How to deal with the suffering of others? Do i need to be enlightened?

[Recursoinominado]

Let's say that all you see in the world is the suffering of others (all beings), you are HIGHLY empathetic  and you see that this suffering is never ending and probably will only get worse, especially close beloved beings like your mother or son, you see AND feel (empaths) what they feel and with it all their suffering and insecurities and you try everything but just seems inevitable that they will not hear you and keep doing what they are doing that is dragging them slowly and steadily into a hellish life until their death. Their happiness is yours and also their suffering that happens to be the 90%.

How do you deal with this fact without closing the heart? Do i need to experience enlightenment to see that it "is all perfect"? 
I understand that it is all an illusion and that you need "suffering" to have "bliss" but i don't feel it and neither the unaware people feel like it is an illusion, they are really suffering and you feel all of it. 
I find it really hard to cope with it. Makes me isolate myself in order to escape feeling others since it so overwhelming. Especially because i am getting more and more sensitive to energies each day and feel them intensely.

[dorg]

@Recursoinominado I am not clear on whose suffering you are primarily concerned about - yours or others. And is there really any difference?

Look at suffering & what causes suffering.  Isn't it thought? Your own thought?

Edited August 26, 2018 by dorg

[Nahm]

@Recursoinominado 

What if you’re behind what you’re experiencing? What if it’s your perspective, your thoughts, behind your suffering? 

What if you realized this, and helped other people realize this?

Ah, but there is uniqueness being an empath.

[Arkandeus]

suffering is real

do not hold a belief that suffering will lead to bliss

if you believe you need to travel a hundred miles to get to heaven, you will be travelling a hundred miles to heaven, every moment again and again, for infinity, your beliefs form the present moment

believe in bliss, absolute bliss with no requisites, no bridge, no way, no journey, just being here where you want to be

 

when faced with the suffering of others it is important to know that suffering has no cause in reality

it is an expression of energy which expresses itself through the canvas of physical reality

there is no reason tor suffering

there is no reason for happiness, happiness is our true nature

 

when you someone suffering, believe in their happiness, believe in the reality where they are happy

your imagination, your belief, your intent for happiness for this person is true universal energy which help that person structure their reality on an atomic level, to create that reality which matches our true happy nature

you needn't even to speak to someone,you don't even have to comfort them, you don't have to give platitudes, you can if you want to, but it is not required, there is not a single physical action that will adress the true cause

it is all about belief, your belief in the happiness of your loved ones is what truly shapes reality, from its very origine, from outside and inside, what you believe and intent, look at that reality where your loved ones are happy

look with your belief and intention

Edited August 26, 2018 by Arkandeus

[Recursoinominado]

6 minutes ago, dorg said:

@Recursoinominado I am not clear on whose suffering you are primarily concerned about - yours or others. And is there really any difference?

Look at suffering & what causes suffering.  Isn't it thought? Your own thought?

Doesn't make any difference, its all connected, right know i can't be happy while next to someone that is suffering. And it's not the case that it's just my thoughts, they are really suffering in living a hellish life. 

[dorg]

4 minutes ago, Recursoinominado said:

Doesn't make any difference, its all connected, right know i can't be happy while next to someone that is suffering. And it's not the case that it's just my thoughts, they are really suffering in living a hellish life. 

I am not, and was not, denying that.

Edited August 26, 2018 by dorg

[Recursoinominado]

6 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@Recursoinominado 

What if you’re behind what you’re experiencing? What if it’s your perspective, your thoughts, behind your suffering? 

What if you realized this, and helped other people realize this?

Ah, but there is uniqueness being an empath.

What if you can't help other people realize this? What if you KNOW they are suffering and isn't going to get better? 
Being empath isn't that unique 

[Nahm]

@Recursoinominado 

‘Be the change you wish to see in the word’

-Leo Gura

 

[Recursoinominado]

10 minutes ago, Feel Good said:

Denial isn't an option. Saying that it's all you is denial. 

Look, something I've been experimenting with is observing resistance. 

My mind knows what it knows. It records things to the most pinpoint of accuracy. But it also has this tendency to resist what is, and it's that resistance that creates pain. 

So don't deny what is happening, just observe how youre mind resist what's happening

That way you can make accurate judgements and still empathise with what is happening.

You can help people and yourself out of a mess if you admit there is a mess. If you deny it you can't do anything about it. 

 

That's my advice. 
 

 

4

"It is all perfect" isn't denial, it's one perspective (or dimension) and doesn't exclude the previous ones. Bodhisattva see that it's all perfect, see behind the veil but they also recognize that there is suffering in another perspective or dimension so they try to help anyway. Like Buddha that served people all his life after enlightenment but surely knew that it was pointless in some perspective.

[Recursoinominado]

1 minute ago, Nahm said:

@Recursoinominado 

‘Be the change you wish to see in the word’

-Leo Gura

 

What are you saying? I should see past my suffering (that it's also others suffering) first (aka enlightenment)? Can one be separate from the other? 

[Recursoinominado]

Just now, Feel Good said:

Are you a bodhisattva? 

What are your point? If i am not one, i shouldn't listen to what they say? That wouldn't be denial?

[dorg]

11 minutes ago, Feel Good said:

That's what you're being sold here on this thread by others. It's denial. 

Could you clarify this please? I can't find anyone on this thread "selling denial"

Edited August 26, 2018 by dorg

[Recursoinominado]

18 minutes ago, Feel Good said:

@Recursoinominado

Why can't you just be yourself and watch how you create your suffering in relation to others suffering?

Why do you need to become a bodhisattva?

Whats wrong with enjoying humanity as it is, for what it is, rather than trying to run away from it with new age 3rd eye teaching? 

That's what you're being sold here on this thread by others. It's denial. 

"If I can't see it in my direct experience it doesn't exist"

You want to become a zombie who lives in a bubble?

New age narcissism isn't an answer. 

The suffering of other IS my direct experience. Shouldn't I believe in my direct experience?

[Ananta]

@Recursoinominado If you're truly an empath, then  you need to learn how to ground yourself,  by using grounding techniques. You can look them up on google there are many sites on how to do this.

Otherwise, the more one identifies with themselves as a suffering someone, the more they will suffer. Unfortunately there's not much you can do for them. Unless they are willing to help themselves. It depends on the situation. People have to go through trials and tribulations in life, you can't save everyone, unfortunately.

 

[AlwaysBeNice]

Don't take on more than you can serve, how will worrying help anyone?

What is your problem? Be only focused on that. Are you not always afraid of stillness, hiding that by constantly making up conceptual mind problems, like the people you are complaining about?

Also, it's not bliss vs pain, it's pleasure vs. pain, and bliss is the liberation from the idea you need to get pleasure and avoid pain.

Babies are not perpetually unhappy, animals aren't, children aren't, masters aren't, just stupid indoctrinated humans are, and because of their stubborn misguided use of imagination.

[cetus]

@Recursoinominado "You can only watch the events happen. You can't use consciousness to do or undo anything."  

Just read that than saw your post. Seemed appropriate to share.

[Nahm]

@Recursoinominado

You can eliminate the falsities, the other than direct experience, the difference between thoughts, beliefs, awareness, etc resolving your own suffering and conversely see the ‘suffering’ constructed a you to own it - and then share that with others. You could knock it out in a day with a pen & paper and no distraction, and no deviation from the topic of inquiry - you.  Falsity isn’t in awareness so to speak, it’s in thought - in ‘relativity’, always things (thoughts) have been added, assumptions, but anything added can be realized to have been added. There’s duality in empathy & apathy, and a pendulum, but the whole ‘process’ can be sped up, by realizing the whole.

 

 

[tsuki]

10 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

you try everything but just seems inevitable that they will not hear you and keep doing what they are doing that is dragging them slowly and steadily into a hellish life until their death. Their happiness is yours and also their suffering that happens to be the 90%.

Recognize that your understanding of what they are doing is not their understanding of what they are doing.
Instead of trying to correct their path, try to understand how they think that what they are doing is right.
Do that without the intent of disrupting their behavior and steering them in the 'right' direction.

10 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

I find it really hard to cope with it. Makes me isolate myself in order to escape feeling others since it so overwhelming. Especially because i am getting more and more sensitive to energies each day and feel them intensely.

You do not see 'others' suffer. You suffer for them.
You project your understanding of them into the future and experience that as suffering.
Own your suffering by recognizing its message. Find a way to make suffering necessary.
Do not avert your eyes away from it. Do not isolate yourself and do not try to minimize it by influencing others.
Both of these attitudes are ways to avert your gaze away from it.

Take it in and love it. In order to do that, you have to open your heart. Not close it.

[Recursoinominado]

14 hours ago, Anna1 said:

@Recursoinominado If you're truly an empath, then  you need to learn how to ground yourself,  by using grounding techniques. You can look them up on google there are many sites on how to do this.

Otherwise, the more one identifies with themselves as a suffering someone, the more they will suffer. Unfortunately there's not much you can do for them. Unless they are willing to help themselves. It depends on the situation. People have to go through trials and tribulations in life, you can't save everyone, unfortunately.

 

I really need to ground myself, any tips? I am making the effort to go to nature as much as possible and be barefoot on the ground. 

12 hours ago, AlwaysBeNice said:

Don't take on more than you can serve, how will worrying help anyone?

What is your problem? Be only focused on that. Are you not always afraid of stillness, hiding that by constantly making up conceptual mind problems, like the people you are complaining about?

Also, it's not bliss vs pain, it's pleasure vs. pain, and bliss is the liberation from the idea you need to get pleasure and avoid pain.

Babies are not perpetually unhappy, animals aren't, children aren't, masters aren't, just stupid indoctrinated humans are, and because of their stubborn misguided use of imagination.

Yeah, that's kind of sad. 

11 hours ago, cetus56 said:

@Recursoinominado "You can only watch the events happen. You can't use consciousness to do or undo anything."  

Just read that than saw your post. Seemed appropriate to share.

thank you, this will be my reminder. 

[SoonHei]

i think a lot of it might have to do with just the acceptance of the fact that YOU cannot change the way another's mind functions. trying to change it and failing can cause suffering

so by skipping this step. you can just accept their suffering? and be there for when they need you to be or if they ask, then give the advise..