50% Of Men Have Not Approached A Woman The Last Year

[flowboy]

17 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

@CARDOZZO yes I am approaching the girls in my class but not strangers .

The right move is to make friends with them and become a social leader who hosts gatherings, save cold approach for the strangers.

Do not direct approach classmates unless you are very sure that they're already into you and are just waiting for you to seal the deal.

[Jacquelope]

On 11/22/2023 at 0:43 PM, CARDOZZO said:

Guys here on the forum...

Are you approaching woman?

 

If I was single, I wouldn't see the benefit of doing so. Why am I going to feed a woman's ego at the detriment of mine? And if someone goes on a spiel about how rejection doesn't hurt and you gotta man-up and tough it out, that's where I'm just going to tune that out as background noise. If 50% of men are at my side on this then I really don't have to listen to that - the revolution is already on and if I was single I'd be on that side.

I honestly wouldn't want to deal with a cowardly woman who's too scared or too self-entitled to make the first move.

Besides? My wife approached me first, and she wasn't the first to do so.

 

Edited November 24, 2023 by Jacquelope

[Jacquelope]

On 11/22/2023 at 11:41 PM, Tenebroso said:

It's not worth it for most men. Even for attractive men, women have lost their mystique and allure, we see them clearly now and you can't unsee their true nature once you see it. The cat is never going back into the bag.

Women aren't at the level where you can't unsee what their true nature is, but they certainly jumped MANY steps in that direction after Tinder hit big. Things have gotten a LOT more transactional since then. Things will never get better, not even offline. ESPECIALLY offline.

Love isn't dead post-Tinder but it is on  ventilator and dying of spiritual COVID.

 

Edit: @flowboy , your post is so unbelievably based.

 

Edited November 24, 2023 by Jacquelope

[flowboy]

25 minutes ago, Jacquelope said:

based.

That's the language of someone who wastes too much time on the internet, as the rest of your post attests. I don't know what that word means, but I take it as a compliment

 

[Jacquelope]

33 minutes ago, flowboy said:

That's the language of someone who wastes too much time on the internet, as the rest of your post attests. I don't know what that word means, but I take it as a compliment

 

Well I speak as a Gen-X'er, someone who spent the first decades of my life with zero internet experience and drowning in street life, which colors everything that I write. As for Based, it means based in reality, real talk, that kind of thing.

"Most of these social skills you are building get you further and furher away from your real self." wasn't the only sentence that knocked it out of the ballpark but this is an essential af caveat that must be attached to ANY talk about social skills whatsoever. To thine own self be true.

[flowboy]

@Jacquelope  Lol, I take it back then. I thought "based" was some weird insult and never bothered to look it up. Thanks for setting me straight and sorry for the stab.

[Cocolove]

Just did my first cold approaches today. I had been in a relationship since 3-4 years ago, when I was still a minor so I never had a chance.

Now after 1.5 months of no contact I feel like I'm over it enough to start. Feels good.

The first one was a really nice conversation but she had a boyfriend. The second one just 10 seconds in said she was focusing on something and couldn't talk. 

The anxiety melts away once you actually say the first thing. And even then it's really not that hard, but I have never been very scared of social awkwardness.

[numbersinarow]

On 11/22/2023 at 10:05 PM, CARDOZZO said:

Competition is lower each year, no matter how painfully ugly you are.

If you want to build a family, you'll need to figure out.

Why is the competition lower? Because women are conditioning anyone who isn't pre-determined to be someone with opportunities who at the same time meets a physical characteristic standard who at the same time is submissive to them, to think they have 0 worth to them. And they are in fact right, of course, you have ZERO worth to women as a male who wasn't pre-determined to be a winner in terms of sex.

Come on man, you know they would reject you or anyone, that's how hypergamy and misandry work.

[numbersinarow]

On 11/23/2023 at 6:39 PM, NoSelfSelf said:

@flowboy whats messed up is wanting to be like a woman, to be approached and stand on your looks thats messed up 😉

So you either think women are inferior or you think men should conform to socially constructed gender roles.

It wouldn't make you less attractive either, from her perspective you're just not approaching for whatever reason or because you didn't get to since she approached you first.

If women risk way less by approaching, why infantalize them?

[numbersinarow]

On 11/24/2023 at 0:48 AM, Jacob Morres said:

50% have 0?? 

Damn now for the individual you could say that's a good thing, as your competition is quite ass lol 

You would want them on the hamster wheel and pointlessly wasting effort instead, if you were sexually successful.

[Rishabh R]

By the way last year I approached 56 girls and got a one blowout. Also that totals up to near about 76. Which is the amount of girls I approached in my life including random + known girls. @nhoktinvt that's ok. However, I fear  approaching random strangers because guys here are too insecure and threatening.And also I said "I love you " to 3 girls in my life. Thank you guys for the appreciation.

Edited November 25, 2023 by Rishabh R

[CARDOZZO]

On 24/11/2023 at 8:33 AM, flowboy said:

I'm Computer Scientist too.

Yeah if you want to get laid a bunch all of that makes sense.

But if you want to find the right one, it totally doesn't.

And here's why:

(I came to this conclusion after meeting the right one after some years of believing the pickup narrative that says: "you need to practice so that you have the skills when you meet the right one", which is BS propaganda to market pickup stuff)

1. Most of these social skills you are building get you further and furher away from your real self.
   At best, when you meet the right one, she's going to have to dig through all those stupid pickup habits and ignore them until she finds out who you really are.
   At worst, she'd be turned off by them, and you missed out on the real thing by training yourself to click with the average random woman you'd meet on the street or in a bar.
2. If your goal is in fact to find the right one to settle down with, that's going to require you to be on track with your life purpose.
   Because when you meet her, you need to be an "interesting" guy.
   Just being a computer scientist who picks up a lot of girls, is not interesting, unless there's some unique ambition that ties it all together, which you're serious about.
   Your free time should be going to that, instead of cold approach.
   Because if you're spending significant time cold approaching and going on dates with rando's (more than a couple hours a week), you're probably slacking off on your life purpose.
   Becoming a man of value requires more than just doing your job, or just doing your studies. Way more.
   (If you're already being exceptional and actively creating a unique life path in your free time, then scratch this one, it doesn't apply to you)
   But most 20 somethings aren't, they are wasting precious time to "become good with girls" (read: fuck a lot), and then end up as 30 somethings with a very average and boring story, and advanced social skills that let them sleep with any random girl but repel any serious matches. Look at Leo. He's been doing pickup a long time, but when was the last time he was in a happy relationship? What have these social skills really gotten him, besides upping his body count?
3. If you have a real life purpose, at some point that will generate reputation value, contextual fame, or at least put your personality out there for authentic reasons, which will then attract the right matches.
   
   Example: if you're a computer scientist who is creating a company to help people with spiritual advancement using software (just picking a random tech related life purpose here from another thread), what are the chances that you're going to find a match among random club girls or on the street?
   
   Very low indeed. Like lottery ticket low.
   
   Your match in that example is probably someone who has the intellectual capacity to appreciate your ambitions, and similar values, therefore would be unlikely to be going to clubs and bars all the time.
   She'd be much more likely to have heard of you through what you're doing, perhaps you spoke at some event, perhaps you blogged something, perhaps you were a guest on a podcast and she found your social media, perhaps she was introduced to you through your extended social circle, which is made up of quality, ambitious people, not just tied together by partying and socializing habits, but actual values.
   Whatever makes sense in context of your life purpose.

In my opinion, the only useful thing that you should take from pickup, is initiative and courage.

The more awkward and unpolished the interaction, the better it is for the true matches, the more likely it is to work on your future wife.

Because it is authentic.

But you do need initiative and courage when women take indirect initiative with you.

And that's honestly not something you need to train every week. It's just something you have in your back pocket as a personal value.

What's the catch?

It's scary to take initiative.

The idea that "you need skills" is an addictive crutch.

If you would just be smooth and have the right "social skills", it would be less uncomfortable and scary, the mind reasons.

Wrong.

When you detect that this might really be a good match, and this is when it counts, not only:

- will it be just as scary as the first time

- will you have to spend extra effort to take off your smooth pickup mask which you worked so hard on building.

I'm contemplating.

Thanks for your words and POV, they matter a lot.

 

[flowboy]

3 minutes ago, CARDOZZO said:

I'm contemplating.

Thanks for your words and POV, they matter a lot.

 

Appreciate you.

[EdgeGod900]

Stopped atm, because I feel responsible for who they become afterwards. I subconsciously do things that are bad for them (materialistically and psychologically) but they love it for some  fucking reason. They keep coming back for more. Its so wierd, but also metaphysically hilarious.

Edited November 28, 2023 by EdgeGod900

[Schizophonia]

On 25/11/2023 at 9:56 AM, Cocolove said:

.

The first one was a really nice conversation but she had a boyfriend. The second one just 10 seconds in said she was focusing on something and couldn't talk. 

These are excuses to refuse your offer. Women are not just more afraid of physical confrontation than men, they are also afraid of saying something as simple as “I’m not interested.”

[Lila9]

I don't think the average man should approach random strangers women for the sake of approaching them (unless he would like to practice his social skills).

It's not about the number, the number is not important. It's about the quality of the approaches.

Because when the man is focused on quantity, it makes the man to appear as inauthentic, low value, desperate, pervert, just another annoying pick-up artist who wants to touch your tits and tell to his immature friends.

I think that it's adorable for a man to approach a woman, but only if he really attracted to her, likes her, if he has some crash on her of fell in love with her, if it's geniune, authentic, real, whatever, otherwise it's bad for both parties. 

There is a risk in approaching a woman a man likes or has crash on her, because she may reject the man, but this is the the beauty in men who are living from their masculine, they take risks in love, they don't play it safe. Because love is a risky thing, having a relationship and intimacy with another human being is a risky thing, because being vulnarble with another human it's a risky thing, and courageous, because there is always the chance to get hurt.

Love is not for the cowards, love is for the brave humans among us. This is one of the greatest truths of life.

Men who understand that, if they are interested in a woman, they will not keep it as a secret, they will approach her, even at the risk of rejection and heartbreak.

It can be either turn to a great romance or to an heartbreak, but this is what beautiful in love and in men who live from their masculine, they will take the risk and if they will be rejected they will accept the rejection politely with 0 drama and move on.

Most women love when men approach them, especially when they bring their simple and authentic self and do that without stupid jokes or openings.

[Nemra]

What if you don't have a desire for marriage or a long-term relationship?

Is that wrong? Are you less of a human?

Is approaching even appropriate in that case if most people want to be in a relationship?

Edited December 3, 2023 by Understander

[Nemra]

People are so optimistic and naïve about wanting to be in a relationship. They think that it will continue to be the same or even better. In reality, there will be fights, and your energy will be wasted on drama. This is more realistic than people would like to imagine. Traumas are a natural part of that process for most people even if they are conscious. Finding your partner brave for their masculinity or femininity will be nothing when your partner starts to psychologically abuse you.

Edited December 4, 2023 by Understander

[Rishabh R]

@Lila9 great words.