integration journey

How do I be less logical with a girl and more emotional?

12 posts in this topic

Get drunk one night and talk to girls. Notice how non-logical you are.

Then do that sober.

You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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Try to be more open and vulnerable. 

Imagine you're sitting with a beer mug in hand and talking to a guy who is your close friend. Now won't you pour your heart out to this guy while drinking your beer. 

Now imagine that you are doing the same with the woman you're talking to.. 

Just be careful not to use vulgar words that you might casually use with your male friend. 

Rest is okay. Just cut out the vulgar part and everything is fine. 

Remember there is a fine line between "sexy" "spicy" and "vulgar." 

You can be sexy and spicy with a girl if she isn't too conservative (I hope not) but not vulgar. 

Spicy turns women on. Vulgar turns women off. 


Be cute and flirty but not OTT. 


Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 


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2 hours ago, Medhansh said:

except Todd V.

Dude knows nothing about emotion

The best way to do this is stop being so logical and be more emotional with YOURSELF, then you will naturally be able to relate to women more. When speaking with her, use emotional terms "i feel sad about...." "____ gets me so excited" etc

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One thing to try is to leave more gaps/spaciousness in your speech, pauses along with eye contact. When one goes on and on about something it tends to come off as more logical. 

I am Lord of Heaven, Second Coming of Jesus Christ. ❣ Warning: nobody here has reached the true God.

         ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ♪ 星空のディスタンス ♫┆彡 what are you dreaming today?

                           天国が来る | 私は道であり、真実であり、命であり。

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@integration journey

What I have to say on this is apparently different from the rest, but here it is:

Being overly logical comes from being "in your head".

Being in your head is a state of being dissociated from your body.

This can be caused by different things, usually a combination:

  • Having a job that requires you to be logical
  • Having friends that like to relate on a logical level
  • Caffeine
  • Trauma response, being triggered
  • Fear / fight-or-flight state. This is very common when doing something high stakes, such as approaching girls sober or speaking in public.

The solution is to practice on a daily basis to check in with your body.

Become aware of how you are feeling, again and again, until you develop a consistent awareness.

Learn what it feels like to be tense and in your head, and learn to consciously relax and drop your awareness down to your belly.

This can take months to get better at, but it is the answer.

There's tons of exercises that can help with that, such as:

  • Body awareness practice
  • Active meditations by Osho
  • Breathwork
  • Ecstatic dance
  • ... so many more

But the most important thing is to become aware: how am I feeling, what sensations are there, what emotions are there.

Do this as a habit, several times per day.

Developing basic body awareness will teach you a lot about yourself.

From there, having this awareness, you can share it:

You can talk about how things make you feel.

You can layer more emotions into your storytelling, because now you are aware of them.

Your stories become captivating and interesting this way.

People and girls will now instantly feel more connected to you.

Because emotions and feelings make people feel that they can relate to you and trust you. Not logic.

Hope that helps ?

Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread:

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Amazing question! In order to feel a girl’s emotions you have to be willing to feel your own, and willing to feel in general in the first place. This is where most guy’s journey with emotions end. Haha. I would start by practicing attunement with your own emotions first. 

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On 2022-02-10 at 8:37 PM, Medhansh said:

Yes, I need tips for the exact same problem. I couldn't find much good material for it, except Todd V.

Okay, as a guy that struggled to get laid from age 18-23 (one lay, my ex lmao) and then began sleeping with a lot of girls in age 24-25 (8 lays, and 5 more who gave me head but I didn't want to have sex or couldn't have sex), the key for me was the topic of conversation and the type of questions I asked.

One thing I used to do that sometimes makes me remember dates when I was younger where I could have definitely got laid BUT DIDN'T was the nature of the topics I spoke of and the type of questions.  

Leo mentions this in his 3 part series "How to get laid." 

Here is an example of an error with type of question:

  • You might say, "How was your day?" ...THIS IS BAD and logical and most importantly...BORING
    • An alternative EMOTIONAL way of asking the same question is,"What did you do today?''
      • She might say, "nothing much, you?"
        • And you then get emotional by saying, "NOTHING?! Damn, 24 hours of potential productivity all being lost...shame" with a cheeky playful smile (this is CRITICAL, if you say this seriously, she will think you are weird and cringe...)
          • If she reacts with a laugh, keep that convo going
          • If she reacts with a "Well...sorry, I'm not as cool as you"
            • You then say, "Yea, I'm much cooler, I spend my time productively cooking pasta" again with emotion, smile, fun spirit, and she might roll her eyes and you play along and build more...there is emotion 
              • She might ask "WHAT?! what kind of pasta?"
                • Say some bs after...this is weird, illogical, but HAS DEPTH AND EMOTION. SHE IS FEELING SOMETHING MAN!
          • Now, every girl will give you a different response, but the more you meet girls and game, the more you will mess it up and eventually learn how to do this. 
    • An alternative EMOTIONAL way of asking the same question is,"Did anything exciting happen in your life today'' which is the same as "How was your day?" but MORE EMOTIONAL 
      • Play along with what she says, keep the emotion up and then down and then up, never consistent, never boring 

Here is an example of an error with topic of conversation:

  • You might talk about career, school, political issues of where you guys live, weather, etc...NEVER DO THAT, CUZ EVERYONE ELSE DOES IT AND SHE WILL GET LOGICAL AND WILL NOT WANT TO BE INTIMATE 
    • Alternative topics is what she likes to listen to in terms of music, BUT YOU MUST do the thing leo says where you ADD qualifying statements.
      • "What music do you like to listen to?" 
        • She then says, "ummm I like Kpop!"
          • You say, "NO WAY, YOU LOOK LIKE AN EDM GIRL ON GODDD!!!" 
            • Notice how now there is curiosity in her mind
              • She is thinking "What about me gives off EDM? Why does he think that?"
              • The "On God" adds more emotion...
    • Another topic is travel, "do you travel?" and if she says no, "where would you travel if you could travel anywhere?"
      • She will say something like "Japan!!!"
        • You then say "I would have NEVER guessed that, I bet you watched all of Hunter X Hunter and Naruto and many animes like it"
          • You see what I did there?! ;) 
          • Emotion
      • She might say something like, "Barcelona tbh" but no emotion, she is not hooked yet
        • You then say, "Ohhh, you like the european vibes?! Sangria and Paella on a rooftop restaurant in Barcelona would be know what would make it better?"
          • Now, she might get more interested, you see her eyes open, you see her attention captured, and she says "what?!!!"
            • You then say something like "a spanish guitarist playing live music there while we look at the moonlight"
              • She will laugh and say "omg you're so CHEESY!!" 
                •  and now she is FEELING something, you are interesting...attraction will come soon

Good Luck Gents! Big Daddy Truth Seeker came to the rescue, now go get laid <3 

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To boil it down it comes down to thinking versus feeling. 

if you feel too much start thinking and if you think too much start feeling. 

Talk from your emotions and feelings. When you enjoy the other will. And if they don’t it is their problem. 

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Maybe instead look for a woman who's thinking:emotions ratio is compatible with yours instead of trying to make yourself into something you're not even comfortable with? You might be setting yourself up for pairing up with a woman you can't stand in the long term, once your true self bubbles back to the surface. That won't end well.

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throw away emotions. that's a feminine trait. get powerful and comfortable in your own skin. that's it. 

"If you kick me when I'm down, you better pray I don't get up"

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