Trip Insights with 5-MeO

[Arthur]

Dear Actualizers,

I would like to share some of the insights I got while having my first experience of the psychedelic 5-MeO-DMT.
(Apologise for badly written English)

I did not experience a breakthrough, physical death or the Absolute. You won’t find information on those topics here. However, I still got some interesting insights about reality.

I won’t post my dosages, since every person’s dose will vary with the purity of the substance, method of administration and body tolerance. Start small and increment the doses with consecutive trips.

I’ve done 3 trips so far. Each one presented me with a different insight.

Before the peak

After about 5 to 10 minutes of taking the substance (not when smoking), the first affects started to occur. Heart rate increased, slight shivering, nausea, slight burning sensation in the chest and feeling of tension in the forehead. These might sound terrible, but they were not that bad and I was just able to relax into it despite discomfort. The visual field became kind of fuzzy as well, everything was still there, but it felt like looking into a curved mirror. My motor functions were fine - I could walk and grab things fine. But in general I had a slight buzz, similar to when you have maybe a beer or two.

Peak Insights

After about 15-20 minutes, all previously mentioned feelings completely faded away and I entered incredible state of consciousness. My awareness got multiplied by 1000, like I’ve been meditating since birth. No other non-psychedelic substance ever came close to this. It’s really indescribable state that needs to be experienced. In that state, I got hit by three facets of reality:

1.       First trip showed me that everything we experience is there because of Love. I came to the trip expecting something massive, something huge and scary, but it was none of that. It was a very gentle, very personal and warm feeling of Love. Not romantic love or love of you family, it was much a deeper feeling - Love for reality. This love was so strong, that it allowed Everything to exist. You can do anything to it, stab it, cut it, spit on it, and it will still love you. You can manipulate, delude yourself, tell lies and it didn’t matter. This love doesn’t judge, doesn’t moralize and doesn’t separate. Honestly It felt like I got caught with my pants down, and this love was looking my whole life saying “its ok”… I cried my ass out for a good 10 minutes. I realized that me, and everybody else, forgot this feeling of Love. This Love was manifesting itself in every perception. I looked at a bucket next to me and busted into tears. Everybody forgot that they are here to experience Anything they want. I thought to myself “wow, how beautiful this reality is compared to non-existence”. I knew that I will forget this experience, and that everybody forgot how magical, beautiful and Loving reality is.

2.       Second trip showed me the Omnipresence of perception. For this one, I laid down on my couch with meditative music playing softly on my phone in the background. I was able to experience that the sound was not coming from the phone, but just appeared in my awareness out of no-where. In fact, all of my perceptions and sensations appeared by themselves, for themselves. It felt that thinking about perception coming from an object is ridiculous. Yes you can say that the membrane in the speaker vibrate, producing air waves that travel to my ear. But that really doesn’t say anything. It is a conceptual idea, which is very different from the experience of the music itself. Concept has an experience of its own, and experience of the music has a life of its own. It is not far or close, loud or quiet, left or right. It’s just a perception by itself. When I start conceptualizing about it - I lose the experience of it and switch to the experience of conceptualizing.

3.       Third trip was about the nature of Experience and Awareness. Everything became quiet and my brain entered a supercharged mode. Thoughts were flying around like clouds in a time-lapse video. It hit me out of the blue, that everything in existence is an experience happening in the present moment. It’s really all it is… When I think about the past, I have an experience of a thought of a past. The past doesn’t exist as its own entity. I realized what Awareness is the occurrence of all the experiences in the present. Awareness gives the experience a ground. It shapes it and makes it real. I understood that Awareness was not separate from experience. I couldn’t point to Awareness, because everywhere is only experience. I though “What does that say about me then?”. Well when I feel something, there is just the experience of it by itself. When I’m sad – that’s the experience of sadness, when I’m thinking – that’s the experience of human thought, when I go to the washroom – that’s the experience of it. There is only the collection of experiences happening right now, the rest is a concept (which is also a type of experience). For example, imagine there is a closed box with an object inside. You look at it and you don’t know what’s inside, you just have the experience of the box. When you look inside and find the object, you might think “oh this object was inside all this time”. But that’s not the true. There was no object inside, only the experience of a closed box. When you opened it, now you have the experience of what’s inside. And when you think that it was there all along – you have that experience in the present moment! It wasn’t there before, there is no before… That leaves the Self, as just this bundle of perceptions and experiences – Awareness.

After the peak

After each peak, came a state of full blissfulness and peace. I felt like I can stay in this place forever. I thought of walking around with IV fluid drip of 5-Meo-DMT Not surprisingly though, my Ego crept in on me. And I even experienced an Ego backlash with some of my low consciousness activities. But for the rest of the day, I was able to observe my ego, allowed it to be and sort of distance myself. I stayed in a very meditative state until the next day.

Overall, the experiences were very profound for me. I kind of set the stage for them with couple of years of meditation, sprinkle of contemplation and reading a little bit of Ralston’s works. But I never truly contemplated the nature of those insights. They came out of no-where. Those insights were very deep, and it will take me years to fully understand them. I think those insights has to penetrate into my machine-like subconscious mind to truly make a shift in perspective.

The experience felt very personal and intimate to me. I’m only sharing this here because I feel like 5-MeO have a bad reputation for deeply traumatizing people. I want to show that it might not always be the case.

I will continue experimenting in the future and hopefully experience a breakthrough.

I want to express my gratitude to Leo for introducing me to 5-MeO @Leo Gura. This substance is no drug! it is consciousness in chemical form. I’ve experienced a massive growth probably equal to few years of strict meditation & contemplation. Thank you Leo! (You’ve changed my life a couple of times by now  )

Thanks everybody for support!

Edited October 1, 2018 by Arthur
typos

[SoonHei]

@Arthur wow thanks for sharing

 

The Life happening is the NOW is a very good insight. It's so deep when it happens in that moment

I've had those moments but yes, the ego does crawl back in.

It's amazing though.

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, Arthur said:

When I start conceptualizing about it - I lose the experience of it and switch to the experience of conceptualizing

That is the game right there! ?

Thanks for sharing! ♥️?

[outlandish]

Nice report Arthur!

I think it's a good idea to post your ROA and dosage, despite the fact that like you said it will vary between individuals. It can give others a ballpark to work from, with that caveat in mind. It can also illustrate the range of this variability when many people post their varying dosages and ROAs.

 

[Leo Gura]

@Arthur Good!

Wait till you up the dose and get skullfucked by God's infinity

 

[Arthur]

@outlandish 

I didn't want to share my dosages because they were much higher than the general trend, and produced lesser results for me. Which makes me think that either my substance is not pure, i'm losing most of it during administration or some strange body tolerance.

But if you are curious, the trips happen 3 days in a row, here are the dosages:

First trip was 18mg with nasal snorting as RoA.

Second trip was 34mg snorted.

Third trip i did something stupid that I DO NOT recommend. First I used 31mg with rectal administration, aka plugging. When I was coming to the peak (after about 15 min) ,I felt frustrated with not getting a breakthrough so I snorted another 21mg. Which just prolonged the peak and didn't gave me a breakthrough anyway. I was only confident in doing so because I knew the affects of this specific substance on my body.

From now on, I will stick to just plugging and increase the dose gradually, snorting makes me nauseous and I'm left with dry nose and slight nose bleed the day after.

 

Edited October 1, 2018 by Arthur

[Leo Gura]

@Arthur Be patient. You will get your breakthrough.

Each trip builds on the previous.

Dosage is not the most important factor.

To get the deepest insights you need to hone a strong intent and practice contemplation seriously.

And if that fails, vaporization should do the trick. It will hit hard and fast, so start low.

[Arthur]

@Leo Gura You are right, I was rushing and didn't appreciate the dept of each insight.

I was doing so because I only have a small window  to experiment with psychedelics right now, before I get soaked into the business of life.

From now on I will slow down and be more prepared for next time.

I'll look into HCL to freebase conversion as well.

[Leo Gura]

@Arthur You can vaporize HCl by putting it on a neutral herb substance, like mullein leaf.

[Arthur]

@Leo Gura oh sweet!

should I get one of these Ascent Vaporizers then?

Edited October 1, 2018 by Arthur

[Leo Gura]

@Arthur I have no idea about Ascent vaporizors.

[nowimhere]

@Arthur I have had good success vaporizing by using a regular glass pipe. What you do is smoke some mullein leaf first to build a nice ash base. Then you put a fresh layer of mullein down, enough to cover the whole bowl. Then you put the 5 MEO on top, preferably in the middle, then you put a small layer of mullein on top of that, to cover the 5 MEO as you don't want the flames to directly come into contact with it. All 4 times that I've done it now I've succeeded. The idea is you want to "sandwich" the 5 MEO with mullein so when you burn it, it cherries around it. That will be enough to vaporise it and get the effects. Which will come fast as a freight train. So if you are tripping by yourself what I've done the last two times is have a town wrapped up on my bed like a coiled snake so you can put your pipe in the center of the coil after you take your hit. Then you just lie down and enjoy infinity and beyond.  

[allislove]

The problem with vaporizing is that: you can't keep your eyes opened, so you won't connect the experience to environment, which is beneficial, I guess. 

[nowimhere]

@dimitri The first couple of times... Yes. It was hard to keep my eyes open.

The last couple of times... No. I was able to keep my eyes open.

I just set a strong intention to keep them open. 

[ZenSwift]

@Arthur Really great share, thankyou!

[OBEler]

@Arthur I thank you very much for your Trip reports! Great deep insights although you did not have a breakthrough. 

Were you meditation with Eyes opened or closed?