Immortal peace

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About Immortal peace

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  1. Thanks for the advices. I would keep you guys informed on how things turn out in the coming months.
  2. I feel like killing someone(no jokes). I have this rush of anger all across my body which I want to take out on someone and kill him/her. Everyone I was close to and loved so much have used me and thrown me like a napkin. My friends(15 years), my parents and my relatives. All girls that I have approached in the last two years flat out rejected me and I just don't have any interest in even talking to the opposite sex anymore. I am visually impaired and had a catastrophic brain injury that left me with permanent disabilities that are not visible to others. I suffer from urinary incontinence and people often makes a disgusted face when I am near them and some often say that dude you stink, even though I take shower e dry day the smell does not goes away.After my catastrophic injuries, I was given a huge settlement money from which I bought a house that gives me rentalomey and pit the rest of the money in structure that guarantees me $1500 per month until I turn 67(am 34 now). I still live with my parents since they help me with a number of things that I cannot do on my own. I have realized that everyone have been nice to me for the past 8 years and used me for financial purposes,and now they don't even give a ship as I don't spend money on them, or they have themselves become financially well off. It just cut connection with all my friends and have stopped talking to my parents at all. The there is this crazy rage inside me, and I get these thoughts during the day just to kill someone(a girl like one of the dozens that rejected me), or any random person. Sometimes I feel like leaving everything and just go somewhere far away. Sometimes I killing myself. I need to take this rage out somewhere or else my body would explode. I haven't talked to any one on a personal level in 8 months now. I tried meditation and it helped me for a bit, but now it seems to making this rage energy in my body worse. I even tried finding a job to get myself busy, but due to my vision and the nature of my head injury(constant headaches), it is a big challenge to find an employer willing to hire me. Should I go to a mental hospital? Cuz I would certainly turn psychopath in the coming months and kill some one.
  3. A super nuclear bomb that would explode the entire universe 😉
  4. Someone pushing from the back and made me fall of tge bed too in myvlucid dreams a couple of times. I stopped lucid dreaming since listening to binaural beats fucked up my brain chemistry. Got Shaky hands and legs for few months now. Dont listen to binaural beats daily - lesson learned
  5. I use these ever since I turned vegan. Organic, non, gmo, no soy and vegan whole food multivitamins. Bit Pricey but worth it.
  6. Darken your room and light up some organic beeswax organic candles and then meditate.
  7. I know exactly how you feel bro.. Been on anti depressant and anti anxiety meds for 8 years and my psychiatrist won't get me off them, so I decided to wean off by myself with a one year schedule. I am half way through and even lowering the dosage makes me dizzy, tired, etc. But I know that in order to fully clean my system and use psychedelics for spiritual growth I need to get this shot out of my system. You can do it!
  8. Marijuana edibles are quite good for spiritual work.. I have had some out of body experiences after eating marijuana brownies
  9. Spirulina(more protein than beef), tofu, hemp seeds and chia seeds.
  10. I have suffered from depersonalization for 7 years now and it can be a nightmare at times. I still remember the night of April 15 2010 when I first experienced it at the peak. I got a panic attack and spent the whole night in E.R telling the doctors and nurses that I just don't exist. They thought I was insane. lol The thing with depersonalization is that it is not a disease, but a symptom of a condition in the brain. I really enjoy the depersonalization feeling when it is at its peak for me, since all your emotions are gone and it feels like you are watching a movie and everything is unreal. kinda like enlightenment. I would say not to resist it, and always remember that it would get better with time.
  11. Nofap for 6 months and going stronger than ever
  12. Collagen pills or derma roller pack
  13. Leo covered the jealousy emotion few years ago.
  14. Half cup oats, half scoop whey protein, 1 spoon chia seeds, 3 egg whites and an apple.. Lots of fibre, protein and healthy fats to start the day
  15. Super oats early in the morning Half cup steel cut oats, half scoop chocolate whey protein, 1 apple,3 egg whites and one spoon of chia seeds. healthy and yummy at the same time