally see it to be in a regular state of consciousness?

INFJ

@The0Self How do you know that when you have an awakening, what you realize is more true than what you perceive in your regular sober state of consciousness? I was thinking and I guess if I perceived my reality to be real and physical, that would be a thought, and even though things seem real, there is nothing in my direct experience that actually proves that reality is physically real and not a dream, and so without any thoughts, in a regular sober state, reality just feels like a question mark, like I don't really know what I'm looking at. Because of that there's no contradiction if I suddenly become conscious that reality is a dream. I still feel sort of uncertain about this, in the sense that what if I am deluded, or if i only see reality as a question mark because my consciousness is already raised and maybe a materialist wouldn't, but I guess if I remember that direct experience is absolute, and it's just thoughts that delude me, then whatever I perceive in my direct experience is what's true, and if I don't know what it is while in a sober state, then that's just what it is right now. Do you have anything to add?

I was watching the video Leo posted on his blog from this same channel about Egyptian spirituality. I found this video in the recommended section, and I wanted to share it here as it was really beautiful. "The basis of creation is Love. God loves his creation, and when his creation passionately loves him back, the purpose of creation is fulfilled."

I’ve heard of a place called Arkana from a couple youtubers who made some videos of retreats there and it seems like a really great place. I’ve never done aya but once I eventually do I plan on going there. You should research it

You may have issues around grief or other emotions from earlier traumas that make it difficult for you to access these emotions now, so you would probably want to find and address those, but for now, treat emotional numbness as its own emotion. If you think about your grandfather's death and you can't get yourself to grieve, just let yourself feel how you feel, even if you don't really feel anything, and just sit with that and let yourself feel that way. Numbness is often a cover emotion for overly strong or difficult emotions. A cover emotion is an emotion sitting on top of another emotion to try and protect you from a more painful emotional state. If you just sit with it, honour it for what it is (trying to protect you from a painful emotional state) and let yourself feel it, you will often drop into the emotion beneath it. I recommend just sitting with your numbness and letting yourself feel that, and it may help you start to feel again. It's important that you don't just try to push your way through the numbness and instead you honour and respect it for what it is, since its trying to help you, so go into it with that mindset.