First ever deep LSD trip 130 μg

[Anton Rogachevski]

Mind you I did take LSD before and I think in higher doses but it was my recrational past, and it was nothing, not even close to what it's like right now.

It all started this morning, saturday. I've rested well for two days and perpared since yesterday. Yesterday took a microdose of about 20 ug, and there was no notable difference from the regular midnfulness I practice for years. 

This morning I took about 130 ug. I've always heard about psychedelic experiences and wanted to get an idea of what it's like. It's nothing like described. It's amazing to see how different actual reality is from ideas about it. It's not so obvious from a perspective of never having experienced it before.

The first two hours were a gradual climb and enhancement of the perceptual field and on about the two hour mark it started! First ever enlightenment experience! I just sat there perparing for the trip, streching, having a quality breakfast and coffee to get the body started. And I was very mindful of the experience, at the first two hours it seemed regular and then I just looked in the mirror and had a deep inquiry about the source of all this experience. I asked "is this body the source of experince?" and from then on the light of god strated pouring at me like a watefall.

3 hour mark:

All the questions I've had were just washed away and disappeared. It was so obvious and so simple. The next instant I saw that I'm an angel of god looking in the mirror and asking who god is. And the duality between me and god finally united into a unified and infinite field of wonder. Take the regular everyday experiemce and multiply its intensity and magnification by 10,000 and you might get an idea of what it's like. Of course reality and self still in tact in such dosage, but for a first deep trip I found it useful enough for insights and seeing self deception around me. It becomes so obvious! It's like: "How did I not see it?!"

I decided it's time for a deeper contamplation and further trying to interpret what is before me. Since I started writing I notice that as I write and understand deeper, the quality of the experience is deepening to infinity probably. As I write and for an idea it becomes my experience instantly.

The notion of angels started to be very accurate in describing just the "usual" things we normally see. The first scribbles were just like mythical angels and god metaphores I tried to communicate as a message of god. Oh well at least I did my best.

At this point (5 hour mark) I think i will dediacte an hour of just walking my dog and keep integrating what is happening more spontaneously. Experince is returning to usual gradually. Still many insights into my life, self deception, relatioships, and overall expension of the big picture understanding of life.

[How to be wise]

@Anton Rogachevski Just keep in mind that LSD will not give you any lasting spiritual growth. So just what are you aiming for with psychedelics. A good time? An interesting experience? Make sure you’re not escaping the hard work of self inquiry and turning inwards.

[Forestluv]

Sounds like a good trip in which you entered a nondual state. Psychedelics can be a powerful spiritual tool and can be difficult to integrate.

Regarding dosage: tolerance skyrockets the first day. Although you only did 20ug and didn’t feel anything, it knocked the 2nd day effective dose down to around 110ug.

[Anton Rogachevski]

@How to be wise

Obviously I don't seek shortcuts nor expected to give me free spiritual growth. I used it to have a deep meaningful look onto my life. See where I'm deceiving myself to learn new insights about things I must change.

 

@Serotoninluv

Yes a good trip indeed! Now the only question is, do I need to go any deeper?

[Nahm]

@Anton Rogachevski Awesome report. Beautiful.            I hear you on “how did I not see it?”. Crazy stuff reality is, huh?

[Joseph Maynor]

Let the insights from this trip continue to trickle in for you.  This sounds like a great trip.  LSD is a great tool on the Path.  What's crazy is I almost don't want to do LSD again because the last one I had back in April was the most useful trip I've ever had in terms of insights.  I almost feel like if I trip again I will erase that one.  I know I need to do it again though and when I do I'll get a whole new set of insights.  But yeah, LSD gives you super-mindfulness.  You'll realize a lot of things are B.S. on LSD and you'll realize things you never even fully recognized before.  I also love how it spiritually cleanses you too.  LSD is like a spiritual tonic -- it cleans you out, it opens your heart.

Edited October 14, 2018 by Joseph Maynor

[Anton Rogachevski]

The first raw insights:

 

I've been on this path of personal development for about 5 years and have heared so much about mystical experiences, but never had a very deep non dual states, so I became very interested in having such an experience first hand. This legendery truth is much closer to everyday experience than I imagined it to be. I will attempt to put it into words as best as I can given the limitation of ideas and thoughts in describing pure reality.

Be mindful of the stream of consciousness currently in your experience, that is what we usually call "regular" experience, now multiply it's intensity and magnification by 10,000, and all of the sudden alot of things become very "bright" and cristal clear, alot of the doubt about yourself and your choises just lifts and you see everything as so obvious and easy. At this point I see god looking in the mirror and asking himself: "what is the source of experience?" And instantly the duality evaporates and I see an angel looking at himself fully realizes he's an angel of god, and sees that there is no source other than experience, experience is it's own source.

God created us angels to walk and explore it's infinte set of possibilty, to look at itself consciously and realize what a miracle it is to exist. Every point in this ever flowing experience is infinte, and is streaming towards the source and feeds back into itself. Every angel is god and is a channel for this infinte flow.

Now look in the mirror and see how you have welcomed this angel that is you, did you treat him with respect, did he feel welcome in your world? Is your house clean to recieve god? How did you treat this angel or other angels of god?

To feel complete a man must recognize and respect the divinty that is before him. We can look at this example as if the body is the house of god, but it's more than that, because the life you live and all that surrounds you is also your body, and ultimatly the body of god. That must be the meaning of building god a temple.

Low consciousness is a shadow in which demons thrive and can act covertly. High consciousness is a bright light that burns the demons alive, and all that's left is to enjoy the cleanliness.

Remember, the angel of god is always here, and when you take responsibility for your life you immediately win for the same amount you have put in.

The same thing goes for all other messangers of god: your friends, your relatives, and all angels. How would you treat them if you knew god send them?

God is not an idea, or far out there, he is right in front of you, if you don't see him you are blinded by low consciousness. Even a blind person sees god because all other senses are god too.

The cleaner the angels' body is the easier it is for him to recieve the flow of god's consciousness. It's so simple. Be an angel and act like an angel that is the essence.

So who are "people"? Angels who forget their godhood and forgot all other angels are god, and so they fight with each other about comfort. An angel who forgot who he is becomes a demon.

All these terms are obviously metaphorical, they come up to mind when you see these such an experience and you are it.
 

[outlandish]

9 hours ago, How to be wise said:

@Anton Rogachevski Just keep in mind that LSD will not give you any lasting spiritual growth. So just what are you aiming for with psychedelics. A good time? An interesting experience? Make sure you’re not escaping the hard work of self inquiry and turning inwards.

LSD won't directly give the lasting spiritual growth, but it sure can catalyze it, especially when taken in the spirit that OP describes. It really does have a tendency (for many people at least) to thrust inquiry into the nature of this existence right up front.

I mean, it does this so effectively that I think it would be hard to take LSD a bunch of times, and not experience personal growth. Of course there are exceptions to this, including mentally unstable and very young people.

[How to be wise]

@outlandish Look at Leo’s progress. He’s been taking LSD and 5-MeO for more than two years. He’s been doing 5 years of meditation and self-inquiry and he’s not even detached from his body, let alone full enlightenment. In my opinion the psychedelics got in the way. You need to pick one technique and go through with it to the end. Dabbling will not help.

[Leo Gura]

@Anton Rogachevski Excellent! Happy for ya

@How to be wise

11 hours ago, How to be wise said:

Just keep in mind that LSD will not give you any lasting spiritual growth.

Hogwash

You haven't even a clue yet how much spiritual growth LSD can trigger.

Being "full enlightened" is a totally wrong expectation. That's like refusing a million dollars because it wasn't the billion you wanted.

[Anton Rogachevski]

@Leo Gura

What worries me is the validity of the data collected. While I was in the trip it seemed undoubtedly true, yet upon leaving doubt returned and I can't yet escape the material paradigm in realizing it wasn't just hallucination. If one person becomes enlightened, or has an experience, how come all other people aren't at the same time. How is this seperation of experiences occurring? How to realize it's not just in my head?

[Leo Gura]

@Anton Rogachevski Keep tripping deeper and you will see.

You have only seen the tip of the iceberg so far.

[Forestluv]

5 hours ago, How to be wise said:

@outlandish Look at Leo’s progress. He’s been taking LSD and 5-MeO for more than two years. He’s been doing 5 years of meditation and self-inquiry and he’s not even detached from his body, let alone full enlightenment. In my opinion the psychedelics got in the way. You need to pick one technique and go through with it to the end. Dabbling will not help.

IME, spiritual practice + psychedelics has led to more progress in two years than 20 years of spiritual practice without psychedelics.

I’m curious about your direct experience with using psychedelics for spirituality. 

[pluto]

Great!

Simple, effective, experience

[Forestluv]

On 10/14/2018 at 5:27 AM, Anton Rogachevski said:

 

What worries me is the validity of the data collected. While I was in the trip it seemed undoubtedly true, yet upon leaving doubt returned and I can't yet escape the material paradigm in realizing it wasn't just hallucination. If one person becomes enlightened, or has an experience, how come all other people aren't at the same time. How is this seperation of experiences occurring? How to realize it's not just in my head?

This seems like an assumption that the sober state of mind is more real than the psychedelic state of mind.

Rather than asking whether the trip was just an hallucination, why not ask if your sober perspective is just an hallucination?

[outlandish]

On 10/14/2018 at 0:16 AM, How to be wise said:

@outlandish Look at Leo’s progress. He’s been taking LSD and 5-MeO for more than two years. He’s been doing 5 years of meditation and self-inquiry and he’s not even detached from his body, let alone full enlightenment. In my opinion the psychedelics got in the way. You need to pick one technique and go through with it to the end. Dabbling will not help.

What?! TWO whole years of work and he STILL isn't fully enlightened? Geesh, unbelievable.  I think you know as well as I do that this is a big work, it's not just like popping down to the local college to sign up for an undergrad degree!

I'd also like to know if you have any direct experience with psychedelics? It sounds to me like you are speaking out of puritanism and fear. It's excellent that we have different viewpoints on this forum, but we also have to speak honestly out of actual experience whenever possible, and not just speak from ideas that we've garnered from culture at large.

With psychedelics in particular there has been a great deal of misinformation, misunderstanding and fear spread around about them, which is unfortunate because they are tremendous tools for change, personal growth and healing. Luckily we're in era where the tides are turning around a bit on this, at a time when we probably need them the most.

[Anton Rogachevski]

@pluto  Indeed. Particularly in inspiring me to work on increasing consciousness, and cleaning up my way of life. Now I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

@Serotoninluv  Very good question! It's easier to doubt the short weird experience, rather than the long stable shared one.

[Forestluv]

20 minutes ago, Anton Rogachevski said:

 

@Serotoninluv  Very good question! It's easier to doubt the short weird experience, rather than the long stable shared one.

So true ? 

[How to be wise]

@outlandish Everything that I know about psychedelics came from Actualized.org. And no, I haven’t taken them before. In a way that is good because I can speak about them in a detached way. If I had a psychedelic experience, I would be elated by it and would be defending psychedelics. 

The only reason I think that it’s ineffective is because Leo has been using them for two years and is still not enlightened. I’m sure you could learn a lot from it, but if there is no change to your mind structure, it’s a waste of time. Focus instead on some very strong techniques available on Leo’s booklist.

 

[Forestluv]

8 minutes ago, How to be wise said:

@outlandish Everything that I know about psychedelics came from Actualized.org. And no, I haven’t taken them before. In a way that is good because I can speak about them in a detached way. If I had a psychedelic experience, I would be elated by it and would be defending psychedelics. 

The only reason I think that it’s ineffective is because Leo has been using them for two years and is still not enlightened. I’m sure you could learn a lot from it, but if there is no change to your mind structure, it’s a waste of time. Focus instead on some very strong techniques available on Leo’s booklist.

 

If other areas of spirituality resonate with you, great - go for it.

Regarding  psychedelics within spirituality, this is a naive view.