I don't know if I want sex or not

[Marvelllious]

@Leo Gura

I'm 17, a virgin, been doing self dev since 13 years of age and before i struggled with attraction. Now I find it easy to cold approach and speak to women.

When we are reguarding sex though, I always turn my head away. I see my semen as a form of energy. Where you put that energy is very important because you will recieve that what you've sown. I'm afraid that by fucking the wrong girl i may start to expirience problems related to Lust. I know that whore behavior is greatly supported these days because it leads to confusion for easier manupilation. And as a male i do not want to participate in that cause. At the same time i do speak to women on a regular basis, most of them say they want to date me but don't really do something to show that their words are genuine. I work for that and when i see they want sex I just move on.  My whole viewpoint on women has shifted in a bad way because I feel people have made this important gift of union open for everybody. If you give your purity(gift) away to everybody, how can you say that you have somebody, when everyone gets to recieve you. I feel as though being selfless in this reguard is just dumb.  The bad shift manifested in that I see no big reasons to be in a friend relationship with women because down the train somebody will eventually catch feelings. The responcibility i have when i am with a female is big even though most of them deny me the authority. Most of their jokes and entertainment ain't even funny it becomes funny when i extract some of their points and use it, then they laugh their ass off. I feel like i waste my time interacting with them because they don't really have a whole lot interesting things to say or show me. This unfair exchange makes me ask the question "Well why not get a reward and fuck them?" But then i return to my principles and just dissmiss the question. But it keeps popping up. 

At the same time i've had intimate expiriences with others which were close to sex and it was very recharging. 

Perhaps it is because most people my age aren't that mature or maybe I'm delluded. 

Is chastity a valuable virtue to have? How do I know for sure I'm not fucking a useless parasite? Also I would greatly appreciate books on sexual dynamics and other resources you guys can link me up to. 

Thank you.

[Raze]

Study from John Gray author of men are from mars women are from Venus, he says he knows how to have sex without ejaculating and maintains semen energy

[Sanguine]

Don't doubt yourself, try to get out of your head and into your body/emotions regarding woman and intimacy. If you feel like it. Do it. Just not with anybody.. Especially your first time experience is a very special occasion and can be an awesome moment or crap. And if you have a connection with a person who actually cares for you. Go with the flow. If they see you as a body with a dick, fuck them (and figuratively :), so don't actually fuck them). 

After that, An occasional meaningless hookup is fine if you feel like It. And if it's enough, you'll notice. If you long for connection to be there before sex, just see where connection happens. 

Take it as you go.. 

I'm over 30 and I can tell you. Good sex with a girl you have a connection with can be fucking mind blowing and invigorating it doesnt drain your life energy. 

[Razard86]

Humans are the only beings on the planet that make a big deal about sex. On one hand sex can be profound and deep in many ways, it can also be shallow, but sex...is just sex. Its just an action like anything else. When you start adding all these meanings and interpretations that is just your opinion, nothing wrong with that but understand its neither here nor there.

There are a million ways to interpret sex, you can see it as physical activity, trying to impregnate someone, recreational activity, a holy sacred event, an act of union, a service through prostitution, you can also see it ultimately as self-love and masturbation. You can see it through whatever lens you want, hell you can call yourself asexual and call it dirty and sinful or "fornication."

Which lens is correct? Its however you want to see it. If you have no realized by now that life is however you want to view it, and its not this or that, its everything. Life is every perspective...EVERY perspective. An Owl has a different interpretation of night than you, so who is correct? A bat views life through echo-location, a blind world of sonar through sound. Reality and life isn't this or that, its whatever you personally think it is.

All arguments are just arguments of different personal realities people hold dear that is a combination of their culture and their environmental experiences. If you lived in a different era, different country, and were the opposite sex you would have a totally different opinion. So with that in mind? What is true? 

Stop thinking your world view is true and actually question this. Otherwise you are just one tiny perspective in a world of INFINITE perspectives.

[Leo Gura]

Dude, you have very fucked up ideas of women, relationships, and sex.

Learn to contect with women.

And no, there is no point in "saving yourself".

[Roy]

You are way too young to be overthinking this much. Open yourself up and start doing stuff, it doesn't matter if the experiences are "good" or "bad "or "right" or "wrong". You need to be experiencing, that will be the best way to learn what you actually want.

Right now you are confused and have no fucking clue what you want, because you have no reference experiences.

[Marvelllious]

@Razard86

10 hours ago, Razard86 said:

Life is every perspective...EVERY perspective

 

10 hours ago, Razard86 said:

What is true? 

Stop thinking your world view is true and actually question this. Otherwise you are just one tiny perspective in a world of INFINITE perspectives.

I do get this but it makes me feel out of place. Soon i need to be looking for a univercity and a future me that will be able to survive and thrive. For now i think i do need a little ego. What perspective is best to adapt as a stepping stone so i could get to this infinity lens switch you're talking about? How do I make the paradox of something is nothing, nothing is everything work and not fuck me so much in the ass?

[Marvelllious]

6 hours ago, Roy said:

You are way too young to be overthinking this much. Open yourself up and start doing stuff, it doesn't matter if the experiences are "good" or "bad "or "right" or "wrong". You need to be experiencing, that will be the best way to learn what you actually want.

Right now you are confused and have no fucking clue what you want, because you have no reference experiences.

Is there a list of must things i need to expirience in this age I'm at. What expiriences give you allot of clarity?

[Marvelllious]

@Sanguine thank you

[Marvelllious]

16 hours ago, Raze said:

Study from John Gray author of men are from mars women are from Venus, he says he knows how to have sex without ejaculating and maintains semen energy

thank you

[Noahsteelers34]

stop referring to women as "females", trust me if you ever say that in front of a women she will think its odd. Its like women are an alien species to you and you refer to them as "females". 

I'm 20 so I'm around your age, and I remember being your age and letting my mind be filled up with so many ideas about women from dating coaches, and online sources. Ive spent the last year detoxifying my brain from alot of the negative beliefs I picked up from the internet. I picked up the belief that women were whores, and alot of the toxic worldviews pushed on the internet. Now I'm dating a girl who was a virgin when I met her, and she's very loyal. 

stop expecting women to have something useful to show you, you will never find someone who lives up to that standard, you just have to appreciate people for where they are at. 

best of luck to you bro!

[something_else]

28 minutes ago, Noahsteelers34 said:

stop referring to women as "females", trust me if you ever say that in front of a women she will think its odd. Its like women are an alien species to you and you refer to them as "females". 

It always makes me laugh when I see guys call girls female in everyday contexts  it's a tad cringey

[LordFall]

On 7/9/2022 at 2:46 PM, Marvelllious said:

@Leo Gura

I'm 17, a virgin, been doing self dev since 13 years of age and before i struggled with attraction. Now I find it easy to cold approach and speak to women.

When we are reguarding sex though, I always turn my head away. I see my semen as a form of energy. Where you put that energy is very important because you will recieve that what you've sown. I'm afraid that by fucking the wrong girl i may start to expirience problems related to Lust. I know that whore behavior is greatly supported these days because it leads to confusion for easier manupilation. And as a male i do not want to participate in that cause. At the same time i do speak to women on a regular basis, most of them say they want to date me but don't really do something to show that their words are genuine. I work for that and when i see they want sex I just move on.  My whole viewpoint on women has shifted in a bad way because I feel people have made this important gift of union open for everybody. If you give your purity(gift) away to everybody, how can you say that you have somebody, when everyone gets to recieve you. I feel as though being selfless in this reguard is just dumb.  The bad shift manifested in that I see no big reasons to be in a friend relationship with women because down the train somebody will eventually catch feelings. The responcibility i have when i am with a female is big even though most of them deny me the authority. Most of their jokes and entertainment ain't even funny it becomes funny when i extract some of their points and use it, then they laugh their ass off. I feel like i waste my time interacting with them because they don't really have a whole lot interesting things to say or show me. This unfair exchange makes me ask the question "Well why not get a reward and fuck them?" But then i return to my principles and just dissmiss the question. But it keeps popping up. 

At the same time i've had intimate expiriences with others which were close to sex and it was very recharging. 

Perhaps it is because most people my age aren't that mature or maybe I'm delluded. 

Is chastity a valuable virtue to have? How do I know for sure I'm not fucking a useless parasite? Also I would greatly appreciate books on sexual dynamics and other resources you guys can link me up to. 

Thank you.

You sound like a weird mix of a spiritual and religious incel. You're way overthinking dude. You have infinite energy and "gift of union" to dispense go out and fuck some girls if you want to and stop being psychotic about it. What kind of brainwashing have you been through? 

@Noahsteelers34 The word female is definitely misused but it carries a lot of power and sacred energy, I would definitely use it. If you're a straight male the concept of a female is the most drastic and delightful you will get to experience, I would rejoice if I were you. 

Edited September 13, 2022 by LordFall