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About Azote

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    Moscow, Russia
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  1. To become the world's dopest data-driven visual communicator
  2. Man, I can feel it right now
  3. Metaphysically I dunno, but 'something wicked this way comes'.
  4. Things kinda started to move
  5. Okay, I don't knowhow to do shit. That's confusing. God I need a mentor Just, get this lazy ass up and find them.
  6. Just wanted to share Finally, I had to merge the "science" and "art" folders on my hard drive into one "life purpose" folder.
  7. Update Yo, folks. Guess who's still alive and on their way to get shit handled Although my health marathon doesn't go as expected, I kinda proceed organically with my development. Made some progress in both life purpose, relationships, mindsets and body domains.
  8. @thesmileyone This particular test is kinda lame tho. The best easy introduction to SD imo is given in "spiral dynamics integral" book. Or Leo's first video on the subject:
  9. Well thanks. However, I believe I'm dealing with obstacles of another kind right now...
  10. I probably should, although they would probably tell me to just stop watching bearded bald talking heads on the internet @OrpheusNovum That's the thing. There are no suicidal tendencies as long as there are debts to pay. I try to imagine my life without this obligation. and I fail to find any meaning in it. So, it is in my best interest to keep this status quo. If I want to change this situation, I have to find better meaning in life. Option 1: Lurk more until I stumble upon another random shit as @Shadowraix proposes. Option 2: Go study metaphysics and find a higher purpose. Unfortunately, this is where total nihilism awaits. Option 3: This is all just beliefs/self-esteem/shadow/lack of life experience/etc, so go fix that and everything will be fine.
  11. It appears to me that I have no real ambitions or purpose in life other than returning my debts. This is how I see my future: I do some self-actualization work, that allows me to repay my loans, compensate my parents for losses they had while upbringing me, compensate ecological damage by some virtuous activities, and then take a shot of morphine and die in sleep, since I will have no more reasons to live. Like, shit, I can't force another, more optimistic and ambitious vision. And of course, I'm not motivated or productive, because any work brings the death closer. Is it a self-esteem issue and I should just do more of Nathaniel Branden's exercises? Some experience I should have that would help, maybe? Limiting belief? Why do you live and do the work?
  12. Yeah, much more dangerous than advising to get enlightened to cure depression for example
  13. Nope. You need separate account for the main website.
  14. @Hardkill You get access to this series after registration on It's not about relationships though. It's about limiting beliefs that make you wander in generalisations instead of working on actual strategy to resolve your situation