withinUverse

Wow! as a newbie... What the hell did I just walk into? (Actualized Forum)

60 posts in this topic

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You should distinguish between a serious body of work vs random online conservations.

There's, ultimately, no separation.


The Secret of this Universe is You.

my music

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@withinUverse I can't add anything that other people haven't already said, but damn that is some cool art.

Edited by Carl-Richard

Intrinsic joy is revealed in the marriage of meaning and being.

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10 hours ago, withinUverse said:

@Juan Ok I think I figured it out.  I like that you like to record your process.  I like to do that at times as well.  Here's a mural I did last year in Peru (Restaurant Mural).  I'm hoping to get back by the end of this year or early next year to do another layer on top of it.  And then here's a few drawings I call Shamanic Yantras (Shamanic Yantras).  And then these were two pieces I did right before my first Aya ceremonies.  

14938227_360314120975752_351829430083602  14604846_360327457641085_936335474579200

 

Awesome! Saw the ones on instagram, I was gonna said it has a very ayahuasca vision type of art and you already did ceremonies, lovely! Same here ahó! 

Yea recording the process is fun, extra work for me hehe, but fun. 

10 hours ago, withinUverse said:

I’m hoping to get back by the end of this year or early next year to do another layer on top of it.

Why you have to wait that long?

Edited by Juan

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@NoSelfSelf

9 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Your mind is playing tricks on you to focus on others,to try to fit into the forum,focusing on drama..

Hello there... I have a working understanding my mind can play tricks on me.  In fact, I understand I like playing and challenges.  Since I seem to perceive others to play with, then my curiosity seems to want to meet characters and learning to enjoy the interactions.  I've gained so much understanding from others... mostly clarifying to myself how I don't want to be.  But also, they're a gold mind on what I need to focus my personal work on... when I get triggered by others... I can start processing why am I so emotionally attached? 

Try to fit into the Forum... I guess I'd like to clarify myself... I'm not really wondering if I can fit into the Forum.  I'm wondering if the Forum fits with me.  Well again I find myself in a collective setting and I have many areas of interest in this life, and I thought maybe since I have gained so much value through Actualized that there could be others, I can socialize with whom might understand me a little better because they may know what the work involves, consciousness.  I've found it challenging at times to have deeper conversations with others who seem to be in my physical presence.  I figured I'd try the virtual world too.  I'm not opposed to trying new things to see if I find value, and I'm not opposed to disregarding after giving it a good go at it.  Regardless I'm going to learn more about myself and gain more clarification.  

10 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Everybody is for themselves because at the end of the day,you can only see whats best for you, put a break on stuff ,see what information will be useful.

If you keep focusing on others then this work wont work.

Selfishness is demonized but necessary to reach your potential.

This is some good stuff here... I find my own way of saying this to people I run into as well.  I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to make a suggestion:  don't assume someone doesn't know or better yet live consciousness work, especially if they're drawn to this Forum.  You say If you keep focusing on others then this work wont work.  How's your work going for you?  This may be true for you, but in my experience, I've been able to find my work involves others and myself.  No matter how open I am to the possibility I am the only conscious being in my reality; I get confirmations that there are other conscious beings too.  I've already mentioned some benefits of interacting with others above.  

I thought possibly it wouldn't be fair to ask you how your work is going without letting you know how my work is going for myself.  Another member had asked what's the "real work" and it's good to see if we're on the same page or not.  This is how I responded: 

14 hours ago, withinUverse said:

Real work has actually changed for me quite recently.  First, my personal real work was to experience Awakening or Enlightenment... I thought it might take almost my entire lifetime to achieve that.  I was wrong... it took me five years of dedicated focused work.  Technically I've always been doing the work but I wasn't conscious of it, but once I was... it didn't take me long.  

After my Awakening I've been taking a long time to be comfortable with my transformation.  Now I see the real work for me is to help the collective to Awaken and also to follow what guidance I've been receiving with my new sensitivites to continue to create and master this experience I'm involved in.

With you, I'll give more details if you're open to it.  I've found Ayahuasca as the tool to my Awakening.  I love the whole... go to the jungle, ceremony thing.   I mentioned pre-Awakening I was consciously working towards Enlightenment for five years.  The first year was when I found Actualized videos.  I was doing his homework and working them through.  I purchased the Life Purpose course and gained so much value from clarification.  The second year I found myself in the jungle and that's when everything amplified.  It was a dramatic direct experience that inspired me to really get down and dirty.  I was humbled so much... I didn't know a damn thing.  I pretty much wiped my story I was telling myself clean.  That actually includes the life purpose I was trying to narrow down in the course to why the fuck am I limiting myself.  I moved to a secluded mountain town (technically it's called a village it's so small) next to the Rockies.  I completely removed my body from social distractions I had created for thirty-some years in my home state.  Fast forward to my Awakening circumstances.  I created my surroundings to have ample time to focus on my spirituality.  I went to Peru to attend my first shamanic dieta training which was going to be three months long, but I also didn't have a ticket to leave.  I wanted time to allow myself to continue to explore Peru more if I wished afterwards.  During my three months is when I went through my deaths to Awaken.  There's so much that I can try to explain with language, but how I can plainly state it is: I transformed from being a human into being Universal and human.  I was open to see if I was going to return to this Reality.  I really didn't know and at times I didn't think I was going to return... but I'm back and I know that I'm Universal as well now, I want to help manifest the Reality around me not just myself which also includes others (without exclusion of animals, insects, plants, waterbodies, air quality, earth, etc.)  

I stayed in Peru for five more months exploring and meeting some locals and other travelers.  In these months, I gained more awareness that I'm not giving myself solo time.  I wasn't really respecting the transformation I experienced.  I was riding the High, but not noticing the energetic depletion.  Part of my old story was still lingering and so I thought I could return to the States and go back to work.  I found out quickly that I was really sensitive to other energies.  I found I was getting triggered what seemed like more easily than ever before.  I knew I needed time to ground myself and I didn't know where to go.  I thought maybe I needed to find an ashram or something.  But I found myself returning back to my hometown after leaving 20 years.  My dad still lives there, and I found my sanctuary with him.  I am realizing that it's time to clean my slate again, but not as completely as I did before.  For two months I rarely left my bedroom or studio.  It was amazing!  The last four months I've been slowly getting myself out and about.  I've been checking with myself and cognizant of my emotional state whether to take on more or not.  I'm an ambivert leaning towards introversion according to my personality tests.   So I find it easier to be in my mind, but I'm starting to get restless because I've got a social side which has been neglected recently.  I continue to deepen my understanding of the importance of balance and the work is to be more conscious until it just is.  

And now I'm here in the Forum.  I want to direct my energies towards others who know the work includes raising awareness.   I'll continue to develop my relationships who aren't as conscious; I'm not giving up on them.  I just realize I have limited energy to share right now.  But I'm feeling more and more comfortable to release my energy again now that I gave myself time.

11 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

This is not a cult where leader must be worshipped,pedestalized and if you get into our secret club your life will be amazing its a deception..

I've listened to the videos relating to cult and cult psychology.  I have not had a direct experience with a cult... so I'm blind whether they exist or not, but I'm open to their existence.  By no means do I consider Actualized as a cult... transparency has been apparent to me from the beginning.  I promote Actualized so it's not as secretive.  There's been so much work done by Leo with such diverse topics, it's easy for me to recommend them to people who frankly I don't have the time or energy to walk through the importance of conscious work.  Maybe they can get their own inspiration from the videos like I did, but maybe not... I'm not sure.  My work has made me extremely confident in my intelligence, my abilities, and my drive to create.  It continues to deepen and so yes there's a part of me that can admit that I have a little star-struck quality in me towards Leo.  I'm sure I wasn't the only one.  But that doesn't matter of course, but the few days I've been on this Forum helped recontextualized my illusions I was constructing towards Leo.  Again, I want to learn so I know it's not just Leo I have this tendency towards... I know there are others on my list and maybe this is something I created to help me work through that.  

I'll let you know I've got direction in my ceremonies which has been different then the past.  Usually, it was very personal and that was easier for me.  Now it involves working with others and traveling to locations I seem to have not experienced yet (possibly) and doing activities I haven't remembered training in.   I love a challenge and it's taken me to ground my confidence to move forward.  So, I'm feeling out different activities to see where they go to ultimately to create more opportunities of happiness to share with others.  I'm happy and I want others to be as well.  I'm giving the Forum a try; it's been beneficial for me already.  Thank you for commenting on my post with your opinions.  I'm learning how to communicate better with others, so you've been giving me that chance to develop it more.  Maybe you can find me as a source to learn too.  

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@StarStruck

11 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I made this meme but I didn't make the art work.

Hello there... I love the collaboration :) 

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@vibv

6 hours ago, vibv said:
15 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You should distinguish between a serious body of work vs random online conservations.

There's, ultimately, no separation.

Thank you!  This statement wasn't sitting with me well.  I wanted to address this too.  This Forum should not be separate from the serious body of work.  The videos are the theory and the Forum can be a source of application or... more theory.  I'm not sure, but I'd think if you're involved with Actualized then we have a better working understanding that there's work to be done, so why can't we try to incorporate encouraging work in a Forum setting too?  When it comes to the videos you don't really get the opportunity to focus your attention.  When you actually have a group that's interested in engagement then work with it.  

I've found that it's a challenge to see who I am at times.  I encourage my friends who care about me and know I want to grow to be honest with their opinions about me (constructive criticism).  They are my teachers... I see everyone as a potential teacher.  It's not like I have to agree with everything they say but, I can find the grain of truth I need to work on that was in my blind spot.    

I know Actualized is innovative... I was interested to see how the innovation continues through all platforms.  I'm not saying this Forum isn't a good resource for others, but is there opportunities to give it more potential then where it is now?  I don't know... I just wanted to hear what others thought.  What about you?  You've been a member with 136 posts.  So maybe I can assume you're relatively new here.  What's your impression?  I do have to admit I can be too serious at times so I can also admit that maybe I'm trying to fix something that's not actually broken.  I just didn't give it enough time.  

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@Juan

4 hours ago, Juan said:

Awesome! Saw the ones on instagram, I was gonna said it has a very ayahuasca vision type of art and you already did ceremonies, lovely! Same here ahó! 

Yeeesss!  I'm an Aya girl through and through!  I'm not certain forever, but for a while still.  I've found myself mostly with Shipibos along the Ucayali river.  How about yourself?  

4 hours ago, Juan said:

Yea recording the process is fun, extra work for me hehe, but fun. 

Exactly! The extra work during the process is fun!  I love recording the process when I remember to.  It helps remind myself that life is loving the process not the final completion.  There's not an end I'm working towards... enjoying and appreciating the process :) 

4 hours ago, Juan said:

Why you have to wait that long?

Well, I have to save up some funds to get me there.  Also, I'm not in a rush to get back.  Goes back to the process thing... I like to see where I'm led.  I know I'll return I'm just not sure when.  I've been getting more ideas I want to put on the mural.  When I was there, I was finding myself just trying to get it done lol... not use to such a large format.  I want to allow plenty of time to continue.  I also found a gentleman who writes children's poetry who wants me to do a mural for him.  So murals, more dieta, and more exploration... I've got to make the time for it but I'm making time to just chill right now.  I did 20 ceremonies in 8 months last time.

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31 minutes ago, withinUverse said:

@vibv

I know Actualized is innovative... I was interested to see how the innovation continues through all platforms.  I'm not saying this Forum isn't a good resource for others, but is there opportunities to give it more potential then where it is now?  I don't know... I just wanted to hear what others thought.  What about you?  You've been a member with 136 posts.  So maybe I can assume you're relatively new here.  What's your impression?  I do have to admit I can be too serious at times so I can also admit that maybe I'm trying to fix something that's not actually broken.  I just didn't give it enough time.  

I'm not that new, but I don't post that often ;)

I follow Leo for a while now and see many parallels to my own journey. I regularly gain a lot of great impulses especially from the YouTube videos that further me a lot on my own path.

This forum is an awesome source of entertainment and some insight, but I feel that you can get lost in it, too, if you aren't careful. That's why I'm not too attached to this place. But I appreciate it for what it is.

Edited by vibv

The Secret of this Universe is You.

my music

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22 hours ago, withinUverse said:

The Forum community:  Have you ever been so absorbed in something that you don't even notice how dysfunctional it's getting until an outsider points out the dysfunction?  What's this Forum for?  Where are we on our development when we are dealing with relationships?  Are we working on changing our behaviors to be healthier?  Have you actually been doing the work... honestly?  When you are writing your comments, how are you feeling?  You can ask yourself if your comments are constructive or not.  You can disagree with others, that's natural.  But can you work on responding in a respectful way?

We had this discussion lately. There are a lot of problems here. I (and maybe some other people) came to the conclusion that it's best to lead by good example than to point out bad things. Basically what you proposed.. working on ourselves. More consciousness.

22 hours ago, withinUverse said:

I want to see Actualizers differently from the herd, but how different are we really?   

Do you mean different from normal society? For sure. Way better in many ways, but also many more unstable people in relative numbers. More extreme basically.  Different (read better) from other Communities, who specialize on this Actualization? Depends on the Community.

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17 hours ago, withinUverse said:

 

Real work has actually changed for me quite recently.  First, my personal real work was to experience Awakening or Enlightenment... I thought it might take almost my entire lifetime to achieve that.  I was wrong... it took me five years of dedicated focused work.  Technically I've always been doing the work but I wasn't conscious of it, but once I was... it didn't take me long.  

After my Awakening I've been taking a long time to be comfortable with my transformation.  Now I see the real work for me is to help the collective to Awaken and also to follow what guidance I've been receiving with my new sensitivites to continue to create and master this experience I'm involved in.

How about you?  

Real work, for me, is having the courage to question everything I believe is true. Of course not just in theory, but also deriving the answers from my own direct experience. It’s extremely challenging, especially since I mental illnesses and I’m neurodiverse. However, these days I look at these conditions as an opportunity to learn more about myself; not just as an obstacle. 

17 hours ago, withinUverse said:

 

Real life... when I'm talking casually with other humas, I refer to this shared experience that we seem to feel is the physical waking world.  I was open to see where I ended up during and after my Awakening, and I returned back here in real life.  For some reason I share this real life with others and I'm going to continue my real work in this real life.  If you enjoy the work... it nevers stops.

How about you? 

Real life… that’s something I’m still contemplating about. I think that idea is relative. What I see as real, you may not, and vice-versa. 

As I mentioned before, I’m neurodiverse. It took a long time for me to embrace that. For a long time, I tried to fit in with everyone else. I realize that that doesn’t work for me.

Does that make my experience less real?


"Wisdom is not in knowing all the answers, but in seeking the right questions." -Gemini AI

 

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@vibv

7 hours ago, vibv said:

I'm not that new, but I don't post that often ;)

I follow Leo for a while now and see many parallels to my own journey. I regularly gain a lot of great impulses especially from the YouTube videos that further me a lot on my own path.

This forum is an awesome source of entertainment and some insight, but I feel that you can get lost in it, too, if you aren't careful. That's why I'm not too attached to this place. But I appreciate it for what it is.

ok... nice!  I'm quite aware of that as well... I'll be careful, thanks!

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8 hours ago, withinUverse said:

How about yourself?  

I had done it here on Puerto Rico which is where I’m from and Florida. 

8 hours ago, withinUverse said:

Well, I have to save up some funds to get me there.  Also, I'm not in a rush to get back.  Goes back to the process thing... I like to see where I'm led.  I know I'll return I'm just not sure when.  I've been getting more ideas I want to put on the mural.  When I was there, I was finding myself just trying to get it done lol... not use to such a large format.  I want to allow plenty of time to continue.  I also found a gentleman who writes children's poetry who wants me to do a mural for him.  So murals, more dieta, and more exploration... I've got to make the time for it but I'm making time to just chill right now.  I did 20 ceremonies in 8 months last time.

Understandable, and damn that is quite of some ceremonies! Lol yeah you’ve done more than me, im at least around the dozen.  

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@supremeyingyang

7 hours ago, supremeyingyang said:

We had this discussion lately. There are a lot of problems here. I (and maybe some other people) came to the conclusion that it's best to lead by good example than to point out bad things. Basically what you proposed.. working on ourselves. More consciousness.

Lead by good example... preciously :) Nice!  

 

7 hours ago, supremeyingyang said:

Do you mean different from normal society? For sure. Way better in many ways, but also many more unstable people in relative numbers. More extreme basically.  Different (read better) from other Communities, who specialize on this Actualization? Depends on the Community

I was meaning raising consciousness work in ourselves and others.  There's a part of normal society moving in this direction already.  In my experience there's a larger amount of people moving towards the Green stage collectively, which is hopeful.  I'm working with some indigenous who are starting into the Orange, and I'm hoping to influence the few I'm with about some concerns with materialism.  Differently from other communities, because I assumed we might understand the importance of direct experiences over theoretical debates, comparatively speaking.  Most people I speak with don't know that theory doesn't equal understanding.  I was fantasizing about radically open-minded Actualizers who learned acceptance and respect for others.  

I'm already seeing some benefits I can gain.  There's a lot I'm working on, and I can see this Forum as a good way to continue my work.  That's what I love about it all... what you think is the proper setup isn't what you find... but what you find is what you need at the moment :)  

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@Yimpa

8 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Real work, for me, is having the courage to question everything I believe is true. Of course not just in theory, but also deriving the answers from my own direct experience. It’s extremely challenging, especially since I mental illnesses and I’m neurodiverse. However, these days I look at these conditions as an opportunity to learn more about myself; not just as an obstacle.

That's great!  I wish I could say I understand where you're coming from, using my direct experience, but I cannot at least in a professional diagnosis sense.  But the closest I can get is when I listened to the video of "Understanding Neurosis", there were many qualities I had to work in myself.  But I know you're on the right track when you see yourself as an opportunity, not as an obstacle.  In a crazy way, I see this Reality as if we chose to live this life.  If I was in your shoes... I would remind myself that I have a unique opportunity to discover my capacity to face challenges that I've placed for myself to overcome.  I know with my intelligence, creativity, determination and courage I can find solutions to anything.  I don't know if you've gained this understanding, but your words you repeat to yourself is crucial.  You are always listening to your thoughts and speech.  You are literally convincing yourself the experience you want to create.  Continue to work on limiting beliefs along with beliefs in general.  You're already in this Forum, and in my mind... you're farther along in the work than most.  You're already doing it :) 

9 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Real life… that’s something I’m still contemplating about. I think that idea is relative. What I see as real, you may not, and vice-versa. 

Honestly, I agree with you.  When I was answering your question earlier, I was thankful that you wanted clarification.  Because existentially I'm still gaining more of an understanding of what Real Life means to me as well.  My understanding continues to deepen in many if not all aspects of my experience.  When I read the comment that said Real life I interpreted as the physical world we seem to live in together.  

9 hours ago, Yimpa said:

As I mentioned before, I’m neurodiverse. It took a long time for me to embrace that. For a long time, I tried to fit in with everyone else. I realize that that doesn’t work for me.

Does that make my experience less real?

I'm not familiar with neurodiverse.  I briefly saw it was similar to autism, is that right?  I'm assuming there's variations within neurodiverse.  When I hear you say what I see as real, you may not, and vice-versa are you talking existentially?  Or what's commonly known as physical, waking world?  Do you see things differently in the physical, waking world then most?  As an example, when I'm experiencing psychedelics with others, we usually aren't seeing the same visions in the shared physical, waking world together.  In fact the physical, waking world seems to not be there any longer sometimes (depending on which psychedelic).  But if we go on a walk in the park, in general we perceive we're in a shared environment that's in nature with trees, birds, and grass let's say.  

Your experience is your truth and is real for you.  My experience is my truth and is real for me.  Even though they are different, doesn't mean either of us is wrong.  But if we want to try to understand ourselves relating with others, we try to find a way to share, communicate, and achieve a compatible understanding.  Existentially speaking, my Real Life needs no validation from others; I know they won't understand, and I'm ok with that.  It's my own little world I'm exploring and discovering for myself.  Generally speaking, my Real life needs no validation, but I'm curious to hear other perspectives, because I know they're different then my own... which helps me gain a larger curiosity to my existential Real life.   

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1 hour ago, withinUverse said:

I was meaning raising consciousness work in ourselves and others.  There's a part of normal society moving in this direction already.  In my experience there's a larger amount of people moving towards the Green stage collectively, which is hopeful.  I'm working with some indigenous who are starting into the Orange, and I'm hoping to influence the few I'm with about some concerns with materialism.  Differently from other communities, because I assumed we might understand the importance of direct experiences over theoretical debates, comparatively speaking.  Most people I speak with don't know that theory doesn't equal understanding.  I was fantasizing about radically open-minded Actualizers who learned acceptance and respect for others.  

I'm already seeing some benefits I can gain.  There's a lot I'm working on, and I can see this Forum as a good way to continue my work.  That's what I love about it all... what you think is the proper setup isn't what you find... but what you find is what you need at the moment :)  

Hey, I enjoy the discussing with you.

I dont't see the forum help, it's just that more developed people tend to come here and then tend to go on to develop. Of course I don't know 100%... But it's very good possible to do stagnate or go backwards here. Especially if you expect to get lifted. On the bright side: Much fun, some a really good insight or link to a new book to get.

 

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@Juan

1 hour ago, Juan said:

I had done it here on Puerto Rico which is where I’m from and Florida. 

Puerto Rico, eh?  Everybody has great things to say about Puerto Rico.  I know I'll be making my way there sometime.  Do you dance by chance?  lol... I've met amazing dancers from Puerto Rico 

 

1 hour ago, Juan said:

Understandable, and damn that is quite of some ceremonies! Lol yeah you’ve done more than me, im at least around the dozen.  

lol... I've actually drank 48 times within 5 years... but I'm going to be drinking Aya for a while and I don't think I can continue to keep track.  Have you found any difference in your creativity since drinking Aya?  

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@supremeyingyang

6 minutes ago, supremeyingyang said:

Hey, I enjoy the discussing with you.

I dont't see the forum help, it's just that more developed people tend to come here and then tend to go on to develop. Of course I don't know 100%... But it's very good possible to do stagnate or go backwards here. Especially if you expect to get lifted. On the bright side: Much fun, some a really good insight or link to a new book to get.

 

I enjoy discussing with you as well.  Yeah, I've already found a book/manual I downloaded, and putting it into practice the last two nights.  I'm excited!  :)  I understand what you're saying, and it makes sense.  Thank you! 

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