De-actualizers And Strategies Of Coping With Them.

[Revolutionary Think]

I'm starting a deep philosophical topic that anyone who had a traumatic or less than average childhood can relate to. So when all of us were first born we really came into the world with absolutely nothing and the slightest stimuli would set us off either laughing or crying for any reason or sometimes no reason at all. As time kind of passed by our society, parents, (religious institutions) and education system took hold of our psyche and our very limited understanding of the world. All depending on where and when we were born. If you think about it you really trust your parents the most and in most societies when you are under the age of 18 you are basically their hostage for better or for worse. At a very young age our parents interpret the world for us but, then more things start coming into the mix like the school that we go to. Now I'm thinking that actualization has to do with positive things and positive habits that most parents instill in their children at a very young age like being nice to people, not lying, not being mean, and being happy. As you grow older though sometimes you may go through a de-actualization process. I like to say that it starts in the education system because the education system is chock full of people with ego's in fact I think that the education system is an ego building machine. It's all about competition and one upping your fellow classmates and always getting that good grade no matter what or it goes on your record and this record represents you. For me my de-actualization process started in middle school and I could even feel that something wasn't right.

My personal de-actualization process began when my parents divorced and put me in the middle of their fights. The fights would be about money and things like that. Not only was that de-actualizing but, the attitude of my middle school teachers as well. Being treated like just another number in school instead of an autonomous individual. Having teachers who hated their jobs and would announce it to the whole class. Being depressed and frustrated that what you learned in school almost had no bearing to what actually happens in the real world. Not only that is de-actualizing but, all the dogmas society puts into your head at a young age that if you don't do well in school you're basically useless as a human being and such. What is also de-actualizing is going through a culture that doesn't care about actualization and just goes through the same exact routines times and time again because of it being a "time honored tradition" even though it wasn't exactly a contemplative tradition that asked itself why it does these rituals. Then when you are in your teens and young adult years that is some serious de-actualization happening especially in the west with all the corrosive culture around you (not to mention where I live the epicenter of celebrity nonsense) everyone's role model is some rich celebrity that doesn't know what they're doing with their lives. This culture is highly competitive, materialistic, and based on what your status is. Sometimes this de-actualization leads people to pharmaceuticals, doing hard drugs, getting stuck in bad habits, and having a sense of hate and disgust for the rest of the world and humanity. 

I think there is a light at the end of the tunnel though. Sometimes you get older and you have the fortune (because not everyone does) of stumbling into something like this. Even if you didn't stumble upon places like actualized.org you can still be lucky enough to go through some kind of process of re-actualization and hopefully undo the de-actualization. You can do this by journaling, getting therapy, and letting go of dogmas just because you realize they are not helping you. Sometimes you re-actualize by relocating to a better place and a better community with more like minded people as well including less dogmatic more friendlier and warmer people. So what do you guys think? 

Keep in mind that even though I am watching Leo's content and engaging in this community I think that these de-actualizers in our life are all around us no matter how old we are and no matter where we are and the best we can all do is be vigilant about them. 

[godisthedevil]

I read your entire post and it made sense to me. I agree that society is messed up. Schools are horrible and parents far from nurturing. Lies surround us on all sides and money questing destroys spirituality questing. Many boys learn about sex by watching porn and girls must starve themselves to feel attractive. Thank God we at least have a clue about de-actualizers and can maybe root out a few. Thanks for your post!

[faith]

I don't think there are any de-actualizers. In fact, the whole actualizing process and thinking that you are actualizing is bullshit. All you develop is a bigger ego that thinks you are somehow superior to other people, or a neurotic way to keep improving yourself, and then you are stuck in self-absorption and perfectionism, and that's not so different than those "celebrity"-centred people. 

If you really want to actualize, beyond this word, you will just have to go into the world and find goodness in everyone, especially those people you labelled as "de-actualizers". I am not trying to insult you or be mean, and if I come off that way, I apologize, but I just want to let you know that acceptance is key. I know you want to do something about the educational system, and I know it's personal to you, but what good will it be when you are clearly looking at things "black vs white", "right vs wrong", "actualizers vs de-actualizers".

It's all the same.

[Revolutionary Think]

@ashashlov If you want to look at it that way sure. I'm not labeling the people as de-actualizers just their behavior as de-actualizing. I know it would alleviate a lot of pain in myself if I just accepted them but, I'm working on it. Somehow even though I have to come to terms with this and this is just the way the world works. I find the greatest injustice of all to be bringing someone into the world and abandoning and/or abusing them because they never gave permission to be born... if you catch my drift. We all know we live in a world that doesn't care, we see innocent people in Syria getting bombed etc. For me the worst sensation in this world is the feeling of deep psychological, emotional, or physical pain and I know sometimes we can use that pain to grow. The thing I think though is throughout human history we have done so much to get rid of unnecessary pain sometimes and I think that it's a good idea. If everything is all the same and nothing made a difference then what's going to stop you from getting naked tomorrow and playing in traffic? It's all the same in the end though. I know the Universe isn't going to care if you decided to get naked and play in traffic but, I'm sure you wouldn't do it because you have some common sense.

In a way you are right feeling superior to anyone isn't a winning strategy and you should look for the goodness in everyone. The thing is though with some people you don't want their negativity rubbing off on you. That doesn't mean you have to hate them but, that just means that you alone can strategize to live your own life to the fullest. I also know that in the end though we all end up expired and gone from the planet anyway so I see your point but, at least the journey can be a better one instead of one that sucked. Also once you've reached that point in your life where you are at a really good place but, other people feel like their sinking in quick sand you can be the one to throw a rope to them to pull them out instead of just stand above laughing at them and feeling superior. The part I don't like is when they are sinking and they are dragging themselves down with you. In some cases some people can realize their own faults but, let you live in a way where you can find your passions and find better people. In this case I compare it to two people stuck in a pit one person can prop up the other person so at least that person can get out of the pit. Then in return the person who is out of the pit can go search for help and get the other person who propped him out of the pit some help by bringing in a rescue team. 

[alyra]

recently I heard a deeply inspiring anecdote from a person's life. they talked about how they went to work in a farm in some country I forget which. but they would need to sheer sheep or maybe it was something similar animal. 

 

 

but they said it was the most hardest work they ever did. it just left them exhausted. there was nothing to compare to the labor and precision needed to do that. and when they complained of the stress, the effort, the pain, the discomfort, of any sort of dissatisfaction with the moment at hand. the experienced farmer they were there to work for to learn from - they'd just say, "harden up" "toughen up" - get stronger. 

 

 

 

 

 

in the OP it is mentioned "anyone traumatic or less than average childhood" and I wonder about that statement. it is misleading. I have not had a traumatic childhood. I had good parents good influences good people in my life. I got things I wanted I got time I was allowed to think and imagine and create. I was taught things and my life was carried. but was it easy? was growing up an easy thing? do I "not relate" to what is said in the OP? no I definitely relate. in many ways I know that my life has been painful and traumatizing and hurtful and depressing and de-actualizing and destructive and distracting and etc. is there anyway to compare my life to someone else's I challenge that belief. there is no way to compare two people's experiences in life. 

 

the same concepts are true for all things in life - they are easy and they are hard. what even do those words mean really - a wise woman once told me, I asked her. "what is easy how can I make things easy" and she said. "easy is whatever you make it through" and now I realize - all is just a matter of picking up my feet. moving around in the world. laying my hands upon objects. manipulating them. and repeating. and when I do that, it is easy. (note this still has meaning when it is only metaphoric) 

 

strategies of coping with X - yes, there are many many strategies that do so. if you use one strategy and it'll work fine. so look for strategies. try them out. reuse the ones that succeed. keep in mind that sometimes it's worth it to try things twice. 

 

I've offered some strats in this post if you noticed them. off the top of my head some more strats to cope include

 

yes, drink, yes, this can be dangerous. for me, it has been effective at times, tho I knew I wanted to find better strats. it was good enough in the mean time. 

videogames; books; tv; friends; eating; walks; music; ranting to self; physical outbursts; purposeful exuberance; positive thinking; negative thinking; belief in realism; identities; denial of identity; friends; bullies; being a bully; being a friend; trusting in others; avoiding others; sleeping; embracing anxiety; avoidance; spirituality; hedonism; useless debate; critical debate; being humble; being arrogant; practicing; washing dishes; sports; karate; classes; art; reminiscing; fantasizing; imagination; play-acting; doing nothing.

 

some of these I have changed to do less of in recent years compared to youthful years. others I do more now than before. it has been advised that it is smart to just experiment with different things in life. cling to what you find to succeed and work towards removing what you find to be ineffective or toxic or etc. 

 

 

 

and lastly a Really Important thing I've noticed within the last year that changed a Lot of my understanding regarding advice-seeking. is that there are things that when I was younger I would go "ugh what is that advice what an idiot and asshole they don't understand!" and then lateron in life just completely flip-turned and said the exact same words to someone else with utmost earnest intention of helping and being kind and understanding. And so I realized - words just do not carry meaning at all. they are only symbolic. when another person uses a word, they have some symbol that, for them, carries nice positive things in some way. generally speaking I mean, sometimes yeah people do be mean on purpose with understanding of delivering destruction. but - if someone appears to be thinking they are giving good advice, they probably are - and if you can't see it as good advice, no need to worry over it. but if you do want to figure out how they could be meaning in good intention, experiment, contemplate it, ask questions, etc. explore things. the most dangerous thing in the world really IMO is learned helplessness - believing that you are not in control of your experiences. I mean sure sometimes you cannot - you are a dog locked in a cage and random shocks are hurting you and there's nothing you can do but wait it out. and sometimes you do get fooled into thinking the cage is still locked the next day when secretly it was unlocked, and you are too defeated to try the lock to open it... so sad story. so this is why you always try. chance is a real factor in life, and the way to defeat it is persistence, constant vigilance. 

[faith]

9 hours ago, Revolutionary Think said:

I know it would alleviate a lot of pain in myself if I just accepted them but, I'm working on it. Somehow even though I have to come to terms with this and this is just the way the world works.

Yes, I would recommend to think this way. I have also struggled a lot with thinking that people don't achieve their potential, that the mainstream society is awful and needs a lot of improvement, that we could do so much better if only we applied ourselves. This may be true in reality, but if you think that way, you are not actually bitter about society, you are bitter about yourself, and the number one lesson in true happiness is to love yourself. Once you love and accept yourself, you will sink into a quiet and modest grace that realizes things are the way things are, and that, in fact, there are many great things out there, but the bitter mind was too blind to see it. And you will also see that you can't help people, they have to find their own way. 

 

10 hours ago, Revolutionary Think said:

I find the greatest injustice of all to be bringing someone into the world and abandoning and/or abusing them because they never gave permission to be born... if you catch my drift. We all know we live in a world that doesn't care, we see innocent people in Syria getting bombed etc. For me the worst sensation in this world is the feeling of deep psychological, emotional, or physical pain and I know sometimes we can use that pain to grow.

I know what you mean, just the other day, a co-worker of mine showed me an ultrasound of conjoined twins, who were attached via thorax. He said that the lady who was fertilized was about 10 weeks pregnant, and upon learning that it would be conjoined twins, decided to have an abortion. I thought, personally, she should have kept the baby because abortion, to me, sounds wrong. But I am not in her shoes, I don't know the kind of life it would be for her and her baby. So my point is, even though I feel this great injustice was done to this life, and that I somehow feel uncomfortable about it, I also see that the lady has her reasons, and that life is a complicated platform, and saying "this is wrong" only hinders my growth. 

 

10 hours ago, Revolutionary Think said:

If everything is all the same and nothing made a difference then what's going to stop you from getting naked tomorrow and playing in traffic? It's all the same in the end though. I know the Universe isn't going to care if you decided to get naked and play in traffic but, I'm sure you wouldn't do it because you have some common sense.

Again, this is all-or-nothing thinking. If nothing truly matters, it doesn't mean that you are going to kill your parents and say "well, nothing really matters, and I don't really care what happens to me and to them". If you accept all of life as it is, something interesting will happen, you will start appreciating it more, rather than giving it the cold shoulder. A person who is happy with themselves and accepts all of life has gratitude. A person who is not happy with themselves will struggle with accepting all of life, and fight with bitter attitude to strengthen their beliefs. Which one of these do you aspire to be?

[EmilyCook26]

Im not sure. As I choose to attachment parent my children. Maybe it is something you should look into? Its not the mainstream way of parenting. 

[SFRL]

What I find is that people that help you actualize majorly in one area of my life, tend to be the biggest distractors of actualization in other parts of my life. 

[Revolutionary Think]

@aryberry Well your dog in a cage analogy is the kind of thing that I experienced through most of my childhood. Even though in my opinion I was a very well behaved child unfortunately the adults in my life were not... So it all started in middle school where I felt like my school became a fascist dump that was killing my soul. Anyway I lay out my history with the education system all here http://bakshandehariel.wixsite.com/website/single-post/2016/12/30/Creating-Something-that-Lasts-Taking-You-Through-My-Past. In addition to feeling trapped with my school I felt trapped in my family life. It all felt like it was a boring re-run of a Television show. After my parents divorced it was just a civil war between them. What I wanted to do was get a job out of high school immediately. I knew that my only chance to get out of this cage was to be financially independent so I could live on my own and not have to deal with my parents constant bickering about one another. So in my community college I was tirelessly working with the career center to find a job but, they couldn't really help me since I hardly had experience (there is another paradox for young people you need job experience to get your first job).

Then starting my second year of University the unthinkable happened I lived with my mom in the hills of Bel Air, CA from 5th grade to 9th grade. I hated living up there because I felt trapped. I had no car (and of course no one under the age of 18 does) so that meant wherever I wanted to go I had to depend on my mom for rides. I was also living with my grandparents who I shared nothing in common with. I really didn't like that house and the lack of autonomy I had up there. My only escape from my frustrations with the world, family and school was through video games. At least through video games I felt like I had some form of control even if it was just a character in a video game. So a miracle finally happened in 10th grade where we finally moved from that horrid house and we were closer to the city and closer to my school. I felt so happy that I could finally walk to school and walk home it felt great. When she wanted to move back my 2nd year of University I was in shock and at that time I didn't even have a car I was taking the bus. I moved with my dad and told my dad about it and I was crying uncontrollably about it. I didn't want to talk to my mom and my dad didn't care that I didn't want to talk to my mom either. Unfortunately though I'd only see my dad on weekends and I'd still feel like I was in a cage because at that time it was the 2008 recession and I still had a lot of trouble finding a job. Then all of a sudden a year later my dad tells me him and his girl friend are moving to a one bedroom apartment and I have to move with my mom in Bel Air. I felt betrayed and angry but, had no choice. I went to live with my mom but, I quit going to Community College all together with 3 classes left to get my AA degree. All I could think about up there was how depressed I was and how unfair and evil society was. I fell into one of the biggest depressions in my life where I didn't even want to play video games or go on the internet sometimes not even eat. It kind of felt like I was just waiting to die. Sometimes I'd just be in bed staring at the ceiling and negative thoughts going through my head almost all day. The only refuge I had from my negative depressing thoughts is when I'd go to bed. Then I would just wake up have negative thoughts running through my head until I would go back to sleep again. It was one of the worst times in my entire life. 

I'm happy to say somewhere down the line my Uncle bless his soul bought me a car. I finally went back to community college finished those last 3 classes I had to graduate and finally got my AA degree. Slowly but, surely I was removing myself from my depression. With that car I didn't feel like a dog in a cage anymore. Then another miracle happened that my mom moved out of that house again and this time permanently. That really helped me feel better since we moved into a great location near a gas station, a Walgreens, a shopping mall, and a museum. A complete 180 from where I lived before and I was so happy. Even though the job I got with my AA degree was at McDonalds I was just happy to work have a job and make money. That feeling for me felt great to get a paycheck and to just do something and be busy. Eventually I went back to community college again to get my transfer credits and transferred to a University. I was also lucky enough not to have to take out any loans. I used the money I saved up to go to vacations to far away countries. When I did that I felt like the opposite of that dog in a cage. Like my destiny was finally in my own hands and I was free to do what I wanted it felt amazing. 

I graduated from that University with a BA in Communications and now I started a blog and a YouTube page that I'm trying to get off the ground. I want to use my experiences of getting over my depression and making videos to inspire more people and students who may be depressed and going through a hard time. I just don't know how to get myself and my story out there. What to do with YouTube to make myself bigger and brand myself. I am getting help though I paid for a mentor and in addition to that I paid for a program and I'm even looking into Leo's life purpose course. My life has really been a bumpy ride thus far but, I honestly think that all my worst days are behind me and I've learnt so much after all the pain I've been through. I will write more about my journey and what I'm trying to do in the self-actualization journal I started called being a hero. Anyway I rambled on and on.

What I'm really here to do is meet like minded people and make friends with them. People who want to change the world and make the most out of their lives. 

[alyra]

@Revolutionary Think

 

I am sorry for your troubles. 

 

me when I was young in grade school I was bullied all the time. I never had any friends, except the occasional one the teacher convinced to look out for me. 

When I was in high school I was intelligent. I understood things quick. I was estranged from my peers though. and I was not really academic, just clever on tests and in following what teachers said. I just went along with what I was told. 

in college it all was a crash. so many social opportunities but I kept failing at them. so much rich knowledge but I could not keep up. I didn't know how to study, and I didn't know how to keep friends. 

I graduated and found a job. lost it. found another job. lost it too. moved home, unemployed, depressed, too anxious to leave my room for 95% of the time. 

 

 

But I found out that I could find inspirational videos on Youtube, especially with Ted Talk. and I found inspirational twitch streamers, who taught a competitive game but not only that, I noticed their advice was generally applicable. and then I found leo's work too, on youtube. And a lot of the things I was exposing myself to - I noticed how they were associated with, or derivative of, thoughts I'd work with before. see, being without social, I turned inward to my mind. being without studying, I turned to games for the emotional journey fantasy brings. and these introspections and explorations set me up powerfully to work on self actualization. many ideas from my past started to cascade into eachother, fitting together in brilliant ways. 

 

there are many pains in my life, mostly social pains, angers at other people, disappointment, enemies and bullies and negligence. but now I look back and think how wonderful it was to have learned from my past, to have been able to understand myself better and empathize with others through contemplation. Any cages I've been under where cages I created - even if I was unaware and blameless for it. in fact I was unaware, and it does not make sense to blame me or anyone. In a way, I wonder if this is what is meant by your idea of de-actualization.  traps that we fall into, unknowingly and unaware. walls that spring up, with a hidden ladder behind a secret door. or maybe it is a dirt wall and we haven't figured out we can just pile the dirt until we're out. And when we do get free of our cages - we have learns something more deeply than people who get it by advice, or people who never need to learn that lesson just because they're lucky. 

 

 

and like you mention we are not alone. everyone one of us has some thing which has held us back, and something which still holds us back. and we'll all encounter down turns in our growth in the future too. 

 

It is true that the mystic tells us to look within. and I agree with the power there is in that - it is almost as if we are asleep without it. but it is also true that we can look outward too. I am noticing a lot lately how common it is for people who have success or enlightenment to refer to mentors, teachers, advisers of some kind. someone who has been places and comes with wisdom to share from it. in a way we are too. we all are a wise human as well as a foolish one - and we grow the fastest when we grow together. 

 

lately I have heard someone recommend that if you cannot find a job, volunteer. so I am looking to volunteer now. well, really I have held myself back due to a circumstance in life, I am waiting to resolve first. I shouldn't have to wait to get out there and look for opportunities, but sometimes we are too stuck in our self-created mirages to make such a leap, and that is perfectly fine. A mentor I follow says often, some people do it fast and others take longer and that's OK. 

[alyra]

@Revolutionary Think

 

I guess in a way I am lucky - I have felt trapped by my parents too. but for me, it was obvious by watching them, that they were trying to help, they gave me shelter for free and gave me money to buy food at let me hide in my room as I recovered from losing my job. and they went to an adviser to learn about autism. so even though the things they'd do made me feel so trapped in my room, and so worthless, and I felt gaslighted and manipulated by them... I knew in my heart that they were trying to help. and at this time too was when I found Leo and his words of - it's you who changes your life, and I believed him. I wanted to be self-sufficient, and so hearing him tell me I could be self-reliant was inspiring. And so despite feeling trapped, I saw that I could work to figure out how to get out. and so I kept pushing and kept going. 

The things which trapped me in my youth were not the same as things which trapped me as a young adult. and so I was not tricked by the dog cage nearly as effectively as many people are - because there Was change already, and change which I had enacted. I had taught myself how to communicate with others. and also, with bullying - I had watched as it turned from me getting bullied by the words of others, to me using those same words - no harsher words - to bully myself. 

 

So I had direct experience with how I do affect my own self - and in my learned helplessness, I still had the seed of hope in enacting change through my own work. it's surprising to realize this - how lucky I have been to see this insight on my own, that when mentors like ted talks and leo came along, I believed in them and was inspired to try. 

[Arkandeus]

all of it is pain and suffering. 

there is nothing wrong with the way world is. 
but there is nothing wrong with the way you view the world either, it's part of your spiritual growth to go through this negativity

the first step to enlightenment is realizing the gap between your current intelligence and the intelligence of the universe, which is infinite. 
not only to humble yourself, but open your mind to new perspective. 

the world as it is, is an empty circumstance, you assign the meaning you want to it, the illusion is that one might think that the world has inherent meaning and you're merely observing what's going on. 
This is the illusion most of us are under. 
You are the creator. You can see the glass as half full or half empty, this is really what this stuff comes down to. Positive or negative. 
You can chose to see the bad in the world and believe in that or you can chose to see the good and believe in that. 

the problem is that negativity is of lower intelligence, it leads to fear, distinction, separation, conflict and self-violence and violence. 
While positivity is of higher intelligence, it leads to open-mindedness, connection, exploration,curiosity, clarity. 

it's hard to get this, if you don't get how deep and overwhelming the meaning you assign to the world shapes your awareness of it. 
I've done a lot of psychedelics so I explored states of being where I felt completely peaceful, sometimes in complete bliss, in the same world that I thought was so shitty. How could I feel so good if the world was so ''fucked up'' as I used to think? 

it made it easier for me to realize the deep impact my view of the world has on the way I experience it. 
I'm a thousand miles away from needing psychedelics to feel good about the world now,I can assure you that if you open your heart and your mind, to positive definitions about the world, you will be amazed by the things you will understand. 

this world is amazing, but it takes you to raise your intelligence to get why it is, it takes you to raise your sensibility, so it takes you to raise your spiritual vibration and you will get all that.  
You need to grow spiritually to get what's going on and why it's going on. 

it's a matter of trust, you can't make these spiritual insights come down to you if you keep believing in negative stuff that you make you feel bad. 
this knowledge won't flow down to you while you're hanging on these dark ideas about the world. 
first you need to release these concepts, and be in a state of openness, a state of not knowing. 
to be able to be in a state where you consciously know that you don't know shit about the world and about what's going on in it is the highway to spiritual growth. literally

objectively you are not wrong, if the world feels shitty to you then it is shitty. but know that the world is not a static circumstance, it could be an amazing place, you are the one creating your awareness of the world....the world could feel amazing or it could feel shitty, there is no truth,there is no right or wrong, you chose how the world is, that's your power as a creator of your own reality. 

I really mean it, I had a few months where my mantra, my way of growing was constantly repeating to myself : ''I don't know shit, I don't know anything, I don't know shit about what's going, I have not a single clue what is going on, I know nothing, nothing at all, I know nothing, call me Jon snow'' 

slowly as I practiced a humble state of not knowing did I start to actually know more. 

you have to be humble and open-minded to receive knowledge from your higher self. 

how can you grow spiritually if you think you've got the world figured out? where is the space to grow if you think you know everything about how the world works?
How could you possible learn something new if you think you're on to everything? be aware of that

Edited April 7, 2017 by Arkandeus

[Revolutionary Think]

@aryberry Well there's two ways we can go about this stuff right now. We can either look back and feel sorry for ourselves and look at the present and the future and be glad that we learned from the experience. Even though I know it's not healthy I sometimes look back and ask why it had to be me and why it couldn't be different. I ask what I did to deserve such a thing but, we all know that the Universe is indifferent to that question and the Universe has existed for thousands of years with out us. I too find myself looking for inspirational content online that makes me happy and gives me a sense of hope and purpose. The problem is though once the video ends I'm still here in front of my computer staring at a screen and nothing has really changed in my life. What I really want is to get in contact with that person who's talking or giving that piece of advice or information once I contact them I can explain my own situation and get something specific from them into how I can change it. I think that the best thing that can be done right now since this forum hopefully has some high consciousness people is to somehow put our heads together and help each other out. For example in this post I talked about the negatives like the de-actualizers and how much of a pain in the neck my past was. So I think I'll switch gears and talk about something uplifting. For example my whole life I kind of wanted to get my name out there and turn myself into a brand I wanted to change the way the system works through that. My first step was to create a YouTube account. So I just didn't sit there and just think about it in my head. I had that YouTube page for about 9 years now. The problem was it wasn't getting any attention so I decided to join a program very recently the start of this year to help me go viral. It's been an interesting journey and this program had a bootcamp with specific things to do. I did those things and did em well and low and behold my graded project for the bootcamp got an exceptional rating and just Yesterday everyone was telling me I was among one of the winners. Then after that I got so happy and overjoyed I got the mentorship I was ecstatic. Then after that I found out I didn't win (mind you this happened Yesterday) turns out the reason I and others thought I won is when you search for your name it turns up in green (that's the color of the people who won) and one guy who searched for my name saw it in green that made everyone else search for my name and me and those other people saw it in green. Anyway I eventually found out I wasn't picked so I was annoyed. The good news is that they'll be picking more additional people to get mentored than just those people who won so I still have hope. Even if I don't get picked my content is always improving and getting better.

So as you can see I'm trying to switch gears here and maybe I'll open up a whole other topic on where we are in our lives and the tangible steps we can do to take action that sometimes we are too scared or lazy to take. This really should be going on in the schools as well. Anyway watching Leo's stuff is inspiring and all but, I think that this forum would be where the real change happens because when Leo is talking I can't talk back to him (although he anticipates that when he says that we'll say well oh Leo...) so in that case since I got all my frustrations out there and can put in what actions I'm trying to take, what happened when I took them, what I learned when I took those actions, and strategizing for better actions in the future. What do you think? /

@Arkandeus and @Leo Gura  Does this video explain all the stuff you encounter with psychedelics? 

 

[godisthedevil]

That drug video was good!

[Revolutionary Think]

BTW @Salaam the 9th post here is my story. The main reason I joined this forum is to find people with either similar stories or pain in their past who I could relate to. Then I want to take everything I learn to do some public speaking and speak about important topics to help others. 

[Salaam]

32 minutes ago, Revolutionary Think said:

BTW @Salaam the 9th post here is my story. The main reason I joined this forum is to find people with either similar stories or pain in their past who I could relate to. Then I want to take everything I learn to do some public speaking and speak about important topics to help others. 

Nice man, I felt your pain, but also your courage and determination in those posts. It makes me happy to see you've made your way out of those cages and are well on your way to forging your own road

And I know what you mean about looking for like minds. The wounded healers, the scarred... those who have felt the pain and fire, but rather being twisted by it, they've been tempered and made stronger, more dedicated and determined to change things for the better.

I'm the same way. My wife and I even have a little radio show we do together that's based on practical healing and development in relationships, from people who have been in the trenches. You might like it (this episode was our very first one, it's about how to protect and nurture in both the good times and the hardest and most stressful. It's something I wish my parents and more would have practiced).
 

 

Edited April 10, 2017 by Salaam

[Revolutionary Think]

@Salaam Thanks and this is a video I did on Democratic Schooling. 

 

[Revolutionary Think]

@Leo Gura Do you agree with Harris? 

  

Edited April 13, 2017 by Revolutionary Think