Frustrated Sexually and in Other Ways I Cannot Explain

[Oso]

I have decided to write whatever is about to come out via pen and paper as my perfectionism has less of a grasp around my throat as in comparison to writing in a doc. 

There is a million places I could start. Perhaps first I should address you, the reader. 

I don’t know at the moment where this will end up but it is my desire to talk with you. 

I desire it deeply. Being able to reflect with another human is a great gift.

Therefore, I genuinely invite you to respond and speak your mind to the content herein. I would like to hear what you have to say. I'm at such a point in life where that reflection is needed. 

- - - 

So, all of that precursory information for what?

Well, I need to shine a light on myself and my current condition. 

I am 21 years old. The next thing that came up in my head was “I am sexually frustrated.”

That is true. I am. I place a lot of value into the thought of an intimate partner, yet lack so much genuine experience. 

I’ve had a handful of various relationships with women, and have had far less sexual experience, something I both crave more and feel starved of the older I have gotten. 

I don’t even know what to say about it. I’m experiencing the intuitive feeling that I have got this all wrong and mixed up.

- - - 

I feel like I’m going crazy in so many ways.

As I write this, I attempt to remain grounded in some form of calm sanity, yet it is tough.

The more I dig, the closer I feel to breaking open a raging demon’s cage.

Intense and overwhelming blank-mindedness floods my head, and I feel how I imagine a hollow from Dark Souls feels. 

It all feels rather fucky. From this point I don’t know where to go. On my chest is the weight of a million things that want to be said, but I can’t make out what any of them are.

It is frustrating. I need to talk this out.

[Leo Gura]

Most people are sexually frustrated. Go work to get the sex you desire. That's better than sitting around hating your situation. Once you start taking action towards your goal every day you will feel better, even if you don't hit the goal yet.

Also, learn to sexually satisfy yourself. Do don't need anyone for that. You should be able to satisfy yourself sexually more than another person would. Do that to hold yourself over until your work pays off.

Edited 8 hours ago by Leo Gura

[RendHeaven]

17 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Go work to get the sex you desire. That's better than sitting around hating your situation. Once you start taking action towards your goal every day you will feel better, even if you don't hit the goal yet.

^

[samijiben]

Thanks for dumping out your heart, Oso.

You are a young man, hopefully a handsome one, with a bright future & lots to give...

So Give! Stop looking to receive, to get more, to fix yourself — Start looking to give, give, give! 

Maybe acts of service will help you get over yourself — another way to gain closure on this matter is to just SEE FOR YOURSELF — you do not need a girlfriend. You do not need sex. You do not need human intimacy.

All you need is nothing, and it is already yours. This is not a simple one-and-done epiphany kind of thing, but an ongoing participation in the unfolding of yourself.

Its all about staying on your Tippy Toes, brother. If you so much as miss a step, you run the risk of getting expelled to the badlands where zombie-energy is forever on the rise. 

 

[samijiben]

Oh, and about the sex:

Go ahead and start lookiing to get your johnson wet. Get yo cock up in some pussy!!

NO! don't you see how twisted this is? Not because it is wrong or perverted or even just plain stupid to pursue sex — it isn't. It's just that you got things backwards, man.

Look, what Leo and others say is not just good advice but necessary  —  because if you continue to dwell in this problem without doing anything about it (that is, going out there, and getting your johnson wet — or developing a deep intimacy with a woman, whatever), it will fester & make you a sour soy boy.

So by all means, start developing your social prowess. 

When it actually comes down to "IT," however, you must Must MUST (eventually, God-Willing), face the real source of "your problem."

You gotta go there, man. And not just now. Time and time again. This is a commitment. This is a commitment to being. This is a commitment to love. This is an enchanting adventure that does not end. Enjoy.

[RendHeaven]

51 minutes ago, samijiben said:

hopefully a handsome one

crazy work lol

and what if he's not? 😭

that could be a major hangup. A lot of guys unfortunately count themselves out based on perceived aesthetic inadequacy

@Oso let us know what's stopping you

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPTIQpfoxUs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejsCZWrV8PQ

https://www.shinzen.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/art_urges.pdf

Edited 5 hours ago by Raze