Martin123

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Posts posted by Martin123

  1. Posted

    Just now, Max_V said:

    @Martin123 You are the Martin that posted an emotional healing guide type post on the forum back a long time ago, right? Don’t think I ever thanked you for that. That helped me a lot through difficult times. Thank you so much. 

    Hope you’re doing good. 

    Thanks Max, yes that’s me, that was many many moons ago, I think I hid or deleted it as I didn’t like that work anymore. It would’ve looked much differently today.

    nevertheless lovely you found it helpful! 

  2. Posted · Edited by Martin123

    8 minutes ago, seeking_brilliance said:

    If, on a self help forum, many suggestions of self help are seen as abuse, God help us all... 

    Yesterday @Gesundheit called my inner child work ‘middle aged lesbian projection’.

    that is not HELP, that’s verbal abuse.

     

    Then a mod tried to guilt trip or scold me into apologising for speaking up, as if I were to deny something that only resulted in a healthy conversation for many participants.

     

    Not help, not self, no self-help in that.

     

     

  4. Posted · Edited by Martin123

    @Leo Gura I think this is all fine since we can use the ignore function and move on, the issue was originally raised against mods acting disrespectfully and us being unable to block em. 

    I find some things mods here say/do rather unhealthy, if I could block them and move on and cleans myself that, I personally would be grateful, not having that option puts me into an awkward position. 

  5. Posted

    6 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

    Well that's simply not my perception of things.

    So what ? 
    Abuse that’s not perceived as abuse is still abuse.

    your perception of things is just your individual perspective, it doesn’t mean anything about my experience or other people’s experiences of abuse and disrespect. Examples of it are many, in this very thread. 
     

    You’re suggesting that abuse is in the eyes of the perceiver, which is an excuse that decisively deserves the award ‘the enabler of the year’.

     

    congratulations, may you be awarded. 

  6. Posted

    @mandyjw and then when you’re being abused others start pretending to be insightful and when you speak up you’re bombarded with bullshit like ‘oh isn’t that more about you ? Aren’t you projecting ? Isn’t it actually your fault that this person is disrespecting you ?’

     

    .... and the gaslight train goes on. 
     

    ps: to use the law of attraction to blame yourself is only a self-gaslighting mechanism, nothing more and certainly not an insight. 

  7. Posted

    4 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

    @Martin123 Isn't it inclusive when some guy in the military can talk openly about topics like psychedelics and mystical experiences without worrying about losing his means of providing for his family?

    Yes, it seems to be a double-edged sword.

    The anonymity isn’t the issue, the issue is that members get away with disrespectful borderline a abusive speech without consequences. 

  9. Posted

    Just now, RedLine said:

    There is some green pathological mentality when

    But if you call green pathological doesn’t that make you automatically orange/blue/red and puts you in a position where you are to learn from the vulnerability and authenticity of green rather than pretend you’re above and beyond it ?

    2 minutes ago, RedLine said:

    There is nothing wrong with making strong assertion if you are sure what you say and despite who is offended.

     

    You’re right. The strong assertion is that much of what goes on in here is toxic and unhealthy.

     

    Strong assertion made. 

  10. Posted

    4 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

    @Martin123 This forum goes much deeper than simple Facebook groups. I started having mystical experiences not knowing what they were two years ago and really needed some guidance. I posted on an Eckhart Tolle Facebook page and my post was never even approved. So I came over here. Just because something appears inclusive on the surface doesn't mean it is. At all. 

    Hey Mandy. I’m not sure about Eckhart’s group, I’ve never been there.

     

    ive joined the ‘Sophia code official forum’ after listening to the Sophia Code audio book (which isn’t for everyone and not everyone will resonate with it), however the way I was received and the way that place is moderated is fantastic!!! :) only because love and emotional authenticity are an emphasis of the teachings and the overall spirit.

     

    Another place I was very pleased with (although it isn’t perfect) was a Facebook group that discussed attachment styles, which is a relationship focused issue, therefor if we are seeking more mature relationships it would be rather instinctive to ‘relate’ to others more maturely.

     

    ActualiZed.org isn’t relationship building focused though, it is often rather alienating and perpetuating patterns of disconnection and isolation. There are even people who say it alienated them from their friends, go figure... isn’t that a red flag lol. 

    2 minutes ago, Ananta said:

    Actually, thanks @Leo Gura for the mod opportunity, but it's no longer what I want.

    I QUIT, effective immediately. Please strip me of all mod privileges and responsibilities.

    Thank you.

    Thank you for your service and contributions, I’ve always had a very pleasant and desirable experience with you. 
     

    farewell ‘MOD’ Anna ! :) 

  11. Posted

    I’ve gotta say there are communities that I’ve joined (as simple as Facebook groups), and the tonality of the conversations is way more kind, respectful and inclusive for everyone. It is dedicated to the well-being of one another.

     

    here the emphasis is more on whether the things someone says are ‘true’, rather than helpful, kind and inspiring unity consciousness.
     

    If we are overly focused on what’s true rather than whether the way something is conveyed is helpful and supportive to someone else, we are missing the point of what it means to communicate in a healing way with another human being.

     

    Truth is subjective, but the way we feel about the words being spoken and the feelings they inspire in our bodies are always objectively right for each of us. 

  14. Posted

    The double standard is that I see people getting banned for ‘trolling’ or ‘posting low quality things’, and then there are members who get away with verbal abuse on a regular basis without it being taken seriously, as if it weren’t a bannable offence.

     

    Yes you can block them, but it is unhelpful to cultivate an environment where rudeness, disrespect, and borderline abusive behaviour is tolerated.

     

    This would however have to be also seen in the context of Leo (as he admitted himself) posting in a way that’s arrogant and obnoxious (which is disrespectful to the members). 

  15. Posted

    2 minutes ago, Michal__ said:

    Well, you have to get the mods somewhere. As far as I know, they don't get paid. It is basically charity from their part. 

    Yes this is a very important point everyone’s gotta remember.

     

    that being said there’s no excuse of abuse of power, even though locking an old thread is in my opinion hardly a pressing issue.

    24 minutes ago, kai0 said:

    thank you for reading and thank you @Martin123 for bringing up the topic I appreciate your courage it inspired me to stand up against what I believe is abuse and corruption 

    I appreciate your words and thanks for your contributions, all the best!! :) 

  17. Posted

    4 minutes ago, Danioover9000 said:

    Could you explain the last part of your paragraph? 

    We had a counselling exam where the 'therapist/professor' acted as a client of ours and we were to offer him counselling. He however even though in a client position took control over the conversation and didn't allow me to have my own counselling style and insisted on the session going his way, which is a boundary violation, and I complained about it as such.

    Sometimes if you post an issue of yours here, you get picked apart by seemingly insightful posts that are more of a mechanism of control and pressure, rather than a helpful offering. It is the advice being offered to you being more about the one offering advice, rather than about the recipient of it, as if they were 'getting off' on their role of being needed. 
    Not all the advice here works that way, but some of it does. (PS: I used to do the same thing to others years ago, that's how I recognize how toxic it is).

     

     

    3 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

    How do you set a user on ignore?

    upper right corner, click the drop down menu, just above the 'sign out' button there's a 'ignored users' option, there you can add people to ignore to your heart's content.

  19. Posted

    12 minutes ago, Danioover9000 said:

    Another complaint is not introducing the option to ignore moderators. Not gonna name, but there are a few that are really abusing their roles

    Bro I don’t think it’s not the issue we can’t ignore mode, the issue is mods who abuse their power are still mods. 
     

    in other words, not many people have a good idea how to respect emotional boundaries here, including mods. Some of them tend to Be invasive which I’ve been vocal about in the past (actually just one in particular in my experience, and I am not afraid to say that that one mode (I think some of us can paint the picture) does not act in a way that is respectful of people’s boundaries). 
     

    ive a counselling university background I’ve had a professor taken off a course he was teaching over a lesser complaint I filed than what goes on here on a regular basis. 

  20. Posted

    @Seraphim you’re only asking that question form a space suggesting that the belief in indigo children is wrong. Star seeds, indigo children, crystal children, earth angels, old souls, are very much real and valid. It’s jus the sense of wanting to belong that dissolves because you find an inner sense of belonging, without needing to believe or stop believing anything, because belief is irrelevant. 
     

  24. Posted

    @Pallero I would agree that psychedelics aren’t useful unless you take enough time and space to integrate them, which if you keep tripping you seriously don’t and it’s cray. 
     

    the way you integrate the truth is through integrating your emotional body which is the manifestation of your inner child, seeing the child as toxic only implies an adversarial relationship to your emotions and thus a great unwillingness to emotionally integrate the truth of who and what you and all of us are.