Would I be ruining my life by waking up as God?

[michaelcycle00]

Say me, 22 y/o guy, by my own will, wake up to my Godhood now and to how I'm creating every situation and person that I interact with. None of them have a POV, they're just figments of my consciousness and they only ever exist when they're in my direct experience, as well as everything else.

At the same time, I decide that I don't want to die for whatever reason and instead gonna use my Godly power to manifest the life of my dreams and carry that through instead, since I don't see a point in living a life that I already know is entirely fictional, so I'd prefer to live out MY (ego) fiction instead. Now I've come down from the realization and I find myself in a mansion, some cool cars in the garage, billions in my bank account and a hottie waiting for me in the living room. At this point there is no denying that I AM God, that I am all alone, all powerful, and that this is just a very advanced simulation of my imagination. There is no bed to crawl under when I feel dread over my own existence anymore. No one else to blame either because there's no one there.

At that point, what is left to do? Have I ruined the game/dream? How am I supposed to let go of everything that I've grown up thinking I knew and that I assigned meaning to over the years? Everything is reduced to 0, nothing, nada. I don't think I can carry on with the lie, heck, not even know, but even much less after that. And that's exactly the problem.

I genuinely feel like I already know this is all fake, intuitively so. I feel to the core of my being that if I truly wanted to I could collapse the entire "Universe" right now. I could wake up right at this moment through my own will, because I already know I'm the first cause, always. Not a forum, not a psychedelic, not a meditation technique. It's ME...

And this, is just all so saddening. Having to let go of my family early on, and that at this point I have no choice in the matter because I know too much, I've seen too much. And once that happens, I think I'll just suicide and onto the next dream, a clean slate... and that is just as saddening. I feel like I've already lost them, the few people I had in my life. And I am so young too... I wasn't ready for this (could anyone be?). On one hand I can't keep on living a lie of this magnitude, I just have to know the truth to keep going. And on the other hand, I kind of don't wanna find out because once there's no more doubt, I won't be able to bear the fact and I'll kill myself. I feel like I'm in the middle of a "unstoppable force meets an immovable object" situation and it's just dragging me down like you have no idea. I don't know what to do anymore, if there even is something I could possibly do.

Edited October 11, 2022 by michaelcycle00

[Breakingthewall]

You have accepted Leo's ideas as belief. big mistake. complete delirium. those ideas are just a pointer, not the reality. what you have to do is become infinite, and then maybe those ideas can help you integrate that with everyday experience. reality is infinite. and you can't think about that, so stop thinking about stories and start deconstructing your barriers. not to form other barriers with the ideas of leo

[Leo Gura]

If anything about waking up as God is saddening, upsetting, depressing, or negative for you, then that clearly means you don't know what God or Awakening is.

I promise you that your ideas of it are not right.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Leo Gura

[michaelcycle00]

15 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

You have accepted Leo's ideas as belief. big mistake. complete delirium. those ideas are just a pointer, not the reality. what you have to do is become infinite, and then maybe those ideas can help you integrate that with everyday experience. reality is infinite. and you can't think about that, so stop thinking about stories and start deconstructing your barriers. not to form other barriers with the ideas of leo

I seriously hope you're right man. You're giving me hope with your words, and for that I thank you.

6 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

If anything about waking up as God is saddening, upsetting, depressing, or negative for you, then that clearly means you don't know what God or Awakening is.

I promise you that your ideas of it are not right.

Not trying to pass the blame on to you but a big chunk of my ideas come from your teachings, although as @Breakingthewall said, maybe I should've just taken them as a pointer.

[Leo Gura]

@michaelcycle00 My teachings told you that God is Love. So what are you sad about?

Edited October 11, 2022 by Leo Gura

[Leo Gura]

5 minutes ago, Judy2 said:

@Leo Gura  Leo, this is not entirely related to the question...but wouldn't you say that Love is in a way also very saddening or painful? i feel like it can have this flavour to it.

It has a bitter-sweet quality when you first start awakening. But when you really go deep with awakening it becomes intoxicatingly blissful.

The human forms of love are bitter-sweet. Once you access Infinite Love, that's where things get amazing. Human love will always disappoint you. Get your love straight from God, not from others, and you will not be disappointed.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Leo Gura

[Leo Gura]

8 minutes ago, Judy2 said:

@Leo Gura Why does there have to be so much fear and resistance against Love? Other than that you wanna stay finite and keep dreaming for as long as possible. It seems like a very cruel way to structure reality, and it's incredibly challenging to move through the fear towards love. Kind of masochistic and it makes me doubt the goodness of reality as a whole.(...says the ego)

Because Love is Infinite. But you have chosen to attach yourself to the finite. This necessarily results in suffering.

It's masochistic because you refuse to die.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Leo Gura

[michaelcycle00]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

@michaelcycle00 My teachings told you that God is Love. So what are you sad about?

Right but that's not all you've taught, c'mon now. The technicalities are just as important IMO. It's like if I were to gift you a Rolex watch that you've been wanting for over a decade and you're going crazy about it. But what if I told you that I actually stole it during the middle of the night and had to kill the 2 guards in turn to get it. The appreciation and excitement would die off rather quickly.

And Love is a very conflicting thing indeed, because everything is it which means you can suffer every single day of your life and have that life be seen as equal by God as the perfect life of riches, travel and good experiences with family, friends and partners is to us. So telling someone who hasn't awakened that "everything is love" is gonna do nothing but confuse them.

Edited October 11, 2022 by michaelcycle00

[axiom]

3 minutes ago, michaelcycle00 said:

So telling someone who hasn't awakened that "everything is love" is gonna do nothing but confuse them.

All the better. The self must be given nothing.

[Leo Gura]

@michaelcycle00 That's why you've been told to do things that make you love your life and enjoy the spiritual process.

Literally fall in love with life. That's the work. Rather than trying to reach some silly idea of enlightenment, start doing things you love. Spirituality is about deepening your love for reality. Watch my video: How To Fall In Love With Life

There is no such thing as "ruining the dream". True Awakening makes you fall in love with the dream. Reframe all your negative ideas about reality into positive ones.

Edited October 11, 2022 by Leo Gura

[The Mystical Man]

No one has ever ruined his life by waking up to reality. If your life is extremely out of alignment with truth, then truth can seem like a threat, and awakening can feel horrible. That's why I don't agree that the spiritual process should be delayed until you're old enough. Devote your life to truth as soon as possible. Vitam Impendere Vero.

[Thought Art]

21 minutes ago, The Mystical Man said:

No one has ever ruined his life by waking up to reality..

False. 

[The Mystical Man]

4 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

False. 

Elaborate.

[Leo Gura]

You can always ruin your life by doing it incorrectly. Hence spiritual teachers exist to tell you the traps.

[seriousman24]

The part that isn't taken seriously is removal of suffering as a form of fundamental love, not suffering itself but it's continued and infinite perfect removal, perfect removal implies that it keeps getting removed and therefore is part of what retains forms and time, this is what I've felt and thought.

One mistake is assuming that removal of suffering ends and then you're in unconscious bliss, another mistake is thinking that removal of suffering can't be pleasurable and another mistake is thinking that considering these first two truths it isn't possible to be just bliss, it is possible, but it's bliss with this particular shape in this universe, the perfect pleasure that increases in quantity and shapes itself through the removal of suffering which necessitates suffering as type of resource that you don't suffer, it just creates a shape and makes time real I don't how or why but it's definitely related to movement and speed itself(at all levels obviously) because of many bizarrely simple reasons.

You could say the masculine energy is that which is fine with and attains any quantity of pleasure regardless of the suffering because it is already removing all of it, therefore it's relationship with suffering is conscious and it's relationship with pleasure is unconscious.

The feminine force feels a bit more complicated, it's more about taking any pleasure and improving it and ignoring suffering and just shifting to types of pleasure that have the minimum suffering attached, there's more to it but right now it's what's coming out of my mind.

You can kind of see how removal of suffering and refinement of pleasure connect when you have suffering and pleasure lying around just like unconscious elements that actually can't even exist in time by themselves at least in this universe.

The natural property of the feminine like reproduction like quality of pleasure automatically increases the quantity of anything, to break it's own limits, that is when it is flowing in time, it connects to suffering by connecting to additional types of pleasure, like peanut butter connects to nutella, two pleasures clash/mix and then they need parts of it removed which is where the problem solver, suffering removal acts on the two pleasures and organizes the parts that aren't meshing so that it comes a new super pleasure, both in quantity and quality and utility and whatever absurd complexity arises, of course the feminine also as power over the masculine, it can choose induce pleasures, or in other words increase the quantity of the specific masculine energy that it needs so that it's masculine energy removes what it needs removed and of course "later on" it gets more and more complex, so with the two mixed which is what we see most of the time specially if we focus only on life it gets to the point where obviously it also removes pleasure itself, it has that jurisdiction because it is removing suffering that is entangled in that pleasure, and hence here we are the disturbed masculine and feminine that have rights over one another, one is like yeah why not just increase pleasure infinitely, then the other is like yeah but you can have all pleasure anyway if all suffering is removed, not realizing that because of time you can get to infinite types of pleasure with zero delay with zero suffering in infinite quantities, and the pleasure oriented energy not realizing that it would have infinite "speed" of pleasure, it doesn't need to be limited to itself. There is a other beyond 1 infinite pleasure, there are infinite pleasures that connects through removal of suffering.

Anyway I'm already sounding a bit crazy even for this place this was pretty cathartic as usual, I usually just type "crazy" stuff exactly of this nature but don't post, I'm feeling good today though so here I go, as long as someone understands even 5% (which they probably do) I'm satisfied.

[RyanK]

@Leo Gura been watching your Advanced God Realization video again .. I know you talk about the fact that I create myself.  Having a bit of a hard time understanding this. What I’ve awoken to is that this is simply a finite experience within INFINITY and even saying that is too much. This is INFINITY. Without a creator..and any explanation of my experience is not TRUTH. Me saying I created myself is just another thought like any other thought. What’s happening just IS. Am I not understanding this ? Would appreciate your view. Sending Love ❤️?

[Thought Art]

@The Mystical Man a lot of people fuck themselves trying to open themselves to this. So many cults, self deceptions, traps, ego etc 

[The Mystical Man]

5 hours ago, Thought Art said:

@The Mystical Man a lot of people fuck themselves trying to open themselves to this. So many cults, self deceptions, traps, ego etc 

Yeah, well, if you do it incorrectly, in which case it wouldn't be called awakening. If you do it properly, true awakening will not ruin your life. It will ruin your fantasies; it will ruin what you've called "my life", but don't worry about that. 

Edited October 11, 2022 by The Mystical Man

[vladorion]

The only thing that's ruining your life is the ego.

[The Mystical Man]

4 hours ago, vladorion said:

The only thing that's ruining your life is the ego.

Exactly. Which is why I recommend waking up from the insanities of the ego as soon as possible.

Edited October 11, 2022 by The Mystical Man