Martin123

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  1. yeah you got it No, because it is coming from an initial place of un-okayoness. I mean think about it, if you were truly okay with it, you wouldn't need to visualize anything. Instead admitting to yourself that you might not be ok with certain situations and emotions honestly, honoring the authenticity in your subconscious mind might be more helplful. This is a really common thing that we take on from our parents in upbringing. As guys, we often get the sense that certain emotions and feelings, and having emotional needs isn't okay, due to the relationship we have with our mother early on. When you think back to your childhood, I bet you could probably find instances of your mom (and I say mom specifically) acting out or being upset and manipulative as a result of you wanting to have your emotional needs met. Then we can actually look at the pattern of you trying to visualize the scenario and say OH MY GOD, it's a continuation of a manipulative pattern that I was exposed to during my childhood. And see that's why it won't work. Its not that visualizing scenarios cant be helpful, but while doing so youre recreating an unresolved pattern.
  2. no you don't have to visualize any bad scenarios. When you're doing this you're actually avoiding the rawness of the experience when bad scenarios actually happen and you're using self-love as a form of emotional manipulation. You don't need to visualize a bad scenario, you just gotta be willing to go through the visceral experience of negative emotions that come as a result of a negative circumstance. Basically you're affirming a belief that being devastated and feeling bad isn't okay. So now you know.
  3. @Charlotte Not sure what you mean. I think theyre all fun to use, it seems to be helpful to people so I just kind of leave it here.... I dont wish to write guides on how to heal oneself anymore.
  4. I think there is a typo in the translation. Picaso in this situation was just being mean towards the man, shaming his "FAT" wife, not actually addressing the flatness of the object on which she was portrayed......... Its a mistake many historians make, heck its still in most textbooks. Only the most up-to date scholars know the truth
  5. @Aaron p wooooo yayyyy 🙅🏻‍♀️❤️
  6. Awesome question and observation. Self-love is a way to melt our own resistance to relief, relaxation and the positive spectrums of emotions. When you sit in meditation, there are two ways in which that can go. Its either to move deeper into our experience, or to dissociate and dis-engage from experience. A dissociative way of meditating isnt the most integrated approach to spirituality as it further denies the importance of our emotional experience. And while it can certainly expand awareness and consciousness, connect you to higher levels of reality, it doesnt honor the gruelling intensity of our human experience. Self-love is respectful in that regard, nay it is of the highest importance. Unless we approach our meditations, contemplations and spiritual ambitions with interest and affection towards our bodies and emotional experiences, we are just playing out patterns of avoidance.
  7. @kev014 Much more relaxed, not too rushed, not as much of a structured way. More of listening to our emotions, more appreciating our inner child, less work, more patience, more kind parenting of ourselves as if we were our own children. :-)
  8. @Jordan94 ps when I wrote this guide I Was in a very tryhard place on my journey. It certainly isnt the most integrated way of approaching ones emotional healing.
  9. @Jordan94 There isnt a really way how its supposed to be done. Its just an exploration into what feels good, relaxing, supportive and nourishing for your emotions. Its not a matter of trying to heal, its a matter of allowing the healing that has always been underway. :-)
  10. I think the living without it is wayy more challenging.
  11. Oh my god I had a perfect advice for this I swear but... I just cant remember... ughhh
  12. @ShaharA Coffee is the gift from heavens, people who talk shit about coffe are the most unconscious bunch on the planet, they just jelly of the coffe-heaven-like perfection that enters our lives every morning.
  13. @EvilAngel OHhh story of my life... ding ding ding... Heres what happened with me. I had the same mentality, like I aint lonely, I Dont need people, people who seem overly attached kind of creeped me out (almost as if they like triggered a really creepy instincts in my gut). Which you know... thats enmeshment trauma After healing my enmeshment - allowing my repressed sense of self re-develop, allow myself to set boundaries and stuff, boy o boy, did I become a hell of a codependent.... But IT FET SOO GOOOD.... It got me in touch with my unresolved emotional needs, and strangely enough that felt better than avoiding and running away from connection. I came in contact with the part of me that was SOO starved of love, and I was sooo needy... for a while... and I LOVED IT It was so fun... Now im not saying you have enmeshment trauma... I am saying... think about things that I said if you like to think, thinking is fun!
  14. @EvilAngel Has it ever happened to you where youre overcoming codependency and all your friends who are still steeped in it are now all really weird to hang out with, and you just dont know what to do without looking like a little bit of a dick? Defeinitely happened to me a lot
  15. Haha really thats funny. Its true it did give off a bit of a codependent vibe... Even Matt did admit that it took him until recently to really work out codependency so who knows... maybe this was one of those working out moments ._.