Disconnected from higher self

[tatsumaru]

I feel like I am disconnected from my higher self. The insights are only dripping excruciatingly slowly and my sense of purpose is dwindling.
I am constantly changing goals and my confidence in what I want to do with my life is almost non-existent.
I just want to connect with my higher self at full bandwidth and express that into this dimension - WHAT IS BLOCKING ME???

I lack conviction, purpose, passion and instead I spend my days in apathy, boredom, doubt and waiting to die.
I am tired of watching TV shows, doing meaningless soul-sucking jobs and uncertainty. I say 15 years is enough!

Where did my self go? What is this empty shell that I am? Where is my essence?
I need it badly.

[Recursoinominado]

Well, when you DO receive insights, you ACT on them or you just collect them and put them in a mental drawer?

In most cases, you don't need more insights, but to act on those you already have. 

[aurum]

5 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

WHAT IS BLOCKING ME???

You tell us.

Consider for a moment that while a part of you does want all the things you mentioned, another (perhaps unconscious) part of you does not.

Consider that your life is exactly how you want it to be.

So ask yourself: what is the benefit I get from staying stuck?

[tatsumaru]

  

9 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

Well, when you DO receive insights, you ACT on them or you just collect them and put them in a mental drawer?

In most cases, you don't need more insights, but to act on those you already have. 

Hmm, I feel like I integrate any insights that I download immediately. I am not always aware of ways to express those insights however. For example let's say I was taught by the cosmos that people are unique and relationship are not a number's game and it's about finding the right partner that together your relationship results in a harmonious frequency. It's not about marriage or fighting for your marriage or compromising or any of that garbage. Ok great - so I figured this out and ceased a relationship with a partner that wasn't harmonious for me and was pulling my frequency to lower levels (SD: from yellow to blue) - insight applied. Now what? How do we find the right partner? I already figured out it's not a number's game so that means it's not about brute force either - aka I shouldn't be seeking randomly on the off-chance that it happens somewhere - there should be some sort of guiding intuition that aids you and navigates you in life so that you don't have to waste your time with meaningless experiments? Where is this intuition? Where is this guide?
 

8 hours ago, aurum said:

You tell us.

Consider for a moment that while a part of you does want all the things you mentioned, another (perhaps unconscious) part of you does not.

Consider that your life is exactly how you want it to be.

So ask yourself: what is the benefit I get from staying stuck?

Man I've been stuck in this rut for many years now, all I dream about is transformation and change. I am not sure if there's anything at all that I want to keep from my current life. The only thing I like from my life are the brief moments of cosmic insights that I get on very rare occasion.

[electroBeam]

15 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

WHAT IS BLOCKING ME???

⬇️

15 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

I lack conviction, purpose, passion and instead I spend my days in apathy, boredom, doubt and waiting to die.

 

The feeling of the 'block' is the block. Let that negative feeling go.

15 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

I feel like I am disconnected from my higher self.

I doubt you feel that way because you are actually disconnected from your higher self, rather the negative feeling is actually telling you to let the thought "I am disconnected from my higher self" go instead.

15 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

The insights are only dripping excruciatingly slowly and my sense of purpose is dwindling.

The insights are literally feeling good you just add mundane content onto them to make it seem like you're gaining knowledge, when actually you aren't, because there's actually no knowledge to gain. Lack of insight = lack of feeling good. Lack of feeling good = lack of letting go of limiting beliefs.

 

Edited November 1, 2020 by electroBeam

[Recursoinominado]

23 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

I already figured out it's not a number's game so that means it's not about brute force either - aka I shouldn't be seeking randomly on the off-chance that it happens somewhere

Well, this is not entirely true. You do have to expose yourself to the largest number of girls(?) possible like a sales funnel and filter the ones who are compatible along the way until you find one (or more) that is perfect for you. 

It is brute force + playing smart.

You do have to approach as much as possible + develop the skills to attract AND keep (those are not necessarily the same skills).

 

27 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

there should be some sort of guiding intuition that aids you and navigates you in life so that you don't have to waste your time with meaningless experiments? Where is this intuition? Where is this guide?

Who said that? Don't try to bypass life, what you call meaningless experiments could be the answer to your question. It could be exactly what you need, direct experience is KING. 

It seems to me that you are trying to gather insights without the experience, only in an intellectual level, which isn't possible.

I would bet you already know what you should do, but you just didn't like it. 

[Shunyata]

I think Shunyamurti gave an excellent answer to this. But I don't remeber which video though. Check all of his teachings out. The more the better. They are priceless and available for free on YouTube.

[Waken]

I've been saying a lot of the same thing on this forum, and sometimes I hope I don't bore the shit out of people with it. But I'm all for Bashars recommendation/insight to follow your excitement/passion/joy every moment as best you can (https://bashar.org/handouts/TheFormula.pdf). I get the idea that when you speak of your purpose in life you're having the idea that it should be perhaps like a big project or so. However Bashars suggestion is that you're following your life purpose when you're acting on whatever excites you most in any moment. The higher mind is helping/communicating/guiding you, through your sense of excitement/passion. I've been asking myself the question 'what would I love to do most now?' and go do that.  If you start out with this now, and you're in a low state as you say you are, you maybe won't come up with something that feels very exciting, passionate or joyous, but seems only a little better than the other options. It doesn't matter, do it, and the ball with get rolling more and more quite quickly. That acting on your excitement is the life purpose Bashar would say. It will lead to wherever you need to be, whatever you need to do, whoever you need to meet, etc in the most fulfilling and pleasant way. I find this method by far the best thing I have ever adopted (as far as my memory can tell).

[tatsumaru]

4 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

Well, this is not entirely true. You do have to expose yourself to the largest number of girls(?) possible like a sales funnel and filter the ones who are compatible along the way until you find one (or more) that is perfect for you. 

It is brute force + playing smart.

You do have to approach as much as possible + develop the skills to attract AND keep (those are not necessarily the same skills).

I don't agree with that at all. That's just low-consciousness PUA thinking. You don't need to develop anything - attraction is not a choice. You can't learn who you are you can only remove what's blocking you from expressing it. Everything is connected and is whole, therefore brute forcing is a symptom of unconsciousness.

4 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

Who said that? Don't try to bypass life, what you call meaningless experiments could be the answer to your question. It could be exactly what you need, direct experience is KING. 

It seems to me that you are trying to gather insights without the experience, only in an intellectual level, which isn't possible.

I would bet you already know what you should do, but you just didn't like it. 

Just because I haven't found the most natural way of identifying where the perfect partner is located doesn't mean life is brute force. It seems to me that you are too identified with that "going out of your comfort zone" rah-rah stuff. "Any experience" is not equal to "direct experience" so please don't encourage a casino lifestyle.

3 hours ago, Waken said:

I've been saying a lot of the same thing on this forum, and sometimes I hope I don't bore the shit out of people with it. But I'm all for Bashars recommendation/insight to follow your excitement/passion/joy every moment as best you can (https://bashar.org/handouts/TheFormula.pdf). I get the idea that when you speak of your purpose in life you're having the idea that it should be perhaps like a big project or so. However Bashars suggestion is that you're following your life purpose when you're acting on whatever excites you most in any moment. The higher mind is helping/communicating/guiding you, through your sense of excitement/passion. I've been asking myself the question 'what would I love to do most now?' and go do that.  If you start out with this now, and you're in a low state as you say you are, you maybe won't come up with something that feels very exciting, passionate or joyous, but seems only a little better than the other options. It doesn't matter, do it, and the ball with get rolling more and more quite quickly. That acting on your excitement is the life purpose Bashar would say. It will lead to wherever you need to be, whatever you need to do, whoever you need to meet, etc in the most fulfilling and pleasant way. I find this method by far the best thing I have ever adopted (as far as my memory can tell).

There's a lot of truth to that and I have already been paying close attention to what excites me but I am not sure if it not being a career or a big project is fine. That implies that your career could be something that doesn't excite you (possible but not a life worth living) or somehow discounts the fact that you need resources to survive. So maybe I want to go and read Leonardo Da Vinci's biography now but tomorrow I need to go back to my meaningless job and do that for 50 hours so I can get another couple of hours to read my book? No - unless my career is what I want to do then life will pass me by, 70 years will be over soon, and little to nothing will be uncovered.

[AtheisticNonduality]

This could help.

[Recursoinominado]

17 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

You don't need to develop anything - attraction is not a choice.

You can certainly develop A LOT. 

18 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

You can't learn who you are you can only remove what's blocking you from expressing it.

It isn't enough to "be who you are", you have to meet a LOT of women to 1. know what kind you really like 2. get good with women 3. have options and choose the best one. It is better to choose 1 out of 100 than it is to choose 1 out of 2.

To get good with women, you have to interact a LOT with lots of women.

24 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

That's just low-consciousness PUA thinking.

That's just ignorance.

24 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

Everything is connected and is whole, therefore brute forcing is a symptom of unconsciousness.

Whaaat hahahahaha go tell Buddha to chill with all that spirituality search, that's just unconsciousness bro, you don't need to work hard, we are ONE S2

27 minutes ago, tatsumaru said:

Just because I haven't found the most natural way of identifying where the perfect partner is located doesn't mean life is brute force. It seems to me that you are too identified with that "going out of your comfort zone" rah-rah stuff. "Any experience" is not equal to "direct experience" so please don't encourage a casino lifestyle.

Good fucking luck sitting at home waiting for the perfect partner to fall on your lap.

No wonder you feel disconnected from your higher self, it is screaming for you to act and you are just too deaf to hear.

Seems to me that you are distorting spiritual wisdom to suit your lazy fearful ego needs. 

[aurum]

6 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

Man I've been stuck in this rut for many years now, all I dream about is transformation and change. I am not sure if there's anything at all that I want to keep from my current life.

I get it and I've definitely been there. Indeed, it is likely time for you to shed some old patterns if you feel this way. As we grow, the patterns that previously kept us safe begin to feel like a shell we are desperate to break out of. Or like anchors holding us back.

But I promise you that if you were conscious of how all your programming work, you'd realize that you life is just that. A sum total of all your programming.

So keep introspecting. You said you are constantly changing your goals, so start there.

What is the payoff you get for constantly switching your goals?

Perhaps it's that by switching your goals, you don't have to commit to anything. And by not committing to anything, you don't have to risk making a wrong  choice.

And wrong choice would feel like shame and guilt. Maybe when you were a child, you were punished very badly for making wrong choices.

So maybe it's better to make no decision at all.

See how I did that?

What might seem like insanity (constantly changing your goals) actually makes a lot of sense if you dig deep enough.

And I'm not saying that example is your pattern. Your pattern might be something different. I'm saying to use the example I gave and do your own introspection.

[Seraphim]

I read a book about intuition. The experts who were interviewed very rarely received strong intuitions. And for example when Dalai Lama gets an intuition he doesn't just act on it, he also asks other people and consults his oracle. I only know one person who has a strong enough intuition to be able to follow it always, and he is basically an enlightened avatar with insane powers. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's probably a good idea to do what Waken wrote and follow your joy, try to find out what job and lifestyle would work for you.

 

[AtheisticNonduality]

Thee Temple strives to end personal laziness And engender discipline. To focus Thee Will on one's true desires, in thee belief, Gathered from experience, that this maximizes and makes happen All those things that one wants In Every Area Of Life. Explore daily your deepest desires, fantasies and motives, Gradually focusing on what you REALLY would like to happen In a "Perfect World", a "Perfect Situation", Taking away ALL restrictions and "practical" considerations; What you'd REALLY want. Then decide to try and do it. Thee mere visualization of that true goal, begins Thee Process that makes it happen. Clean out thee trappings and debris ov compromise, Ov what you've been told is "reasonable" for a person in your circumstances. Be clear in admitting your REAL Desires. Discard ALL irrelevancies. Ask yourself who you want as friends, If you need or WANT to work, What you want to eat; Check and re-check EVERYTHING Deeper and deeper, more and more precisely To get closer to and ultimately integrate with, your Real SELF. Once you are focused on yourself internally, Thee external aspects ov your Life will fall into place: THEY HAVE TO! Skeptics will say they simply don't believe this Psychick Process works... But it does. IT IS THEE KEY TO THEE TEMPLE!

[tatsumaru]

6 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

You can certainly develop A LOT. 

It isn't enough to "be who you are", you have to meet a LOT of women to 1. know what kind you really like 2. get good with women 3. have options and choose the best one. It is better to choose 1 out of 100 than it is to choose 1 out of 2.

To get good with women, you have to interact a LOT with lots of women.

That's just ignorance.

Whaaat hahahahaha go tell Buddha to chill with all that spirituality search, that's just unconsciousness bro, you don't need to work hard, we are ONE S2

Good fucking luck sitting at home waiting for the perfect partner to fall on your lap.

No wonder you feel disconnected from your higher self, it is screaming for you to act and you are just too deaf to hear.

Seems to me that you are distorting spiritual wisdom to suit your lazy fearful ego needs. 

This is going to be my last reply to you because this is clearly red/blue level thinking, and I am not interested in investing energy in this direction. You seem to be very invested in the whole notion of effort/brute forcing/"elbow grease"/self-development possibly due to sunk cost and an identity has developed around all those concepts. Effort is simply a measure of ignorance.

The fact that you are relying on straw men arguments (i.e. "Good luck sitting at home waiting" when no such thing was suggested or implied) only proves that you are not here to help, but instead to promote your identity, which as I said is not yet interesting to me. Maybe in another life, until then keep up the hard work.
 

6 hours ago, aurum said:

I get it and I've definitely been there. Indeed, it is likely time for you to shed some old patterns if you feel this way. As we grow, the patterns that previously kept us safe begin to feel like a shell we are desperate to break out of. Or like anchors holding us back.

But I promise you that if you were conscious of how all your programming work, you'd realize that you life is just that. A sum total of all your programming.

So keep introspecting. You said you are constantly changing your goals, so start there.

What is the payoff you get for constantly switching your goals?

Perhaps it's that by switching your goals, you don't have to commit to anything. And by not committing to anything, you don't have to risk making a wrong  choice.

And wrong choice would feel like shame and guilt. Maybe when you were a child, you were punished very badly for making wrong choices.

So maybe it's better to make no decision at all.

See how I did that?

What might seem like insanity (constantly changing your goals) actually makes a lot of sense if you dig deep enough.

And I'm not saying that example is your pattern. Your pattern might be something different. I'm saying to use the example I gave and do your own introspection.

Yes, I've thought about that a lot. I guess I just have a ton of ideas and I don't know which one to pick. They all seem equally important to me and I would like to experience all of them, so I bounce back and forth. It's not so much about making mistakes - that is fine - what bothers me most is not picking the optimal route and losing tempo because of it.
 

6 hours ago, Seraphim said:

I read a book about intuition. The experts who were interviewed very rarely received strong intuitions. And for example when Dalai Lama gets an intuition he doesn't just act on it, he also asks other people and consults his oracle. I only know one person who has a strong enough intuition to be able to follow it always, and he is basically an enlightened avatar with insane powers. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's probably a good idea to do what Waken wrote and follow your joy, try to find out what job and lifestyle would work for you.

Keep in mind that the Dalai Lama (according to his own words) is not enlightened nor has a wish to be. Also I bet his oracle relies pretty heavily on his intuition. Yes, what Waken wrote was helpful, one of my spiritual mentors back in the days has suggested the same quote from Bashar to me. I certainly trust excitement and joy as a compass in life. My apathy is born of not knowing which joy to follow rather than not having any joys to follow.

 

[Recursoinominado]

Edited November 1, 2020 by Recursoinominado

[susanyzm]

There's a small technique you could try. It works for me：

Open the chakra between the eye brows. This chakra is the channel to the higher self. You'll feel guided and assured when it is open.

Tilt your head upward when you meditate. This will automatically shift your focus to this chakra. 

Also, I feel that my eye brows are very tight. Even when I feel generally relaxed, it's still very tight. I have to consciously relax it. 

This could be quite a direct way to re-connect with your higher self, skipping the complicated arguments in the head. Good luck!

[cuteguy]

Dude, just trip! You can connect to your higher self for a few bucks. Sounds too good to be true, but it is true.

[Gesundheit]

What do you mean by higher self? Is it a feeling? A state of being? What is it?

[Waken]

18 hours ago, tatsumaru said:

There's a lot of truth to that and I have already been paying close attention to what excites me but I am not sure if it not being a career or a big project is fine. That implies that your career could be something that doesn't excite you (possible but not a life worth living) or somehow discounts the fact that you need resources to survive. So maybe I want to go and read Leonardo Da Vinci's biography now but tomorrow I need to go back to my meaningless job and do that for 50 hours so I can get another couple of hours to read my book? No - unless my career is what I want to do then life will pass me by, 70 years will be over soon, and little to nothing will be uncovered.

Yes of course. But the point is as explained by Bashar is that the principle is that what you put out, you get back and life will support and reflect you your beliefs and intentions. So if you act on your excitement, life will give you more of that and also support you in doing what excites you. Bashar likes to call the following your excitement thing 'the complete kitt' or something along those lines, because it is a complete 'method' on its own. So let's say you want to read Leonardo's biography now, perhaps when you finish it you come across something else of him (or someone else, etc) that excites you, and then something else. Before you know it you might get excited to write your discoveries about Leonardo and some other guys on Facebook, then someone contacts you and you discuss and blahblah you get very excited about putting your discoveries on a website which end up paying your bills. Then you might start following another excitement of yours, and on you go. Your life can't pass you by doing that. Because when you say 'life has passed me by, by following my excitement', you're kind of saying that your excitements weren't fulfilled by acting on your excitement. Which is by definition impossible using this method. Not acting on your excitement/joy/passion is how life passes you by. The thing is, is that if you really feel doubtful about whatever your excitement can support you now, it is better to keep doing what you think you need to do to support you in paying the bill or whatever, until you get confident by experience that your excitement can and does support you. I'll tell you that I've never been better as far as I remember since when I seriously started implementing this method, and I've tried a good number of things before lol. I saw you wrote that your apathy was born because you didn't know what joy to follow. It's simple, it's the one that even contains just a very little bit more joy/bliss/passion/excitement than another option. For me that was a couple of hours ago taking a walk, then doing some mantra exercises, then replying this message, etc.

Sorry if writing to much, I love this method/insight as it just makes everything good and feel like sharing it much.

Edited November 2, 2020 by Waken