I'm still not fully accepting this "hard work" and effort thing

[mmKay]

If life is consistently a grind, you're doing something wrong

[Joshe]

12 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Not resisting the chronic issue - suggesting professional help. Chemical imbalance is what needs to be considered.

Unless you are happy to claim you are equipped to deal with suicide, depression and suicidal ideation? Which is the context here. 

I am saying if the issue is that bad, there could possibly be a neurotransmitter issue/imbalance or serious psychiatric issue at play.

 

Clinical support can be useful. But OP's distress appears to map cleanly onto their environment. Not that mental health should be ignored, just that fixing structure appears to be the lowest hanging fruit with the highest potential leverage. It's possible this alone solves the current problems. 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

5 minutes ago, Joshe said:

Clinical support can be useful. But OP's distress appears to map cleanly onto their environment. Not that mental health should be ignored, just that fixing structure appears to be the lowest hanging fruit with the highest potential leverage. It's possible this alone solves the current problems. 

Possible, but there is additional context 

[Joshe]

1 hour ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Possible, but there is additional context 

Lol. You tryna pull rank on me bro? Leo rubbing off on you? 😂

Does "additional context" = your pre-existing lens?

Here's my read: 

I think you successfully operationalized courage, Kaizen, tiny actions, mindset shifts, etc.,  and after ample effort, they worked for you, so you concluded they're universal tools. But they worked because you had the base and circumstances. The tools didn't create your stability, they optimized it.

Now, you're trying to give OP optimization tools when they need foundation tools. And when the tools don't fit, you don't question the tools, you question OP (maybe it's chemical, maybe they need a professional). The tools can't be the problem, right? And external reality can't be the problem, right? It MUST BE internal, and if it can't be overcame internally, it must need a professional.

If you've never been trapped in serious survival mode, it's hard to grasp how much it dominates your experience. It's not just a stressor, it's THE stressor that makes everything else much harder. The solution is to fix it, not optimize around it.

We've had a good joust. Time to pop a bottle and watch some fireworks. Happy New Year! 😁

Edited December 31, 2025 by Joshe

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@Joshe nothing you have said is a fair assessment. You make many assumptions. About myself. My history. My intentions.

I am not sure why you speak in such a way.

 

Edited 8 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Joshe]

3 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

@Joshe nothing you have said is a fair assessment. You make many assumptions. About myself. My history. My intentions.

I am not sure why you speak in such a way.

You're right. Sorry about that. My intention was to sketch out how the position might arise. It was my best guess. Feed me data and I'll update. lol

 

[Ulax]

I'd argue though that a key thing is self-belief. If you believe that you will be successful then the hard work has a very different flavour to it.

Often that belief stems from having earlier corrective experiences. For example, seeing progress from a gym program.

Hard work for a depressed person who has struggled to meet their previous goals, and hard work for someone with many accomplishments behind them, is rather different I'd argue. 

So, if you are someone who has struggled to meet goals, then you'll need to get some corrective experiences and then your relationship to hard work will change. At least that is my theory.

 

Edited 9 minutes ago by Ulax