Am I Finally Ready To Let Go of Dating?

[Natasha Tori Maru]

Perhaps it is a question of our ability to detect “higher consciousness” and what metrics we use to measure it against. As we develop, what we consider to be markers of higher consciousness can change. But how are we refining, learning and accumulating genuinely new methods of connecting relationally so that we can accurately assess “higher consciousness” in another person?

There is always a risk that we THINK we know what markers to look for when identifying elevated levels of consciousness. The filter itself can become the block. And the filter changes as we grow.

The problem is that the filter can become a fail mode: it can cause us to stop connecting with someone because they don't exhibit the particular markers we currently associate with higher consciousness.

You run the risk of the frame itself being flawed when the question is framed as higher/lower, because ego can obviously sneak in: “I am above.”

But that isn't the only possible block (that I am "above" and you are "below:). What we currently look for as markers of “higher consciousness” in another person might itself be outdated.

Perhaps @Miguel1 is growing out of previous filters and trying to learn a new way? It could be what he is looking for as a marker is wrong - not that he automatically thinks he is above.

My discernment may be flawed ≠ I am judging you as inferior

[questionreality]

16 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

My advice in this thread is not aimed at inexperienced guys but Miguel, who is over-experienced and looking for a higher stage.

What makes you think that it is a "higher" stage? Human beings are social creatures and he mentioned that he is an extrovert as well. Higher stage is building healthy, nourishing, fullfilling relationships imo, which is what he desires

[pablo_aka_god]

Why do you have such high expectations for the people you date?

I have lowered the bar for people I befriend or hook up with and I'm so much happier.

I am the one who cares about consciousness, I let other people live their lives and don't judge them.

Anecdotally, I had a close friend who has more conscious than avg and he was a PITA a lot of times, very boring and judgedamental guy. I stopped seeing him and replaced him w normies that make me laugh. I prefer a friend who makes me laugh than a know-it-all

Edited 26 minutes ago by pablo_aka_god

[Natasha Tori Maru]

19 minutes ago, pablo_aka_god said:

Why do you have such high expectations for the people you date?

I have lowered the bar for people I befriend or hook up with and I'm so much happier.

I am the one who cares about consciousness, I let other people live their lives and don't judge them.

Anecdotally, I had a close friend who has more conscious than avg and he was a PITA a lot of times, very boring and judgedamental guy. I stopped seeing him and replaced him w normies that make me laugh. I prefer a friend who makes me laugh than a know-it-all

I personally do not require all (or most) of my needs across domains to be met by one person.

I do not have to lower my standards per se. I spread them out within agreed upon relationship boundaries.

This can be an option, also.

For example, I do not seek necessarily to share my creative/artistic endeavours with my partner as a requirement. I have other networks of people for that need. It is nice when they are interested or want to engage, though!