Ananta

What is a Victim Mentality?

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Online dating is like this:

Thousands of men all lacking purpose direction and totally conditioned by society, all of them unattractive , even the guys who are 10's looks wise.

If you were a woman and you had thousands of men who inadvertently expressed feminine energy and were wasting their lives sniffing around for scraps of pleasure and external fulfulment and had very little or no masculine presence (because that's what 99.9% of men's online dating profiles sub communicate) wouldn't you choose only the best looking of a bad bunch to waste some time with? 

Literally that's how it is. 

 It's been 5 DAYS AND I'VE ONLY HAD 1 MATCH.

????

 

 

 


I've changed my account password to something I don't remember. 

I do not support actualized.org anymore

 goodluck

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@DrewNows ?Good vid, thanks for posting it:)


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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Life is like poker. Everyone gets dealt a hand at the poker table, and it’s random. You can’t complain to the dealer to give you “better” cards. You gotta take a risk, put your chips in the pot, and hope for a good flop. The message is to find a way to carve out a decent life for yourself without complaining that everyone else has it better than you, or believing that other people owe you something. Accept where you are, set realistic instead of delusional goals, and enjoy it ❤️

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2 hours ago, Fede83 said:

Life is like poker. Everyone gets dealt a hand at the poker table, and it’s random. You can’t complain to the dealer to give you “better” cards. You gotta take a risk, put your chips in the pot, and hope for a good flop. The message is to find a way to carve out a decent life for yourself without complaining that everyone else has it better than you, or believing that other people owe you something. Accept where you are, set realistic instead of delusional goals, and enjoy it ❤️

Great quote, its Jordan Peterson's I think, right?


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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9 minutes ago, Anna1 said:

Great quote, its Jordan Peterson's I think, right?

Not sure yet Anna,I found it surfing and I  linked here because was pretty nice ❤️

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Just now, Fede83 said:

Not sure yet Anna,I found it surfing and I  linked here because was pretty nice ❤️

Yes, its great ?


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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One of my practices is avoiding verbal expressions of negative emotions. This does mean I repress them but rather not give expression to them. It's crucial to feel what ever you feel and to sit with it completely. Feeling them fully but not identify with whatever arises. It can be a very difficult  thing to do but when I'm able to sit with and "cook" until some inner processing provides relief or understanding - To use a metaphor. We can feel spiritual coin added to the account of our being. This process in in itself increases that capacity for sitting with difficult things which will arise in the future and not get swept away by identifying with thoughts or emotions.

Gurdjieff referred to it as "good cooking". It's not an easy thing and there is also benefit in watching oneself Failing (going over the waterfall.) The more we practice, even observing our failures, the stronger this capacity becomes.

In short, totally feel what you feel but don't give verbal expression of  negative emotion. This grows one's Being and the capacity for non-identification.   

Gurdjieff used to give newlyweds cheap dishes to through and smash against the wall as an alternative to being overtaken by word vomit. Angry word vomit causes loss of chi energy. 

Edited by Zigzag Idiot

"To have a free mind is to be a universal heretic." - A.H. Almaas

"We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

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@Anna1 Today I am the victim. And here's what I am telling y'all - Nothing in the world could replace what I've lost and no one can. The universe is eternally in my debt and it could never pay me back. 

All suffering Indeed is from attachment. But why would everything conspire to attach me to her in the first place? (Falling in love). And if I was the one who conspired, I wouldn't break my own heart. 

All paths lead towards death but I resist mine even though there isn't anything to live for. If I accept death, I will forgive, if I forgive, I will forget, and if forget, then all of it was for nothing. And none of it means anything. Life then is death itself.

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2 hours ago, Zigzag Idiot said:

In short, totally feel what you feel but don't give verbal expression of  negative emotion. This grows one's Being and the capacity for non-identification.   

Sounds good, but what if you must talk to the person your mad/hurt/upset with?

What do you personally do then?

 


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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@assx95  I know you are hurting and grieving right now from your other thread, I'm sorry. :x 


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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4 minutes ago, Anna1 said:

Sounds good, but what if you must talk to the person your mad/hurt/upset with?

What do you personally do then?

 

Good question.

The I Ching advises me to not look the other person in the eye if I have been treated unjustly because it only feeds the painbody of the other person. Also it counsels to ask in an inner way for the other persons higher self to come into the picture while you're in their presence.  In a sense, to become a placeholder for them while they are controlled by the reactivity of the ego.


"To have a free mind is to be a universal heretic." - A.H. Almaas

"We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

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@Zigzag Idiot hm, interesting


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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