zunnyman

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About zunnyman

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  • Birthday 10/30/1995

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  1. @student Do I have to have these experiences again? I mean, like aren’t there many paths up the mountain? What if I chose a different path up the mountain. One that is more gradual, a slow surrender, maybe more pleasant and loving with love type practices? Can these terrifying experiences be avoided? What if this spiritual path is more pleasant after I have plugged in many holes in Maslow’s hierarchy and moved up a few stages in Spiral dynamics. Also, One thing I noticed that made the surrender even harder was that I was surrendering on a drug vs sober. Reason being, on a drug it came too fast and too much for me to handle. Plus on weed, many times I don’t know what makes sense. On weed my mind also enters heavy paranoia.
  2. @molosku @Lucas Lousada @Quanty @Arman @Faceless @FeathersandPennies you guys have no idea how much you helped me put my mind at ease. Past few days I have been so hopeless about life and just utterly fearful about a lot of things. Your words are slowly guiding me out of this. I dont even consider myself an emotional person but many of your words brought me to tears, of hope and gratitude. Im so glad I posted on here, I didn’t think I would recover so fast, or at all. <3 I am still unsure about a lot of things, especially about how to go about pursuing consciousness work more slowly and surrendering when its hard to surrender, making this journey more pleasant, but I know there are answers out there, and in time it will all make sense Definitely off weed for good though haha
  3. When I got high, my intent was to become more conscious of reality. At first I was attempting to deconstruct my beliefs, questioning everything and going deep into that. I was also practicing letting go meditation while also seeing the intelligence of reality using leo’s exercise. And that made me really fascinated about reality. But then I decided to do some meditation and focusing on my breath. I placed my attention on the breath and got into my body. Eventually it got to a point where it felt like I was dying, and absolutely couldn’t handle it so i moved around to distract myself and went to my phone. I thought it was gone, but as I looked around me, its like it was just sucking me in. If i was still, it would suck me in. So i had to move. Meaninglessness sucked me in and i was just in absolute fear for hours and hours. I was even questioning my own existence and seeing meaninglessness everywhere. My body was also vibrating so much. I couldn’t go to sleep because if my body was still it would enter into a very meditative state that id feel like im losing myself again. Now it has been a day. I have been in bed all day. Im depressed and so scared. Scared to meditate. Scared to feel into the emotions, because yes it would make the emotions dissapate, but that would also make me more calm. And the more calm I get, the more it feels like im dying. I feel so disoriented right now. I don’t know if anything would ever make me happy now. I don’t know if I am cut out for consciousness work if it would bring such horrific terror. I have had fear in my life, but nothing like this. This was terror. Even today if im still, the terror comes back. So far from what I understand this is a mix of cannabis paranoia and facing the fear of death Sorry for this being so long. I just need some help. I don’t know who to turn to or where to look for advice. I tried looking many places and talking to many people. Before this life was going so normal. I was productive, happy, etc.
  4. @Violina @Quanty Wow 2 people for the breath haha Why do you guys like this technique more than other meditation techniques?
  5. So many techniques haha, don’t know how to decide which one @Outer Why do you recommend self inquiry over other meditation techniques? Have your results and experiences been better? Do you find application hard? I remember trying it in the past, but just getting frustrated with it. I guess I have a problem with techniques that have a risk of improper application or much monkey mind you can get lost in or just the doubt of not doing it right, and getting disheartened and unmotivated because of that feeling. This is why something like strict mindfulness or strong determination or awareness on the breath appeal to me as it just seems so hard to get it wrong. I would hate to spend years doing meditation wrong. Well it seems like thats what I did already with do nothing. Not sure haha
  6. I don’t think I am ready for “no technique” as that just leaves a beginner like me confused. But I do like attention on the breath. It puts me in my body, good suggestion. I will consider this as well among the other techniques
  7. I need help choosing a meditation technique based on various pros and cons, my experiences, and leo’s video advice Do nothing * I have been doing this for 1.5 years and learned a lot about its application, and feel like since I did it so long I might as well master it (might be attached to the amount of time I invested) yet .. * most days I just feel like I am in monkey mind and doubting myself if I am doing it correctly even though I have read a lot on do nothing and many days I can say with certainty I am doing it right. This is my biggest reason for changing to strict mindfulness meditation with labeling * feel like I am going deep and noticed much spiritual purification with this Strict mindfulness meditation with labeling * Always feel like I am doing this technique right, and don’t get lost in monkey mind due to the labeling component that gives the mind focus * Noticed towards the end of the video leo says to shine mindfulness on the I, and I got the sense that I can’t have ego-death with just focusing on the 6 types of sensations he says to place mindfulness on. The reason i say this as a problem because, I really care about “proper application” and after being unsure about the “do nothing” technique for so long, I want a technique where my “proper application” is very on point. And I don’t know how to shine mindfulness on the I, as well as I do for the 6 sensations * On leo’s start page, he said this is the most important habit to build Leo’s next level of meditation * Through this technique I have personally experienced the most joy and peace, and almost ego death many times even though I have done this maybe a total of 20 times Strong determination * Leo says this is the fastest path to enlightenment
  8. Sadhguru isn’t an isolated example, even Leo is saying, taking from the creator of kriya yoga, that with kriya yoga you shouldn’t mix in different yoga styles, or modify it for whats convenient, or do the routines I choose to and leave out the rest, etc. I’m sure there’s good reason for why so many gurus are saying not to modify yoga, or maybe our western minded intellect won’t understand.
  9. Like for example, For a while I have been doing the technique from leo’s video on “strong negative emotions, but now I added a twist which is breathing into strong negative emotions, by going into and fully feeling strong negative emotions with the breath and the awareness of the breath - if all that makes sense lol And that felt great and worked really well for me, but felt too powerful to fast Could trying something untested like this (or maybe this is a technique that I never heard of) lead to weird experiences, physical or spiritual damage? I know sadhguru says modifying yoga is dangerous, but never heard of modifying meditation techniques
  10. @Nahm I see what your trying to say, which is the magnitude of what we are doing here. Literal and physical death. Even just now I was looking in the mirror and was like wow, what am I even building a life for right now. It really is just a house of cards. But Im also wondering that is there a possibility that consciousness work literally kills you to the point where even your body doesn’t go on living after ur death?
  11. In leo’s latest video, Hawaii Late Night Insights, he said that this awakening might make his body drop dead. Like can this work take you to that point, where you don’t even become awakened and die on the spot? I get physical and literal death as a part of the awakening process, but I didn’t know that your body can just drop dead. I’m not sure I heard leo correctly, but it sounds like he was making a distinction between phsyical/literal death and also that this work might make your body not continue by surrendering your life like a mahasamadhi. Was leo saying this as just something you have to accept, or are there actually cases where people do consciousness work and just drop dead on the floor? I know it is kind of ironic and paradoxical for me to say “I am willing to physically and literally die, but not willing to drop dead on the floor where my heart stops beating” but on a practical level I am doing this consciousness work for some payoff, not to drop dead.
  12. Hey Leo, I just bought your book. Very excited to implement this new puzzle in my life. Anyways, in the beginning of the vlog you mention how if you don’t have the proper diet, you should not be doing yoga at all. But as you talk about in your healthy eating videos, changing your diet is years and years of work, and I am very serious about rigorous yoga but I am highly addicted to sugar and wheat. I don’t go overboard with junk, but I have basic standard american diet foods like cereal, bread, etc. but then also I have a daily fruit smoothie. Do I just wait for years until I fix my diet, to start this yoga or should I try a nuclear approach and cut out all my addictive bad foods all at once so I can start this yoga practice? Please enlighten me
  13. These are great thoughts, insights, and solutions for effective habits guys, thank you
  14. Hey guys, I have been following leo’s advice on the start section on his website of implementing one habit at a time. So far I have one habit: 1 hour strong determination sitting that i have kept up for 10 months. Now I am planning on implementing one habit every 30 days. But after a few years won’t I have too many habits in place? There are atleast 15-20 juicy habits I want to implement in my life. Should I stick to only a few forever, or continue to implement one every 30 days with the faith that itll all work out in a few years. One solution I have figured out that I think will work is to add a new habit every 30 days to my morning routine, and evening routine, so it just mentally feels like I have 2 main habits (morning and evening routine) over the years that are just solidifying over time. Any thoughts on this as well?