How Socialization Makes You Stupid

[Proserpina]

So are we now snubbing the feminine? Leo said in the video that the feminine is generally 'less intelligent'.  No one has said anything about that.  Normal female communication is being labelled as 'artificial sweetener' happy feeling. 

Edited September 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[Tyler Robinson]

2 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

So are we now snubbing the feminine? Leo said in the video that the feminine is generally 'less intelligent'.  No one has said anything about that.  Normal female communication is being labelled as 'artificial sweetener' happy feeling. 

[SOUL]

20 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

Normal female communication is being labelled as 'artificial sweetener' happy feeling.

I hope you aren't referring to me because I did happen to use that phrase in my reply but I made no mention of sex, gender or anything of the sort. If you interpreted it that way it's not something I said or intended to say.

[Proserpina]

9 minutes ago, SOUL said:

I hope you aren't referring to me because I did happen to use that phrase in my reply but I made no mention of sex, gender or anything of the sort. If you interpreted it that way it's not something I said or intended to say.

Sometimes the softer touch is needed in conjunction with the masculine mind to have a fully well-rounded sense of "wellbeing" that you always talk about.  

 

Edited September 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[Arcangelo]

On 9/11/2022 at 5:47 PM, Thought Art said:

I watched the whole episode

me

too

i

had

to

i

liked

it.

[SOUL]

16 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

Sometimes the softer touch is needed in conjunction with the masculine mind to have a fully well-rounded sense of "wellbeing" that you always talk about.  

 

I'm still not sure what you are talking about.

[Proserpina]

1 minute ago, SOUL said:

I'm still not sure what you are talking about.

I would appreciate a response on the merits of what I said rather than a sort of casual dismissal. The feminine is often not heard by the masculine in this manner.  

[SOUL]

4 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

I would appreciate a response on the merits of what I said rather than a sort of casual dismissal. The feminine is often not heard by the masculine in this manner.  

Can you please explain it to me because for me to respond to the merits I would have to understand what you meant. I don't understand what you are talking about so please pardon me for being so dense, have patience with me.

[Proserpina]

7 minutes ago, SOUL said:

Can you please explain it to me because for me to respond to the merits I would have to understand what you meant. I don't understand what you are talking about so please pardon me for being so dense, have patience with me.

How much effort are you making to understand another person? Are you open to a dialogue to attempt to clarify the issues that you claim here that you don't understand?  Isn't this exemplary of the way the feminine is treated by the masculine often? Disposably. The feminine perspective is being disposed before it's even heard.  

[SOUL]

3 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

How much effort are you making to understand another person? Are you open to a dialogue to attempt to clarify the issues that you claim here that you don't understand?  Isn't this exemplary of the way the feminine is treated by the masculine often? Disposably. The feminine perspective is being disposed before it's even heard.  

I'm trying to understand what you meant by saying "Sometimes the softer touch is needed in conjunction with the masculine mind to have a fully well-rounded sense of "wellbeing" that you always talk about." and not having much success in connecting it to what I originally said that you have taken offense to.

Maybe if you could explain this a little bit to help me understand instead of just continuing to accuse me of sexist behavior. I would appreciate a little help in understanding what it is you think I said and how your response applies to it because the short sentence towards it isn't enough for me to get it, I apologize for this.

 

[Proserpina]

10 minutes ago, SOUL said:

I'm trying to understand what you meant by saying "Sometimes the softer touch is needed in conjunction with the masculine mind to have a fully well-rounded sense of "wellbeing" that you always talk about." and not having much success in connecting it to what I originally said that you have taken offense to.

Maybe if you could explain this a little bit to help me understand instead of just continuing to accuse me of sexist behavior. I would appreciate a little help in understanding what it is you think I said and how your response applies to it because the short sentence towards it isn't enough for me to get it, I apologize for this.

 

I still think this is an overly dismissive reaction from my perspective.  How willing are you to listen to other people?  It shocked me that you haven't given an inch at all in terms of working to understand me.  My language is clear on its face.  It doesn't take a rocket scientist to divine what my words meant.  You chose to take a red herring route rather than to engage with me in a communication in service of wellbeing that you often say on here.  I think this is an eye opener for you for how you are recieving information from other people on this forum.

Edited September 14, 2022 by Proserpina

[SOUL]

15 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

I still think this is an overly dismissive reaction from my perspective.  How willing are you to listen to other people?  It shocked me that you haven't given an inch at all in terms of working to understand me.  My language is clear on its face.  It doesn't take a rocket scientist to divine what my words meant.  You chose to take a red herring route rather than to engage with me in a communication in service of wellbeing that you often say on here.  I think this is an eye opener for you for how you are recieving information from other people on this forum.

As I understand it now I made some comments, the point of my comments were about society as a whole and with nothing to do about sex or gender. You interpreted one piece of my comments as sexist in some way lumping it in with other people's comments.

I clarified my comment had nothing to do with sex or gender and your reply to it was about having a softer touch with a masculine mind....on a comment that was misinterpreted in a way I didn't intend it to be and it had no indications it even implied it to be that way.

So I feel like you are continuing to engage me in a discussion about something I still don't quite understand what it is we are discussing and because I don't understand, you think I've been sexist, overly dismissive and avoiding 'service to well being'.

I have made repeated efforts to ask for clarification and explanation so I can better understand and yes, serve well being but all I get is accusations of being disingenuous...my word not yours but that's what it seems like.

It certainly is an eye opener. Genuinely, my apologies if I have offended.

[Razard86]

5 hours ago, Proserpina said:

@Razard86 Don't worry about it.  You have a very loving energy that I appreciate.  I mean that sincerely, not being fake.  This forum is cool.  The people on this forum are cool, including the people who sometimes trigger me with their bluntness and masculine energy.

Yes triggering is great, I love getting triggered because for me it reveals what biases are hidden within me. I like to know my biases, and I appreciate you as well. I use every interaction to guage where I am at and I know my biggest issue is playing the teacher always trying to teach or correct, and my other issue is not always listening and reflecting back to the person what they were communicating. This comes from my own personal arrogance and my belief that my thoughts are superior or better, which served me in being an independent thinker, but also makes it harder for me to connect. 

So its a duality I have to work on, and I would very much appreciate it if people let me know hey Raz....I think you might not be listening to what I am saying. Hell you can copy and paste this quote right here and use it on me if you think I'm doing it...who knows...maybe it will trigger me? LOL. (A certain someone I know will love that invitation)

6 hours ago, Loba said:

You're fine.  You started out here with kind of having an odd vibe, but you've grown in the short time that you've been here and you provide interesting insights and a unique perspective.

 

I totally agree with this.  People who treated me badly literally lead me to God and love.  Time and time again, I always manage to grow from these experiences.  I become more creative, happier, my relationships in the real world improve, my understanding of myself improves, etc.

I hope you can do monk mode safely, I tried this for a few years - not of my own volition, but due to mental illness/after effects of a bad relationship and it kind of messed with my head/mental state a bit.

Interesting experiences, I relate. 
Later.

1. Odd vibe? I'm an acquired taste... I'm consistent...you just adjusted to my weirdness so hurray you were able to make sense from my weirdness!

2 And yes I believe the path to God is love and truth. Love is increased through suffering, I will share an insight a friend of mine had who wants to remain anonymous but it is a very interesting insight to me about why suffering exists at all. 

[Lila9]

Socialization can be fun, intresting, loving, fulfilling experience. As long as you are relatively authentic with relatively authentic people around you.

And yes, of course that at some point if one is socializing too much, especially with low quality people, it won't make him smarter.

The same with being too much alone, without socializing at all, one can freak out and get very deluded and not grounded with reality, even less intelligent, depends on what one's doing when he doesn't socialize.

I think that it's a matter of balance. It depends on how you socialize,

 with whom and how long.

I had a friend who said that what he likes about socializing is that he can see himself through people, people mirror him himself. It grounds him in reality. I disregarded what he said at the begining but later I contemplated his words with myself and I've noticed that I can learn a lot about myself merely by interacting with people.

On the other hand, what people mirror to you can be very limiting definition of yourself, full of their positive and negative projections about you. So this is why it's importent to learn about yourself outside of relationship's frame.

 

I love Leo's content and appriciate this video, although I haven't fully watched it.

It's importent to talk about how conformity distances you from Truth.

I always intuited that conformity is distracting me from something more valuable, even when being a total conformist seemed like the most valuable option that there is, I always sensed that it's only on the surface level.

 

 

[LfcCharlie4]

Agree. 

Humans are social animals for sure, modern society definitely limits community feel massively, its a shame. 

However, Leo is right in that you don't want 24/7 socialization, you need that alone time, contemplation time, reading time etc to balance it, and if anything upgrade your socialization. 

Its amazing how everything comes back to balance 

And, even more amazing that balance is actually nuanced and not the same for everyone

One person's social balance may be completely different to another and that's fine 

I think this is why studying personality & in particular your own is crucial, understand what makes you tick and what you enjoy, your blind spots & shadow too. All the talk of awakening / enlightenment work often leads to people overlooking personality and your own humanity

[Loba]

7 hours ago, Razard86 said:

1. Odd vibe? I'm an acquired taste... I'm consistent...you just adjusted to my weirdness so hurray you were able to make sense from my weirdness!

2 And yes I believe the path to God is love and truth. Love is increased through suffering, I will share an insight a friend of mine had who wants to remain anonymous but it is a very interesting insight to me about why suffering exists at all. 

What I meant was similar to what you posted to the other person above, was the vibe I was getting after interacting with you when you first got here, and I didn't have anything to really go off of because you were new, so it gave me that impression initially.  But other time I realized that, although you're very forthcoming about your opinions and experiences, that you don't have malice or any intention of doing harm or anything like that.  When people first meet someone and they are very outgoing and upfront like that, in my experience it can go both ways, and it's hard to know unless you see how the person is in a longer timeframe of interaction.  If you get what I'm saying now.  But you, like me, seem to have a pretty good grasp on yourself, where you're at, who you are and all that good stuff so more power to you.

I read the post about your friend, it was a good read.  I didn't have anything to add to it, but I agree that love can be increased through suffering.  One insight I had was that the plane of suffering is almost like on its own field, like intergenerational through war, famine, abuse and so forth, and if you can connect to and offer your love and understanding to this, then you can see that we are all interconnected, as everyone has suffered at one point in time.  Just like with Jesus and his suffering, how he understood the "sins" of mankind and washed them clean through his actions, I could see this being done by the common man through connecting to this universal place and offering some sense of solace to it, if that makes sense.

[Razard86]

3 hours ago, Loba said:

What I meant was similar to what you posted to the other person above, was the vibe I was getting after interacting with you when you first got here, and I didn't have anything to really go off of because you were new, so it gave me that impression initially.  But other time I realized that, although you're very forthcoming about your opinions and experiences, that you don't have malice or any intention of doing harm or anything like that.  When people first meet someone and they are very outgoing and upfront like that, in my experience it can go both ways, and it's hard to know unless you see how the person is in a longer timeframe of interaction.  If you get what I'm saying now.  But you, like me, seem to have a pretty good grasp on yourself, where you're at, who you are and all that good stuff so more power to you.

I read the post about your friend, it was a good read.  I didn't have anything to add to it, but I agree that love can be increased through suffering.  One insight I had was that the plane of suffering is almost like on its own field, like intergenerational through war, famine, abuse and so forth, and if you can connect to and offer your love and understanding to this, then you can see that we are all interconnected, as everyone has suffered at one point in time.  Just like with Jesus and his suffering, how he understood the "sins" of mankind and washed them clean through his actions, I could see this being done by the common man through connecting to this universal place and offering some sense of solace to it, if that makes sense.

^That was beautiful.

[Proserpina]

20 hours ago, SOUL said:

As I understand it now I made some comments, the point of my comments were about society as a whole and with nothing to do about sex or gender. You interpreted one piece of my comments as sexist in some way lumping it in with other people's comments.

I clarified my comment had nothing to do with sex or gender and your reply to it was about having a softer touch with a masculine mind....on a comment that was misinterpreted in a way I didn't intend it to be and it had no indications it even implied it to be that way.

So I feel like you are continuing to engage me in a discussion about something I still don't quite understand what it is we are discussing and because I don't understand, you think I've been sexist, overly dismissive and avoiding 'service to well being'.

I have made repeated efforts to ask for clarification and explanation so I can better understand and yes, serve well being but all I get is accusations of being disingenuous...my word not yours but that's what it seems like.

It certainly is an eye opener. Genuinely, my apologies if I have offended.

I don't understand why you are being so defensive and evasive on this SOUL?  In this whole discussion you've done nothing to clarify.  I find it disappointing and evasive that all you've done is attack.  You're not trying to meet me half way at all in any kind of substantive dialogue.  Please clarify what you meant by those words because I'm not sure you understand what you meant. 

Edited September 15, 2022 by Proserpina

[SOUL]

25 minutes ago, Proserpina said:

I don't understand why you are being so defensive and evasive on this SOUL?  In this whole discussion you've done nothing to clarify.  I find it disappointing and evasive that all you've done is attack.  You're not trying to meet me half way at all in any kind of substantive dialogue.  Please clarify what you meant by those words because I'm not sure you understand what you meant. 

All I have done is attack?

Ok, well  pardon me for whatever it is you think I have done I intend no ill will.

Peace

[Proserpina]

1 minute ago, SOUL said:

All I have done is attack?

Ok, well  pardon me for whatever it is you think I have done I intend no ill will.

Peace

You're still ignoring my several requests for clarification as to what you meant.  Rather than dialoguing, you're dismissing.  You don't want to be understood or even to discuss it, I'll leave it at that.