Should I be worried about internal vibrations? 5meo dmt side effect

[khalifa]

It's been over 2 years since i've done my 5meo trip, However i still have these internal vibrations occurring in my body, I'm not sure if it will ever stop, they come and go, They used to be a 24/7 thing.

I've noticed fasting causes them to happen more often, Eating heavy meats or so seem to reduce or stop them.

Is it possibly a neurological issue that may affect my life later on life?

Edit: I still feel uneasy and stressed mostly, I'm always searching of distractions to not feel as bad, There seems to be a missing piece in me ever since the trip. I just cannot explain it, But i feel like i'll never be happy again.

Edited September 5, 2021 by khalifa

[Space]

@khalifa Tricky to answer this because it's such uncharted territory. If they're not as common as they used to be then its possible they will eventually completely subside. I know that people who have kundalini related energy symptoms report it subsiding after a while, but its gonna be different for everyone.

I definitely had a lot of energy in the body for a long time after my last session in mid 2020. I would constantly feel like I needed to shake the body, like release tension almost. It's gone now. 

This is just speculating and guessing but i'd say it isn't a neurological issue but just energy trapped in the body. This is quite common for people engaging in spiritual work. 

[ZzzleepingBear]

On 2021-09-05 at 7:20 AM, khalifa said:

It's been over 2 years since i've done my 5meo trip, However i still have these internal vibrations occurring in my body, I'm not sure if it will ever stop, they come and go, They used to be a 24/7 thing.

I've noticed fasting causes them to happen more often, Eating heavy meats or so seem to reduce or stop them.

Is it possibly a neurological issue that may affect my life later on life?

Edit: I still feel uneasy and stressed mostly, I'm always searching of distractions to not feel as bad, There seems to be a missing piece in me ever since the trip. I just cannot explain it, But i feel like i'll never be happy again.

May I ask what your initial reason for taking 5meo back then was? Was it for a particular spiritual purpose or just more out of a naive curiosity?

The reason I ask, is not to open up a oppertunity to point any fingers at you if you merely did take it out of curiosity. but it could give some better context to your curent situation with what you consider to be a negative side effect as you describe it.

It can be like this just to give an example, if you are shaky without knowing why. You become confused/worried. If you feel and know that you are nervous, then the shaking immediately makes a alot more sense. But you see, people are sometimes unfamiliar with a certain mental state if they happen to shift into it, so the physical symptoms becomes the thing that first draws in all their attention, instead of the mental root it is manifesting from.

I'm not suggesting that your situation are anything as what I describe above, but with some more context, it could be easier to determine what may be the root problem.

[Breakingthewall]

@khalifa i have had a similar problem but only a few days. I'm sure it's an energy block, not neurological at all. you have started something and you have not finished it. I would try to finish it, having blocked energy feels like something very negative, dangerous

Edited September 6, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Thought Art]

maybe do yoga or qigong

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

What happens when you allow them to happen ? Giving them space to unfold.

[khalifa]

 

On 9/6/2021 at 4:31 PM, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

What happens when you allow them to happen ? Giving them space to unfold.

@Giulio Bevilacqua they feel like super shit gets worse and more painful every time. Feel like the trip is starting again all over again, Body burning into my bed, Instead of into the floor but this time in super slow motion like it'll never stop. which happened so quickly my first time.

Although after talking to martin for 2 hours, He suggested i'd read his books, there were techniques of how i could handle them and make it easier on me, And i did to them it did feel better at times, But sometimes it just became way too much to handle,  that it would result in a severe panic attack. I'd have to stop, And say something insane like, I'm sorry i cannot love you and let go right now (to keep my self sane), Please leave me alone and stop whatever it is your trying to show me, dear mother,  I just can't process it right now.

 

It's not always the same, there were various different effects that i mostly forgotten, but some were like time zooming i would describe it as that, Felt like my body was going back and forth consciousness way too infinity fast it was annoying, Stuck in time for long periods of time. Felt like years that when i'm back to my body i forget that i'm even human takes me awhile to figure out, that i'm this character, and i start crying when i realize what just happened and i'm still in this hell hole.

Way more weird side effects that were happening on the months i already forgot most of them, but this was 2 years ago first 4-8months mostly, Later on it was just the burning sensation re-occurring most commonly melting into bed.

On 9/6/2021 at 3:21 PM, Breakingthewall said:

@khalifa i have had a similar problem but only a few days. I'm sure it's an energy block, not neurological at all. you have started something and you have not finished it. I would try to finish it, having blocked energy feels like something very negative, dangerous

@Breakingthewall  Yeah i can feel it in my body, I've aged rapidly, Feel very stressed. (increased tinnitus which are very unbearable at times makes me feel suicidal. Yet not sure if that's a longterm side effect from nootropic/supplements which was influenced by self actualizing)

 

On 9/6/2021 at 11:42 AM, ZzzleepingBear said:

May I ask what your initial reason for taking 5meo back then was? Was it for a particular spiritual purpose or just more out of a naive curiosity?

The reason I ask, is not to open up a oppertunity to point any fingers at you if you merely did take it out of curiosity. but it could give some better context to your curent situation with what you consider to be a negative side effect as you describe it.

It can be like this just to give an example, if you are shaky without knowing why. You become confused/worried. If you feel and know that you are nervous, then the shaking immediately makes a alot more sense. But you see, people are sometimes unfamiliar with a certain mental state if they happen to shift into it, so the physical symptoms becomes the thing that first draws in all their attention, instead of the mental root it is manifesting from.

I'm not suggesting that your situation are anything as what I describe above, but with some more context, it could be easier to determine what may be the root problem.

@ZzzleepingBear  Just wanted to experience Infinity since i wanted to find more deeper meaning in life. I wanted to feel the bliss of being one with god, The ones always fascinated me.

Before doing 5meo, I used to follow abraham hicks in a mad way where i really thought i was god and i am manifesting creating stuff, Felt super happy with my life compared to now, Was crazy enough to even walk down a road not caring to see right or left if cars would hit me since i've felt invisible.

I still wanted more, Was curious to see my self as infinity. Went for it and i got destroyed, Didn't feel like i was god at all, it felt like, i would die right now, and i'd never be alive ever again. Plus the amount of terror I've faced felt so unreal, It felt like infinite terror. Which kept scaring me since i'm not in control and life is just so scary and terrible that I'm so powerless getting my soul/energy raped over and over. While i could do nothing to counter it or make it stop. I felt super fearful at that moment. From a high thinking i'm all that before doing it and i'd just go to a fun trip. To a destroyed PTSD like state lasting for quite awhile. I still feel better these days panic attacks and trips stopped now. Took it almost 2 years to recover. from that. Just vibrations and random worry is bothering me giving me an uneasy mind.

Note before abraham hicks, I've been very hardcore at self actualizing. I've listened to all leo's videos over and over cycled between them at least 3 times each video. Since i used to talk 1-2 hour walks daily for years, with earphones It was enough to cover his content more than once. Bought his life purpose course, Bought his self help books. Listened to lots of self help books that were on audio on my walks, Listened to spirituality ones like jed mckenna from what i can remember and whatever was available from them.  Would listen to sadhguru/rupert spira/adyashanti/mooji/infinite waters/teal swan/lester levesen/alan watts/ etc etc various spiritual teachers and lots of spiritual content, I'd binge through.

I'd meditate for hours. Sometimes minutes. I used to love meditating, Now these days they just feel super scary.

But eventually i felt everything was fine the moment i found abrham hicks, which just made my mentality feel way better, never worried, so happy everyday, felt so good about myself and life and my existence finally, Never have been so happy in my life it was quite insane, Thinking i'm so awesome/amazing god created everything around me with such amazing placebo effect, Which made my ego so good about being the ultimate selfish human being out there. I was always fortunate even with my crazy acts so i never doubted i'm not god.

But psychedelics were a common discussion on the forum. So reading those posts made me feel like maybe i should check it out for fun and see what I've created. So it was a brutal awakening to feel the highest high of my ego life shattered to the lowest low. Quite a shock. Even ibogaine for 72hours straight wasn't as bad as 5meo. At least on ibogiane i was on a high of appreciating everything on life. Didn't need more of an answer. (I did ibogaine around 2 weeks ago before the 5meo. (Note these 2 were the only psychedelics i took. I know i'm pretty crazy just going for the top 2 crazy psychs out there that i could find. But this is how serious i was about self improvement/infinity and finding more)

I've worked so hard during my self actualization that eventually letting go of it was the best thing, I did I let go of improvement, I became so selfish that it just made me happy not caring much about anything or anyone, I'd just love having fun at every moment what could i do to have more fun all the time, And I'd just give myself all the love and priority over everything. It was such an amazing deluded state to be in for me compared to all the people pleasing that I've done in my life with no one appreciating me or all the work i've done.

I've had messed up experiences where I was always under credited, people would leech of me my work. And just argue and make things harder for me even though i'm clearly being a doormat, Yet the power abuse wouldn't stop. So finally making all that stop felt so much better.

But nope not for all, Here comes 5meo, Hello mr.ego, Think you control everything? Well guess what here's infinite terror. Not so powerful now are you? I'm sorry please leave me alone. make it stop..

 

 

Sometimes I wonder if I'm deluded about infinity. (I'd practice a lot of magic like acts, where i try to control reality in the past as well, My techniques were mainly Will/Intent/magicka besides LOA, I feel like LOA is weak sauce compared to them. And yet i can't control shit. I can't bend life/dream to be the way i want it to be. )

 

This question goes to the whole forum. Please kindly participate, I would like to read all of your answers.

When it comes to manifesting what we want, I'm just wondering why do we all have so many limitations where it doesn't seem like life is infinite and rather we're always stuck within physical limitations of this dream?

 

As much as i believe life is a dream it should bend to our wants. Yet it doesn't do that like it does in a dream.

I could answer myself saying oh well life is infinite so clearly you are experiencing a more limited version of a physical plane field with very low lee way/priority of it going the way you want it to. What's your answer? I hate mine. I want more power over this shitty dream already.

 

I'm genuinely salty, Life is supposed to be the way you want it to be, and not the other way around.  fun is my cherry pick, Yet it seems quite painful with lots of unwanted suffering, That i believe i never signed up for, What is this shit. Give me a break. 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 7, 2021 by khalifa

[Breakingthewall]

57 minutes ago, khalifa said:

Went for it and i got destroyed, Didn't feel like i was god at all, it felt like, i would die right now, and i'd never be alive ever again. Plus the amount of terror I've faced felt so unreal

It's no more than you ego facing his dissolution. keep in mind that the ego is no joke, it is very powerful. I had that experience, it's terror. the infinite nothingness swallows you and annihilates you, and there is no god of love, only death at an unimaginable level. It is your ego that you do not want to let go. that very experience is god without your ego screaming. I had to do it many more times and meditate many hours daily for almost a year until I was able to let go. a real job. I'd say you have to or you can get sick. It is what I felt, it was not an option, it was necessary. the result is liberation

[Nahm]

@khalifa

I’d find a good therapist and meet as often as is possible, and express how you feel. Every time the past and or trips come up, ‘return’ to the present and express how you feel right now. Overtime outlook and attitude (right now) in relation to the love you are (right now) will be realized, vs how you feel right now being caused by past experiences. Those are thoughts arising, memories, (not a past) and they are not in alignment with truth, love, or, the now… with you. 

[Tefikos]

@khalifa

 

It's energy moving in your body and you're subconsciously resisting it with all your limiting beliefs and fears. Some shadow material might have surfaced and now your body tries to keep it down.

I just found that most helpful thing to do is to look inside straight into the burning and painful feeling and accept the resistance, even think that you don't want to experience the thing it's blocking. Then after a while it will let go it's grip, but you need to keep repeating letting it go. It only feels painful when you don't look straight into the resistance itself and you might even need to let the resistance to the resistance to go first.

This is a letting go technique and it is really powerful for giving up the resistance and all that is.

 

Edited September 7, 2021 by Tefikos
Added more context

[ZzzleepingBear]

8 hours ago, khalifa said:

As much as i believe life is a dream it should bend to our wants. Yet it doesn't do that like it does in a dream.

I could answer myself saying oh well life is infinite so clearly you are experiencing a more limited version of a physical plane field with very low lee way/priority of it going the way you want it to. What's your answer? I hate mine. I want more power over this shitty dream already.

 

I'm genuinely salty, Life is supposed to be the way you want it to be, and not the other way around.  fun is my cherry pick, Yet it seems quite painful with lots of unwanted suffering, That i believe i never signed up for, What is this shit. Give me a break.

 

It's nothing wrong with chasing a dream, but as you do. Keep in mind that a dream is a dream in the absolute sense. It has to do with waking up from it as well at some point in time. Some have wonderful dreams, and some have dreams turning into nightmares. People who realize that they are stuck in a bad dream, or a nightmare are usually those who are more inclined to spiritual practices inorder to penetrate the dreamstate and wake them selves up.

I admire your honesty, but some of your thought may be causing you more trouble than the good they might bring. So let's take a look at some.

 

8 hours ago, khalifa said:

Life is supposed to be the way you want it to be, and not the other way around.

 

If you set aside your belief about it being true. Then how do you know this to be true?

 

8 hours ago, khalifa said:

fun is my cherry pick, Yet it seems quite painful with lots of unwanted suffering, That i believe i never signed up for

 

If you cherry pick fun over anything else, then set yourself up for alot of suffering by becoming blindsided to your true inner strenghts and nuanced abililties that doesn't always revolve around what could be considered fun.

You don't necessarily need to suffer from cherry picking fun stuff, but you are at a greater risk of suffering if you have riggid beliefs about reality I'd say. If you are not aware of your inner resistances, then that can create alot of confusion and suffering as well.

 

 

There is alot that can be said, but I think I leave it at this for now. And while I don't think that you need to consume any more spiritual content as your primary goal. However, I do think that you may get some good help, by looking into Byron Katies worksheet with her 4 simple questions. And the reason I recommend you to look into her work, is because the context that you given here, suggest that you hold alot of unquestioned beliefs it seems.

Also, don't rush through those questions if you look into it, because those questions is meant to be contemplated on. So keep up the honesty you display here, and that should work in your favour if you decide to do the work.

Edited September 7, 2021 by ZzzleepingBear

[peanutspathtotruth]

@khalifa Hey I remember your posts from 2 years ago, it's good to hear from you again. I'm really sorry this is still so painful for you, and I genuinely think it's good that you are sharing all this with us.

You probably went too far too quickly, and you seem to understand this - and there's nothing to feel bad or guilty about, it is what it is. A lot of growth at once is fucking heavy. 

In my humble opinion, you gotta bite the bullet and finish what you started. There is no going back, the pandoras box has been opened. What this means, I think, is that you have to work with this with a lot of commitment and intensity. This seems to be the only way. Nahm said therapy, I think that's a great idea. But moreover, I'd say you need energetics work. Physical yoga, maybe soft Kriya yoga to circulate your energy, and a lot of do-nothing meditation + inquiry. I feel like you gotta take all your courage together and give it your all, as in facing all the fear and let go of everything by doing the practices. Do you take ashwaghanda or something else to ease your system? 

As for meditation, this is spot on:

6 hours ago, Tefikos said:

@khalifa

I just found that most helpful thing to do is to look inside straight into the burning and painful feeling and accept the resistance, even think that you don't want to experience the thing it's blocking. Then after a while it will let go it's grip, but you need to keep repeating letting it go. It only feels painful when you don't look straight into the resistance itself and you might even need to let the resistance to the resistance to go first.

It's gonna be tough. Maybe it's gonna be tough for a long time. Probably it will. But this is the way, and it is a great opportunity for you to allow yourself to trust Truth, to let it encompass you fully via your process of purification and healing. This is the divine helping you, trust it ?? you're always safe, always held. 

Regarding your question, I don't think following the desire to bend everything after your will is the healthiest thread to follow, depending on where your desires come from. What helps me is to talk to myself about all that I worry about, desire, fear, love and examine all that comes up. Be 100% honest. This can quickly align your whole thinking towards what the deepest part in you wants. When you're honest and sensible, you will feel the authenticity and truthfulness of the thoughts coming up. You got this ♥️ 

[JuliusCaesar]

I suffered from a similar problem about 5 months ago. I had experienced a trip reactivation after listening to a Sahasrara opening Tibetan Bowl sounds. Specifically, I experienced extreme full body nausea(far worse than when actually on the drug). My mind was more powerful than usual, and I was able to finally find a solution. I chanted LAM while listening to the Muladhara activating frequency. After about 3 hours of that I was fine and went to sleep.

 

As to your desire to manipulate reality with your mind. I would say you have taken the most noble pursuit a human could have. The issue is it's also one of the most arduous undertakings. You see, your whole life you've thought and felt things that directly contradict the notion that you're infinitely powerful. So now it seems impossible to you. You can break the illusion, but it will require tremendous faith and willpower to do so.

Edited September 7, 2021 by JuliusCaesar
spelling error

[Flint]

On 7/9/2021 at 0:02 PM, khalifa said:

Even ibogaine for 72hours straight wasn't as bad as 5meo. At least on ibogiane i was on a high of appreciating everything on life. Didn't need more of an answer. (I did ibogaine around 2 weeks ago before the 5meo. (Note these 2 were the only psychedelics i took. I know i'm pretty crazy just going for the top 2 crazy psychs out there that i could find. But this is how serious i was about self improvement/infinity and finding more)

Well here is your mistake. You did only Ibogaine once and then 5-MEO-DMT once, and got absolutely wrecked by it.

A "normal" (it all depends on how you react) mushroom trip can destabilize you deeply for months and even more. This is why you start with small graduate doses and integrate it, slowly, over years with many several trips. Then, you try different psychedelics to see how they feel.

You want to carefully place a little bit of dynamite here and there in your mine to dig deeper/faster and discover the gold - not throw a ton of it randomly and crumble everything.