kag101

1. Self-Expression 2. Deliberate Imperfection 3. Agility 4. Eclecticism 5. Essencialism 6. Life Purpose 7. Cooperation 8. Self-Confidence 9. Authenticity 10. Vitality what are yours? Feel free to ask me to talk more about a certain value of mine Looking forward to hearing your values

Even having no experience? why not?

I’d say: Participate in life even if you feel insecure What would yours be?

One that really stuck with me was about living all parts of myself, even the unwanted parts (lazy, childish, angry, etc)

“A drop in the ocean, you are not. The entire ocean in a drop, you are.” — Rumi

So, for this week, I want to experiment with using this technique more closely. One thing I struggle in life is having a sense of direction, a sense of knowing what to do. So this technique is helpful because when I repeat those affirmations/commands, I end up having a guide to decide what and how I’m going to do. Basically, whenever I feel a sense of “directionessless”, I will apply this technique. Sure, it can get neurotic. I might end up, hating doing it because I might feel a sense of artificiality. But who cares? I’m just gonna test it. Even if I notice that he’s not doing me very good, I’ll insist a little bit. Also, even if I decide that my intention is to not have any intention, I’ll set it up consciously. let’s see how it goes 🙌

“Hatred never ceases by hatred, but my love alone is healed.” — the Buddha

Turn out this whole behavior activation thing backfired. I’m very anal about stuff so when I choose a strategy or a Motto for my life, I have a hard time being flexible. To counter that, one affirmation that I’ve been experimenting is “do nothing”. You know, being lazy is widely considered one of the worst traits one can have. But oftentimes it is a necessary defense against toxic productivity. So doing nothing can actually be quite healing, because it removes all the unnecessary stress. Of course, it can have its own side effects, such as slacking off way too much. But overall, it can be a way to recover your natural self. That doesn’t mean that I’ll just vegetate on bed all day. But instead, knowing that some things that I will do require some willpower to initiate, but that I will let go of the constant excessive control of my own self. Let’s see how that goes!

It’s all about getting fed up with wearing a mask.

Just to give you guys some more view: I struggle with depression. And over the past year or so my mood has fluctuated a lot. I either barely wanna get out of bed or I feel like in the top of the world. That does raise the question if I’m bipolar. Anyway, one thing that I’ve decided to take more seriously is physical activity, especially swimming. I think it’s done wonders for my mood and I should make it a priority. It’s no use doing some Affirmations in my couch if I’m not taking more concrete movements in fact, one of my affirmations is behavioral activation. I really like this concept because it takes that. No you don’t feel like doing it, but you are gonna do it — even if it’s imperfectly or half assed — as a way to challenge your depression. Depression makes me feel like I’m incapable, and that my body will collapse if I forced it a little bit. So I’d rather push it a little more on the action side then on the self compassionate one. That is to say, it’s OK if I overdo it.

There’s a technique that I developed: I repeat an action-oriented affirmation for 20 times. This helps guide my behavior. For more detail, here’s the topic: So basically, I want to try it out in a more systematic way for the next 50 days or so. Until August 1st. Whenever I feel out of ground, I will do this technique. Here, I will share if I’m becoming neurotic with that, which affirmations have been working the most, etc. I’m looking forward to seeing my results. It’s something that I truly believe has had a positive impact on my life. That being said, maybe my ultimate intention is to not have any specific intention at all lol.

haha, that's pretty nice i don't do it for every single activity though — that'd be quite neurotic lol

Wow, that’s a powerful dream my takeaway: the devil feeds itself from fear

The logical mind says that, but reality is much more mindfuckery than that. When you fully accept your destructive tendencies (your devilry as you put it) — you actually go full circle and become a saint.

if only it was that simple...