Shin

One of the most important thing to understand about women

491 posts in this topic

8 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Consent doesn't mean stopping when you get shouted NO. It is looking for a YES.

Yes before what? Before a kiss? And how many times should a guy ask for consent? Is it just a one time thing, or is it "ok, can I touch your boobs now?"

This shit truly fascinates me😅 on one hand, you are told to always ask for consent, on the other hand you are shamed for being a pussy if you do so. I guess you just can't win, can you? Lol

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11 minutes ago, intotheblack said:

And this is why it needs to be discussed here for more awareness, because nothing ever gets mentioned about consent. Guys tell eachother not to listen to girls opinions on this. 

@bejapuskas made a comment about this before on another thread. 

 

consent-is-clear.jpg

These type of graphics are nice. I've hard they are now very common in sexual education classes. 


Association with the wise is the root cause for obliterating all misery. -  Tripura Rahasya

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What matters is visual cues, and the tone of the voice.

If you have decent emotional intelligence, you don't need to hear a yes or a no.


Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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3 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

Yes before what? Before a kiss? And how many times should a guy ask for consent? Is it just a one time thing, or is it "ok, can I touch your boobs now?"

This shit truly fascinates me😅 on one hand, you are told to always ask for consent, on the other hand you are shamed for being a pussy if you do so. I guess you just can't win, can you? Lol

You've got to read it. You cannot miss a woman when she is into it. If it feels like a yes, it's probably a yes.

And a lot of time it will be implicit rather than explicit. But you can also ask if she is into it if you are not sure at the beginning of the interaction. It's more like if she's tensed and try to avoid the sex that you've got to be worried.


Association with the wise is the root cause for obliterating all misery. -  Tripura Rahasya

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@Etherial Cat I don't necessarilly have a problem with that definition, except the "ongoing" part. Which is just fucking ridicilous lol. You really expect men to ask for consent all the time? That's like the ultimate mood killer for women.

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1 minute ago, Peter Miklis said:

@Etherial Cat I don't necessarilly have a problem with that definition, except the "ongoing" part. Which is just fucking ridicilous lol. You really expect men to ask for consent all the time? That's like the ultimate mood killer for women.

No, she's asking men to be aware in real time in their head by screening their cues every step of the way.

Instead of being autistic and rationalizing what has been said or not like we do between men.


Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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Just use common sense guys, be assertive but not violent. It is not rocket science.

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Posted (edited)

@Harlen Kelly hahaha this is actually funny

25 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

This shit truly fascinates me😅 on one hand, you are told to always ask for consent, on the other hand you are shamed for being a pussy if you do so. I guess you just can't win, can you? Lol

What fascinates me is the extend on how too many men would project their desire onto the woman to the point they actuallly think the woman want it too. So then all her "No 😅" or "No :(" really look like a "No~😋😘😍" to him. 

 

20 minutes ago, Shin said:

What matters is visual cues, and the tone of the voice.

If you have decent emotional intelligence, you don't need to hear a yes or a no.

-

No, she's asking men to be aware in real time in their head by screening their cues every step of the way.

Instead of being autistic and rationalizing what has been said or not like we do between men.

On point. 

Edited by mivafofa

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Posted (edited)

8 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

Just use common sense guys, be assertive but not violent. It is not rocket science.

What is common sense to you is totally not obvious for a lot of guys.

And for those who have been redpilled, it is blue pill bullshit, beta advices. 

Edited by Shin

Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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I guess understanding consent shouldn't be too hard. I'd say that a woman who is giving very confusing signs is probably not worth chasing anyway, because who knows she might charge you with nonsensical claims and frame you. Most honest women are not going to play that kind of game. It's easy to tell if she wants a kiss or not. If she doesn't want, she will politely refuse. If she is toying too much, then she is being gross and indirect. Guys acting like they don't understand consent lack in emotional intelligence and social intelligence. No decent woman will create a fuss out of it. 

 


 INTP loner... .shy girl.. 

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1 minute ago, Peter Miklis said:

@Etherial Cat I don't necessarilly have a problem with that definition, except the "ongoing" part. Which is just fucking ridicilous lol. You really expect men to ask for consent all the time? That's like the ultimate mood killer for women.

Think about it, it's not because a girl gives you a finger that you're entitled to take an arm. ;)

Just pay attention if consent is being actively retracted. It can happen.

Or maybe she's not into a particular thing for X reasons.

If you want to really have great sex with her you anyway will need a high degree of intimacy and attunement to her needs and wants.

 


Association with the wise is the root cause for obliterating all misery. -  Tripura Rahasya

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27 minutes ago, Shin said:

What matters is visual cues, and the tone of the voice.

If you have decent emotional intelligence, you don't need to hear a yes or a no.

Right. Of course. We should teach body language and non verbal cues, instead of this retarded consent bullshit. Just don't be douchebag and don't be retarded, and you won't rape. Simple.

9 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

If you want to really have great sex with her you anyway will need a high degree of intimacy and attunement to her needs and wants.

Right. But this is more of a relationship thing. If it's just a quick hookup and girl is horny af, she ussually just wants you to f her hard, expecting you know what you're doing. Not asking like a clueless boy.

18 minutes ago, mivafofa said:

What fascinates me is the extend on how too many men would project their desire onto the woman to the point they actuallly think the woman want it too. So then all her "No 😅" or "No :(" really look like a "No~😋😘😍" to him. 

Nice way to not adress my point at all. Which is pretty common for you anyways.

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@Peter Miklis I wanted to share my fascination on the matter, just like you.  @Shin already addressed your points. I quoted him. 

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22 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

Right. But this is more of a relationship thing. If it's just a quick hookup and girl is horny af, she ussually just wants you to f her hard, expecting you know what you're doing. Not asking like a clueless boy.

In this case there are no difficulties. If she's horny and you can read it -> she's consenting.


Association with the wise is the root cause for obliterating all misery. -  Tripura Rahasya

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Posted (edited)

Omg!  Men are truly delusional when it comes to this subject, I swear!  If she gives you a certain look then you will read that as she's consenting.  She's winking:  omg she's consenting!  But she could just as well have gotten some eye makeup in her eye and she's trying to blink it out.   Men, I know your brain wiring and hormones lead you in the direction of concluding a woman wants sex no matter  how little evidence there may be.  If only there were some dating advice out there that convinces males that at best only about 25% of women they meet may be thinking sex in the very short amount of time it takes men to come to that conclusion.

Then once a man concludes he has a good chance of extracting sex from the woman, he goes on to delusionally take any cue she gives as a positive sign she would be okay with it, when in fact it is only after the man starts to pressure her mentally and/or physically that the idea even enters her mind.  The comedian who mimicked a woman giving mixed signals is not even aware he is just as delusional in his assumptions.  The woman now realizes what he has on his mind and begins to register her doubts about his advances having any success.   She mildly protests at first but because women are socialized not to be aggressive, she will keep it mild until the male becomes too forceful.  Meanwhile each time she doesn't raise her voice and, in our eyes, act aggressively enough to put it quite plainly in clear words, the male assumes out of his delusion that she is green lighting him. 
That is so often not the case.  But when she finally panics and raises her voice holding up a hand, the man will think he's been played.  Dating sites even encourage men to ignore the woman's negative signals.  It's all a communications game.  I would like to know what men think is adequate negative vibes for them to pick up on it.

Edited by Eternity

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2 minutes ago, Lucas-fgm said:

Good point. But women should learn to be more clear about their intentions from the start.

The same way men should learn to read body language, instead of being so focused on words and what they are supposed to mean.

Both, idealistically should learn how to speak the other gender language better for sure,

Cause even if for example a man is super good at reading body language and other implicit ways women speak, at some point he won't because he truly won't know (tired, specific situations etc.), or be annoyed by it, cause let's face it, sometimes it's just too much and too often.

 


Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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@Shin you have to realize that some women are not really interested in a guy but still play along and lead him on. 

That kind of behavior can confuse men. 

Tbh that is unfair behavior coming from some types of women 

 

 


 INTP loner... .shy girl.. 

Quick access to journal entries

 

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