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About BlackMaze

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  1. @r0ckyreed can't you see that figuring out wheter or not free will exists because its important is also a bias? No life is life and mental masturbation may be mixed with it or not. How can i wake up without an interest to contemplate? First of all you assumed this and second yes it's true that i don't because my focus is elsewhere. Me saying that i don't care about it and that it's mental masturbation comes from having this question at the back of my mind for some months. It both exists and not exist. That's why enough with the strokes.
  2. Find out first what you want to do with it. This will also help you to choose a language. Forget about difficulty you can learn everything. I like udemy courses. Getting a good book about the basics of the language you are interested in is a good idea. It's hard stuff, at least for me. You need to put the hours in.
  3. I decided that i don't care. This is mental masturbation. It doesn't change anything whatever the case.
  4. I am more apathetic than most people so it's less than 10. Lately i am thinking that my time here as this self is limited. People die at young age. Who knows when you will die. Yet we are afraid to live fully. Embarrassed to be open and speak truth. In the end it doesn't ever matter Linkin Park. You could die before dying.. But i like the dream. Maybe the reason i am here is to enjoy the dream. Maybe my real self plays sims and i am the character. Sims is a very spiritual game if you think about it. For example when i played it many years ago i used to make rooms without doors or make them swim to death and found it funny. The higher self is just having fun fulfilling needs, taking a promotion or developing relationships. When you are aware that you are the sim you can have the most fun. You are then the game character and the one that controls the character at the same time. You can even create the sims game within this game. So yeah fuck fear have fun.
  5. I was the least likely person to become a smoker and yet life did its best to make me very addicted. That's the only thing. I am grateful for every other bs in my life.
  6. For me it was something in between. I don't know what this feels like. I don't really crave traditional values to be honest. I don't like the feeling of being tied down. Have a stable grindy job and take care of my kids and pay a loan, drink on weekends, watch tv etc. No thanks. I prefer something more adventurous but family is something that i might consider when i am 35-40
  7. @PurpleTree yeah.. In other words if you have a vision and want to realize it bad enough the pushing yourself is going to be enjoyable. Spit fucking blood. You will enjoy it. Feel the fire lol. We are all looking for this inspiration but i don't think you can force it to occur. If it's there then ride it.
  8. Extremely push yourself but only if you are feeling it.
  9. Millenials are the smartest generation so far. It's the generation that can most clearly see the bs around. Life is unfair, deal with it. It depends on how you grow up. Your life being hard is a blessing in disguise. The earlier it happens the better. The faster you grow. The wimp stage you described is a necessary step. It's a phase that someone goes throught at hard times. Some people go through several such stages earlier and are done with it. If you face your first hardship at 30 for example because you were born in a privileged environment you are fucked. It just means that you lack the growth that you could have had earlier. Disappointments? They are the disappointments. We can just see their bs and don't want to be part of it. So yeah if you can't find meaning in what motivated your parents you will need some time to figure out what inspiration means and until then you might just do drugs and play video games.
  10. @Seth haha ok but also the biggest weirdo. The problem is that i am the weirdo in most universes. You guys should give it a try maybe in a new threat.
  11. Then don't. I am forced to try and sleep very early but most of the time it's impossible. Some of us are bats. It could be healthier to sleep at least a bit earlier though.
  12. You could read the books from the booklist.
  13. I don't like these tests
  14. You might be interested in reading body mind mastery from Dan Millman. I don't really remember this book i need to read it again but it might help. I get it. I miss my old thirst for all this but it was pointless. It's hard to get the same results without this kind of energy but it's certainly possible to have even better results without. One example from my experience was my preparation before a competition as a teen athlete. I would visualize every move in my mind the day before and i was doing yoga breathing exercises and meditation on the actual day to get in the right state of mind and in the zone fully concentrated on every move. So yeah take a meditative approach to your thing.