Dylan Page

Question for those enlightened.

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Do you all feel content, happy, satisfied, and accepting of the true nature of reality? Whenever I think about the true nature of reality, and I think how it might destroy the image I currently have of it, like how I have a belief that all livings things should work together. Sometimes I get really like, disturbed by something that could possibly be true. Something that disgusts me is living with a purely hedonistic mindset. Work pleasure sleep work pleasure sleep over and over till death. It seems so disgustingly meaningless it’s almost funny. So I guess I mean to say, when you reach the actual fundamental truth, is that sense of disgust still there? That disturbing feeling? Like truth and meaning are bad? 

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for the most part, awakening and accepting truth is merely changing the glasses we look at the world/reality through. things happen for us rather than to us which means it's not as personal as we initially thought. the reason I say for the most part is the fact that if we're alive, we still have a purpose and more work to do. once we stop learning and become obsolete, we cease to exist in the physical world. the feeling of disgust is an emotion which is coming from the physical/ material brain rather than mind. it's basically us not seeing the full equation so don't understand why whatever it is that disgusts us is necessary. we can disagree with what doesn't resonate with us but that just means we don't need to do what others do. the moment we start judging and trying to change or shape others in our imagined image we start to hit dead ends and stray further away from our true selves and ultimate purpose. 

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@AnTe When I say disgust I mean more of like a visceral fear, like an extreme panicked realization that reality could be an infinite loop of hell from which one cannot escape. Sometimes I’ll get an idea that introduces the possibility of that and it’s scary as fuck. 

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it's an infinite loop of heaven and hell at the same time because they're 2 sides of the same coin. it all depends on which we choose to focus on but either or is still only 50% true. ultimately we can't escape ourselves, only temporarily. collectively we created all of it for a reason and it'll be part of human existence till it becomes obsolete and we collectively decide to stop creating it.

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@AnTe how do you know there is a reason? How do you know sum total of all people created this reason? What is this reason?

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@Dylan Page Self-realized move between God-perspective and mind-perspective without judgement. They see reality beyond reason and meaning.

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Only the ego can be 'disgusted'. The true self remains in eternal bliss for it knows it is one with all things and all is well in divine play.


B R E A T H E

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16 hours ago, Dylan Page said:

Do you all feel content, happy, satisfied, and accepting of the true nature of reality? Whenever I think about the true nature of reality, and I think how it might destroy the image I currently have of it, like how I have a belief that all livings things should work together. Sometimes I get really like, disturbed by something that could possibly be true. Something that disgusts me is living with a purely hedonistic mindset. Work pleasure sleep work pleasure sleep over and over till death. It seems so disgustingly meaningless it’s almost funny. So I guess I mean to say, when you reach the actual fundamental truth, is that sense of disgust still there? That disturbing feeling? Like truth and meaning are bad? 

Yes, Enlightenment frees you from the primal angst. It doesn't give you anything. It simply frees you completely from everything superimposed upon YOU due to oversight and forgetting.

That's the only thing Enlightenment does. But the good news is, through any and all your conscious or unconscious motives and movements; that is really the only thing you ever long for :D

Edited by Preetom

''Not this...

Not this...

PLEASE...Not this...''

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20 hours ago, Dylan Page said:

Do you all feel content, happy, satisfied, and accepting of the true nature of reality? 

If we create a construct of meaning in which a person becomes enlightened such that that enlightenment produces abiding contentment, happiness, satisfaction and acceptance of the true nature of reality - then yes. Perhaps this state/place/destination exists. It seems like there may be some humans that have attained something that might look like this.

This construct doesn't resonate with me, since this is a destination that is not Here, in a time that is not Now. Perhaps there is some high level "enlightened state" that is permanently content, happy and satisfied. I don't know and I'm not that interested in seeking it. To me, that is limited and contracted. Those are all feelings humans seek and they are conditional. Rather than relative conditional contentment, I'm more attracted toward unconditional contentment - that is not dependent on any conditions. It is always present Here and Now. It is present when I am in a blissful state of meditation in a tranquil forest and it is present when I am feeling anxiety and fear. . . . To me, that is the deeper realization.

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Looking back, fear is amazing. When you are inside that state, you can not differentiate your fear from, hard to name but let's call rationality. I've been in that state for so many hours, years, swinging back and forth, and I was shocked how my seemingly same mind with the same information could take radically different things for truth relied on how I felt that moment. BUT when the bad times pass, you'll be able to reflect back, and see what you thought was dead true at that time, and yet it wasn't.

I think you are afraid of meaninglessness, because you are used to having meaning. If you weren't, you'd probably see it's like music, it has no meaning and DOESN'T NEED one. Do you need one :)? Meaning isn't bad, desperately needing meaning, not accepting meaningless is bad. Try to bite and accept! maybe something simpler first that you don't yet. My latest huge huge huge relief was accepting that I'm insane :DDD It loses all it's power once you don't resist it. You can not be sane and not insane. There is no object without background.


Also be aware if you defined meaning, you at the same time defined meaninglessness. Sides of the same coin. Absolute equality means either both or neither :) So in this sense reality is meaningful and meaningless at the same time. Or neither.


Honestly, I have no idea how enlightened I am, not do I care. I don't need it, but I can describe what I feel now that my honest, best knowledge and understanding what everything I ever sensed or thought seemingly supports: I am reality looking at itself.

Have you ever realized you are in a dream and got a huge relief because you knew you can't get hurt, so all your fear fades away? That can hit you in real life as well. 

I haven't felt fear or felt bad in the past week, I'm honestly starting to get disgusted by having too much good.

Immune to guilt or any self-manipulating behaviour. I know it's not caused by the outer world but me causing it to myself. Can't trick myself with projection anymore. I still got the triggers firing up for a moment, but it can not latch on, I don't even remember it a minute after.

I don't hate anyone or anything, consciously, by free choice. I know I did it in attempt to manipulate others, and also it doesn't make sense anymore. How could I hate myself? Wouldn't that be insane :D?

I noticed I can be wherever, and move my focus to my body, and notice a general nice sensation, it's like some joy fluid moving on in my body. Mild but definitely there, "physically".


I don't fear death. Death is reunion, the revesre of a split up, as the saying goes dust to dust. Love means whatever got split up wants to re-unite. We split up man-woman, and god damn how much we want to unite! So yeah now I think death is probably an awesome feeling since it's reunion. 

Just now I understand how much guilt I had for my desire for women. Now I understand, that it's just love :) 

I can look at others so deep now, knowing that we are the same, to be conscious of it is a very intimate feeling that I love to excercise now (I couldn't look into people's eyes for an instant in my past 30 years of existence)

Edited by Litaken

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