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309 Unbelievable!


About Salaam

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  1. No problem. I guess a clearer answer to your question would be my energy "ends" and the world's "begins" in the zone upon which the edges of their different patterns interact and change in response to each other. It's like... you have a long piece of rope and in one section of the rope you have an alpine butterfly knot and in another section you have a farmers loop. Even though they are made out of the same stuff and a part of the same length of rope they have difference, in their shape, position, and patterning. And because of that difference they can now interact in different ways and again change in shape when they interact with each other. Maybe looping around each other to form a doubly reinforced scaffold knot that also effects other parts of the rope, because you've now formed a larger loop by connecting these two sections of the same stuff together. That's kind of how energy works, but across a multitude of different dynamics, dimensions, and inter-relations. So, take that same rope analogy and then magnetize the rope and then attribute different chemistries and characteristics that affect attraction and repulsion and pressure and solidity and permeability and conductivity all based on each section of the ropes shape, position, and patterning. Each bump, each ridge, of difference creates a slightly nuanced contrast in relation to each other. Much like skin differentiations determine sensitivity on the human body (the most sensitive places on a human are the places with the most nuance, like the vagina for instance or the tongue which are filled with bumps and ridges, each one slightly different and providing contrast between each other, to create a synergy for greater sensitivity and expressions of sensation). So, the way I see it, energy is not about complete separation, but instead how different patterns and shapes interact and how that interaction can be discovered and applied throughout life. There are forces that generate depending on these different characteristics and the contrast of their interactions create cascades that directly impact our quality of existence. Some people may just want to say well it's all rope and be done with it, but me, I make the rope dance and form shapes and interactions beyond anything I've ever dreamed possible. And others in their own way do the same, like that surgeon who learned the intricate patterns of the human hand, in order to repair yours and help you regain the form and function of the unique pattern that is a part of you It's amazing really, the way the universe works. I see it's foundations nested in every single facet of existence. The world teaches me, my body teaches me about it constantly, releasing new understandings and new challenges that build and synergize with each other, creating a domino effect of change inside me. It's fucking brutal sometimes, but also beautiful.
  2. Cool, thanks for staying so civil amid the differences we may or may not be expressing As to your question, first I would differentiate what you mean by end and begin. I personally don't believe in "hard" endings and beginnings, whereby it is believed that there is nothing before a beginning or after an ending. I believe in "soft" endings and beginnings which are transitions from one change to another via shifts in the orientation of energetic patterns across multiple levels, layers, and fields. Shifts in position, rather than absolute creation or destruction. Second, I ascribe to superposition, where things can be overlapped or superimposed on top of each other and interact while still maintaining distinction. We can have difference or distinction without separation and further there are degrees of separation that also overlap and interact. A real life example would be a metal and a magnet, held close but apart. On one level they are separated with a physical distance between them, but on the field level, they are very much connected and interacting as is shown by the magnetic pull bringing them to snap and attach together. So with that said, I see my energy as a distinct, but connected part of the energetic mixture. I have localized emanations and the world has localized emanations that mix and interplay depending on a specific context. Some emanations have greater permeability and range then others and some orientations of energy have greater solidity, creating difference and greater potentiality via their interaction. Basically, in my view the initial frame of your question, has flaws in it's dynamics and flexibility that kind of "choke" you out of finding a solution that is both universal and specific without conflict (it's a very common flaw in much of humanities so called paradoxes). And that means that as humans we have to develop our inner capacities to be able to approach these questions with evolved forms of sensitivity and differentiation (to find subtle nuance), multi-dimensionality (so we are considering all the different layers and levels and fields), traction or self-restraint (so we can handle the tension of our question without immediately snapping and attaching to a limited conclusion), and a bunch of other things that would take longer to write out.
  3. I used to say stuff like that to myself. I used to cause myself so much pain, thinking that no woman would ever want to be with me. I spent so much of my life alone, hating the way I looked, despairing over who I was, and whether anyone would want to be around me. I even tried the martyrdom self-talk and fixed mindset you wrote above. It's such a shitty reality to have as your "normal", filled with so much anguish and pain... I hate that people are going through that. We have to be the change, we seek. Push the boundaries of what's rare and make it normal. I do it all the time, nearly everyday, it's possible. I know that space your in well. If I can build from zero, you can too. If you can care you can love. Appreciation, desire, gratitude, sharing, if you can do all of those with another you can love. You may not be able to feel it, but it's there. Buried underneath the pain and the doubt in your own little Pandora's Box of the heart. There are people out there that will find you fascinating. That will want to know and see and experience all the different sides of you. They will love the expressions you make, how you feel about things, what drives you, and one day your dreams and joys will be theirs and their dreams and joys will be yours. You'll build a life together and create your own little world and home and look back on all the pain and gently place your hand to your heart and smile. Feeling the old scars, but also all the love and warmth that now float around them. I look forward to the day that happens for you and I'll hold hope for it, even if right now it hurts too much for you to do so
  4. You know what I've found to be most helpful, dynamic, and real when it comes to the concept of "best"? It's the concept of the goldilocks zone or life zone. The zone that has the degree and level of synergy to best support the particular context of human life and the planet earth. Personally, I take that concept of the goldilocks zone and apply it to my own body, creating a dynamic, ever-changing, tensile, but stable eco-system of synergy and harmony within myself that best supports and constructs the life I want.
  5. Okay, if we want to get right down to the bottom, let's just cut to the chase in how this discussion or whatever will probably evolve. I've had it enough times on here with people to somewhat narrate the usual steps. It's most likely going to end up being we agree to disagree if it stays civil, or I'll somehow piss you off with the way I state things and it'll devolve and completely derail the thread I "believe" the world exists beyond the observations of my mind, that there are actions you have to take, nuance you have to sense, and resistance you have to face to adapt, change, create synergy, gain influence and then exert influence. Just sitting there, believing whatever, thinking everything is nothing or an illusion, can impact your rapport with the world or how you relate to it, but it does little beyond that. We have to be more physical, active, and involve our senses as well as our mind in order to spur change within us and outside us. Maybe you "believe" differently and will then say something like well prove it in some absolute sense. And then I'll say, static absolutes violate dynamic integrity via the uncertainty principle and also add that humans are overly attached to that paradigm because of an emotional extremism and rigidity of thought on an electromagnetic level (a mental tensile resiliency most people lack). All the proof I personally need is in it's consistent repeat-ability, stability, patterning, and the strength of change I create and success I enjoy by adapting and having the very tools to form and become whatever the hell I want in ways most of the world doesn't seem to have the same access to. Basically, I've had way too much success and growth and experience validating my approach and view to give any credence to the philosophy of nothingness or the primacy of consciousness or whatever you want to call it. Most people on here are coming from a place of scarcity and the consciousness primacy stuff sounds great to them, compared to what they currently have, but I've got way too much personal abundance to find such a position attractive. I mean it's not like I'm just dismissing it out of hand. I've investigated it, but have out-grown it years ago, and moved on to even deeper and more real things (in my estimation and deep experience).
  6. @Annetta I think you're just lying to yourself right now, to make things feel a little better. And you're minimizing how amazing love can be and then writing it off as something most people will never have to make it seem less attainable to protect yourself. Some people call it auto-rejection, it's an avoidant coping mechanism. See, I read the stuff you wrote here when you were more honest with your pain and I hear stuff my wife might have said to herself about being too intense and too sensitive. I've already been through that stuff with women and seen the layers peeled back and the hurts healed, so the real, honest, healthy and deeply loved woman shows herself. Anyways, I say that to protect the girl inside you who still dreams and yearns for something more. Hopefully, you keep that dream for something more... but whatever you didn't ask me to care about that part of you. So, even though I do (for you and all people), I'll keep it to myself.
  7. @Nahm I've tried shrooms, didn't like them. Drug wise ecstasy was much better, don't need either of them now, because I can naturally create euphoria states that are much more pleasurable and healthier. So be honest, when that actually happened at 13 did you feel relief, gratitude, appreciation when you gained full functioning of that hand? Do you recognize that it was the surgeon who put all that time and effort understanding the nuances specific to human biology that afforded you the regaining of that functioning? You didn't just take some mushrooms or change your beliefs and poof your hand was back to what it was. It is not all "beliefs". Objective reality does exist and it has an impact on what you can and cannot do and what you can and cannot access. "Beliefs" themselves are internalization's chemically coded with their own chemistry, their own degrees of attraction and repulsion and their degrees of resistance and acceptance. If your internal senses were sensitive enough and your brain processing was fast enough you would be able to feel and track those internalizations in real-time across multiple sub-conscious layers mapping out their inter-relations (that's how I have this information). And no, not all mystics, scientists, etc. are saying nothing is there. In fact, what they say is that emptiness isn't there. Voids, vacuums, etc. are not actually empty. They are filled with all kinds of different fields, fields we can tangibly feel and use for our development if we're sensitive enough and can handle the connective tension.
  8. @Nahm I bet if someone took a hammer to your hands and broke your bones you'd feel different. And then if a doctor could reconstruct those very same bones so you could write and work and provide for your family you'd feel different. The point being, arm-chair philosophy and emotional platitudes provide jack shit in benefit when it comes to dealing with real things in the real world.
  9. Contradictory information, usually means that there is a dynamic in play that requires balancing and nuance. Without that balance and nuance, then things appear to contradict or swing from one extreme to another. For both health and personal development (which of course includes health) you have to understand the context and application of each particular instance. That's why this blind "accept everything", "everything is an illusion", no nuance, extremist bullshit is so limited and unhelpful in real life. You have to have nuance and specificity, so you understand context, and the right balancing action to apply. It's not that things like saturated fats or fear are evil. It's about when and where to apply them and direct them so they are constructive and healthy when present.
  10. Jesus... this thread makes me sad. And people who don't know shit about love, trying to give other people harmful, horrible advice about it makes me angry. Anyways, what makes me feel loved by my Wife? God, she's so amazing. I feel so happy just thinking about her. She loves me in so many ways and each one feels like a river, connecting me to her, filling and strengthening this ocean that is our connection. There is a letter she taped to the mirror of our bathroom that I read almost every morning. She wrote it to me, telling me how I am her home and her rainbow, providing light and color for her world. By next January that letter will have been on my mirror for two years. I tell her often how much that letter means to me and how sometimes I re-read the letter as if I'm the one who wrote it about her, because I feel the exact same way about this wonderful woman. When she went on a trip and we were away from each other for a little over 2 weeks she hid love notes all around the house for me to find. Each day I would find and read one and on the last day, before she came home I put them all together and made a little shrine for her. Buying some flowers to put in the middle, turning the gift of love she gave me into a gift of love we could share together. She expresses her love in so many ways. Through her writing, through all the kisses and hugs throughout the day, her enthusiasm to be with me, her trust and confidence in me, her deep passion and hunger for me, and through her deep care about me as an individual outside of our relationship together. She understands me and loves me for who I am, as well as what I give and mean to her. That's the beauty of a shared love between two people. You get to live and build a life with someone, sharing in the love, desire, appreciation, gratification, gratitude, hope, humor, and meaning that is inside the both of us. Giving it, receiving it, joining it together to create amazing moments and experiences. Love is fucking amazing!!! Why wouldn't you want to have someone in your life that you could trust enough to share and play with such feelings? And it just keeps getting better and better as the years go on! The more we love, the more love we have to give, and the more we do in creative and awesome ways! She is the person I trust most in the world, the first person I want to share with, and the person I want to wake up to and go to bed with each and everyday. Fuck, just thinking about our life together makes me so happy!!! I can't wait to get home and wrap her up in my arms and breathe her in. My body aches to feel her energy.
  11. @Steph1988 I get what you're saying there are dissonances that can sometimes come into play when entering different flow-states and emotional landscapes that one isn't accustomed to. Depending on the flavor and intensity of dissonance it can be enough to keep a person from sustaining that state or even kick them out at on-set, generating a kind of flinch/rejection response. But, it seems yours is relatively mild and the pleasure/satisfaction is hopefully automatic enough to kind of lock it in place for you as it naturally expresses itself. As for your final question, yes it's definitely a meaningful step, a foundational shift that allows for a wider range of capability. A person is limited from a lot of experiences, emotional ranges, and capabilities if they are overly enmeshed with their mind, in comparison to their senses (especially when it comes to physical expressions of intent). Long-term exposure to this status will have physical affects on the shape of our brain and how we're wired, which will dictate the cycle or pattern of our thoughts and feelings and consequently the choices we make and things we do with our lives. Luckily, we can shift this position over time and bring ourselves back into a balance of activity between both sides. For instance, you mentioned that you tested out as INTJ, and 10 years ago I most likely would have tested out similarly, but I took a quick test this morning and I showed to be ENFP-A. I don't put too much stock into that label, because I am still just as able to be analytical and systems-based as before, but now I also have access and capability with the other side of the spectrum. I have a best of both worlds or all worlds, because of taking the time to develop that balance and synergy with both sides. That's a key difference from just being some guy who was always more sensing based, as opposed to thinking, trying to tell others to be more involved with their bodies. (@Joseph Maynor I believe the two paragraphs above touch on that concern of constant negative talk. With the solution being long-term change creating a physical shift in the wiring and composition of your brain and other parts of your body)
  12. Personally, I find that kind of discourse from so-called gurus to be offensive to my sense of balance and reality. Resistance is just as much a part of life as acceptance. A person is incomplete and incapable if they ignore one over the other in either case. If you have an immune system your body practices resistance. If you have a system for internalization, your body practices acceptance. I think it's safe to say nearly or possibly every single thing in existence practices both, or at the very least every complex system does. -Attraction, acceptance, trust, internalization -Repulsion, resistance, doubt, rejection Both sides are necessary to life. And both sides over-lap and feed into each other. You ever wonder why people on here, do the whole non-acceptance thing, get blissed out, and then a month later come back complaining that they have no motivation for anything? It's because motivation involves and requires a quality of pressure, whether positive or negative. And pressure requires resistance and tension, whether positive or negative. You ever play video games with god mode on? I bet once the novelty fades you don't find it as fun or stimulating as it was when you played without it. Why? Because there is no more resistance, no risk, you're invulnerable. Which makes the struggle lose meaning, as you are no longer stretching your capacities or testing yourself to survive. Or to look at it another way. Do you know how boring it would be to deadlift 135lbs every workout after lifting 535 lbs? It's so easy it means nothing. It's just warm-up weight and isn't going to do anything for growth. There is no stretching of our capacities, no new territory outside of our comfort zone with that kind of weight.
  13. @Steph1988 If left to my own devices I'm like 60%-70% Sensing and 30-40% Thinking. Those ratios change if I'm at work, which is more like 50/50 or 60/40 towards thinking. I don't have that monkey-mind, constant chatter thing most people have. Years ago that changed and it felt like the actual volume of my thoughts turned down, so what mental talk I do have comes as a faint, far-away whisper that's a lot less obtrusive. Plus, I feel electromagnetism at all times on top of normal sensations so I'm rarely as fully immersed/enmeshed within thought as I used to be. I prefer this way of living to the other way, because you waste less time with stories about why things may be a certain way and the circular thinking that comes from it. It makes you more active and focused on the physical manifestations that deal with creating change in life. You know where the firewalls are or adaption points that people mentally shy away from because of their tension and stress and just face them. And you understand that things like creative thoughts, eureka moments, and realizations are actually the verbalization or story behind positive bodily shifts. So you just skip all the searching and go straight to creating different shifts and let your brain sort and narrate it out as needed in the background. I guess you could say that my brain is not the dominant seat of my consciousness. It shares that seat equally with my instincts, senses, intuition, etc.
  14. What is the balance for you in an average day? How much of your day is spent lost in thought, compared to consciously engaging with your 21 senses? Feeling the twisting currents of the air, smelling the heat of summer, the taste of your saliva, the sound of your breathing, seeing colors, experiencing the different gradients of pressure in our bodies, the different levels of magnetism, body positioning, thirst, hunger... How much you exercise and consciously engage with your senses, determines the strength of connection you have to them versus thought. I'm not saying one or the other is better, I'm saying a balance and constructive synergy between them is better.
  15. Maybe the problem isn't so much in the finding of pleasure through activities, but that you're dealing with something that is blocking you inside or weighing on you inside, that is keeping you from taking pleasure in life?