How do I stop getting picked on by friends at school

[machinegun]

I am a senior in high school right now. And listen, I know these people aren't my friends. But, I'm going to have to face them when I go back to school for the last two weeks, and I don't want to sit by myself. 

So, the situation is I've done some serious work on myself over the past year to improve my self-esteem. My friends are really into roasting, but I'm pretty bad at it. So, what usually ends up happening is they all gang up on me and it's literal hell. My social life in high school consisted of getting made fun of at lunch and during free periods. It has sucked harder than anything in my life, and I don't know how I will face them for the last two weeks.

I can fight back for two weeks, but the real problem is I don't want to repeat this in college. I have always been the bottom bitch, and I don't know a way out.

Help.

[SamC]

I belive the best would be to be open to them about how you feel when they do this roasting game's.  If they are not understanding, you should ditch them and move on. 

Thinking about it...  who wouldn't feel shit if you have a game where you're trying to put people down? That's so immature and stupied. Honestly, ditch them anyways - find better friends. These are not people you want to be around anyways 

It is 2 weeks left. If they start, tell them that you don't want to partake In this game and tell them why. If they start blaming you, leave the fucking table.

In other words, practice setting boundaries. That's one of the keys for now, and for your college life. 

Edited April 20, 2021 by SamC

[Roy]

I know what's it's like, let me tell you. You are going to get a weight lifted off your shoulders when you're outa there.

Two more weeks ain't long to go. You were there for 4 years right? You're in the home stretch, it's gonna fly by. Look forward to the time off you're gonna have and the fun exciting things you want to do. Just grind it out.

If you want to make some fun of it and confuse them for the last bit, cold shoulder them. Make them question themselves and get enraged that their regular behavior isn't working. What do you have to lose? Most of them you'll probably never see again so it's not like you gotta worry about anything 

Good news for you college is a different environment completely! You'll find it's a lot more easy going and laid back. You'll have an opportunity to completely reinvent yourself and try new things out. Make an effort to make different kinds of friends than the ones you became comfortable with in high school. You'll be a lot less likely to fall into old social habits that way. You'll have brand new social circles where you'll be able to impose yourself a bit more and not be the "bottom bitch". College has a lot less cliques and groups, so don't stress about that.

It's gonna get better! High school sucks, just 2 short weeks and you're done 

 

 

[machinegun]

@SamC I don't want to be their friend, but the shame of being a loner keeps me stuck there. I don't mind being a loner, because in actuality I am. But, I just don't want other people to see me as a loner. I can set boundaries and tell people to fuck off easily now. But, my shame hasn't gotten better to the point where I can sit alone and not let is phase me.

@Roy Thanks for your kind words. It's hard to envision such a bright future. I do in fact plan on re-inventing myself and blocking those friends after I graduate. Some of which are coming to my college, but I will make it a point to let them know we are not on friendly terms.

[Preety_India]

@machinegun try to make it harder for them to make fun of you.. But don't let yourself be impacted by them because who you are is more important than them.. So always take them out of your head after every encounter. 

Keep yourself cheerful all the time. 

 

[Parththakkar12]

@machinegun This is a high-school thing. People mature more as they grow older, this is a temporary thing. At least, people act more mature. At least, in person (the internet is a bit of a shitshow but you get the point).

[Rigel]

"My friends are really into roasting, but I'm pretty bad at it. So, what usually ends up happening is they all gang up on me and it's literal hell"

 

Find better friends? 

[Bando]

Lmfao, bro your in high school, life 100% gets better once you get out if you self-improve, high school kids dont have a "filter" because they haven't had enough life experiences yet to teach them otherwise. When people get older you out grow that "roasting" stuff and move on. 

Start lifting and clean up your diet, pick up a martial art like boxing, jiu-jitsu, you need to raise your standards on who your friends are and that can only happen if you respect yourself. If you dont improve college will be worse 

[hoodrow trillson]

I was kind of a bully in high school myself because I had zero filter, I was a troll and I hung out with expert roasters.  I wasn't a full on bully though, I befriended kids that couldn't defend themselves too lol

OP, it sucks for you but keep in mind high school ultimately shapes who you are going forward in a more permanent way than say--you changing yourself/your views when you're 25.  Sure, you can get new friends and completely change your life to avoid assholes but assholes will spring up at you ANYWHERE; family, dinners, vacations, neighbors, etc.  You'll get obliterated again and again.

Stand up for yourself now and break that cycle at the root, or you'll be the same loner person getting roasted on in college, then till your late 20s at work, maybe in your 30s, etc.  In a funny way, what your friends are doing is basically trying to save you from being so passive/pushover but in a very blunt manner.  It's a very hamfisted way to get a strong confidence core about yourself if you can develop thick skin and have a poison tongue by being quick with the "clap backs".

I say fight for 2 weeks just to change things up and see what happens   Surprise them and get vulgar.  Good luck.

[somegirl]

So high school is a tough period that shapes you and builds you up. It's the case for most people at that stage in life.

I'm nit gonna tell you that you won't encounter assholes when you get out of high school because you will, THERE ARE EVERYWHERE (though it does get better after high school nevertheless). 

And whenever you encounter one and he/she lures at you, it's a sign that you haven't learnt (yet) to deal with them or learnt a lesson life is trying to teach you so life tosses you assholes until you figure out how to deal with them. 

The best approach I figured out how to handle such situation is to be tough and develope strong self confidence. I mean really, a strong one. So much that you have that "don't fuck with me" aura around you. It's about self confidence really. They lure at you because they smelled you are a good prey (either you are too nice, lack confidence, act weak etc).

You can also tell them "Hey, you bore me, find someone else to play with", but say it assertively. I know my friend in collage said it to a person that tried to play with her and after that that person backed off. Or if someone tries to put you down you say "What was that?", in a condescending way. They will back off when they see you have that in you.

They have to "feel" you really are comfortable with yourself and who you are.

So the answer is develope confidence. Love yourself. I KNOW it's hard to develope self confidence at that stage in life. But I promise you this kind of situations you are facing right now will force you to. You will use this situation to your advantage and learn most important lesson in your life.

After that assholes will just avoid you (cause yiu don't act like a prey anymore).

Edited April 21, 2021 by somegirl