I am struggling to find any top fitness/athletic babes who are available

[Hardkill]

I've always wanted to hook up with and/or date a girl who is a fitness model or a real athlete of some kind. I've been to many gyms, martial art studios, and other athletic clubs for many years and have talked to many girls at every gym I've been to. I've gotten with a couple of fit girls from this one LA Fitness gym I used to belong. My ex girlfriend was about a 7 to 8 in looks and she did yoga/pilates and some aerobics every week. 

However, none of those girls I got with had bodies that I would consider to be truly a 9 or a 10. Also, none of them were like college athletes, crossfit trainees, martial artists, or a well trained athlete of some kind. Every other gym girl and female athlete that I've ever talked to who were 9s or 10s, were either in a relationship with someone else or were single, but weren't interested in meeting up with me ever. 

I've been told by my family members that I don't need to get the hottest looking woman and I should just settle for someone who looks decent enough and has good qualities as a person.

I agree that it is better to be in a long-term relationship with someone who is okay looking and a good person than with someone who is really hot but is an asshole.

But that's not what I am looking for right now, and I really feel like I got to experience hooking up with or dating a super hot fitness babe at least one time in my life because those type of girls that really turn me on like crazy. Also, I've always been very much into fitness and have always loved playing all kinds of sports throughout my whole life. Therefore, I think I should be able to really connect well with some kind of super hot fit girls and athletic babes.

I just don't know what to do at this point.

[Federico del pueblo]

You probably have the best chances by becoming a fitness freak who has status within the fitness industry, like a yt channel, a lot of stuff on Instagram etc.

[Hardkill]

2 hours ago, Federico del pueblo said:

You probably have the best chances by becoming a fitness freak who has status within the fitness industry, like a yt channel, a lot of stuff on Instagram etc.

That's extremely unlikely to happen given how competitive it is.

Besides, most of the hot fitness and athletic girls that I've come across who were 9s and 10s had boyfriend or husbands who had no status in the fitness industry.

Edited August 23, 2022 by Hardkill

[Raze]

You have to go where those girls go. Try spin class or pole dancing class. But if you go to the class just to awkwardly hit on every woman that probably won’t work.

Try martial arts graduations or conventions. 

Edited August 23, 2022 by Raze

[integral]

I just don't get it. do you need to have sex with them to realize your experience with them will be identical to any other woman?

[Lila9]

Do you have examples of what you consider 9 or 10 fitness baby? (Lol)

Think from 9/10 babe's POV for a second: the thing is that the 9 or 10 fitness baby or whatever, like any woman, wants a man who would like her not for being 9 or 10 or even 8 and 7, because this kind of man is a shallow and fickle man, it's nearest impossible to feel safe and loved around such a man, because once you get pregnant, gain weight, experience bad period in your life and don't look the same, this kind of man will look for another 9-10 babe, this is who he is. He loves you conditionally for your looks. He sees you as a medal for his ego, he uses you to prove something for himself and others, he doesn't care about you.

 

How many men, who want her particularly for her look, this 9/10 babe, encounter everyday? Many. And you are one of those men so why she would choose you? You just another man who wants her particulary for being super attractive. Think about an attractive women who wants you because you are very rich and powerful. Not because she wants you but because she wants your money and power. Wouldn't you be offended? Would you chose this kind of woman over another woman who wants you for who you are? Who wants to bulit a real intimacy and connection with you? Who wants to support you even when you lose your money and power because she loves you?

 

Most women put so much energy and effort in looking good, being attractive and beautiful, but it doesn't mean that we want to be loved for that only. We want to be loved for who we are and we want it to be the main thing we are loved for. Our investment in beuty meant to attract men so at the end they will be interested to know us and love us.

Not to objectify us and use us as an ego medal.

You dated 7 and 8 women, why wasn't it enough for you? What ended those relationships? The same patterns that sabotaged your relationships with women from your past, will sabotage relationships with woman in your future, regardless looks. Are there any inner issues you need to work on in yourself? I'm sure there are.

Another thing is that, the more you want a particular type of woman, the less likely you will get it. Attachment to a certain desire creates a needy energy. As long as your live through this needy energy, your chances to get particulary what you want are lower.

Needy energy is repelling, no matter if you show it or not, just the fact that you have this needy desire creates this needy energy field around you.

The need of someone or something, the belief that only if your life would be in a certain and specific way, only then you'll really be happy/complete,  gives an unconscious sign to the people around you that you are in lack, that you are not happy with your life, that you are miserable now, and this, belive me or not, isn't attractive. People, especially women, feel it very well and try to avoid it. No one wants to bond her life with someone who broadcast lack and incompleteness. People want to be with people who broadcast completeness and abundance.

The key is to be detached from the outcome and from the desire to attract a particular person. But for real. It means focusing on your life, goals, hobbies, keep talking to women without expect it to be a romance or sex. Just talking for the sake of knowing another human slightly better and you'll increase the chances of them getting attracted to you, much more than if you operating from your needy desires. 

 

Edited August 23, 2022 by Lila9

[BlessedLion]

Bro I think you should do it. Don’t listen to them, follow your karma and experience this. Although it is ultimately a shallow distraction it sounds like you need to get it out of your system. 
 

once I was at a gym and saw a beautiful blonde with a body that was out of this world. I just walked up to her and said “Jesus I’m trying to work out here you’re distracting the shit out of me!” In a fun and flirty joking way. 
 

2 nights later we had sex and even a couple of nights of dates/sex

 

so my advice. Sack up, and cold approach the girls you are interested in. Just stay cool, respectful and fun because it could be creepy if done wrong 

[Nilsi]

Become the kind of person a 10/10 would want to date - it's not that complicated.

[BlessedLion]

And have balls…

[Raptorsin7]

@Lila9 But can't you make similar statements about any trait you find attractive?

If a man chooses a woman solely on her integrity and kindness, then wouldn't that be objectifying a different trait and then you could say well you only love me because of my integrity and kindness?

And how much of attraction between partners can be based on physical factors before it becomes unhealthy iyo? 

Do you have little to no physical standards? You wouldn't mind a guy who's 5ft0, skinny, poor posture etc?

[Roy]

If you want to sleep with the hottest/fittest women just go to an escort service. It's like $300 which is ironically probably less than what you'd spend before getting in bed with one the regular way LOL.

[Lila9]

@Raptorsin7 You right, but I think that in men's case, looks usually is the thing that they are the most attached to in women. They might have preferences like dating with a smart, kind and intresting woman but they are not as much attached to those traits as they are attached to appearance and beauty, in my opinion. 

I didn't say that men shouldn't choose a partner because they look good, or date with someone who they aren't attracted to just because she's kind.

No one chooses a partner for kindness only. My goal wasn't to moralize, or judge but to explain why man's attachment to our look is problematic, from woman's POV, and why it might cause unnecessary suffering for men (and women too).

There is a difference between preference for a specific look in women, and an attachment for a specific look in women. Many people confuse attachment with preference. It's completely different.

 Having preference for something means that this is what you want and what you would prefer in your life, but you don't suffer because you lack it. You are happy and complete living your life with it or without it. Even though you prefer it in your life, you are       detached          from it, you don't in need of it. 

Having-attachemnt for something or someone (it can be a person, idea, anything) means that you belive that only when you'll get it, you'll be happy and complete and as long as you lack it, you are unhappy. This inner mind game is energy that broadcasted to the world with the message that implying you are in lack of something and people sense it unconsciously. This energy is naturally repelling, before the object of attachment can even explain why(if it's a person). On the unconscious level this energy says to the object of attachment "please love me, I'm in lack, my ego is unhappy and isn't complete, I need this specific thing from you (look, money, power, attention, validation), otherwise I will be miserable", the needy energy is sucking energy because it doesn't create its own, this is why many times people feel lack of energy around needy people. People attracted to people who create their own energy, who aren't in need of them, who broadcast abundance rather than lack. 

Needy energy is controlling and manipulative, lacks in authenticity.

This is why when there is neediness, the harder one try to get something, the less likely he'll get what he wants, or he might get what he wants but not in the healthiest form. 

In OP's case, I might be wrong but it seems like he gives this needy vibe of lack.

Even though he dated and slept with beutiful women, have an hobbie in his life, is fit and young, he sounds miserable. He's attached to sleeping/dating with 9-10 "athletic babe" and even though he tried to make things happen they didn't happen. 

On the surface OP has all the reasons to feel complete and detached, but he doesn't because his inner mind game.

That shows that regardless abundance in person's life, he still can feel in lack and needy and vice versa.

 

 

Edited August 24, 2022 by Lila9

[mr_engineer]

Improve your validation-game. 

If you want someone this hot this bad, you have the potential to validate them. You just have to find someone who has that kind of body and who needs validation and you gotta give it to them. 

This is easier said than done. I'm just giving you a clue. HTH! 

[spiritual memes]

hit the gym and get SWOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Raptorsin7]

@Lila9 Okay yeah I see where you're coming from now. Thanks for sharing that was a well written response

[Hardkill]

On 8/23/2022 at 2:08 PM, Roy said:

If you want to sleep with the hottest/fittest women just go to an escort service. It's like $300 which is ironically probably less than what you'd spend before getting in bed with one the regular way LOL.

I don't think that's the way to go, unless a guy is in his mid 20s, hasn't lost his virginity yet, and has little to no experience dating women. 

Have you ever paid for an escort?

[Raze]

On 8/22/2022 at 10:42 PM, Raze said:

You have to go where those girls go. Try spin class or pole dancing class. But if you go to the class just to awkwardly hit on every woman that probably won’t work.

Try martial arts graduations or conventions. 

To add usually very attractive girls get private martial arts coaching as they don’t want to do it with weird guys, but they do show up to graduations and conventions.

Some other actives hot athletic women go to are ballerina and hip hop dance class.

7 hours ago, Hardkill said:

I don't think that's the way to go, unless a guy is in his mid 20s, hasn't lost his virginity yet, and has little to no experience dating women. 

Have you ever paid for an escort?

Ignore this guy. You learn nothing from escorts, build no social intelligence or connections, and it’s illegal. It can also be addictive. Not to mention std risk. Genuinely stupid advice.

Edited August 26, 2022 by Raze