girls don't like nice guys

[Miguel1]

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

that guy's advice in the video

Which video?

[Mellowmarsh]

Only women bleed. She is love. She carries you. You are lucky to have her.

 

If only you knew how much you are loved. 

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, Miguel1 said:

Which video?

Sorry, not video but that image:

 

[Miguel1]

27 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Sorry, not video but that image:

 

Okay, I can see how that’s the case for some people in this thread.

For me, I think it’s just cute. If a guy has been able to bag a mega superstar like Selena Gomez, surely he got swag and knows what he’s doing. At least to a degree.

For a healthy relationship, it is key to always keep in mind of little things to make the other person feel loved. That’s love.

[Jirh]

For reference, Selena Gomez has bipolar disorder. So she might enjoy the constant care and extra simping.

But normal girls don't really appreciate that. A man with a life centered around his purpose is a lot more attractive than one whose purpose revolves around his girl's happiness.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

In really enriched, healthy long term relationships: 

It's fucken normal to have a life purpose AND want to make your partners day awesome. It's not one or the other. Half the time it ends up being as simple as finding something to do from them in their love language. Both partners do this for each other... It comes from a place of abundance. It almost feels like some users haven't experienced this. Or don't know this is a thing.

The issue with doing shit for your partner to make their day better creeps in when it comes from a place of lack, unclear commitment or shitty transactional tallying where you think you are owed something for the gesture. 

If there is balance. Secure commitment. It is enriching.

Edited 3 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Leo Gura]

Simp vibes

[Spiral]

Don’t tolerate disrespect or people being rude. That’s how you find yourself as a nice guy.

Endless tolerance is a path to being treated horribly.

Edited 3 hours ago by Spiral

[Leo Gura]

1 minute ago, Spiral said:

Don’t tolerate disrespect or people being rude.

That is important of course, but being strong requires more than just that.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

17 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Simp vibes

I always feel like simps are.... The male equivalent to sluts. I feel bad for this thought 😬

[Spiral]

@Leo Gura Throw in some authenticity and you’re half way in

[Spiral]

Just now, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I always feel like simps are.... The male equivalent to sluts. I feel bad for this thought 😬

Nothing wrong with being a slut More certainly wouldn’t hurt

[something_else]

26 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

In really enriched, healthy long term relationships: 

It's fucken normal to have a life purpose AND want to make your partners day awesome. It's not one or the other. Half the time it ends up being as simple as finding something to do from them in their love language. Both partners do this for each other... It comes from a place of abundance. It almost feels like some users haven't experienced this. Or don't know this is a thing.

The issue with doing shit for your partner to make their day better creeps in when it comes from a place of lack, unclear commitment or shitty transactional tallying where you think you are owed something for the gesture. 

If there is balance. Secure commitment. It is enriching.

Great points . I didn't really actively think about ways to make my last girlfriend's life better most of the time, the opportunities just arose naturally and I took them. 

Probably the most excited I've ever seen her was after she told me somebody ate her fruit pastels at work. Before she got home I went out the shop and bought her two more packs and gave them to her when she got home. Like 5 minutes of my time, £3 spent, and I'd never seen her look so happy.

The other thing she got super excited about was when I'd bring her back cool rocks from a hike. 2 seconds of my time, £0 spent.

Really simple, small gestures that show you're thinking about the other person make the world of difference in a relationship. Often more difference than the bigger gestures.

[JoshB]

I would say the core factor in attraction is self esteem. If you can't stand yourself why would she? People reflect back your own state. A nice guy is someone who doesn't know how to love themselves and tries to unconsciously self validate through others. 

I'd say it is the root cause, try just raising your self image and see how people treat you. Attraction will come naturally.

Where as "douche bag chad" loves himself very much but doesn't give a fuck about his surroundings but still pulls. Your inner state reflects the outer that simple.   

Edited 2 hours ago by JoshB

[Leo Gura]

44 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I always feel like simps are.... The male equivalent to sluts. 

Nah, pickup guys are the male sults.

Simps are like co-dependent women who stay in abusive relationships.

Edited 2 hours ago by Leo Gura

[Spiral]

3 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Nah, pickup guys are the male sults.

Simps are like co-dependent women who stay in abusive relationships.

You can make the argument that sluts undermine other girls ability to find relationships by offering sex easier.

While nice guys offer validation and companionship without requiring the perks of a sexual/romantic relationship from the girl. Thus undermining men’s interests.