I'm finally awake, but what now ?

[Don Wei]

There are literally no words to explain this, it's like I finally understand everything at the same time. I thought I understood enlightenement or things in general but what I see now is so differen't. I thought I knew but its like the information I have now is so unlimited that i'm not able to do anything except being aware.

 

I thought I was a man, but I now don't know anymore, I really want to question everything right now, 

 

The love is just so much that I don't want it anymore, its like i'm giving myself all the love and anwsers and it feels really weird, even writing this on my phone feels like a waste of time. There is just so much I want to say but I'll stay quiet for now. I don't even understand why I never gave myself infinite love before. I just need to process this for now.

[Someone here]

Chop wood and carry water. 

[Seraphim]

Great! I wonder what your intuition is telling you now, about what to do next and how to live your life. The intuition must be stronger now. Try to connect with it and listen patiently. Btw how did you awake? Is there something we can learn from your experience?

Edited December 24, 2021 by Seraphim

[Fearless_Bum]

@Don Wei no offense and not coming from a place of attempting to be an authority on who's awake and who isn't, but if you're falling into the thought stories displayed in the original post, there's more letting go to do. 

Coming from another guy on the path, I'm not some awakened master or whatever. 

[Cathal]

thats just the beginning

[HypnoticMagician]

No matter what you write, there is no way to understand whether you have become enlightened from what you have written. We can only calculate the likelihood of it.

Edited December 24, 2021 by HypnoticMagician

[Don Wei]

@Fearless_Bum yes, of course. I did not let my entire ego go, i'm still processing the information I got. It felt like it was so infinite that anything I wanted to do was pointless, I also saw how much I manipulate and it was like the parts of my ego that I neglected were completely exposed.

I'm now back in my ego, but I also know that I can never see things the same again, I will contemplate what I found more right now and I will use my new experience to see what to do

I am not able to fully express what i'm aware of because i'm limited by words, my desire to do something right now is probably also my ego, earlier I didn't want to do anything with my awareness because I already had everything in my earlier state of consciousness, but don't take what I write too seriously, i'm new to psychedelics.

[Fearless_Bum]

@Don Wei here's some tips from another dude: 

-talking about an ego and making stories about it is like a burglar coming up to you telling you about a burglar out on the streets stealing stuff.

-let all the ego stuff go, I'm stubborn too so I get it, but what we refer to as enlightenment is No-Mind. In no mind there is no story any more, but the mind will always say this is impossible and come up with a million excuses. It's like you hear about silence but all you ever do is talk about silence when true silence is .......

Meditation is key, all the awakening stuff is just fun stories, nothing against that and go ahead share, but they are only stories.

?‍♂️ I don't even meditate formally anymore lol. I'll get back on that ox though and then .........

[Don Wei]

@Fearless_Bum btw, I made this post while I was still tripping, I haven't processed it yet. So when I say awake i'm talking about my first awakening  experience with psychedelics. I have had some experiences that felt kinda similar before but not near as powerful as this, it's like Leo said in one of the videos, there are many differen't ways you can awaken and different types of infinity. Like differen't flavours, but I don't know, I guess I'll find out.

[Don Wei]

@Fearless_Bum ah yes thats true, I felt a state of no mind like that, but the problem I experienced is that immediately after I felt a need to explain and rationalize wtf just happened, I felt a need to DO something with the information and as soon as that happened my ego started creeping back up. This all feels pretty strange and new, I kinda feel like a kid, like there was dirt in my eyes before and now my eyes are a bit cleaner.

[Fearless_Bum]

@Don Wei I get it, self-declaring as being awake is 1000% common on psychedelics lol, after so many trips I can only laugh at myself now. 

This may be difficult as so many (me included) fall into this, but try not self declaring as anything. 

When you're enlightened you will know without even a shadow of a doubt. No one will have to confirm it for you. 

But have fun with your awakening stuff, I mean really actually enjoy the process ?.

Hahaha yes, after no mind the mind kicks in and calls it a state, then holds the state almost like a collectible trading card. I'd just be aware of that more and more.

Edited December 24, 2021 by Fearless_Bum

[Jakuchu]

[Don Wei]

@Nos7algiK I used psylocybin utopia, I was first planning on using atlantis instead but a more experienced person told me not to use that one as a novice, i'm glad I didn't, that would have been way too much.

[Fearless_Bum]

3 minutes ago, Jakuchu said:

He gets it...

[Don Wei]

@Fearless_Bum is it strange that I also feel some fear ? Maybe it's my ego but too be honest, normally when I do self development I do it to improve something or to raise my conscious but when I was in the god state I felt like I wasn't able to do anything with the information beside just being. It was too incredible for words but it wasn't biased so it also included all my fears and shadow parts 

I found out I have always been doing things for ego, but what else is there to do ? I have no idea what the point of anything is really, why do I even want anything ? More and more questions about everything keep coming up 

[Terell Kirby]

Hmm, the first question that comes  to mind after awakening isn’t usually  “now what?”

It is more like “why the hell was I asleep for so long??” 

The pure bliss and feeling of total understanding drives such a question.

Edited December 24, 2021 by Terell Kirby

[Fearless_Bum]

1 minute ago, Don Wei said:

@Fearless_Bum I found out I have always been doing things for ego, but what else is there to do ?

@Don Wei a full circle realization that's possible Is that Don Wei has never done a single thing, desire is actually infinite intelligence / nature geniusly creating reality. You can't actually do anything for anything lol. 

The fear and the psychological shadow, ego stories, excuses, justifications, "awakenings", are very much connected, do you see the one thing holding all these together?

[Don Wei]

@Seraphim yes there is, but sadly I don't fully know how to explain it and I also feel like you and everybody else already has the information you want, it was like first during the trip my body did exactly what it wanted, I was like an animal. I had no control, and after time passed I started to become more aware and get more insights, I tried to watch a video from Leo but it felt pointless, I tried to get many anwsers from outside but it was like my entire being tried to stop me from going outside and instead force me inside my own body and awareness, I also video called a friend who also does self development and has more experience with psychedelics.

It was almost like there was no difference between me and him, we were the same and I felt bliss, like I was aware of him for the first time

[LSD-Rumi]

@Don Wei  
I once awakened on acid and the first thing that came through my mind was, jeez this is gonna be boring, not a negative way but I felt like I must also have a thing to channel my energy into and here where I truly understood the value of having a real-life purpose.

[BipolarGrowth]

Go have fun.