Sex Diary

[Hulia]

8 hours ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

Everytime you judge someone else so fiercely as you're doing here with ivankiss, it's because there is something in ourselves we are disconnected from.

I am disconnected????

Look at this "someone else":

28 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

I kinda fell in love with another girl's eyes today. We flirted hard. The tension was ridiculous. 

For now; I will stop reporting about J. At least until anything significant happens. But I really hope I will have another report soon about this new girl. She's breathtaking.

And I honestly resolved not to judge him. But how? He fell in love with another girl´s eyes!

[ivankiss]

Haha I really don't get you @Hulia

You seem so confused. It's kinda cute.

What exactly is bothering you here?

[Zeroguy]

@Hulia @ivankiss  Until you 2 resolve issues let me just...

 

[Zeroguy]

Here is the issue with women on this forum.They want to live in their bubble and turning blind eye to life and how it actually is.They will rather life to be how they want it.Whole world must comform to their view which is not the case.Will not start with amount of hypocrisy exibited.

I already cheated my gf with 2 different women so far and who knows how many are there yet there to come.I am not afraid saying it and I will be bad guy (completely honest) while some good spiritual saint who probably does the same but never jeperdizes his self image is all good.

Still women will be attracted to this guy.

[Zeroguy]

It hurts them for so many reasons.Will not go into explanations what's the difference btw average women and these on forum.Nor do I care that much.

[ivankiss]

@Zeroguy Uf, koje smeće od pesme tebra 

Ovo je 'zika iz duše:

Also; please let's not turn this thread (journal) into another men vs women kind of nonsense.

This is simply not the place for it.

[Zeroguy]

@ivankiss Yeah I agree.

Znam da je smece zato i postavljam . 

 

[ivankiss]

@Zeroguy Udji slobodno 

Btw; cheating is wrong and you're kinda an asshole for doing that. It's cowardly.

Just my opinion.

Once again; I am not in a relationship with J - for anyone misunderstanding any of this. We are fuck buddies. There is no form of cheating going on here. 

I am free to fall for a million more beautiful girls if I want to. Thankfully; there is no shortage of them.

Edited July 3, 2021 by ivankiss

[Etherial Cat]

@Zeroguy

Various degrees of cheating is rather common in relationships, I would say.

And anyway, it's hard to tell where it starts. Maybe with a look? By flirting mildly with a stranger? With a friendship drifting towards more romantic feelings? A kiss? Having sex?

But the point is not there when it comes to cheating. The point is that when you have a fully fulfilling relationship with someone of the opposite sex, it's quite likely that you can't have what you have with this person with a lot of other person. And if you do, it means most likely that, your relationship with your partner is not that great. Cheating occurs when a part of oneself is not perceived, or can't express itself... or when an important need isn't met by a partner.

Throughout my life, whenever I've been into a guy, it has always been because I couldn't get to reach the same level of intimacy with others and that guy was a much closer match than anyone, and by far. So it would not make sense to want to look somewhere else anyway.

Usually, people cheat for rather silly reasons (hot guy/girl, guy/girl with status, crush based on delusion). And these are all not worth jeopardizing a relationship with a partner who is a unicorn to you. 

--

14 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@Zeroguy

Once again; I am not in a relationship with J - for anyone misunderstanding any of this. We are fuck buddies. There is no form of cheating going on here. 

I am free to fall for a million more beautiful girls if I want to. Thankfully; there is no shortage of them.

Kudos for you for stating so clearly your intentions to her. It's great that both of you are coming from the same place.

Though... I don't buy it will be as easy in the future.  If so, I'll be impressed. I don't believe in fuck buddies.

Edited July 3, 2021 by Etherial Cat

[Zeroguy]

Love you guys. @ivankiss I always cheated all women I've been in relationship so I dunno. Just was like that. 

Doesn't matter who cares. 

Tired of these topics I really am. Maybe some of the trolling attitude because of that. 

@Etherial Cat Unicorn. Well maybe I dunno. This time I am far more rational. 

@ivankiss You do realize because of this text you will fire up female imagination and that you will become hot comodity here haha. 

Wish you well. 

[ivankiss]

@Etherial Cat Cool. Thanks.

See, when I'm truly committed in a relationship, a sacred partnership, I simply see no other woman. I do not notice them. They might as well be having a dick hanging between their legs. It's like the switch is off, and being attracted to other women simply does not arise.

I can appreciate a good looking girl. I don't go blind or mentally handicapped lol. There's just no thirst. No burning sexual desire.

It's more of a energy thing. The seeking energy is no longer activated once I'm committed in a relationship.

So yeah. No flirting. No sexting. No touching inappropriately. No sex.

Any of that I'd consider it being cheating. Lying. Manipulation. A violation of a sacred agreement. A shattering of Trust. Betrayal. Death - even. 

 

***Regarding J;

Yeah; I'm super happy about how clear and straightforward everything is. There is no distortion. It's all honest.

And yeah, I kinda suspect it will be somewhat painful once we stop. We are both deep feelers. 

But I think it will be also beautiful and totally worth it. Sometimes you just gotta have some balls to truly live.

Edited July 3, 2021 by ivankiss

[Peter Miklis]

@Zeroguy I mean, cheating is pretty asshole thing to do, you could have just stayed fuck buddies like @ivankiss with his girl and not call it relationship, no? 

[Zeroguy]

@Peter Miklis I am quite posessive will never allow woman I am with to even consider some other guy let alone be free as bird. I am a relationship guy or become that as I matured. Very strict very father like yet I kniw double standards. Forget that zero is goofy in his private life. 

[Etherial Cat]

7 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@Etherial Cat Cool. Thanks.

See, when I'm truly committed in a relationship, a sacred partnership, I simply see no other woman. I do not notice them. They might as well be having a dick hanging between their legs. It's like the switch is off, and being attracted to other women simply does not arise.

I can appreciate a good looking girl. I don't go blind or mentally handicapped lol. There's just no thirst. No burning sexual desire.

It's more of a energy thing. The seeking energy is no longer activated once I'm committed in a relationship.

Yep! That's also what's been my experience in a nutshell.

9 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

So yeah. No flirting. No sexting. No touching inappropriately. No sex.

Any of that I'd consider it being cheating. Lying. Manipulation. A violation of a sacred agreement. A shattering of Trust. Betrayal. Death - even. 

 

Death?! How so?

[Zeroguy]

@ivankiss Who cares. 

More of these texts please. Lets clean this journal from philosophizing. 

[ivankiss]

1 minute ago, Etherial Cat said:

Death?! How so?

The one who trusted fully and believed blindly... inevitably dies. Slayed by the sharp-edged weapon called 'a lie'.

It's called 'heart-break' - I believe. And if you let it consume you fully - the pieces of your broken heart simply forget how to put themselves back together. 

It's one of the most painful experiences I can recall having. But once you've healed; your heart never shuts down again. Love keeps pouring out of it forever, in all directions. There's nothing blocking the current now.

[soos_mite_ah]

48 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

@Zeroguy

Various degrees of cheating is rather common in relationships, I would say.

And anyway, it's hard to tell where it starts. Maybe with a look? By flirting mildly with a stranger? With a friendship drifting towards more romantic feelings? A kiss? Having sex?

I think that what is considered cheating has more to do with consent rather than the action itself. If you're in a fwb relationship, both parties are consenting that there isn't any relationship and that either party can have sex with other people if they wish to do so, so in that case it isn't cheating. If someone is an open relationship or in a polyamorous relationship, you wouldn't say that everyone is cheating on each other. I think it's important to have a conversation with your partner on what is fine and what actually hurts you in order to draw the line and keep communication clear. Like someone might think flirting with someone as not a big deal but their partner might have different boundaries. 

30 minutes ago, Zeroguy said:

I am quite posessive will never allow woman I am with to even consider some other guy let alone be free as bird.

Wait so you cheat on other women but you expect women to be with you exclusively? Isn't that hypocritical? 

[Zeroguy]

@soos_mite_ah Did I said double standards? I am quite aware but I don't lie or I am trying to find excusses. Women with whom I cheat my gf I have zero attachment or desire for them and if I cheat with some woman I might have then I try to keep her too or substitute current gf. 

That's all. 

[Etherial Cat]

8 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

The one who trusted fully and believed blindly... inevitably dies. Slayed by the sharp-edged weapon called 'a lie'.

It's called 'heart-break' - I believe. And if you let it consume you fully - the pieces of your broken heart simply forget how to put themselves back together. 

It's one of the most painful experiences I can recall having. But once you've healed; your heart never shuts down again. Love keeps pouring out of it forever, in all directions. There's nothing blocking the current now.

Ah, yes.

I didn't interpret/read your sentence this way. I thought you meant that you'd consider death cheating, which got me really confused. 

Of course there is feeling of death whenever a sacred partnership ends. I'd say, we experience numerous small deaths throughout life and the more the heart is involved in them, the worse is the grief.

I've had some of the moment you've described. And its not for nothing that the heart is named the Anahata (the undefeated), because each times it breaks, it gives it an opportunity to rise and expend.  I think that's what you've been referring to especially, here? 

40 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

***Regarding J;

Yeah; I'm super happy about how clear and straightforward everything is. There is no distortion. It's all honest.

And yeah, I kinda suspect it will be somewhat painful once we stop. We are both deep feelers. 

But I think it will be also beautiful and totally worth it. Sometimes you just gotta have some balls to truly live.

Yes. I love how it's kept clean and honest. I must say that I wish that this is what I would read in the dating section of this website.

It doesn't look like you're in a dangerous emotional place as you seem to be already looking forward to get with other girls. That's not really a space or mindset that will show deep hurt- at least as of now.

But yes, stopping will most likely be painful. Seems like you guys are having a lot of highs as of now... And well, life ain't only that. I'd be impressed if both of you manage to keep it classy until the end. 

 

 

[Etherial Cat]

49 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I think that what is considered cheating has more to do with consent rather than the action itself. If you're in a fwb relationship, both parties are consenting that there isn't any relationship and that either party can have sex with other people if they wish to do so, so in that case it isn't cheating. If someone is an open relationship or in a polyamorous relationship, you wouldn't say that everyone is cheating on each other. I think it's important to have a conversation with your partner on what is fine and what actually hurts you in order to draw the line and keep communication clear. Like someone might think flirting with someone as not a big deal but their partner might have different boundaries. 

Yes. I wasn't referring to Ivankiss's situation here but discussed cheating in the context of a committed relationship as per Zeroguy's post before.

But yes, defining what qualifies as cheating is one hell of a difficult line. Technically, you could already cheat on your partner by having an emotional affair which would never include anytime being out of boundaries action-wise. 

Regarding consent... I think consent is a very important notion in cheating but it is not enough. First, a partner doesn't give usually a long laundry list of what he think is out of boundaries. So you've got to figure it out by yourself, and the odds are quite high that you might make some wrong assumptions.

And cheating can appear in some rather grey areas, which are hard to ban in the first place. And that's because attraction between individuals often grow over time and what used to be a rather benign interaction can turn ambiguous. 

Also, it is normal to be mildly attracted to other individuals and enjoy their company. Once in a relationship, you might still meet people and some might objectively be attractive in some ways. So is it cheating to hang around them ? It's all difficult.

Edited July 4, 2021 by Etherial Cat