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About BlackMaze

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  1. Damn that gorilla creativity video was pure gold. I need to work more on emotional mastery if i ever want to be able to put in the work. I have too much stress again from everything. My head needs to become clear. I have all the rights to be stressed. I have good reasons. Even though this is the case this doesn't help at all. I am at least able to look the stress from above when i choose to. There is only the now, the things i do and the way i feel and think. I can't stay trapped in fear, anxiety, low energy and stress. Wallace wattles was way ahead of his time. The more time passes the more valuable i see his books to be. It is possible to be connected and feel good all the time just by being grateful as often as possible. How could he make this connection? I don't lack the knowledge or the resources. The only obstacles are negative emotions. This problem can be immediately solved by just being grateful all the time. Better start being grateful.
  2. So that's the only benefit?
  3. I eat everything but mostly plant based stuff. Will creatine really help with the recovery? Is it always a good idea to supplement with it? Or is it not really necessary and helps only with the performance?
  4. It's not about hearing something new. It's that it is transforming just by giving it a read. Of course there are many books that i still haven't read but i can't imagine a book being more powerful than this. Of course there are but this one is too life transforming to overlook. Many advanced folks would benefit from reading it if they haven't.
  5. I was watching the blog video learning from partially false perspectives. Leo why did you skip reading the new earth from eckhart tolle? Just because he is so popular? This book is very powerful. It is an absolutely must read book. Just because something is very popular doesn't mean that it's not one of the best. To skip a book because of its popularity is like judging a book from its cover. The analogy of the popular youtube videos is just not true in this particular case. I really believe that it deserves a place in the booklist in spite of its popularity. I don't want to be annoying here. Just give it a read sometime it's a great book.
  6. Nope it's a lost case.
  7. I regret it. She fully deserved it. I couldn't just keep pretending that everything is fine. It's really hard to decide if i did the right thing or the wrong thing. It's not in my character to express my anger like this. I kind of forced myself to do it. At least i wasn't fake. Really hard to decide. Maybe the relationship is broken forever. It's not my fucking fault. I love her but she kind of ruined my life so that's that.
  8. I expressed my 15 years build up anger in a 10 second phone call with my mother. I had no idea that my voice can get so low and loud. She deserved it. She is too stupid to understand where this came from. I don't know if i feel good about it or bad. I really wanted to avoid it. She is going to become even more fucked up after this. But my huge patience ended. I will take responsibility for my honesty. I took more responsibilities anyway. It had to happen.
  9. @integral not that interests anybody but i fap rarely. In fact i wonder if it would be better if i did it more often. Maybe not doing it decreases my testosterone and not the other way around. Maybe it's not testosterone but yeah this would be interesting to test somehow to see how my testosterone is. I believe it's normal though.
  10. @The0Self yeah it was so painful that i couldn't do it. I will just do something else when this happens like jogging
  11. @The0Self i'm already lean more or less. I never was overweight in my life. The struggle is to gain weight. I'm making progress in that but it's slow, i should eat even more. I wish i had a pull up bar, i will find a way to get one while not damaging the door frames but for the moment i'm very happy with the gains i'm making with the program. The only problem is that my recovery is very slow and sometimes i need to wait 5-6 days until my legs are ok again. Thanks for the training suggestions guys. I will try them out after i finish this program.
  12. Yeah i think i read only the first chapter or so. I'm definitely not willing to drink so much milk. I eat everything again but i'm not drinking any milk. I don't want to just get strong at any cost but to do it in a healthy way. Otherwise i would buy supplements with 1000 calories/scoop.
  13. @Lyubov thank you for the detailed answer really helpful. I wouldn't call myself weak i was fit in the past but never really got into weight training seriously mostly bodyweight and cardio. Then i didn't train consistently for years and lived unhealthy that's why i'm unfit. I'm already changing that. Xero is tough for everybody! Don't underestimate it just because it doesn't involve barbells. But sure the same gains would be easier probably with weights but i prefer to workout at home for now.
  14. @Lyubov i mean having both, to not focus only on lifting more (when i start weight lifting again) but also to have endurance, explosiveness etc. To have the right body for parkour for example would be the ideal for me while also being able to do calisthenics. I do love however the deadlifts, squats, shoulder and bench presses. The gyms are closed and i think i will just postpone it for a year before i go to the gym because i'm very happy with what i'm doing right now. @Average Investor you are right i could do that. I already do some yoga when i'm sore + massage and also i'm going to start using a foam roller but yeah i don't run and i miss it. I also like jumping rope but i do it rarely. That's a good idea for the sore days thanks.
  15. One time per week or less. If you start smoking more than that then you will just become a stoner and it will probably affect your life in some way.