doucey24

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About doucey24

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  1. Hey man, What I've found is that this entire yo-yo pattern is the best possible thing that can be happening. Your ego is slowly dying off. Your spirit is slowly strengthening. These moments of deep inner turmoil are when the ego is most enraged and desperately trying to prevent some part of itself from permanent death. No doubt you have already noticed that after weathering these storms, you experience some of your lightest days as your spirit celebrates its greater integration into your new identity. Then the process must repeat. The emotional depth of your process tells me that your growth is profound and deeply rooted at a core level - knowing this doesn't make it any easier on you, but have the faith that once your spirit turns the tables of momentum, you will feel absolutely in awe of the inner strength, worth, love and hope you have rooted so unshakably within you. With regard to self-esteem. If you really, truly want to flip the momentum of your own energy/beliefs/subconscious actions/thoughts etc. from self-loathing, worthlessness, unlovability, fears of insignificance, mediocrity, meaninglessness etc. to love, worth, confidence, self-belief, self-trust, and a sense of inner-completeness and unconditional perfection etc., it is an absolute MUST that you follow these three steps: Find your core-thought. Trace a few thoughts (especially negative thoughts, judgments, criticisms) to their terminus - they will always lead you to a consistent core thought that express an egoic fear and/or core belief about your egoic identity - (e.g. I fear of dying as a mediocre person because that would prove that I my life really is worthless, insignificant and meaningless). This is extremely important. Do this on enough thoughts and you will powerfully realise that every thought you have is connected to a consistent theme around your ego's identity/fear. Take any of these thoughts and trace the natural consequences of your continuing to let them play out subconsciously. This will show you how powerfully self-prophetic these thoughts tend to be - as in, they tend to create the exact reality you most fear (e.g. worthlessness) and the exact identity you most don't want to be (e.g. I'm worthless) Finally and MOST IMPORTANTLY - more than anything else, I can't stress this enough - create a voice recording of new core beliefs, thoughts, ideas that are the exact opposite of the core-thought theme that currently exists in your subconscious mind. These should be highly empowering and positive. Put some spiritual, uplifting music in the background. Listen to it everyday for 100-150 days. FEEL, as best you can, that is is true. Bring the new beliefs/thoughts to life with EMOTION. Now I know that Leo has said the subconscious mind both does and does not exist - its highly nuanced depending on your perspective etc. But in this case, lets keep it simple and frame it this way. Try this an experiment. Maybe it will or won't work. Maybe I do have a subconscious mind that harbors beliefs and generates approximately 95% of my actions. Maybe these core beliefs can be changed through constant repetition and emotional involvement. Maybe that will being to effect all my actions that stem from these core beliefs/thoughts. Maybe not. Maybe this is all bullshit. Oh well, my current strategy of not doing this ain't working out anymore. I'm willing to risk 100-150 days for potentially life-changing results. I'll commit and let the experience be my evidence. As a highly skeptical and rational person this was extremely important for me to say to myself before I tried this. Anyway, at the end of the 150 days I guarantee you that your life will have drastically changed. And not in a yo-yo fashion. Sure there will be ups and downs, moments of fear, moments of extreme resistance to listening to the recording. That's the point. You are literally programming yourself to believe things that empower your spirit - hence, part of your old ego will have to die. But this method means that the death will be permanent and not a frustrating backlash that takes you back to square one (like the experience you're in now). Bear in mind. Missing a day is exactly the thing that will unhinge you. Hence why a voice recording is the a must. Writing it out won't cut it. Affirmations won't either. In a state of extreme resistance, these methods are simply too risky. With a voice recording, you can at least let it do the work. You just do your best to listen and feel the words to be true. Even if it's a shitty, mechanical process sometimes, it's better than skipping days and shooting yourself in the foot. If, with every fiber of your being, you commit to listening to it daily and feeling into it with as much emotion as possible, you are guaranteed to move out of this yo-yo phase forever. Your life will take a certain trajectory far beyond the boundaries and walls that you have repeatedly hit your head upon and made you doubt whether it is even possible to break out beyond them. As the new thoughts take root in your subconscious mind, all of your actions will subtly begin to change of their own accord and this will ripple into profound growth and tangible results. This happened for me and it's beyond remarkable. I feel like I have set down concrete love in my soul through this process and my life is more on track across the board than ever before. Good luck!
  2. This entire CD was made for psychedelics. Incredibly uplifting, super stimulating. Orgasmic listening.
  3. I assume Australia is off the radar for now as well. We are essentially one of the most impractical places to travel to after all
  4. I have a question about the mastery process - the answer I am seeking is to help with my metaphysical and practical understanding of reality. So mastery, in the context of the ego = patience + consistent, repeated, actions (often little, mundane, and/or emotionally difficult in nature) + significant time (usually years) = compounding effect + massive results. As I acquire more life experience, it seems to me that there is no rushing, side-stepping, coaxing, faking or fooling this process into yielding quicker, easier results. At least not results of the same calibre this process brings - those sustainable, meticulous, pure, clean, complete results. From the deeper, non-dual perspective, the 'mastery' rhythm at which a tree grows or a human ego masters a craft, is really describing the way in which consciousness itself unfolds, expands, grows, and propagates itself towards some end or result. This seems to be a 'natural' rhythm in of all growth, in nature, in humans, in the unfolding of life at large, but my question is why is this so? Although I have psychedelic and meditation experience and non-dual mystical experiences under my belt, I have not experienced any genuine insight as to why consciousness, generally speaking, expands itself at this uncanny, stable rhythm - the 'mastery' rhythm. My mere theory is that it is simply the way things are in our particular splice of Absolute Infinite. Those who have experienced more radical levels of consciousness, have you come across any other explanation for why these mastery principles seem to capture a deeper truth about the unfolding of consciousness in our reality? @Leo Gura @Joseph Maynor @Serotoninluv
  5. Arnold Schwarzenegger: Arnold: The Education of a Bodybuilder. 10/10 for inspiration. I read it in one sitting and had tears of joy as his story bloomed beyond my wildest imaginations. Fantastic if you are looking for life purpose motivation. Lots of insights into the mind and actions of an extraordinary person. However, I have grown spiritually since I first read it and can see how my current self would resonate with it less. If you are familiar with spiral dynamics, I'd say this is mostly a stage orange book. Abraham Lincoln: Team of Rivals by Doris Kearns Goodwin. 9.5/10. Jam packed with fascinating historical information. But in between the events a man of extraordinary goodness and perserverence emerges. Not only inspiring but Lincoln's example fills you with hope and wisdom and lifts your personal motivations to a virtuous plane. Once again, in relation to spiral dynamics, I'd say this would appeal to almost any stage. Lincoln is such a complex and deep personality which is why I think his character resonates to some extent with most people. Hope these help. I am after more inspiring biograpahies myself!
  6. Today I was doing some creative work at my desk. I was in a state of flow and I felt this feeling (which is becoming more frequent and familiar) of a spontaneous 'spike' in my consciousness occurring. To provide some background info on these 'spikes', they usually begin as a feeling of pressure building inside my head followed by a sudden 'releases' or 'spikes' of energy. Each spike is accompanied by a single, very faint, brief and sharp, 'creaking' noise I hear from somewhere inside my forehead/brain region. After each spike occurs, and there can be 3/4 in a session, I feel my awareness leap upwards, so to speak. As this happens, I usually just stop what I'm doing and stare directly forward and tune into this feeling experience further. I sometimes enter into samadhi-esque states - as in I briefly am able to tap into a minor level of non-dual awareness. Then it eventually fades and I return to what I'm doing. This happens fairly regularly and of its own accord - I don't do anything to induce these moments. I'm not sure if anyone can relate or inform me further regarding this? Anyway, when it happened today, it was particularly odd. I felt this cerebral sensation of rising consciousness whilst working, and I decided to turn my chair to look at myself in the mirror on the wall next to me. I was looking at my reflection as my visual experience was becoming increasingly 'hazy' and 'lucid'. Then all of a sudden, I saw a different person in the mirror. It was as if someone had been superimposed over my reflection, like some kind of hologram. The effect of it kind of reminded me of a psychedelic visual. The face looked like it belonged to a historical person. I intuitively felt he was from the 18th or 19th century. Not only did his hairstyle and features give me this impression, but his attire, which was also superimposed over my normal clothes, was a kind of navy blue uniform resembling some kind of blazer (the kind you might see in a portrait painting). I felt a deep sense of both unease and intrigue as I looked into his eyes, and again, I intuitively felt that I was looking at someone who had actually existed in the past. I am both a rational and spiritual person - skeptical yet very openminded. I meditate daily and have experience with psychedelics. Having said that, I've never been involved or particularly interested in paranormal phenomena. However, I am wondering, is there anything I should be aware of to help me understand this experience?
  7. Hey guys, A fairly well-known YouTube psychedelic/spirituality channel called Your Mate Tom made an interesting video on ego death a week or so ago. He is an experienced ex-psychonaut and has had some pretty intense/deep trips and insights as a result. What do you guys think of his understanding of the ego and ego death?
  8. Think of young Arnold Schwarzenegger. His drive to become the best bodybuilder in the world is something that moves me with its deep beauty. Whilst he lived by certain higher-consciousness principles, his drive was undoubtedly neurotic (at least to begin with) and egoic/egocentric. But it was beautiful nonetheless and because of it we have his story. Now I'm not saying I am Arnie, but I know a similar drive is in me. I am working on my LP and self-actualization habits and am making progress every month. I see where my life is going with a vision that is getting clearer and clearer. The only trouble is, my drive is fundamentally neurotic/egoic - I mean how can it not be when I still believe that I exist as a person.. But the more I meditate and the more consciousness I cultivate, I fear/intuit that deepening my awareness/understanding of Truth will somehow hamper MY drive. This drive is what I am relying upon to follow through on my LP and full potential - it gives me the emotional juice/fuel to go on, just like it did for Arnie. I don't know if I'm over-analysing or over-reacting, but I don't want my awakening process to pacify my purpose. It's almost as if I am willing to suffer as an ego (at least for the foreseeable future) just to nourish my current drive before I inevitably seriously pursue enlightenment after which a significant part of my LP will hopefully be realised. I should also mention that my life purpose is not as self-centred as Arnie's (i.e. becoming that most muscular man in the world) and more selfless/focused on helping others, but I feel my hunger to realise it comes from my egoic paradigm. Anyway, a part of me senses that I am making an issue out of a non-issue and that this is because I am still neurotic and fundamentally unfulfilled by my current life/self. Also because I think my theoretical understanding of enlightenment is still confused at the moment. But I kind of feel like I need to fill the void in me before I can transcend it. Would appreciate any advice. Thanks.
  9. Without giving too much away in @Leo Gura 's Life Purpose course, I have a query regarding the medium I choose to master to express my LP with the world. Leo always says to focus on ONE thing - one Life purpose to follow, one area of expertise to master, one medium to creatively express it etc. But in Leo's case, he initially tried blogging/writing then switched to speaking/vlogging but now is also writing a book. So he in fact is honing two mediums to express it, writing and speaking. Is it okay to have a 'major' and 'minor' medium so to speak for delivering your LP? In my case, I get strong intuitive emotions that I should be working on BOTH speaking and writing to communicate my LP. For me it feels that I have a calling in both but I also practiaclly understand that focusing on one would yield better results in the mastery process of that medium. What are your thoughts?
  10. @Leo Gura In contemporary times or for millennia to come? Do you think enlightenment will spread exponentially? Because if that's roughly a fixed percentage it seems like humanity is most definitely doomed - not that that forecast is either a 'good' or 'bad' outcome, I say this matter-of-factly.
  11. Hey guys, A while ago I read the self-help book 'Miracle Morning' by Hal Elrod. In a nutshell, the book is about the life-changing power of installing one particular habit - i.e. the Miracle Morning habit. The habit is as follows: Wake up at 5 or 6am (ensuring that the last thoughts you have the night before are positive - e.g. 'I am so lucky to have X hours of sleep tonight, this is the perfect amount I need for a deep and refreshing sleep' - in other words, programming your subconscious mind to be more willing to wake up early especially on nights when you've had to stay up later/had less sleep - ideally the aim is to go to bed at 10ish to get a full 8 hours though). Spend the next hour doing a routine called S-A-V-E-R-S which involves: Meditation, Affirmations, Visualisation, Journaling, Reading (self-help/educational books), Exercising (light yoga/stretching/jogging etc.) Each activity you split up into 5-10min intervals and order them how you wish. Also - you can choose to either do this 7days a week or for only 5 days during the working week depending on your situation. So by 6am/7am you've completed the hour of activities and go on with your day. I was able to keep it up for 43 days and noticed an incredible difference in my mood, productivity and general sense of fulfillment. I also scrapped the reading activity as I found it was low-yield and I instead lengthened my meditation time. However, the habit eventually crumpled during my final month-long exam period of my undergrad degree (as by that point I resented being at uni and felt like a slave to the study and essentially became too disenchanted by the workload, regressing back to smoking weed etc. and thus the habit eventually died out). Now that my horizons are free and I'm restarting the slow implementation of my LP/self-actualization habits, I was wondering if the Miracle Morning is a realistic habit to install (given that it consists of 5-6 activities which can be viewed as separate habits in and of themselves). I'm not sure if the habit is too extreme/unrealistic (at least during the early phases of the self-actualizing journey) and if I am setting myself up for a big ego-backlash. Another part of me thinks that my previous failure was due to an isolated incident - i.e. finishing off my uni commitments as I felt forced to see my degree through to the end (although I admit I was fundamentally free to quit studying if I wanted to but that is now neither here nor there). Would like to know what you think about the habit @Leo Gura but would appreciate opinions of others. Thanks everyone!
  12. I recently read Cal Newport's 'So Good They Can't Ignore You'. Although I gained some valuable insights from the book, I found Cal's views regarding Life Purpose to be overly rational and narrow-minded. He especially underestimates the powerful role intuitive emotions and vision play in the discovery and selection process. He also seems to have a pragmatic rather than emotional bent, and thus his worldview remains obscured from a certain 'spiritual' essence that enriches one's LP and the self-actualizing path as a whole. Or maybe his advice really does just apply more to common masses and that's what they want to hear right now: 'do the work you have (and grow to love it as you master it), not the work you love'. Anyway, what do you guys think about his ideas? How do they integrate with some of Leo's ideas about LP?
  13. @Leo Gura Hey Leo, what is the update with your bold life change regarding Actualized.org? I.e. The pursuit of achievement/success/keeping Actualized.org alive VS turning inward to purely pursue Truth/self-mastery. By the way, on your LinkedIn page, it says that your marketing business 'LPG' is still presently running. Are you still running it / or at least passively earning from it? Also, how much of your vision do you still relate to from your 2014 video entitled 'True Vision - I Reveal My Life Purpose Until You Can Feel It'? Sorry for all the prying questions, but finally, what can we expect of Actualized.org over the next year or so?