Going back to stage Orange feels like going back to Prostitution.

[Preety_India]

1 hour ago, Brittany said:

But he turned his back on that and kept working at a local bike shop probably making minimum wage

That's what I want to do. Just keep working at my regular job and not make things very complicated. I hate how families have to be so controlling and push this narrative that I have to follow their expectations or else they will cut me off from any emotional support. 

I find my heaven in spiritual growth. And I don't want to chase dollars anymore. But my family doesn't understand it. They are too controlling and narcissistic 

 

[Preety_India]

@ajai  I agree with you. 

@mandyjwyep. I'm looking into creative pursuits.

[Preety_India]

1 hour ago, Keyhole said:

And I remember you mentioning that having to follow through with their expectations has made you physically sick in the past.  I have physical illnesses from dealing with the stress of prolonged narcissistic abuse, that's a very serious sign if your body starts getting out of alignment if you're following someone else's imposed rules on you.

Girl, I know exactly how that feels that if you break it off that you feel as though you will be alone, and the codependency that parents put on you is fostered by them.  Escaping from families like this is a long and difficult process for sure, it won't happen overnight.

Very very very true. This is absolutely what's happening with me. My family is like a cult. 

And my parents have fostered codependency in me since I was a kid. Everything had to be done with their permission, evaluation, consent and approval. Everything I did needed their validation. Since I have been raised this way, it's difficult to break out of it and feel normal. Breaking up with them makes me feel unhinged or guilty or wrong. 

They are narcissists.. They are very successful but they are narcissists. I either comply or I be humiliated for doing what I want. 

Maybe some day I'll be able to break free and never look back or maybe they will realize that I don't have to be how they want me to be, in order to be a part of them 

 

[Applegarden]

11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Life Purpose Course

You know, I haven't came back to it after 37th topic, that is not because I became lazier, but I accutally started listening to my muse and actively figuring stuff out, because I kinda know what to do. I feel, obviously, I will have to come back to it. But it does work if you ask me now.

[soos_mite_ah]

I came across this tween and I thought I'd post it here since it reminded me of this thread.  I also wanted to say that I'm in a similar position of trying to integrate my orange shadow. I was planning on going into finance and I realized that this isn't what I wanted to do. The materialism and chase for status didn't compensate for the notion of working myself to the bone in an investment bank because of my green values. This has me scared to death about the future and I don't know whether I even want to take part in a system like this. Even if I don't work in finance, it's like I'm stuck and destined to be in this capitalist meat grinder, and that terrifies me. I know a couple other comments mentioned the life purpose course. I have taken it before and it was immensely helpful and I am planning on taking it again since I am a new person with new values compared to when I last took the test. 

[commie]

It feels different to me. I go to the grocery store but don't hire prostitutes.

What most people sell is technically their labor power rather than their body/mind. And of course many have the option of living off welfare or charity. But people do like hyperboles, don't they?

34 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Even if I don't work in finance, it's like I'm stuck and destined to be in this capitalist meat grinder, and that terrifies me.

Even in FIRE, you don't have to work for capitalists or a corporation. Nor to you have to work a regular job most of your life, even if you don't want to try your hand (or fail) at being self-employed.

And if it's the broader society that's the issue for you, there are alternatives as well (but I can't speak from experience about that).

[LfcCharlie4]

@commie @soos_mite_ah That tweet to me shows a number of things- 

• Young people fed up of being system slaves & doing soulless jobs 
• A misunderstanding of Capitalism, and like you said using massive hyperbole 
• The need for society to evolve into a much more human-centric form of Capitalism / Society, where $$$ aren't the only / sole focus, but actually creating impact, helping people etc is, Businesses aren't the issue, there are plenty of amazing ones doing great work, it's more how a business is run, it's missions etc, and excess stage Orange creates a lot of shit

@soos_mite_ah I was in a similar situation to you a few years ago when I was leaving school. The thing I realized is you can easily create a business / career that is conscious, and that doesn't simply mean being a Spiritual Teacher, it could be anything. For example, you could work in finance, but work for a finance company that is dealing with innovative companies & progressive businesses, for example, I invest in a fund that literally does just that, they invest in the future essentially, in companies that are creating outstanding work. 

You could take this example, to the majority of industries out there, not all companies are toxic stage orange ones, and we need more people like you, like people on this forum, working / starting great businesses that are conscious and go beyond earning $$ alone. 

Remember, money is simply an energy, and believe me, it's better to master that energy, then be a slave to it, plus you can then use money for good, and to create financial freedom for yourself. 

@Preety_India 1) sorry for hijacking the thread to respond to that tweet! 

2) I'm really sorry to hear about your family, and how they are imposing their beliefs onto you. 

Have you ever done an Enneagram test? You sound like you could be a Type 9, 'The Peacemaker' who craves peace & the simple life, Ramana Maharshi & Eckhart Tolle's are both 9s. That's the thing we often miss with awakening work, is understanding our own personalities and how that effects life post awakening & during consciousness work, there is no 'one size fits all' approach as we all have unique personalities and interests, and that's what makes life so beautiful.

I would 2nd what a lot of people have said on here about the LP course, building the skills to create your own income etc, as this will help you find a job in line with your spiritual growth, and as I said above that could be anything, doesn't necessarily have to be 'Spiritual' on the surface, but, more how you perform your job & interact with the community & customers. 

Also, I know you have little interest in doing so right now, but you can still earn a lot of money from more spiritually evolved jobs, I mean Eckhart Tolle is worth like $70 Million these days I think lol, but of course if you have no interest in that side of life, that's fine too, each to their own  

I really hope you manage to resolve this situation, and I hope you find a career / business / job that really peaks your interest and that you love to do!

[aurum]

On 10/23/2020 at 11:39 PM, Preety_India said:

I want a chill happy hippie spiritual life with a decent job and not this constant forever clout chasing where you always have to keep with others and maintain an image of success and sacrifice all personal and deep happiness or joy in lieu of it.

So what is stopping you?

I'm in a similar situation as you, looking to join an ecovillage. Why do you feel you have to go back?