Viking

i have 0 direction in life

13 posts in this topic

i am so confused regarding my life purpose.

i have a physics degree which i finished 2 months ago and in 2 months ill join the army as an engineer sorta. right now im on a break.

my problem is that i have nothing meaningful to do. i can do a lot of things, but i dont have any goal with those things, therefore i dont feel like those things are worth doing. for example, i made youtube videos, which a lot of people liked, but because i didnt see a point in doing them and didnt see myself as being a youtuber ever, i stopped making them. also i play the piano and i draw, but i never put full effort in it and i dont put a lot of time in it because i dont see a point in doing so. i can also program but i dont see a point in doing it, so i get bored when i try to start. 

what happens is that i just slide into doing things that im used to, like playing videogames and watching youtube videos.

i tried to do Leo's life purpose course but i just couldnt get my values straight. i feel like im too young to have any solid values and i dont have enough reference experiences to know what i truly value. i spent months trying to figure them out but at the end the result wasnt satisfactory.

before i used to rationalize it is so because im low at maslow's heirarchy, i have no connection with people and no close friends, so im not motivated to do that "higher" stuff like hobbies but i doubt now that this is the case, because i do have a desire to do SOMETHING but i have nothing specific that seems to be worth it, because i have no specific direction in life or life purpose.

 

all of that aside, i do have other goals which some of them are more abstract, like finding friends, gaining knowledge and wisdom, gaining emotional maturity and stuff like that, but as far as life purpose im zero.

Edited by Viking

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i hear you man. im in the same space as you and struggled with this for so long

one thing that might help is to remember is that finding focus, things you enjoy, getting clear on your values etc. are all completely possible for you. i had a long period where i didnt believe it was possible. but getting clarity on this is a really human thing. it's a product of contemplation, reading and testing. we all have values and a purpose 

one thing is, to stop trying so hard and let go. trust that it will come. by pushing and worrying so much, you might actually be pushing it away. let go, set a clear intention and take baby steps 

it will also help to sit down and listen to your heart and intuition. it's been telling you things, but you haven't been listening 

i feel  you with the no friends thing. man, working when you're so completely alone is hard. honestly maybe make some friends first.

 

some questions that may help: your answers will come, even if not immediately, eventually they will come, i promise. 

question why you even want what you want whatever it is that you're going for.

ask what do you really want?  and what do you need the most right now?

what's keeping me stuck? and how do i get over it?

Edited by d0ornokey

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23 hours ago, okulele said:

My advice: go sit in an empty room for a week. Alone. Silent. (airbnb is good for this :))

@okulele I want to do this at some point as well. Would you make notes while you do that? Or do really nothing?

I'd be scared that halfway through I'd figure it out and then later not remember as clearly.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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On 10/8/2019 at 6:48 PM, okulele said:

My advice: go sit in an empty room for a week. Alone. Silent. (airbnb is good for this :))

lol im too lazy for that i dont wana suffer

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1 hour ago, Viking said:

lol im too lazy for that i dont wana suffer

it is more like to choose between the small suffering and the great suffering than choosing between suffering and not suffering at all.

(sit in an empty room for a week is the small suffering)

 


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10 hours ago, Viking said:

lol im too lazy for that i dont wana suffer

This is exactly the attitude that will keep you in your current state for so long, that it becomes too unbearable and you will have to do something. Don't wait.


Use the Prayer Swat Team!

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@Viking  What if you had to choose between having a life purpose, and identifying as lazy? If you had to pick one and let the other go, which one would you pick?


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

i am so confused regarding my life purpose.

i have a physics degree which i finished 2 months ago and in 2 months ill join the army as an engineer sorta. right now im on a break.

Congratulations!!! For your hard work and rest well until the next journey. 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

my problem is that i have nothing meaningful to do. i can do a lot of things, but i dont have any goal with those things, therefore i dont feel like those things are worth doing. for example, i made youtube videos, which a lot of people liked, but because i didnt see a point in doing them and didnt see myself as being a youtuber ever, i stopped making them

Do you want to share a link? 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

also i play the piano and i draw, but i never put full effort in it and i dont put a lot of time in it because i dont see a point in doing so. i can also program but i dont see a point in doing it, so i get bored when i try to start. 

You are so talented and you don't find a meaning through all. What about stopping that kind of thought-train and start showing your talent to the world? Express yourself. 

If you think about it and try try to give it a meaning, it won't happen. It's a distraction. Thought thought thought, zero action. 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

what happens is that i just slide into doing things that im used to, like playing videogames and watching youtube videos.

Yeah these tasks are probably relaxing your mind for a bit, but you know these wont add up to something. Zero plus zero equals zero. 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

i tried to do Leo's life purpose course but i just couldnt get my values straight. i feel like im too young to have any solid values and i dont have enough reference experiences to know what i truly value. i spent months trying to figure them out but at the end the result wasnt satisfactory.

It's okay. 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

before i used to rationalize it is so because im low at maslow's heirarchy, i have no connection with people and no close friends, so im not motivated to do that "higher" stuff like hobbies but i doubt now that this is the case, because i do have a desire to do SOMETHING but i have nothing specific that seems to be worth it, because i have no specific direction in life or life purpose.

You don't have to have a purpose. Just do what you like doing. Draw, play th piano. Doesn't have to have a meaning. Don't you see... 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:47 PM, Viking said:

all of that aside, i do have other goals which some of them are more abstract, like finding friends, gaining knowledge and wisdom, gaining emotional maturity and stuff like that, but as far as life purpose im zero.

Do what you like first, other people come second. 

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What is your passion? What do you want to be a master of? What gets you in the zone?

Pick something. Set a goal to master that thing in 10 years.

Dont quit because you get frustrated you didnt master it in 1 week. Only do something if you enjoy the process of learning it.

 

If its playing videogames than by all means do that! In this day and age thats a viable career path. But be honest with yourself. Do you really want to do it or are you just too scared or lazy to do the other thing? But dont worry about it too much. The most important thing is that you are passionate about it.

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11 hours ago, Viking said:

@okulele @flowboy lol i dont believe i have free will

I think you believe you don't have free will. That's a difference. Stop believing that.

Edited by okulele

Use the Prayer Swat Team!

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On 10/10/2019 at 3:04 PM, Viking said:

@okulele @flowboy lol i dont believe i have free will

Stop believing period. Disbelieving is still believing. The actual truth is that you don’t know. Stop trying to hold a position so you can sit back and be a victim. You’re writing this. I don’t see a no free will excuse for that. 

If you don’t know what you want to do I suggest you read The Path of Least Resistance. Showss you how to be a creator in your own life. Probably the best self-help I’ve ever read. Helps you give you an orientation on how to get clear on what you want to create in life. Read it and take action on it.

Try psychedelics

Let go of the neurotic “need to know” and open up. 

Take actions like sitting in a room for a week and do nothing. Even if you don’t want to do it. What other choice do you have? Keep complaining and not trying anything only to end up wasting the precious time that is your life and not try anything? 

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