somegirl

I am absolutely amazed by this couple

130 posts in this topic

 

6 hours ago, Proserpina said:

I don't think this is true. A low neurotic non-angry rational man can positively make me melt. The problem is they are very rare. 

They aren’t rare, you can find tons of them in IT. Women find them boring.

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5 hours ago, somegirl said:

But guys are emotional as well! How is that not obvious? They just hide their emotions because they are told they shouldn't show thise because it makes them "less masculine" or whatever.

Being emotional is universal human thing that has nothing to do with gender.

 

I’ve heard trans men (women transitioning to male) said after taking testosterone it made all their emotions reduce except anger. Men and women express and process emotions differently. 

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7 minutes ago, Raze said:

They aren’t rare, you can find tons of them in IT. Women find them boring.

Good point.

Women want emotional stimulation, not rationality.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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5 hours ago, Proserpina said:

The 'man' I spoke to,  that changed me through his rationality was not afraid to be emotional and feminine.  That's a part of being rational! The ability to be authentic and true while stepping back with low neuroticism when I would act inappropriately,  that's being rational. That resulted in a permanent shift in me. 

I truly understood then what it meant for the masculine to lead and the feminine to follow.  Most of the masculine already has low neuroticism developed. The masculine is like the sun and the feminine is the moon, she reflects the sun,  as Elliot Hulse states. She is molded. 

Him being emotional and feminine wouldn’t be things that come naturally to him if he is naturally low neuroticism, masculine, and rational, I’m guessing he made conscious effort to cultivate and learn it. 

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21 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

You can say this is toxic, but it delivers solutions.

Granted this might be because of the discourse at this time but what kind of solutions does this kind of mentality deliver? We don't live in a society where we have to kill or do anything brutal and if anything using brual/ unempathetic means can cause more harm than good so I am confused as to what kind of dirty work you are mentioning. Again, going back to current discourse, a lot of people argue that much of the reasons why men have difficulty forming healthy relationships with women is because of their lack of intimate and close relationships with other people, especially other men since they often bully one another to be stoic. 

And if we want to talk about the successful sociopaths and psychopaths, most of those people tend to fall under the category of petty criminals or people that a lot of people don't want to associate with. There are a handful that know how to use their tendencies to become really successful but they are successful despite their sociopathy, not because of it. And even when they are successful, often times it isn't something sustainable. 

Also I agree with the notion that all empathy is not good. I remember reading about how there is a darker side to empathy where people can use their understanding of others to hurt and manipulate them more effectively.

And no, I don't think that relationships are the only survival mechanism but I think knowing how to deal with people and yourself effectively by knowing how to be aware of your own emotions, regulate them, and communicate in a healthy way is a crucial part of being a well adjusted adult. 


I have faith in the person I am becoming xD

https://www.theupwardspiral.blog/

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1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

This doesn't mean the man cannot be emotional at times, in extreme situations. But overall a man should be icy and not give a fuck. Bus ran over your dog? Tough, let's move on to more important things. This is how a strong man must operate to get shit done in the world. You may not like it, but you also crave the results it delivers and the containment it confers.

Didnt you say the opposite of this on your "How to be a man part 2" video. There you said a strong man is in touch with his feminine side and stuff. Here you talk about the typical Blue masculinity which is more "soldier" or "bro" type.

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15 minutes ago, Raze said:

 

They aren’t rare, you can find tons of them in IT. Women find them boring.

Idk.

Boring became fascinating. I went from liking really out there sex to sex that was controlled and slow. Boring sex. With 'boring' guys. Boring would purify me. 

Also this only works with conscious ultra masculine manly men. 

Edited by Proserpina

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2 minutes ago, Raze said:

Him being emotional and feminine wouldn’t be things that come naturally to him if he is naturally low neuroticism, masculine, and rational, I’m guessing he made conscious effort to cultivate and learn it. 

Wouldn't someone being low in neuroticism make them more likely to be comfortable with expressing and regulating emotions rather than supressing them? 


I have faith in the person I am becoming xD

https://www.theupwardspiral.blog/

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2 minutes ago, Proserpina said:
4 minutes ago, Raze said:

Him being emotional and feminine wouldn’t be things that come naturally to him if he is naturally low neuroticism, masculine, and rational, I’m guessing he made conscious effort to cultivate and learn it. 

Idk.

Boring became fascinating. I went from liking really out there sex to sex that was controlled and slow. Boring sex. With 'boring' guys. Boring would purify me. 

Also this only works with a conscious ultra masculine manly man. 

I mean, you can be stable and be interesting. You can also be highly neurotic/toxic and boring as well. I don't see why it would be one or the other unless you find unhealthy behaviors as simulating and worth your time. And that isn't an woman thing, that's an unhealthy person thing. Like tends to attract like. 


I have faith in the person I am becoming xD

https://www.theupwardspiral.blog/

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1 hour ago, somegirl said:

I understand what you're saying. And it's true you have to first become a person who will be perfect much for such extraordinary partner. Couldn't agree more.

However, I'm not claiming I am that person right now. I definitely cannot handle everything you asked above at my current state of development.

I'm using this video as a reference of what is possible in this life. I'm just so inspired, hopeful and grateful when I see examples like this.

It's like God telling me "Yes, if you put in work, you might get this". 

I just want to use this to set intention on what I want in this life. I don't even like Eben and Annie's interaction in its entirety in this video. But an idea of being so open, to not hide anything, to feel safe enough to tell even the smallest emotional sensation you feel without feeling threatened is so... Wow. What a refreshing sight to see. 

Well then I believe you will get there. If you liked what you saw, truly in the depths of your being then you will pursue it and eventually become it. I totally believe you can do it....because you kind of did it right here. I did definitely poke you a bit and you remained calm so I think you are on your way. The key is to understand a man's POV. It took me 3 years to figure out a woman's POV and Spirituality just increased that knowledge. I think I actually need to fall back because I am becoming too much on the feminine side of love and I need to lean more back into the Masculine.

Its all about just maintaining balance. You don't have to be perfect. You just have to be willing. As long as you are willing to understand his POV you are already ahead of majority of the human race lol.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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34 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Granted this might be because of the discourse at this time but what kind of solutions does this kind of mentality deliver? We don't live in a society where we have to kill or do anything brutal and if anything using brual/ unempathetic means can cause more harm than good so I am confused as to what kind of dirty work you are mentioning.

This is very wrong and where you take a lot of what men do for you for granted.

Yes, we absolutely live in a society where we have to kill. Who butchers your meat? Who polices your streets? Who manipulates to get you oil for your car? Who cracks skulls to get you those cheap Walmart prices? Who enslaves the 3rd world on your behalf? Who fights your wars? Who strongarms foreign governments for you? Who carries out espionage and covert assassinations for you? Who protects your government from falling into the hands of far-right Nazis? Who chases down drug traffickers who would poison your kids with fentanyl? Who quells your school shootings? Who negotiates the business deals that are required for your job to exist? Who handles the wild animals when they chase after you? Who stops the bar fight? Who runs your prisons? Who guards your bank vaults? Who builds your nuclear weapons? Who drops your bombs? Who rapes mother nature to get you oil to drive your kids to school? Who mines the diamonds for your wedding ring? Who mines the cobalt using child labor for your electric batteries? Who forces workers in China to manufacture your iPhone for half the price it would otherwise cost you?

Society is built on a foundation of killing and enslaving people and stealing their resources and labor. There is no society without that. Your children can go to school and feed and clothe themselves because some men decided to kill, plunder, and enslave a bunch of other men to allow for it. And empathy is an obstacle to all that.

Look at what is happening in Ukraine.

The dirtiest work is done by men who cannot afford empathy or caring about feelings. Because to care about feelings you first have to be alive.

Quote

And if we want to talk about the successful sociopaths and psychopaths, most of those people tend to fall under the category of petty criminals or people that a lot of people don't want to associate with.

You underestimate the role sociopaths play in making the world run.

Who rules men? Femininity is not up to that task.

32 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

Didnt you say the opposite of this on your "How to be a man part 2" video. There you said a strong man is in touch with his feminine side and stuff.

Yes, but this is quite rare and requires a lot work to develop. And the girl then has to be developed enough to be attracted to it, appreciate it, and match his level.

Eben above is that kind of man. And of course he found himself the right girl to match.

Quote

Here you talk about the typical Blue masculinity which is more "soldier" or "bro" type.

Yes, because that's where most people are at and what most women are attracted to.

I am teaching regular people, not saints.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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14 minutes ago, Raze said:

Him being emotional and feminine wouldn’t be things that come naturally to him if he is naturally low neuroticism, masculine, and rational, I’m guessing he made conscious effort to cultivate and learn it. 

I think it was the peak state through attraction that influenced the interaction.  Mixed with his natural traits; his low neuroticism (I could trust him with my life) and leadership/assertiveness capacity. 


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Lol Leo you might need to do a whole series on how psychopaths contribute. I already understand that part since I looked into years ago. Every personality type excels in different environments. But I don't think people have understand the role a psychopath or sociopath play in business or even crime.

I can give an extreme example. America refuses to fix their gun issue. I am not advocating the following scenario so don't get any ideas: But if a sociopath went on a killing spree on all the elites, or their loved ones they would definitely change their perspective. Picture if the entire NRA were victims of gun violence. America would be singing a different tune.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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3 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I mean, you can be stable and be interesting. You can also be highly neurotic/toxic and boring as well. I don't see why it would be one or the other unless you find unhealthy behaviors as simulating and worth your time. And that isn't an woman thing, that's an unhealthy person thing. Like tends to attract like. 

Generally charisma, fun, and passion comes with irrationality and instability, and stability and rationality comes with being boring and less emotional. 

Edited by Raze

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10 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I mean, you can be stable and be interesting. You can also be highly neurotic/toxic and boring as well. I don't see why it would be one or the other unless you find unhealthy behaviors as simulating and worth your time. And that isn't an woman thing, that's an unhealthy person thing. Like tends to attract like. 

I think there was an appreciation for his 'boring' (I put in quotes) qualities like low neuroticism and intellect trait through peak state and attraction. Along side his consciousness, and I was melding to him, developing the same traits and similar values.  My predisposition to follow activated and I was able to shift and purify. 


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5 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

 Here you talk about the typical Blue masculinity which is more "soldier" or "bro" type.

I agree. 

Ultra masculine is not stage blue. It is high positive (not low compassion and low politeness) masculine traits in the big 5, creating strong attraction.  

Edited by Proserpina

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9 minutes ago, Raze said:

Generally charisma, fun, and passion comes with irrationality and instability, and stability and rationality comes with being boring and less emotional. 

Literally nothing is more exciting to me than a man who is stable and has is life together. And whose to say that being stable means you aren't emotional? And again: 

28 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Wouldn't someone being low in neuroticism (and high on stability) make them more likely to be comfortable with expressing and regulating emotions rather than supressing them? 


I have faith in the person I am becoming xD

https://www.theupwardspiral.blog/

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3 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Literally nothing is more exciting to me than a man who is stable and has is life together. And whose to say that being stable means you aren't emotional? And again: 

Even if they like it, it isn’t necessarily exciting for most women. Hyper logical and rational guys actually struggle a lot with attracting women and need to learn how to be less logical and more fun. Unstable/rebellious guys who are great at being funny and partying usually have an easier time getting girls, at least for short term relationships.

You can be emotional and stable, but they don’t naturally come together. 

3 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Wouldn't someone being low in neuroticism make them more likely to be comfortable with expressing and regulating emotions rather than supressing them? 

Women are on average more neurotic on men, but are also on average more comfortable expressing and regulating emotions then men.

neuroticism is associated with variability in emotions.

Edited by Raze

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Just now, Raze said:

Women are on average more neurotic on men, but are also on average more comfortable expressing and regulating emotions then men.

A lot of that has to do with the fact that women are both more likely to report this type of stuff and because they do bear more stress due to things like the patriarchy. This can manifest in a variety of ways including but not limited to higher degrees of self doubt and imposter syndrome, having to take on the additional workload of keeping up the home and taking care of kids, dealing with the fear of being assaulted, body image issues because of the way women's looks matter so much in the eyes of society etc. Yes, men also suffer in different ways because of the patriarchy but they do have the upper hand in the dynamic and as a result, aren't as negatively impacted. 

4 minutes ago, Raze said:

Hyper logical and rational guys actually struggle a lot with attracting women and need to learn how to be less logical and more fun 

A lot of these "hyper logical and rational guys" tend to have issues with getting out of their head and being present in these situations. Being in your head to the point where you are consumed with your thoughts and are overthinking your interactions with women is not rational. 


I have faith in the person I am becoming xD

https://www.theupwardspiral.blog/

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3 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

A lot of that has to do with the fact that women are both more likely to report this type of stuff and because they do bear more stress due to things like the patriarchy. This can manifest in a variety of ways including but not limited to higher degrees of self doubt and imposter syndrome, having to take on the additional workload of keeping up the home and taking care of kids, dealing with the fear of being assaulted, body image issues because of the way women's looks matter so much in the eyes of society etc. Yes, men also suffer in different ways because of the patriarchy but they do have the upper hand in the dynamic and as a result, aren't as negatively impacted. 

It isn’t necessarily just explained by social factors, there are also biological explanations for women’s higher neuroticism. Individually neuroticism is believed to generally be stable and genetic.

someone in easier life circumstances could be more neurotic than someone in harder circumstances simply because of their genetics.
 

3 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

A lot of these "hyper logical and rational guys" tend to have issues with getting out of their head and being present in these situations. Being in your head to the point where you are consumed with your thoughts and are overthinking your interactions with women is not rational. 

Logic and reason are in the head, emotion is more in the body. 
For example, hyper logical and rational guys have trouble joking around because jokes are generally illogical. 
 

Try doing a bunch of logical math problems or philosophy arguments for hours then suddenly trying to cut loose and socialize, and compare it to trying to cut loose and socialize after laughing and dancing some. The latter is far easier to get in the fun irrational groove of attraction.

Edited by Raze

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