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Giulio Bevilacqua

Indecisivenss . Eternal Loop . How to get out of it ?

9 posts in this topic

I can not get out of this indecisivenss, it's a lot of months now . I can not take any action foward.

I'm talking about what should I do I my life.

I think the root problem is perfectionism and too many options wanting them all together without letting go.

I'm a talented musician I love playing music drums and so on. At the same time I'm so deeply in touch with practices like Tai Chi and Yoga .

Yesterday I found a course to become a Hiking Guide for nature, I would love also that , I'm quite always in the woods and mountains.

But I'm eternally stuck in this point. 

To become a musician you have to focus everything on that , no distractions.  This scares me because I fear that it would take me away from my spiritual path .

Spirituality is my first priority i"m not going to change it , it is on the top. 

When a come to a conclusion my mind immediately looks back to the other options and the cycle goes again.

This wanting of the perfect decisions is blocking everything.  Also lack of courage. 

It is frustrating now.

Have you ever gone through something similar ? Thank you very much .

 

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Everything is spiritual! One of the cores of spirituality is love, so if music is an expression of your love (Which it is!) then it is 100% spiritual to spend a lot of your time creating music. Creation in itself is always some kind of expression of love, so then, everything one creates is spiritual. The deeper you go into spirituality the more one realizes all this being wants to do is create expressions of its love. 

Edited by OctagonOctopus

The how is what you build, the why is in your heart. 

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47 minutes ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

I think the root problem is perfectionism and too many options wanting them all together without letting go.

Isn't the root problem that you think you should be 'doing' something? Aren't you 'doing' plenty already?

Or is the problem more about mastery? You wish to be a master at everything you 'do'? 

My advice is that mastery does not have a timetable and there's no end goal. You will need a lot of patience and practice on the long journey. And naturally you can master more than one thing at a time.

For example I've been programming for over 35 years, have I mastered it? Yes and no, there's plenty still to go. I've also practised playing piano for a similar length of time, and I'm nowhere near mastery, but I'm good, yet plenty still to learn.

Take it easy on yourself, don't make a decision now, just carry on doing what you love.


All stories and explanations are false.

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A Modern Master of Consciousness is someone who makes progress both in physical and metaphysical aspects.

Edited by hamedsf

"If you kick me when I'm down, you better pray I don't get up"

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Become more and more aware of your fears and challenge them. Be honest 

Then look for solutions to those fears. Be accepting of them, trusting you will figure them out. 

Basically look for a solution to all the problems you have. Sounds simple but that's what it is 

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Maybe try it first, see whether it’s really what you want. Or at least visualise it, can you see yourself enjoying the life that your choice could lead to? Also, the fear is quite natural, it’s always scary to do something that we haven’t done before. Learn first, have back up plans, do small steps and see how it goes.


I have an opinion on everything :D

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The only way out is in. You can't face fear with more thinking. Break that cycle with courage.

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Yes I can relatate to this. What helped me was to use meditation practices to explore what was the function of the perfectionism. Turns out deep self esteem difficulties and fear linked to emotional trauma I experienced. This is heavy stuff and your experience might not be as heavy but the power of meditation blew all this out of the water and I am much more decisive, confident and focused on my goals now. 

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