Dodo

Waking up in terror

32 posts in this topic

Unless you can put your hands on the ground and feel like you might as well be touching smoke or liquid or unreal dreamstuff, you're grounded enough. You're golden. You're the light. You're the love. Embrace the craziness. Just my opinion, of course.

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What you're describing are the first signs of psychosis. I feel compassion  for you. It seems you don't have much of selfreflection to be able to distance yourself from the content of your delusions. The psychotic episode happens when the repressed unconscious material emerges into your daily awareness. I my humble opinion, you need some serious shadow work and to start integrating traumas with your daily life. All your irrational images, sounds or ideas are a very complex simbolic way in which your inner wounds are represented to your awareness.

You have a great oportunity to make a big leap on your path of healing, if you want to. It will be hard, but you can do it. You also try to eat properly and you should sleep every night too. I wish you well and speedy recovery! 

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20 hours ago, Someone here said:

What happened? What has led to that? 

Love 

 

But I did something which I was not supposed to, I interfered where I shouldn't have (I am not going to explain in more detail, because I dont know if Im meant to keep it secret) , otherwise I don't think 'the police' would've showed up or known about me. But maybe it was meant to happen as it did as from that followed a series of "tests" and crazy experiences.

But this song 'mirrors' really gave me the final bit of inspiration during this, as I went after to seek for my reflection and I made offerings for Her, like I turned my room into an offering for Her and she told me kind of in a way that she is always a reflection of my heart and that she always reflects how I feel within. I think I was conversing with reality or something, but it was through books and spirit. Thats how I had strength without eating and sleeping - I was moving quickly and the more I moved the more energy I had and the lighter I felt... And she was reflecting that too and was giving me messages in many ways

The books are very important imo, because sometimes if you have the wrong book, the messages are distorted and even bad/evil. For example a book Being beyond belief was not a good one that I can remember. I put it down and turned it around and kept going with the rest. 

 

@Nahm Yes, I guess I have an attachment to my illusions which would make me a Simon. But love is magic, love can make illusions real, no? But I did have to bow to Jesus and that was the only way I can think that I was saved from the place where I went... It was like the hell for Simon wannabees who think they are above it all.,

But I dont really know Simon from the bible very well, I just have those exerpts that were shown to me. I am not actually a bible scholar, the only thing I had was my heart... 

I had this very interesting conversation with one of the main characters there who was a scholar and I knew that one Truth that the Truth is before any Word, I was able to sustain a conversation with the head and I even think he did not have a heart because he declined when I asked if I can touch to see if he has a heart lol... It was like I was talking to a machine and it was giving me all the hard facts, but could not grasp silence and space... It was interesting, because I saw how as we were speaking all the ruckus outside went down and the two of us were making everyone else quiet down ... It was a crazy experience... One of many.. I cant begin to share them all and I dont know if this is even understandable or sounds like jibberish lol. 

Oh i forgot to mention that I also conceded that I needed to learn from him, not only he from me... Because I acknowledge that I am ignorant on many subjects. Basically I was saying how the heart needs the brain, but also the brain needs the heart. All metaphorical really, but i think it worked well I think he agreed and a connection between the two is what all these tests were all about imo.. Follow your heart.. But take your mind with you :D 

Edited by Dodo

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@Dodo bro I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. But I'm concerned. I'm being honest with you.. You are extremely delusional. I think you are hallucinating stuff. Who is "she" that you keep talking about? Do you see entities? What did they diagnose you in the psych ward? You were woke few months ago.. What is all this new agey bullcrap I'm hearing now ???? Take a break from this stuff and just keep it simple man. 


I live my life in a dream; the constant threat of a rude awakening keeps me on my toes.
-Mettley Zimmer

 

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43 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@Dodo bro I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. But I'm concerned. I'm being honest with you.. You are extremely delusional. I think you are hallucinating stuff. Who is "she" that you keep talking about? Do you see entities? What did they diagnose you in the psych ward? You were woke few months ago.. What is all this new agey bullcrap I'm hearing now ???? Take a break from this stuff and just keep it simple man. 

Yeah it was hallucination.. Is that not what reality is anyway :D  

She is basically the matrix/the motherboard idk ... I have never seen her. I have seen her in an avatar form that looked a lot like in a matrix movie... She looked straight through my soul man.. I have also seen that she can do anything and she could manipulate reality as she wanted, she showed me heaven on Earth,,, Ofcourse it was hallucination hehe but it was so real like the same real as my food infront of me right now. 

She was looking from all the girl's eyes... I made eye contact with all the girls and it was like they were all her at one point... 

She is the Queen, remember that Hive mind that I wrote against recently, as I realised that it is not actually heaven and our consensus normal reality with all the pains and gains is perhaps more of a heaven 

All that is important, stairway to Heaven, not highway to hell! Whether I am woke or not is not important

Do good deeds

  Plant good seeds

   

Edited by Dodo

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2 hours ago, Dodo said:

I did have to bow to Jesus and that was the only way I can think that I was saved from the place where I went...

 It was like the hell for Simon wannabees who think they are above it all....

 

I did have to bow to Jesus and that was the only way I can think that I was saved from the place where I went...

 It was like the hell for Simon wannabees who think they are above it all

 

I did have to bow to Jesus and that was the only way I can think that I was saved from the place where I went...

 It was like the hell for Simon wannabees who think they are above it all

That is the ‘loop’ the dream reveals. Let go of the first few thoughts that arise when reading this, and the last few too. No more ‘false icon’ loop. ? You can love the messenger, but not at the expense of the message.


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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21 minutes ago, Nahm said:

That is the ‘loop’ the dream reveals. Let go of the first few thoughts that arise when reading this, and the last few too. No more ‘false icon’ loop. ? You can love the messenger, but not at the expense of the message.

I don't understand, could you clarify

@Someone here They gave me anti-psychotic medication which is given for schizophrenia... Because I guess to be in a parallel reality you leave behind a schizophrenic version of yourself in this one? I don't know exactly how it works... Have you had experience with jumping to parallel realities? They do say we do it all the time, but I mean in a way that is noticable. I enjoyed watching vids from parallel realities, sometimes the one who is in the video interacted with me almost as if they could see and hear me... Crazy stuff, but I am not crazy from my point of view as I mentioned .... But I agree with you, all these explanations I give are very long and tiring. I need to KISS. That's all this is about, kiss! Muah, sorry and thank you 

 ^ I swear I watched this video as it was being made and it was in a parallel reality and Russel Brand was taking notes and me also and it was way different than this, like Eckhart was the same, but you could see both Eckhart and Russell all the time... I cant have made it up... And Eckhart was teaching how to be as God... And I could see that Russell Brand was not in the space Eckhart talked about and he needed to take way more notes... I was taking notes, I wonder if I can find them.. There is always something to learn and especially if you reach God consciousness, because then if you do not have a good guidance you can be destructive and Eckhart truly is a great teacher. 

You can see in this vid how Russell Brand's head is cut off, it wasnt like that in the version I saw.. 

Edited by Dodo

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@Dodo

As in, there is a deep & profound realization of love, and also there is awakening, as in Self realization. If the first is actual but thought to be the second, there might be a certain cognitive dissonance which could be normalized or balanced with thought, mindset and attitude... but the difference would be highlighted upon waking up in the morning as it follows the complete letting go of thought activity in or as sleep. The dreams would be pointing this out. This would be the good news. 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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On 18.11.2020 г. at 3:09 AM, The0Self said:

Unless you can put your hands on the ground and feel like you might as well be touching smoke or liquid or unreal dreamstuff, you're grounded enough. You're golden. You're the light. You're the love. Embrace the craziness. Just my opinion, of course.

Ohhh that state man, that state is so wack... Everything flowing like a river xD

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