ivankiss

I have no friends.

65 posts in this topic

I feel for you bro, got similar situation although we live in UK with my girlfriend being the only friend I have here. Are you really happy where you are or does something deep inside tell you that its time to go home? I think we all have a tiny voice inside us that really knows what we want. Call it an intuition perhaps. 

Try to open yourself up completely to it in your meditation sessions and maybe something will be revealed to you :)

Edited by Michael569

“If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.” ― Epictetus

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Mikael89 said:

Interesting that you moved there because of what you said. Crazy. Usually people want to move to better places, not worse. Well, try to not get blown up there.

You sound like my mother lol. Glad I'm not most of the people. I guess that is exactly the mentality I aimed to escape. It's all about comfort zone for (most) Europeans.

Nearly had a foursome with three Swedish chicks once tho. Chickened out lol. They're wild; dunno how you manage not to get laid.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Michael569 EU is not my home. I don't have a physical home that is tied to a particular location. I do sense a pull back there, mainly cuz I know some sick musicians and producers there. Would love to lock myself in a studio with them. Finding good quality musicians that click can be equally as challenging. Even more. 

But all in all; I'd rather move forward, not back. Asia resonates for now. Maybe Australia. Even USA. Will see. I might, however, continue the journey by myself. Gf seems to be pulled in a different direction.

What about you? Are you happy where you are?

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@ivankiss fair enough, perhaps you need to do a wider circle to be eventually pulled back or will make a foreign country your permanent home one day. 

2 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

What about you? Are you happy where you are?

I am because I have found my purpose in here and took initial steps towards being able to embody it fully later on. This makes me feel like I am not just drifting in the wind. I would not have been able to do in my country.Once my re-education is finished, I may go back and see if I can implement what I have learned.  However I feel a pull-back as I don't think I'll ever feel like I trully belong here. 


“If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.” ― Epictetus

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Practise the skill of talking to strangers.

Even for the married man or woman, this is a skillset most needed in the smartphone era.

Look how easy it is for me to write on a forum online? Now when was the last time you said hello to someone in the real world?

Mitigate this time gap, and your self esteem will also rise.

Boundary your online time and limit it.

But never skip even one day without talking to a new stranger. It is healthy for the mind and social system.

The way to get good at talking to strangers is through repetition and practise over months and years.

You will look back in 5 years from now and ponder why it was so tough ever making friends after you master this skill.

Mastery of skill requires daily practice. My advise is to talk to strangers.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Beyond talking to strangers, I feel your grief over your friend.

Its not gay.

Construct a ceremony or ritual of significance and grief your hurt. Youre letting go your projection of him.

You can and will find another guy friend or a Master who can fulfill all of those authentic characteristics.

You said you are a warrior?

A warrior never gives up as well as he is in harmony with Nature. Go find your new friend. Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Michael569 I guess the idea is to make the world my home. Exploration and diverse experience seems to be relevant now. Settling down will wait forever. Moving around also compliments my mission/purpose. Wasn't feeling this aligned before.

Happy for ya. Wish you all the best.

@JohnnyBravo  Appreciate it man, but you missed that one. Small talk is natural to me. Not shy or introverted at all. Talking to strangers on a daily basis. Effortlessly.

I am referring to deep, soul connections. Not random small talk.

Had a grieving ceremony, too. Cried like a lil bitch. Felt great.

Looking forward now. Fresh and open for possibilities.

Thanks tho!

Edited by ivankiss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If this is the case, well done.

For a connection as such, timing is the spice.

At the same time, lower your standards for what constitutes a "quality friend."

Have you attended any mens support groups in the past 6 months?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@JohnnyBravo I feel like my standards have been too low until now haha. I was lying to myself for so long just so I could match with someone. 

If I look inwards now; there are no standards anymore. I just finally know who I am and do not fear to be it. By myself or around others. 

Men's support group? Don't have an idea what that is xD Sounds like not my thing tho.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why does it sound like not your thing?

You said you desired a genuine bond with a fellow man based on authenticity.

A support group is one of many environments you can meet men as such.

If you are socially outgoing you will enjoy the new experience anyway.

Do what works. Glad I could help.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the end of the day, we are all family :)

 


B R E A T H E

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

come on APEX and let's kill some fuckerz

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, Mikael89 said:

That is incorrect. Swedish girls are the most difficult and least crazy ones on the planet.

Congratulations. Good for you.

maybe you should meet them out of the country. :) and tell them you are from somewhere else.

maybe they are only the least crazy   of the planet at this particular part of it.

i once met a girl from sweden who lived alone in a favela in brazil - she  couldn’t have done that in sweden.

Edited by now is forever

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@ivankiss here's another way of looking at it: have no friends. be a friend to people.

  • get closer to them
  • listen to them
  • answer their questions calmly and patiently
  • give them advice if requested
  • demand nothing

unborn Truth

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@ajasatya Like this a lot. Thanks. 

Have that role often. But also seem to be attached to the lone wolf idea somewhat. 

Ya'all have proven my statement false. I have so many friends here. Kind and loving ones. We'll get physical at some point, for sure ;) All connections are soul connections, I kno'. Just had to get this out. Grieve some. 

Thank you all so much. You are wonderful. 

@Mikael89 I said I chickened out. Nothing to congratulate for haha. I do seem to form connections with women more effortlessly, naturally. Would be your wing at some point, gladly ;) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Mikael89 Never had a wing myself. Always found it ridiculous.

But I guess it'd be fun. Could create a more relaxed, laid back atmosphere and approach.

Instead of tense and tight. Dating is not a math exam.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Aeris said:

come on APEX and let's kill some fuckerz

Is that a geek thing? Would love to geek. Lifetimes since I last did.

However; not the right set and setting. Still computerless. Terrible internet connection.

Not very digital at all; besides this form.

Will let ya know tho ;) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm your friend.

Just give me some bananas as payment.


God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Shin Have only one B|

Doubt you'd llike the taste tho xD

(was that too much? kinda drunk)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@Shin Have only one B|

Doubt you'd llike the taste tho xD

(was that too much? kinda drunk)

It's only too much If I can't breathe for 20 seconds ;)


God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now