Giulio Bevilacqua

How to overcome regret of past actions ?

18 posts in this topic

Hi evryone.

I am dealing with strong feelings of regret in the last days. Regret about having done things without knowing the consequences, doing things blindly.

I did a 5 months semen retention.  Releasing semen was for me like giving away gold. 

Now i am facing energetic blocks/pains and obstacles due to a Kundalini awakening that has surely risen from this retention. 

I know that i can not go back, and surrender to your past actions is the only way maybe. But it is damn hard to face your stupidity. Just because i read or watched some youtube videos u find yourself messing up life and also people around you. 

Was wondering, if your actions took you to do certain things maybe it was the case to do so, and could not be otherwise. But i do not know if this is just a story that one can tell to its'self f just to fool himself.  

Are there mistakes ? 

 

 

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Why aren't you reframing this as a blessing in disguise?

Kundalini activation is something many people spend years trying to achieve. And here you got it for free.

I have a book on my book list which talks about how to active kundalini safely and how to deal with obstructions and problems.


You are God. You are Love. You are Infinity. You are Leo.

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1 hour ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

Hi evryone.

I am dealing with strong feelings of regret in the last days. Regret about having done things without knowing the consequences, doing things blindly.

I did a 5 months semen retention.  Releasing semen was for me like giving away gold. 

Now i am facing energetic blocks/pains and obstacles due to a Kundalini awakening that has surely risen from this retention. 

I know that i can not go back, and surrender to your past actions is the only way maybe. But it is damn hard to face your stupidity. Just because i read or watched some youtube videos u find yourself messing up life and also people around you. 

Was wondering, if your actions took you to do certain things maybe it was the case to do so, and could not be otherwise. But i do not know if this is just a story that one can tell to its'self f just to fool himself.  

Are there mistakes ? 

 

 

Thats an inspiration for others on this forum to start semen retention /Brahmacharya. 

And really we have all made mistakes, it is human. All that matters is what you will do now, we can't change the past. Kudos on the 5 months. 

 

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I think the first thing to understand is that the regret serves no useful purpose, dwelling on what you did or didn't do just keeps you stuck; it's one of those secondary or 'cover' emotions that people often get caught in (other examples include anger, resentment, and self-pity), and it tends to be designed, unconsciously, to prevent you from feeling a more painful emotion like grief or despair. So you have to feel that deeper emotion in order to move past the regret, and in order to do that you have to be very conscious in your body, noticing where the inner resistance is and allowing it to release - and that might take time and concerted effort.

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

I have a book on my book list which talks about how to active kundalini safely and how to deal with obstructions and problems.

Ooh interesting, I'll have to give that a look - thanks for the heads up.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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The only reason you are feeling regret is because you are viewing it as losing something. You could just as easily view it as a blessing. The situation is neutral. You are the one determining what the meaning is. Change the meaning and you will change the outcome. 

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@Giulio Bevilacqua Guilt and regret for what? You did what you thought was the best action to make at the time. Maybe this kundalini activation will be the best thing that ever happened in your life and you'll laugh at this when it's over?


Only the phonies won't end up enlightened.

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5 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

I know that i can not go back, and surrender to your past actions is the only way maybe. But it is damn hard to face your stupidity. Just because i read or watched some youtube videos u find yourself messing up life and also people around you.

Of course the past facts can't be changed, just our interpretation of them. So yes, surrender, acceptance, or self-forgiveness is the sane thing to do (however you prefer to frame it). Who hasn't done stupid or crazy things sometimes? I dunno what you did but there's sure to be far worse things otherwise you'd be in prison or something. I know nothing about kundalini or semen retention, but one thing I've learned is that we can be our own worst critics. Life and society need good, talented, hard working people right now and are more forgiving of us than we are of ourselves. 


Relax, it's just my loosely held opinion.  :) 

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What has been done, has been done. You can't go back. It's normal to feel like that, but remember that you also can move on.

Maybe this is a challenge God/the Universe/etc. made you face in order to grow: you were meant to experience this situation. It's all planned, like new age people like to say.

The very fact that you regret the work done is the first obstacle of the challenge.

When life gets tough, may your love be tougher.

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@Giulio Bevilacqua I thought you said you had a guru...
Anyway do these pains manifest only in meditation? can you work/study properly?
Maybe leave meditation on the side and try to implement some physical activity in your day, like running etc. and see if something change.

Be positive! it's just a phase. Endure it, allow it, accept it. You are growing. Focus on the things you have learned.

When the storm has passed i suggest to Get a good manual of Kriya Yoga or Buddhism and follow it TO THE LETTER.

 

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Posted (edited)

13 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Why aren't you reframing this as a blessing in disguise?

Kundalini activation is something many people spend years trying to achieve. And here you got it for free.

I have a book on my book list which talks about how to active kundalini safely and how to deal with obstructions and problems.

It is a blessing for someone who consciously seeks it and knows what it seeking. 
Suppose you get your driving license and than you have a Lamborghini to drive. Or you start to climb mountains and the first one choose is K2 or Everest.

I tried many things now, but it seems that evry technique is an obstacle, there is immediately a tension of effort and doing to get rid of symptoms. Also meditation, or watching the breathing is still and effort and can clearly see that the body gets tension. If I just relax and allow the body to let go of control it immediately starts to spin and whirling on its axis so fast that I can not hold such speed anymore. I tried many times to go into it, but it is too much force. 

Edited by Giulio Bevilacqua
Correct

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6 hours ago, _Archangel_ said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua I thought you said you had a guru...
Anyway do these pains manifest only in meditation? can you work/study properly?
Maybe leave meditation on the side and try to implement some physical activity in your day, like running etc. and see if something change.

Be positive! it's just a phase. Endure it, allow it, accept it. You are growing. Focus on the things you have learned.

When the storm has passed i suggest to Get a good manual of Kriya Yoga or Buddhism and follow it TO THE LETTER.

 

No they are constantly there. I can not do anything and do not want to do anything. 
The pain gets healed only if I allow my body to do its own things spontaneously, like I said it starts to spin like a tornado and it is so scary because of too much intensity. 

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3 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

If I just relax and allow the body to let go of control it immediately starts to spin and whirling on its axis so fast that I can not hold such speed anymore. I tried many times to go into it, but it is too much force. 

@Giulio Bevilacqua Do you mean you feel like spinning( much like when you're drunk) or do you actually start to spin like a tornado?
Does it get worse when you close your eyes? Could it be labyrinthitis?

3 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

The pain gets healed only if I allow my body to do its own things spontaneously, like I said it starts to spin like a tornado and it is so scary because of too much intensity. 

If you feel that you heal then try to schedule atleast 30 mins a day to let go and let your body do its thing without jugment or control. Resist and edure it.






 

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1 hour ago, _Archangel_ said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua Do you mean you feel like spinning( much like when you're drunk) or do you actually start to spin like a tornado?
Does it get worse when you close your eyes? Could it be labyrinthitis?

If you feel that you heal then try to schedule atleast 30 mins a day to let go and let your body do its thing without jugment or control. Resist and edure it.






 

Spinning like children do. But at such a speed that it is not normal to handle I would die maybe. It’s a spontaneous movement 

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Like this, but at such high speed that kicks m brain out of the skull 

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6 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

The pain gets healed only if I

… let go of my contingency upon healing. 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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1 hour ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

Spinning like children do. But at such a speed that it is not normal to handle I would die maybe. It’s a spontaneous movement 

6 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

No they are constantly there. I can not do anything and do not want to do anything. 

@Giulio Bevilacqua Don't do anything that can hurt you obviously.
You can consider scheduling a session with a kundalini expert and see what they think about it. 

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@Giulio Bevilacqua One word: Conviction (but not behind bars)

Conviction determines the flow of energy which generates the charge that changes the state which rewires (or analogously energetic cellular reformation) the systems that create the feeling of regret. 

You're energetically linked to the associations that create the regret, so you of course you have to energetically unlink yourself through the power the mind has to master the regulation of its movement, shaping and creation of energy. Force creates momentum which turns that pumping action into the pruning of vines and generation of new vines that separate you from perceptions that created and held you to a past fractal that kept you chained outside your ability to adequately perceive the present moment outside your own biases.

You use that tool, after you've determined the lesson, of course. Denial is like gun powder left on a black concrete floor waiting for the police to do a sweep. Don't let it go, address all addressments consciousness is making, that's why it's sounding the sounds it makes, regret is just one of the louder alarms depending on its intensity and what it's contrasted within consciousness at the time. 

The path is energy mastery. Almost no other.

The more we betray ourselves on our path of mastery, the more we're unknowingly unethical inwardly in our direction of energy and it does catch up with us so we will go to prison for it. When it does though, and we feel the inescapable crushing bars tightening against the living space within our consciousness through feelings of regret or whatever it is, this is the only key out outside of pointers and subtle influencers we're lucky to experience (much of the entertainment industry unfortunately is a reality escape for people rather than being the thing that helps them process their experiences towards higher integration, though some films and artists do operate towards this principle). 

There is a certain inner authority you will need to grow overtime in order to achieve this which is why I question some of the advice I give and whether I should give it at all because of how premature it can be for the level that most people are on in areas of self awareness and the ability to use this reflector of consciousness engineer activity based on more sophisticated directions it learns via experience.

My motto from now on is people will just get it raw from me even if they don't immediately understand because who knows perhaps it'll be useful to someone else that does understand in the moment or via my profile history in the future.

Parole officer tuning out now, back to prison until you work through this. All the best with that, let's make your prison sentence the shortest we can because we've got some crims in the yard (aka other emotions that may spring up which create a worse downward spiral) that likely going to try and pick a fight, while you're there just keep to yourself or stick with the biggest guy (aka honing energetic frequencies that will enable you to deal with regret and otherwise well). 


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1 hour ago, Nahm said:

… let go of my contingency upon healing. 

Didn’t understand what you mean 

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