IMPOSSIBLE to manifest Emotions / Healing

[Mirko]

Hi!

So far I came to conclusions that the people who are saying you can manifest anything - they are lying.

I don't want to manifest things. I have everything - I have beautiful girlfriend, I do not have to work for the rest of my life, I own an apartment...

So I want to manifest being happy, feeling love for life or healing my disorders... After 5 years of meditations / consciousness work / psychedelics I came to conclusions that law of attraction works only for things / situations, but not for Emotions, Healing Illnesses, "magic", weather, politics etc...

So, why am I not able to manifest:

- healing my Schizoid disorder

- healing my Social anxiety / avoidant personality disorder

- healing my Stuttering disorder

- healing my Psychological erectile dysfunction

- healing my meaningless outlook on life

- finding my core wound OR trauma wounds

- having acceptance

- having ability to feel love in everyday life, not just in psychedelic trip

- having less thoughts

- healing my physical hormonal illness

 

OF COURSE I became God 150 times (5-Meo, LSD, DMT, DPT, Psilocybin, 2C-B just to name a few)

But that omnipotence did not stick... All these trip were meaningless. And having intention before trip is meaningless as well - it doesn't work. I have many childhood traumas that I do not exactly remember how they happened. And before many trips I set intention that I want to see situations that has caused those traumas - not even one was shown to me.

 

I am doing consciousness work 14 hours a day... I have nothing else to do... Meditation many hours a day + self inquiry + contemplation + many trips + reading + spiritual techniques + social experiments etc...

 

After all that work, the only thing that got better is somehow heightened awareness & being a little bit more in peace, but not much.

It seems to me that all those "You create your own reality" gurus are fake... The only thing you are creating and having a little bit of control is mental interpretation of stuff that is happening in your perspective... Not the actual changing / healing stuff.

I think the only way out of this is having a permanent awakening & see that everything is the way it should be & it needs no healing / change.

[Roy]

16 minutes ago, Mirko said:

The only thing you are creating and having a little bit of control is mental interpretation of stuff that is happening in your perspective

Is that not extremely valuable in and of itself? Why so insistent on manipulating physical reality itself?

[Mirko]

8 minutes ago, Roy said:

Is that not extremely valuable in and of itself? Why so insistent on manipulating physical reality itself?

Because my life is dry... I want to be able to FEEL life... Not mentally understand life...

After many psychedelic trips I finally understand that EMOTIONS are way to go ... I don't want to be stuck in the head no more.. I want to feel....   Living is feeling.... Thinking sucks.

But I have a disorder that prevents me from feeling positive emotions besides psychedelic trips.

that's why a want to to know HOW I create / invent emotions in everyday life or heal my condition...

[wwhy]

Your emotions are just a signal.

Find what makes you happy and the emotions will manifest.

[Mirko]

2 minutes ago, wwhy said:

Your emotions are just a signal.

Find what makes you happy and the emotions will manifest.

no thing / activity makes me happy... I want to be happy just by Being...  Just being happy existing... being happy as existence itself...

I know that is possible - my infinite potential is able to create healthy ordinary person's emotions in psych.trips - so I want to be able to create them SOBER just doing nothing... Or just by meditating...

Basically - I want to have unconditional happiness.... Not conditioned by things.

[wwhy]

2 minutes ago, Mirko said:

Basically - I want to have unconditional happiness.... Not conditioned by things.

Break up with your girlfriend. Donate your apartment to charity. Get a job to work for a living.

Then you'll understand happiness.

[Roy]

6 minutes ago, Mirko said:

no thing / activity makes me happy... I want to be happy just by Being...  Just being happy existing... being happy as existence itself...

Radically accept reality exactly as it is.

[JosephKnecht]

6 minutes ago, Mirko said:

Basically - I want to have unconditional happiness.... Not conditioned by things.

To want to have something means that you don't have it. If you had it, you wouldn't want it. 

You cant have unconditional happiness when you condition it on having something or achieving some state. 

[JosephKnecht]

5 minutes ago, wwhy said:

Break up with your girlfriend. Donate your apartment to charity. Get a job to work for a living.

Then you'll understand happiness.

Crying alone on the street won't make him happy. 

Realizing that he doesn't need anything but the present moment to be happy, will make him happy. 

[wwhy]

4 minutes ago, JosephKnecht said:

Crying alone on the street won't make him happy. 

Realizing that he doesn't need anything but the present moment to be happy, will make him happy. 

I said it will make him understand happiness. Part of the problem is not understanding what happiness is.

Even what you describe is not happiness. It's a good place to be, but not happiness.

"Simply, happiness is a state of contentment that is often conditional and subjected to change. On the other hand, Peace is a state of inner calm that the individual achieves which is not subjected to change."

 

Edited July 19, 2020 by wwhy

[James123]

@Mirko body is empty. 

[Member]

You can't change your life sitting on a couch. You need to get out of your comfort zone.

[Mirko]

37 minutes ago, Member said:

You can't change your life sitting on a couch. You need to get out of your comfort zone.

Oh man believe me, I have tried... Both theory and practice... Basically God is worthless piece of shit incapable to alter his creation. Only accept it.

[Member]

1 hour ago, Mirko said:

Oh man believe me, I have tried... Both theory and practice... Basically God is worthless piece of shit incapable to alter his creation. Only accept it.

Bro, go somewhere in nature and you will feel free like a bird. Humans live in cages and it's no surprise that they feel empty of life. Modern humans lost touch with nature and basically with everything that provides energy... we are basically slaves sitting on couches.

Meditation is nothing if you live your life like a typical modern slave.

Edited July 19, 2020 by Member

[smurf88]

On 7/19/2020 at 8:02 AM, Mirko said:

no thing / activity makes me happy... I want to be happy just by Being...  Just being happy existing... being happy as existence itself...

I know that is possible - my infinite potential is able to create healthy ordinary person's emotions in psych.trips - so I want to be able to create them SOBER just doing nothing... Or just by meditating...

Basically - I want to have unconditional happiness.... Not conditioned by things.

Your very desire to attain happiness may be preventing you from having it. Desire is a duality; there is the idea of a cup that needs to be filled with something. But that is only a mental construct, another object of meditation.

 

As far as your health issues, there are certainly benefits to meditation, but physical health problems often require physical solutions.

If you broke your arm, there is no amount of meditation you could do that will set it back into place.

The same goes with many neurological issues that could be caused by heavy metals, lack of sunlight, lack of omega 3s, eating fast food, no exercise, etc.

Edited August 7, 2020 by smurf88

[allislove]

@Mirko

You create your own reality. You as a God, not just the guy who has a beautiful girlfriend.
Nothing can help you except you since everything is you.
So, you can take 100 psychedelics or eat 100 kilos of chocolate – ultimately doesn't matter. Everything is a placebo, everything is you.
Though, some tools like psychedelics usually work better. The only question is do you want to know yourself?

What if you stop doing consciousness work 14 hours per day. Okay, maybe leave 1 hour of meditation in the morning. I am biased :))

What if you start just enjoying your life to the fullest.
Do not focus on trying to fix something. All is good now. Just do the smallest step towards a better feeling.
Focus on what you want. Say, I usually feel happy riding a mountain bike in the forest from the hills on a narrow path.
What do you enjoy? Do that constantly 

[Nahm]

On 7/19/2020 at 7:27 AM, Mirko said:

I have many childhood traumas that I do not exactly remember how they happened. And before many trips I set intention that I want to see situations that has caused those traumas - not even one was shown to me

It sounds like you’re deeply struggling with honesty & wrestling with your conscience. Like you’re holding on to guilt for something that was not your fault at all.  What caused them is people hating themself. Your call is to love yourself. That’s how you overcome. 

[mavelezm]

It sounds that is not your spiritual side that needs more work, but your body needs some healing:

Maybe this can help?

https://www.medicalmedium.com/thyroid-healing-medical-medium/anxiety