Spiritual Warrior

"Kill the boy and let the man be born." This is the best line for a guy. There is something about transforming yourself into somebody that is masculine, mature, and capable that is so inspiring to me.

Gods Bathroom Floor The self image is a complete fabrication. It is a mockery of Truth. Anytime you think about what another individuals perception is of you, slap yourself across the face. Thinking like this is utter nonsense. Take me away. Release me from this prison, I don't want to be here anymore. I am ready to transcend.

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #67 - Sat July 19, 2025 7:24 PM Nothingness Lower self: We talked about nothingness a few chapters back. What is it and why does it have significance in Truth work? Higher Self: Nothingness is exactly that, it is an empty void that is made up of its own name, nothing. The tree next to me is nothingness, my car is nothingness, this water is nothingness, my body is nothingness. Lower self: I'm not following... Higher Self: Your identity is not Truth. Your mind is not Truth. The birds are not Truth. The sky is not Truth. You can make an infinite list of things that are not Truth. If everything is not Truth, what do you have left? You have nothing. Nothingness is the ultimate truth of the universe. Experience this. Truly experience this and you will transcend your physical body. The real kicker here though is that nothingness also equates to infinite creation. If there is nothing really there, then you have a blank slate in which you can create anything that you want. These creations remain in the relative realm while nothingness is forever present in the background as an Absolute Truth. Lower self: Okay, this all makes sense, but how do I experience this? I have no direct experience of this nothingness that you are describing. Higher Self: Sure you do... Just look around. "Close your mind, close your eyes, see with your heart" - Lupe Fiasco

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #66 - Fri July 18, 2025 12:22 PM The Eight Headed Octopus Higher Self: Hello little one. What is true? Lower self: It is true that I am. Which means that I am able to experience this, whatever this is… I don't know. But I am here. I am is all that I know. I know nothing else so I am going to enjoy the pure majesty of the feeling within this body, good or bad. I am is the essential truth. I am is true without a doubt, no ifs ands or buts. But this I am ness seems to be coming from the fact that this body is alive, the heart is beating, the brain is working, the muscles are firing. So what happens to the I am ness when the body decays? What on earth would happen then? I am unsure. And how could I know? I am honestly not sure about much. Which is why I am afraid of death. What is death? Higher Self: Death is a construction in your own head. Death is not real. Death is something that was made up by man. Lower self: But I don't understand… death is a real thing, my body will die, it will be buried in the ground and Ben will cease to exist. Higher Self: But remember… “Ben” is not a real and tangible thing, it is a mental construction. Sure, “Ben” will die one day in a relative sense, but the Absolute Truth of the matter is I am. That is all that you know and therefore is all that there ever was and will ever be. Lower self: But how do you know that? Just because I am experiencing the Truth in this current moment does not mean that the Truth will forever exist. Higher Self: The Truth is forever or it would not be Truth. Truth with a capital T is truth without any doubts, no ifs ands or buts. Lower self: Okay… then I am is not Truth because I cannot verify that this I am ness will last forever. I only experience what is occurring in this moment. Higher Self: There is no forever in the Absolute realm. There is just the present, which means that the present, this current experience, in this very seat, typing on this phone, is forever. Time is a mental construction. Stop thinking in the relative sense or you will never transcendent. Look for truth in every interaction, in every second of every day and one day it will reveal itself to you. It will come out of the depths of illusion like an octopus with 18 heads. This is infinite creation. Now go enjoy yourself, you only have one life in this current form.

My mind is melting. I realize now that it is not real. That nobody is real. Nothing is real at all. The only thing that I am sure of that is real is "I am." Everything else can be thrown into the trash. Every name. Every friend. Every religion. Every book. Every movie. Every thought. Every lover. None of it. None of it is true. Discard it all. What do we do when we have nothing left? We have a blank slate... And now we can create..

Life is very counter intuitive

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #65 - July 12, 2025 8:14 AM Higher self: Okay lower self, it's your time to shine.. what is true? Lower self: It is true that "I am experiencing things." Higher self: What does it mean to experience something? Lower self: To experience something is to have the capacity to feel and relate and communicate and take action. Higher self: What does it mean to "have capacity"? Lower self: To have capacity for something is to be able to do it. And I have capacity to experience things because I am a human being. Higher self: So if you were not a human being, you would not have capacity to do things? Lower self: Well no... I guess that is not entirely true, I do not know if I would have the capacity to experience things if I wasn't human, maybe I would.. so let's take that out, I have the capacity to experience... Let's just leave it at that. Higher self: "I have" .. meaning you own this capacity? Who is it that owns this capacity? Lower self: I do. I am a perceiver. I perceive. I experience... Higher self: And what is this "I" that you continue to speak of? Lower self: "I" is referring to me, this body, this personality, this face. Higher self: But didn't we already establish that the body, the personality, the face is not the true "I." This is just a construction in our own minds in order to make sure that this organism continues to survive and one day reproduces. Lower self: Yes we did establish that.. then the "I" that I am referring to is not the body, not the mind, not the face, not the personality, it is just presence itself. It has no location, it just is. Higher self: Hmmm... Interesting... Lets go back to the original statement.. "I am experiencing things" the "I" in this statement is not referring to the body or mind, it is referring to an awareness that is always present. "I am" refers to the fact that this is a present experience, not in the past, not in the future.* Now the words "experiencing things" actually refers to the experience itself and is therefore a false portion of this statement and may be discarded. Now we are left with "I am" and that is it. Now go ahead lower self, recap what we just talked about. Lower self: Okay sure, "I am" is referring to the ability to be present in this very moment. And that is it, it has nothing to do with the ownership of the body or personality traits or material possessions, it is "I am" here and "I am" present. That is our true face, our true nature. Take all of the bullshit away and that is all that is left. Given this revelation, I am going to integrate some reading sessions of "Presence" by Rupert Spira. I should be able to finish that book within 2 months, so by September 12th. The Peter Ralston book will be a slow burn. I am going to continue to read that thing over over again, taking copious notes until enlightenment experiences start to unravel. Higher self: Good job today little one. You are on your way. Lower self: Thanks, I'm excited 😊

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #64 - July 6, 2025 9:45 PM Lower self: I am sick of living for myself, for my own ego. It is unfulfilling.. all of these fantasy stories that I tell myself, they're all bulshit. Total fucking bullshit. And I'm sick of it. I am sick of living a lie. All they do is cause suffering. And I've had enough of suffering. I want to know the Truth. I want to know the Truth at all costs. And nothing and I mean nothing is going to stop me. Wish me luck Higher Self. Higher Self: it's about time you started taking this work seriously. Now, what are some tangible things that you are going to start doing to make this goal a reality some day? Lower self: I am going to start reading The Book of Not Knowing again and take notes on every single chapter. I am going to read that book over and over and over again until I get smacked in the face, until my reality pops like a fucking balloon. I am going to do Kriya Yoga every single morning, no exceptions, for at least 20 minutes. I am going to welcome my higher self with arms wide open. My Kundalini energy is going to crawl up my spine like a serpent and swallow my brain whole so that I face the Truth and cannot look away. I am going to steer into what is uncomfortable until I find exactly what I am looking for, or find out that there was nothing to look for the whole time, whichever comes first. Higher self: You seem motivated, good for you. How are you going to keep this drive when the going gets rough and you want to be lazy? Lower self: I am first and foremost going to remember my vision. My vision is to attain a level of consciousness that no human has ever accessed. I am going to fully grasp and understand all of reality so that I can make the highest and purest and most profound impact on humanity. This is going to take a lot of work and I have a long road ahead of me, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I'm sick of living a lie. Higher self: Good for you, now get to work.. and come back here when you need to vent. You will have to confront many harsh truths throughout this process and I will always be here to talk you off the ledge. Lower self: I will not stop writing in this journal until my self identity is completely dissolved and I merge with the Oneness of reality. Until that day comes...

So go on The Truth awaits you And when you find the path Don't you dare look back

But we are here So we might as well comfort each other

I am not going to hurt you I am going to support you, hold you up if I have to But we are all one You and I are the same What now?

I am also proud of you 🙂

Great advice

The point of the post is to spread positivity.

We can always find something to be proud of in ourselves