Falling into a trap of hating couples .

[Rishabh R]

Sorry everyone who is committed but I being a 23 year old single hates couples. It makes me extremely angry when I see couples. I have talked to more than 60 girls in my life but I don't know why I hate to see girls with their boyfriends on my college campus. Even I become angry at seeing young couples in public but I don't become angry when I see older like mature couples. Why is that ? I have watched Leo's how to get laid series multiple times. I fear that if I would get arranged married then what would happen, like I would cry a lot cause my friends are having girlfriends and I think that they will get love married( it is called love marriage in India when a boy gets married according to his own choice). I have tried Cole Hasting's Ultimate self mastery course and applied the worksheets diligently. It said to develop a growth mindset.So my question is that is it right for me to be optimistic that this will change and then go about taking action. Any adversity or setbacks like rejection or threat is temporary and continue to act ? I have continued to talk to girls despite getting threats, rejections still with no girlfriend . However this is the final semester in my college after that I think I will get no chance - is it correct or just my assumption ?

[Schizophonia]

Because you’re dissociated, in deny of your needs. This is why you tell yourself you have to be "detached" lol.

No, really accept wanting a girlfriend and everything that come with that. If you are experiencing psychological difficulties due to learned helplessness, deal with the problem with a psychologist and/or a seduction coach.

You have hatred because you think that something is being stolen from you, but it's just in your head, no one wants to persecute you and prevent you from achieving this goal, on the contrary. Relax, release, and move toward that goal.

[Butters]

12 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Because you’re dissociated, in deny of your needs. This is why you tell yourself you have to be "detached" lol.

No, really accept wanting a girlfriend and everything that come with that. If you are experiencing psychological difficulties due to learned helplessness, deal with the problem with a psychologist and/or a seduction coach.

You have hatred because you think that something is being stolen from you, but it's just in your head, no one wants to persecute you and prevent you from achieving this goal, on the contrary. Relax, release, and move toward that goal.

Note that you are typing this as if everybody is living in the West, but OP is posting this from India and talking about arranged marriage for him. 

[Rishabh R]

I had a call from my father and he told me to stop focussing  on that as it doesn't matter but rather focussing on your career cause everything will come after making your career.

[Butters]

I don't know much about this but you might be helped by finding communities online of young people growing up with Indian / Asian parents. 

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBt0ZKv9pBA

https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-get-rid-jealousy-mostly#:~:text=Jealousy of Guys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wX4rSFdp1-A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EFAD_H3phY

 

Edited July 27, 2024 by Raze

[Yimpa]

37 minutes ago, Butters said:

I don't know much about this but you might be helped by finding communities online of young people growing up with Indian / Asian parents. 

My parents are Filipino. They make some of the cheesiest dramas and romance flicks, I highly recommend it.

Edited July 27, 2024 by Yimpa

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, Butters said:

Note that you are typing this as if everybody is living in the West, but OP is posting this from India and talking about arranged marriage for him. 

No

[Yimpa]

1 hour ago, Butters said:

Note that you are typing this as if everybody is living in the West, but OP is posting this from

 

[Nemra]

Having a relationship with someone could really affect your life negatively. In less developed countries, it could really bring you down and create unnecessary problems if you aren't financially secure. Yes, hating them is a trap, but surrendering to the idea of having a relationship is also a trap. In most relationships, people end up having kids. Think about how you can have enough money for your child to buy things that he/she wants. Think of how you can reduce money problems for your relationship to be more about your partner. I also don't like arranged marriages. I think it's way more problematic and should be avoided, as it's a source of drama.

Edited July 27, 2024 by Nemra

[Rishabh R]

@Nemra yeah that could be a problem 

 

[aurum]

7 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

Why is that ?

Because you want what they have.

[Yimpa]

6 hours ago, Nemra said:

Having a relationship with someone could really affect your life negatively.

Absolutely. I feel like my body has aged 6 years in only 6 months. God knows what’ll happen in the next 60 minutes… I’m officially moving in with them 

[Emotionalmosquito]

10 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

on the contrary

 

[Emotionalmosquito]

 

[Rishabh R]

@aurum yeah absolutely but now is not the correct time as placements will be beginning in my college in few months or so.