Why Has Dating Collapsed? The Real Reason No One Talks About

[CARDOZZO]

8 minutes ago, theleelajoker said:

Re content, I agree.

But I don't get the context. My point was that re @CARDOZZO it is not plausible to make a post about "lot's of sex or sex opportunity doesn't make me happy" while saying sex is not a priority.

People that don't have sex as priority don't use dating apps, or if they do they don't have 30 contacts and 20 matches (don't recall the exact numbers) re sexual contacts, and they don't do posts about their sex life in a forum. They don't approach many girls, they don't have an approach or philosophy about how to talk to girls or how they get to sex, because their thoughts don't touch these topics so much. 

It's like saying "I don't care about football while being in a football stadium watching a game lol"

 

It is not a question of caring or not. You will crave sex if you have libido no matter what you told yourself about consciousness or god.

That's my final post here on this thread. 

Edited February 19 by CARDOZZO

[Lila9]

On 18/02/2026 at 1:29 PM, Miguel1 said:

Also, in no way was I implying all women, just low quality women that comes in abundance to your life with hardcore pickup phase.

You would know what I mean, if you actually had gone through this phase.

Dude, no matter what, you never call women trash!

I don’t care if it is a figure of speech, literally or you are just insecure incel.
I don’t care that you had a predatory phase in which you manipulated young women to sleep with you. 

You and your pick up cult should be held accountable for your shitty behavior towards young women. I hope that karma will do justice with people like you.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

12 hours ago, Lila9 said:

Dude, no matter what, you never call women trash!

I don’t care if it is a figure of speech, literally or you are just insecure incel.
I don’t care that you had a predatory phase in which you manipulated young women to sleep with you. 

You and your pick up cult should be held accountable for your shitty behavior towards young women. I hope that karma will do justice with people like you.

Dehumanising language - ie calling women 'trash' I agree is not on.

Personal character attacks - ie labelling someone 'incel' is also not on.

Critique behaviour or arguments - not identities. If you want to be heard, keep it focused on conduct and ideas.

That goes for everyone. These topics are hard enough as it is to remain unbiased and fair.

[Infinite Tsukuyomi]

Definitely no one reason why dating has collapsed. The collapse is a symptom of even deeper problems. As a gay man I've also come to the conclusion that most guys are undateable. Definitely not just a woman problem, but everyone is contributing to the mess in some way. I had a good guy but let him go. Fearful avoidant attachment style is a mother. He was hardcore anxious preoccupied. 

No one thinks they are a part of the problem, and as such the dating pool is filled with undateable people. 

[Kid A]

4 hours ago, Infinite Tsukuyomi said:

No one thinks they are a part of the problem, and as such the dating pool is filled with undateable people. 

Well said. And the more you focus on how others are the problem, the bigger part of the problem you become. 

[bazera]

@Infinite Tsukuyomi

Quote

most guys are undateable

What do you mean by this? What issues do you come across most often that make people undateable for you?

[AION]

I got this from Owen Cook and I think he makes some good points. I will try to paraphrase as good as I can: In the past patriarchy forced women to be loyal because if she started acting hypergamous aka dick hopping they would be shamed and ostracized by their community. It was kind of helpful for the community and child raising. But with the destruction of the patriarchal frame (which was hold by the family members) women have the freedom to act more from their true nature which is egoistic and hypergamous. So according to stats 80% of the population of women want the top 10-20% of men. That is how female animals act like chimps(female chimps only want to mate with the best men). But the difference between chimps and men is that having multiple families is not ok so a lot of women end up as side " girls"  and never get wifed up by Chad and Tyrone. In my opinion this is a great development because I think these women shouldn't be reproducing in the first place. This is necessary stage in conscious development. Yes we will see a demographic crash and very soon, in 10-20 years we will see a huge spike in mental health problems in women. But the gene is out of the box and it is a necessary stage in our collective development. Perhaps it is even good for earth that there is a crash in human population. God idd works in mysterious ways.

Edited 11 hours ago by AION

[Kid A]

42 minutes ago, AION said:

I got this from Owen Cook and I think he makes some good points. I will try to paraphrase as good as I can: In the past patriarchy forced women to be loyal because if she started acting hypergamous aka dick hopping they would be shamed and ostracized by their community. It was kind of helpful for the community and child raising. But with the destruction of the patriarchal frame (which was hold by the family members) women have the freedom to act more from their true nature which is egoistic and hypergamous. So according to stats 80% of the population of women want the top 10-20% of men. That is how female animals act like chimps(female chimps only want to mate with the best men). But the difference between chimps and men is that having multiple families is not ok so a lot of women end up as side " girls"  and never get wifed up by Chad and Tyrone. In my opinion this is a great development because I think these women shouldn't be reproducing in the first place. This is necessary stage in conscious development. Yes we will see a demographic crash and very soon, in 10-20 years we will see a huge spike in mental health problems in women. But the gene is out of the box and it is a necessary stage in our collective development. Perhaps it is even good for earth that there is a crash in human population. God idd works in mysterious ways.

So it's women who are to blame here, which means we as guys don't have to take responsibility, look inward, and do the painful self-reflection needed to improve, become more attractive and less selfish human beings. Lucky us! 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@Kid A 🤣 

In before 'its not women's fault they are disgusting creatures, it is just their nature, we men need to adjust to their feral behaviours' and 'any man who disagrees is naive and hoodwinked by women' 

I am so filthy, don't you see!!!! 

[AION]

18 minutes ago, Kid A said:

So it's women who are to blame here, which means we as guys don't have to take responsibility, look inward, and do the painful self-reflection needed to improve, become more attractive and less selfish human beings. Lucky us! 

Men should do that and become Gods. But that doesn't change what I said. Universe is not black and white you dummy.  

But the thing is if I have to become God-like (the whole package like women say) to get a little above average girl, I'm not going to settle for a worn out girl who has a higher body count than John Wick.

That is what most women don't get, you get what you give. And most of them expect too much for what they are offering. But that is their problem.

Edited 10 hours ago by AION

[Kid A]

2 hours ago, AION said:

Men should do that and become Gods. But that doesn't change what I said. Universe is not black and white you dummy.

Okay, Mr. “Everything Is Women’s Fault” and “Do the Opposite of What Women Say and You’re Good.”

2 hours ago, AION said:

But the thing is if I have to become God-like (the whole package like women say) to get a little above average girl, I'm not going to settle for a worn out girl who has a higher body count than John Wick.

God-like? Hah! Just to reach women’s level, we would have to reduce 75% of the violence we commit in the world and 98% of the rapes. At the same time, we would have to reduce most of the misogyny that men like you stand for, which gives women far fewer rights than men all over the world. The same goes for video games, which most boys/men seem pretty blind to the repulsiveness of, as well as bad hygiene and general grossness.

2 hours ago, AION said:

That is what most women don't get, you get what you give. And most of them expect too much for what they are offering. But that is their problem.

It seems like this is a big problem for you. You’re whining about feminism and shit like this almost every day here. You wouldn’t do that if you weren’t very emotionally invested.

 

[AION]

@Kid A you are just here to troll man. Just contemplate what I said and list 3 key insights. Let's see how open minded you are mister wise guy.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

2 minutes ago, AION said:

@Kid A you are just here to troll man. Just contemplate what I said and list 3 key insights. Let's see how open minded you are mister wise guy.

He raises some good points.

I do question a lot of what you claim, as you often repeat manosphere / social media dialogues and claims almost to the T. You repeat all the main red pill catch phrases a lot. Not sure if you realise this, as it can happen when you are immersed in what algorithms feed you. 

[Kid A]

4 minutes ago, AION said:

@Kid A you are just here to troll man. Just contemplate what I said and list 3 key insights. Let's see how open minded you are mister wise guy.

Okay, since you call me a troll, I’ll do it. 

[Infinite Tsukuyomi]

5 hours ago, bazera said:

@Infinite Tsukuyomi

What do you mean by this? What issues do you come across most often that make people undateable for you?

1) To me this means they are not aware of their attachment style for one. People want to know what your zodiac sign is, but not your attachment style, like wtf?? So the relationships that just so happen to form are toxic. Many of which could grow into healthy relating if they just knew their style, worked on it, and used the appropriate protocol for their BFs style.

2) Many of the gay/bi men are hypnotized by the idea that they have a lot of options, because there are so many men everyday entering our marketplace and lots of dating app users. There are way more DL men that I originally thought. In some sense they do have a lot of sexual options. When I listen to gay men on podcasts/shorts etc they say they want to date. They are also unaware that by participating in hookup culture, they help perpetuate the culture. Sex > Dating for most of us. It is so easy to get, it's ridiculous. I've fallen for the idea that there were a bunch of guys I could potentially date as well, nope. 

3) For me, some guys simply have nothing to say. I like to have good conversations with the person I'm with. I went on a date with a model last year but he hardly contributed to the text conversations. I've had the best luck with guys I was able to convince to facetime, where I can lead an engaging conversation. He and a lot of gay/bi men just want to be wanted from what I can tell. He insisted he was interested, but it seemed more like he just wanted someone to be after him. 

4) There are also all sorts of incompatibilities, especially with the sexual categories: top, bottom, side, vers, upside down (this one's a joke). Tops are favored and bottoms are often seen as slutty for having the same body count as a top. Too many have set down to define what a relationship that they say yes to is. 

5) Telling the Truth is all but nonexistent. Asking for what we want in every conceivable way is important. My ex was mad at me once for not ever buying him flowers even though he never told me he liked them, never even a hint. I would always buy him candy and other things but not flowers, because I didn't know. He also brought me a flower once, I don't care for flowers. Doing what you partner wants is such a low hanging fruit. Things like that, sexual kinks and emotions go untold. He and I were asked for what we wanted except for a few specific things, like the flowers. And that was the longest relationship I had. In the past I've had BFs and others with potential laugh at or dismiss me as well. There's an undertone of shame for wanting what you want.  

I contribute to the problem by being pretty picky myself, I do like a good looking guy. I've done work on my attachment style but my nervous system still has a pretty acute response of danger to engulfment (since I attract a lot of anxious preoccupied men). I took a few courses on Thais Gibson's personal development school for my attachment style and for AP (which I attract most often). I can't be the only one doing the work though, and even then, is the work good enough?

[AION]

3 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

He raises some good points.

I do question a lot of what you claim, as you often repeat manosphere / social media dialogues and claims almost to the T. You repeat all the main red pill catch phrases a lot. Not sure if you realise this, as it can happen when you are immersed in what algorithms feed you. 

So which points did you like? To me he sounded snarky, emotional and straw manning towards my points. He acts like I don't agree that men should improve. Obviously they should. But if I would become the "full package" as women say I wouldn't settle down, since I would belong to the 10-20% of men and have a lot of options. At that point I would just play the field and have as much fun as I can until it is time to have kids.

Edited 3 hours ago by AION

[Rafael Thundercat]

Dating is also complicated becaus most of the Secure Attachment folks are mating and staying together so the most part of people you will find in different ages are people who are wounded 

This guy have a point

 

[Valach]

11 minutes ago, Rafael Thundercat said:

Dating is also complicated becaus most of the Secure Attachment folks are mating and staying together so the most part of people you will find in different ages are people who are wounded 

This guy have a point

 

Recently discovered this channel and i love it!

[Natasha Tori Maru]

1 hour ago, Rafael Thundercat said:

Dating is also complicated becaus most of the Secure Attachment folks are mating and staying together so the most part of people you will find in different ages are people who are wounded 

This guy have a point

 

Attachment styles are huge in attraction and dating. 

Unfortunately, we can be quite blind to them until we recognise the pattern - because they originate from being shown an incorrect or malformed version of bonding/love stemming from infancy. Typically one endures the pattern until something clicks, or the person begins to self analyse relationship trends they fall into. The concept and understanding of love those with attachment issues have is not really what love is. They misunderstand love/bonding  and secure attachment. Healthy love is mistaken for lack of love.

I used to suffer from ambivalent or fearful avoidance. My relationships all followed a broken pattern of terrible boundaries stemming from being shown love from broken parents. I have since done a lot of work to break and heal previous patterns. I consider myself securely attached now.

Edited 28 minutes ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Rafael Thundercat]

I dated an avoidand Girl from Poland once. All the dynamics waas exactly as it is described in this video. 

Later in life I meet her again and guess what, she was still in the same situation. Worst, she got pregnant from a man that became violent to her, they broke up and she did and abortion that ended very bad for her body. I could not feel anything when I heard about that from one of our friends in common, I was not happy and not sad, I just could see clearly that she was just getting the consequences of her lack of clarity in relationships. As the last pist from Leo about relationships. If you be selfish you will ruin it. No matter with who you engage with. You can make the most of any relationship if you apply Truth and Love to it. Mature Love.