Natasha

Enlightenment Jokes Here

2,277 posts in this topic

15 hours ago, Emerald Wilkins said:

A monk walks up to a street-side hot dog cart.

The hot dog cart's vendor asks the monk, "What can I get for you?"

The monk says, "Can you make me one with everything?"

So the vendor d o e s make him one with everything, and hands him that hot dog.

The monk searches his robes and finds a twenty dollar bill, hands it to the vendor.

He waits....and waits....and waits... . Finally, the monk asks: "What about my change?"

The vendor replies: "Change can only come from within."

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44 minutes ago, Markus said:

So the vendor d o e s make him one with everything, and hands him that hot dog.

The monk searches his robes and finds a twenty dollar bill, hands it to the vendor.

He waits....and waits....and waits... . Finally, the monk asks: "What about my change?"

The vendor replies: "Change can only come from within."

That's amazing. xD


Check out my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/thediamondnet 

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tumblr_n2g8pv1HXx1tuoms4o1_500.gif.9135d

 

On enlightenment path... :D ( SO funny LOL) 


Ayla,

www.aylabyingrid.com

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A Zen student asked his master, "Is it OK to use email?"

"Yes," replied the master, "But no attachments." 


They want reality, so I give 'em a fatal dosage.

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Master: Tell me a joke about Enlightenment.

Disciple: Master, Enlightenment is a very serious thing.

Master Laughs Out Loud.

Disciple: What are you laughing about Master?

Master: Nothing.


Because Dragons

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Disciple :     Master, if "I" attain enlightenment, will I gain the ability to perform illusions? The Master laughed and laughed...........

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A master and his disciple are on a journey. They reach a river were a woman is waiting because she is not able to cross the river by herself. The master takes the woman on his shoulders, crosses the river and places the woman safely on the other side.

The master and his disciple continue their journey.

After 5 hours the anxious disciple asks his master; `Master please, can I ask an important question?`

Master; `Tell me your question.`

Disciple; `Master I do not understand. You took a vow never to touch a woman in your life but at the river you have carried a woman on your shoulders?! I do not understand this?!`

Master; `I just took a woman on my shoulders but you are  already carrying the woman for 5 hours in your head...!`9_9

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Reminds me of this one (told by J. Krishnamurti):

“There are three monks, who had been sitting in deep meditation for many years amidst the Himalayan snow peaks, never speaking a word, in utter silence. One morning, one of the three suddenly speaks up and says, ‘What a lovely morning this is.’ And he falls silent again. Five years of silence pass, when all at once the second monk speaks up and says, ‘But we could do with some rain.’ There is silence among them for another five years, when suddenly the third monk says, ‘Why can’t you two stop chattering?”

Edited by Toby

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The funniest part in this is that Paul Smit and Lisa Cairns are acting in this scene:

 

 

Addiction ....

 

 

There are also some more or less funny episodes in this playlist:

 

 

 

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A seeker has heard the wisest Guru in all of India lives atop India's highest mountain. So the seeker treks over hill andDelhi until he reaches the fabled mountain.  It's incredibly steep , and more than once he slips and falls. By the time he reaches the top he is full of cuts and bruises, but there is the guru, sitting cross legged in front of his cave. 

"Oh wise Guru,", the seeker says, "Tell me what is the meaning of life?"

"ah yes the secret of life" the guru says scratching his chin. "the secret of life is a teacup."

"A tea cup? I came all the way up here to ask you what the secret of life is and you tell me it's a tea cup?"

The guru Shrugs "So maybe it isn't a tea cup."

xD

 

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