How to stop living in fiction ? (Leo and others advice )

[Rishabh R]

I was contemplating the question - What fantasy am I living in in life ?

.That questioning assumptions is a small deal

.That getting a relationship is a huge thing

Besides these answers some other answers came which I have written it in my diary. How can I get rid of these fictions of mine ? Is self questioning the key?

[Ajax]

1. Could you explain, how questioning assumptions. Is small?

The reason I ask is because I don't want to assume I know what you are thinking about without asking you ...

2. The saying " quality friends are golden", is correct. Relationships are very important, but so is knowing the secrets to having and improving and keeping great relationships. Don't assume you can have a good relationship without finding the secrets. 

How to change your thoughts? Look for the assumptions every time you make a mistake or see somebody make a mistake. If you keep seeing one in mistakes, you know it is not a small deal. 

Edited July 4, 2023 by Ajax

[Rishabh R]

@Ajax I was just contemplating and these conclusions came to my mind .

Questioning assumptions is small is the thinking that doing so will not improve the quality of my life - which itself is an assumption. By the way thank you @Ajax for replying.

Edited July 4, 2023 by Rishabh R

[Ajax]

The world is dualistic at least in terms of human perception. Until that is deleted from consciousness it is always in people's thoughts.  So, tell me when are you NOT assuming?

[tlowedajuicemayne]

Im not entirely sure how deep you want to go with the question 'how to stop living in fantas?' so I hope I'm not overshooting here.

 

The way out of fiction is to cut off the road to the thinking mind entirely. Koan practice is the best way to do this in my experience. 

 

[Rishabh R]

@tlowedajuicemayne ok.

[Leo Gura]

Yes, key questioning and getting to the truth of things. Awareness of truth has a curative effect. It's subtle at first but snowballs over time.

You could also make a commitment to act in alignment with truth rather than fantasy.

Edited July 4, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Rishabh R]

@Leo Gura today where I am pursuing internship in lab there was giving off treat to people due to some reason. It was junk food but since I am on the journey of trying to control my addictions such as s*x videos, eating junk food , jerking off etc. so I refused to eat it even though it was for free today. People were forcing me a little and calling me that I am doing fraud but I argued a little with them and I eat rice and usual food in the institute's mess( not outside junk food). After that I watched your actualized clips video - the cost of avoiding truth . Then after sometime people got a little stomach problem . They are digene etc. As you said in that video that you can't get away with delusion for long as it will come back to bite you. And it turned out true. Is there more ways to make the -Avoidance of Truth more practical in your life or this is it. (By the way I have watch your episode Avoidance of Truth and Assumption is the mother of all screw up - my favourite  3-4 times ?)

[Lila9]

I don't have the answer to your question but I love your handwriting, it's so beautiful.

[Yimpa]

1 hour ago, Lila9 said:

I don't have the answer to your question but I love your handwriting, it's so beautiful.

Not gonna lie, I was judging it real badly before you mentioned its beauty. I’m so glad you helped shift my perspective 

[Rishabh R]

@Lila9 many say that my handwriting is bad ?.

[Lila9]

@Yimpa @Rishabh R 

May sound cliche but beauty is in the eye of the beholder 

[Rishabh R]

@Lila9 oo yeah absolutely. Thank you .

[Yimpa]

On 7/4/2023 at 11:39 AM, Leo Gura said:

You could also make a commitment to act in alignment with truth rather than fantasy.

And, ultimately, no fantasy has any authority over you.

The imaginary character has infinite excuses for why this is not the case, of course.

I choose to not get rid of something that thinks its the shit, but it really is not. By doing so, I’m already giving it credit.

[SeaMonster]

Yes - how you act is even more important than what you consciously believe.

If you believe something that is true but don't act on that belief, knowing what's true is meaningless, pointless, useless.

[Rishabh R]

@SeaMonster yeah absolutely.

[Yimpa]

4 hours ago, SeaMonster said:

Yes - how you act is even more important than what you consciously believe.

If you believe something that is true but don't act on that belief, knowing what's true is meaningless, pointless, useless.

There are times to act and times to not act. 

[Rishabh R]

@Yimpa then I am confused.

[SeaMonster]

2 hours ago, Yimpa said:

There are times to act and times to not act. 

Sometimes "not acting" is in alignment with The Truth.  I will use the phrase "behaving in accordance with" since it captures both action and inaction if it's clearer for you.

Edited July 7, 2023 by SeaMonster

[Rishabh R]

Ok guys thank you for the advice .