My friends are insulting me again and again

[D2sage]

Show them this.

There is a huge chance your friends have this.

Hit them where it hurts.

[Sincerity]

Fuck these "friends".

But at the same time, grow a thicker skin. If You're unsure of yourself, You are easy to troll and make fun of. What if You were like: "Yeah, I do love philosophy, because I do want to live the good life. No it's not mental jerk off, it is learning how to live well. And this Leo dude has taught me a lot. If You don't want to follow him it's fine, but I will." Be more confident! 

[Rishabh R]

Right now I am going through suffering due to rejections from past. A girl rejected me and is now with someone else. I feel badly hurt. Tomorrow is my exam- what to do ?

[DefinitelyNotARobot]

3 hours ago, inFlow said:

Dude. See YOU have close MALE friends. We don't. THAT'S A HUGE FUCKING DIFFERENCE.

If you don't have any experience when talking about this particular situation don't even stick your nose here and give us shit that our advice is toxic.

He is right though. Take it from someone who does have experience with "this particular situation". The type of relationship you've described is highly dysfunctional and manipulative and won't fulfill your needs in the long run. One day you'll wake up realizing just how lonely you are, because none of the "friends" you've made care about you. They care about the character you're playing to satisfy them and their expectations of who you are/they think you should be. You're selling yourself out for the benefit of being accepted by others, but it's not authentic acceptance, and deep down you know that. You can run from that truth, but it will catch up to you eventually and THEN you'll know what it means to be lonely.

Your whole counter to him saying that men need authentic relationships boils down to "Well I don't have those relationships, so you don't understand shit!" when he was telling you that men need these kinds of relationships, BECAUSE they usually lack those kinds of relationships. The type relationship you've described is the norm for men and it's, as @Razard86 said, one of the many reasons for why the suicide rates for men are so much higher. A lot of men take being disconnected from their emotions/the emotions of others for granted. It just fuels the problems they have.

Edited September 13, 2023 by DefinitelyNotARobot

[Schizophonia]

2 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

Right now I am going through suffering due to rejections from past. A girl rejected me and is now with someone else. I feel badly hurt. Tomorrow is my exam- what to do ?

It will pass. ?

[Yimpa]

2 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

Right now I am going through suffering due to rejections from past. A girl rejected me and is now with someone else. I feel badly hurt. Tomorrow is my exam- what to do ?

Learning to live with disappointment will grow you. Life will not always go the way you plan; you need to be willing to accept that and move forward. You will still feel hurt, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that something is wrong. Kind of like how feeling sore after an intense workout the following day is not necessarily wrong. 

This is easier said than done, of course. 

Edited September 13, 2023 by Yimpa

[Luca001]

The most straight up advice I could give:

Do things that make you feel good, such as exercising, eat healty, meditate, breathe oxygen, get sun, sleep well.

Have a vision, start working on It.

You will notice how you not only don't need those "friends" but that you also prefer not to hang out with them. By being your true self you will attract people that will really resonate with your being and they will naturally become your friends.

So, man up, fuck those friends, it's time to take responsability for your own happines. 

[Razard86]

On 9/13/2023 at 9:16 AM, DefinitelyNotARobot said:

He is right though. Take it from someone who does have experience with "this particular situation". The type of relationship you've described is highly dysfunctional and manipulative and won't fulfill your needs in the long run. One day you'll wake up realizing just how lonely you are, because none of the "friends" you've made care about you. They care about the character you're playing to satisfy them and their expectations of who you are/they think you should be. You're selling yourself out for the benefit of being accepted by others, but it's not authentic acceptance, and deep down you know that. You can run from that truth, but it will catch up to you eventually and THEN you'll know what it means to be lonely.

Your whole counter to him saying that men need authentic relationships boils down to "Well I don't have those relationships, so you don't understand shit!" when he was telling you that men need these kinds of relationships, BECAUSE they usually lack those kinds of relationships. The type relationship you've described is the norm for men and it's, as @Razard86 said, one of the many reasons for why the suicide rates for men are so much higher. A lot of men take being disconnected from their emotions/the emotions of others for granted. It just fuels the problems they have.

I'm glad you understand...also...I didn't have my first friend until my 11th grade in high school. I got picked on bullied and got into fights as a result from kindergarten to junior year. Hell some tried to bully me in the first college I went too as well. Every friend I ever made....became a life-long friend. This doesn't mean they didn't steal from me or manipulate me in some way.

I forgave every single one of them and they all changed to the best of their ability through me accepting them. It wasn't easy, because people don't like to be called out. One of my friends threatened to crash the car I was riding in with him one time (He was the driver). So all these melodramatic you don't understand my pain stuff that people like to use as a defense...it's a cop out.

I will say the same thing I have always said...'Be a friend to have a friend." What is a friend? A friend is one who forgives you when you are weak and unruly. A friend is one who calls you out even though it could end the relationship. A friend is one gives to you not to get something out of it. A friend is one who doesn't keep score and if they do...they don't hold it against you. A friend roots for you in your victories, and cries with you or at least meets you in your sorrow. A friend accepts they are imperfect and so are their friend. A friend doesn't unfriend you because you haven't communicated for years. Why? Because a true friend...is a friend for life.

^^^This is the motto I have lived by. Why? It's because it is how I wish the world would be. Be the change you want to see in the world. Why? Because if you play the same game as the world....then why are you complaining....you are only complaining about yourself!!! LOL.

Edited September 21, 2023 by Razard86

[Bandman]

@Rishabh R  You need better friends. Form a gang of people that share fundamental values. That's what true men do.