TheEnigma

Is my friend being scammed?

32 posts in this topic

My friend is 55 years old. He signed up for a dating site called ChristianFilipina.com which was 700 usd a year. There's no real profiles in North America, they're all offline. So then he had to only speak with ones from the Phillippines. He sends money to real women from there. He never had to ever work for his money because his parents are very generous and left him hundreds of thousands of dollars and he still lives with them. He's had over 200 rejections from women here in North America, just in the last 10 years itself; with 0 success rate. Just one or two dates where he ran into gold diggers, he's tried every race, every religious background, and women between aged 18-80, He hasn't even been close to success, because right when the women see he's still living with mommy and daddy or that he's only a mailman, they get put off. Or the younger ones just find him plain creepy. He's even sent thousands of dollars to scammers from Georgia and Tennessee pretending to be good bible Christian girls saying they need plane tickets to travel to see him. So he's getting even more desperate now and thinking Filipinas are more loyal.

This has been ongoing for two years now. He already visited the Philippines twice to see two women he met on there, and one of them just turned him off. So basically wasted a trip and he came back to America. Now he’s still sending another woman money and she’s been chatting with him for almost 2 years. He thinks she’s genuine… And he also went to go see her in July this year. What’s the chance he’s being scammed? Both women are single mothers and they keep sending him photos of themselves trying to entice him. This week she came on strong to him and kept calling him when he didn't answer. Anyone have any insights or experiences on this?

He had already told her, no more money, next time I give you more is when I see you in person. Then when he went to see the first girl, the second girl never even met him, and then somehow she convinced him to keep sending money… now he's already gone see the second one as I said earlier in July. She’s like “comfort me!!! There’s mosquitoes here!!! I need to buy nets and insect repellent." She met him in a tourist hotel. And he says they're gaining trust for each other. But he spent many  thousands of dollars on plane tickets each trip, and never even got any commitment nor final word yet. Met each woman once. Yet he keeps sending this current one money, and she keeps enticing him. Even saying "my 14 year old son thinks you will be a great fit with me as a couple!!" " I will keep you here :)" "You are 55 but you only look 40!!" When he was over, he paid for all her groceries and met her entire family, and paid for all these women's vacations. She's 39 and he's also paid for many of her surgeries and medical expenses too because medical coverage isn't covered fully for citizens there What’s the chance he’s being scammed? And what's the chance he's getting genuine love or that this will actually work out for him?

Edited by TheEnigma

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Err. Common occurrence. 

Edited by Princess Arabia

The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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If he's just sending women he's never met or barely spent time with money overseas, what does he expect? Plus dating overseas, it has all the problems of regular dating, with more expense, less feedback, a slower pace, harder to keep it alive, and cultural or language barriers. - My experience is you've got to both really want it and work very hard to keep it going overseas.

Living with parents past a certain age is a huge turn-off for women generally speaking. Maybe drop that into the conversation later when it comes up, rather than advertise it up front. Sure you'll get people telling you its not, but it really is for romance or them seeing you in that light.

Sounds like he's trying to buy a relationship. That can last for a while if you have enough money, but there isn't much relating going on, so not much of a basis for any lasting relation-ship. Money should only come into that when it's about the two of them. Tell him not to try and save women, if you go into it with that mentality when the 'savings' done, he's either bored, or she's left.

Trust pilot reviews are usually hovering at the mid or low end of the scale when they reach a larger number, so they are either doing a good job posting fake reviews, or the company isn't a scam.

https://www.trustpilot.com/review/christianfilipina.com
https://www.sitejabber.com/reviews/christianfilipina.com
https://www.romancescams.org/filipina-dating/christian/christian-filipina-review/ - Here is two better ones to try apparently.

Not to say that you won't get scammed if you send women money, I am sure plenty of people keep several men (suckers if we are being honest), on the line paying for everything. If it's overseas it's probably ten times easier to drag it out and juggle several people at once.

My advice, split the first date price, easier to rule out a gold digger. But these days the trend is against that so *shrug*. At least don't send cash just because he can, he gives the impression he's an ATM machine.
 

Edited by BlueOak

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"He sents money to woman there"dont need to read further, any women can smell desperation on him and some will use it, so he's 100% in mindset to being scammed because he thinks money makes her turned on..


Who teaches us whats real and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live and what we'll die to defend?Who chain us? And who holds the Key that can set us free? 

It's you.

You have all the weapons you need 

Now fight.

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6 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

"He sents money to woman there"dont need to read further, any women can smell desperation on him and some will use it, so he's 100% in mindset to being scammed because he thinks money makes her turned on..

Desperation is seeking desperation. She found him like he found her. She's desperate too. They are a vibrational match. No sense in wronging one over the other. She's not using him. The energy of desperation is at play. Both are aligned with the energy of desperation. That's if we want to call it "desperation". Another word could be used in it's place.


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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@Princess Arabia The one who is initiator is the one who is creating the narrative, so he is the one who is in charge of it all,he positioned himself to be used, so in a sense it all falls in his lap, i dont believe men and woman being equal and will take full responsibility because im the one who is the leader and controling the "chess board"so im not blaming noone, she could be also desperate, she could be whatever, but if im in charge and initiator im the one to blame for my actions, since she is the one minding her own business that's how i see it...


Who teaches us whats real and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live and what we'll die to defend?Who chain us? And who holds the Key that can set us free? 

It's you.

You have all the weapons you need 

Now fight.

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Reminds me of my former bipolar father-in-law who opened a marriage agency to meet Westerners and Thai women, lol.

1 hour ago, Princess Arabia said:

Desperation is seeking desperation. She found him like he found her. She's desperate too. They are a vibrational match. No sense in wronging one over the other. She's not using him. The energy of desperation is at play. Both are aligned with the energy of desperation. That's if we want to call it "desperation". Another word could be used in it's place.

Having a woman explicitly submissive thanks to the power of money compensates for the feeling of not being able to find the same feelings of voluntary subjugation by other means.
Everyone knows that South East Asian woman hunters are often ugly and/or sociopathic old Westerners.


If you dont understand, you're not twisted enough.

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58 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Reminds me of my former bipolar father-in-law who opened a marriage agency to meet Westerners and Thai women, lol.

Having a woman explicitly submissive thanks to the power of money compensates for the feeling of not being able to find the same feelings of voluntary subjugation by other means.
Everyone knows that South East Asian woman hunters are often ugly and/or sociopathic old Westerners.

Sure and they are usually matched with their opposite sides, which is still a match. The blame game will continue until we take full responsibility for our own consciousness and step up the game to realize how we attract the things we attract in our lives.


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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16 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Desperation is seeking desperation. She found him like he found her. She's desperate too. They are a vibrational match. No sense in wronging one over the other. She's not using him. The energy of desperation is at play. Both are aligned with the energy of desperation. That's if we want to call it "desperation". Another word could be used in it's place.

Yea but how long will these energies last for? And when both parties are desperate isn't it a bad recipe for long term?

Edited by TheEnigma

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22 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

"He sents money to woman there"dont need to read further, any women can smell desperation on him and some will use it, so he's 100% in mindset to being scammed because he thinks money makes her turned on..

How long will/can this scam go on for?

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16 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Princess Arabia The one who is initiator is the one who is creating the narrative, so he is the one who is in charge of it all,he positioned himself to be used, so in a sense it all falls in his lap, i dont believe men and woman being equal and will take full responsibility because im the one who is the leader and controling the "chess board"so im not blaming noone, she could be also desperate, she could be whatever, but if im in charge and initiator im the one to blame for my actions, since she is the one minding her own business that's how i see it...

But now she's the one trying harder, and trying to be seductive and provocative. What's the chances she actually loves him? And what's the chances she actually just wants money? (He's been over to see her, and he does say she's genuinely poor. She put her coins down and said "this is all I made today" just to make him feel sorry for her.)

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1 hour ago, TheEnigma said:

How long will/can this scam go on for?

Until he changes the perception of who he is to himself,probably wont change in his lifetime, that's why i cut friends who wont grow they just drags you down with their thinking...


Who teaches us whats real and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live and what we'll die to defend?Who chain us? And who holds the Key that can set us free? 

It's you.

You have all the weapons you need 

Now fight.

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48 minutes ago, TheEnigma said:

But now she's the one trying harder, and trying to be seductive and provocative. What's the chances she actually loves him?

It sounds as if he's got absolutely nothing to offer besides money...what's there to love? If he stops sending it to her then of course she's trying harder lol.

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8 hours ago, TheEnigma said:

Yea but how long will these energies last for? And when both parties are desperate isn't it a bad recipe for long term?

Doesn't matter. People don't determine what turns out long-term. Life determines that. Shit is just happening.


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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On 2023-12-12 at 1:03 PM, Princess Arabia said:

Doesn't matter. People don't determine what turns out long-term. Life determines that. Shit is just happening.

I asked a friend how long the scam will go on for? And he said “until he runs out of money.” But he’s so cocky he goes “I won’t run out of money. My savings account is making me more interest. Than the amounts I’m sending her.” And then he’s tricked his own mind into believing that she loves him. So wouldn’t this work out then? Because he fooled his own mind, and then his money also won’t run out. So this will work for him then correct? Ha basically looking for a life long partner. To live out his life with him.

Edited by TheEnigma

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55 minutes ago, TheEnigma said:

I asked a friend how long the scam will go on for? And he said “until he runs out of money.” But he’s so cocky he goes “I won’t run out of money. My savings account is making me more interest. Than the amounts I’m sending her.” And then he’s tricked his own mind into believing that she loves him. So wouldn’t this work out then? Because he fooled his own mind, and then his money also won’t run out. So this will work for him then correct? Ha basically looking for a life long partner. To live out his life with him.

On 12/11/2023 at 2:04 PM, Schizophonia said:

 


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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Just now, Princess Arabia said:

 

 


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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1 hour ago, TheEnigma said:

I asked a friend how long the scam will go on for? And he said “until he runs out of money.” But he’s so cocky he goes “I won’t run out of money. My savings account is making me more interest. Than the amounts I’m sending her.” And then he’s tricked his own mind into believing that she loves him. So wouldn’t this work out then? Because he fooled his own mind, and then his money also won’t run out. So this will work for him then correct? Ha basically looking for a life long partner. To live out his life with him.

You'd be surprised why people want the things they desire on a subconscious level. Men sometimes love it when women uses them. They won't come outright and say it but secretly they like it. It makes them feel needed. Not saying it's right or wrong, just the way the mind keeps its identity going. Who are us to say what one is trying to survive as. There is no person inside these prisms, just programs. Unless we become conscious and awaken to our God power. So we don't know the programming one is running. Unless people seriously ask us for advice, it's best to let one live their lives because we are all in our own world's. No right or wrong here.

Edited by Princess Arabia

The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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Sounds like he is being taken advantage of

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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2 hours ago, Thought Art said:

Sounds like he is being taken advantage of

Don't be so quick to analyze the perceived obvious. Some people willingly put themselves in situations to be taken advantage of. It's a form of a coping mechanism. They'll search out candidates. People aren't stupid in this regard. The human mind is clever with it's survival agendas.


The "I" wants to know it's not. So, it seeks the end of itself. Hurray, there never was an "I". 

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