What are you teaching your children?

[seeking_brilliance]

@dinone yeah, not sure what level of non-inteference he suggests....  Like no discipline or anything? 

Yes, any morals or conduct we may want to bestow upon our children is a bunch of cultural programming and seems counter-productive, but in an orange to blue (maybe a little green) world,  the programming is a necessary evil, to ensure survival, to propel the evolution of the human species. 

Although I guess you could say that when he says to let things happen naturally, perhaps he just means trust your own programming and parent your child exactly as you do.  It is all working out perfectly.  

Edited May 30, 2019 by seeking_brilliance

[Sempiternity]

On 5/28/2019 at 6:08 AM, seeking_brilliance said:

@Nahm ok i gotcha. 

Ok, let's say your kid is experiencing bullying at school. Do you :

1. Teach the kid to love the bully, and how to not be traumatized by the experience. 
2. Teach the kid to fight back and stand up for themselves. 
3. 1 and 2 combined. 

 

@seeking_brilliance  You could teach the kid that the bully is just himself interacting with himself, as he's all things, bully included. There is nothing inherently bad about that interaction. All there is is love for himself that's interacting with himself, as there's no separation or duality to what's happening. Even if he gets hit in the face, that is not inherently wrong or bad. That's his choice in how he views / perceives his reality. You can tell him that he can choose to create a reality of no conflict, despite what is happing. 

[Sempiternity]

I mean it's all perspective right? You can let the world teach the kid the default way of perceiving reality, which is the world is happening TO you. So there is pain, shame, deep suffering at being a victim of everything happing to you. Or, you can teach them that they are the creator of their reality. They choose their perceptions, their thoughts, feelings, actions, and reactions of their own reality. Teach them that they create it all. And to suffer, is to willfully create suffering. And the first view made no sense to them, and meant nothing to them that others thought 'differently' (he'd know that there is no separation or different).

What would a kid be like if this was their default? How would they show up in the world? What does a person who grows up never scarred by suffering, what would that person be like? Personally, I would like to find this out someday. 

Edited May 30, 2019 by Jed Vassallo

[Flatworld Crusades]

On 28 May 2019 at 9:23 PM, noselfnofun said:

I remember hearing sadguru say if you have kids you have to let them grown naturally without you trying to interfere. He said we can never own children you have to let them be the way they are and let nature decide what is best for them. Rupert Spira said the same thing, he said he has never once told his son about none duality simply because his son never asked him.

I think it should be taught in schools tho

I have 2 children who are grown now, and to a point a I agree with this. I think as a parent having and infinite( I wish) amount of time to talk, advise, share, love and be generous is really crucial. 

[Flatworld Crusades]

On 29 May 2019 at 0:05 AM, Inliytened1 said:

@seeking_brilliance great post.  Ill comment later..i have a 13 yr old and this is very delicate to approach.

Oh yeah, very tough age to both live through and parent.  Love to you 

[Flatworld Crusades]

On 29 May 2019 at 3:11 AM, DrewNows said:

I just created this thread and I think anyone here will find it interesting ❤️

@seeking_brilliancethanks for sparking my vision/curiosity 

On my way over ???

[seeking_brilliance]

5 hours ago, Jed Vassallo said:

I mean it's all perspective right? You can let the world teach the kid the default way of perceiving reality, which is the world is happening TO you. So there is pain, shame, deep suffering at being a victim of everything happing to you. Or, you can teach them that they are the creator of their reality. They choose their perceptions, their thoughts, feelings, actions, and reactions of their own reality. Teach them that they create it all. And to suffer, is to willfully create suffering. And the first view made no sense to them, and meant nothing to them that others thought 'differently' (he'd know that there is no separation or different).

What would a kid be like if this was their default? How would they show up in the world? What does a person who grows up never scarred by suffering, what would that person be like? Personally, I would like to find this out someday. 

This is what I was getting at, but the question is, do you teach them all that from the beginning? Does it just become a dogma, because the child doesn't have any other way of living to compare it to?  What would a person be like who was never scarred by suffering? Would they have empathy? 

[DrewNows]

8 hours ago, Flatworld Crusades said:

On my way over ???

hahaha don't trip now! (over one of your entities there  )

 

 

Edited May 30, 2019 by DrewNows

[Flatworld Crusades]

1 hour ago, DrewNows said:

hahaha don't trip now! (over one of your entities there  )

 

 

That's the best thing about entities, they are in invisible (mainly) so I can't trip over them.

[DrewNows]

5 minutes ago, Flatworld Crusades said:

That's the best thing about entities, they are in invisible (mainly) so I can't trip over them.

your entities are you, so does that mean you're invisible too? (i hope you don't feel invisible) 

 

[Flatworld Crusades]

@DrewNows I don't even know how to contemplate that. I don't feel invisible, but yet...

[DrewNows]

@Flatworld Crusades your profile pic says otherwise 

[Flatworld Crusades]

@DrewNows that I'm superimposed and blurry ?

[DrewNows]

5 minutes ago, Flatworld Crusades said:

@DrewNows that I'm superimposed and blurry ?

An invisible woman would be as such

i rest my case ?

[Flatworld Crusades]

@seeking_brilliance sorry for hijacking your very good topic

 

2 minutes ago, DrewNows said:

An invisible woman would be as such

i rest my case ?

Hmm you may be on to something.

[Sempiternity]

13 hours ago, seeking_brilliance said:

This is what I was getting at, but the question is, do you teach them all that from the beginning? Does it just become a dogma, because the child doesn't have any other way of living to compare it to?  What would a person be like who was never scarred by suffering? Would they have empathy? 

Suffering creates walls to protect one's self. I would imagine someone who never experienced suffering would have no walls and be the purest form of love. You ever notice how much love children are before the world consumes them?  And empathy is understanding another person. Which is a dualistic paradigm. A Nonduality child could operate from 'self love'. As every person is them, they would only be loving themselves. To hurt someone else, is to hurt yourself, so why do that. Greed, selfishness, stealing, cheating, violence, angry, envy, jealousy, vindictiveness, bullying, are all based in a dualistic view of the world. Everyone is against you, so you're against everyone. But a child that is truly one with everything, would be nothing but love no matter the circumstances. And yes, I would teach them this from the beginning. Why have to deprogram them later. Children absorb what is around them. No child is born with hate, it is taught. So this begins with the parents. They have to be Nondual, for the child to pick up on it from the earliest of age. To try and teach these teaching, without the parents being there, then yes it would probably just come off as a belief system. The child could think "well, why should I do this if Daddy is angry all the time, so it obviously doesn't work for him. So why should I believe it would work for me?". 

[mandyjw]

I've just been going with the flow. In the past year my six year old son started asking questions about magic, if it's real or not, about dragons, and lots of questions about God and what God can or can't do. He's a bit behind developmentally because he has mild autism. I try to explain infinity and nonduality as best as I can. The other tricky thing is that I know that most of his friends and teachers are going to have a very dualistic idea of God. So far we haven't had any funny situations come up. 

The most important thing to me is to teach them to love other people and be kind, and I let them be who they are within reason. Raising them when they are babies and toddlers is extremely difficult because it's so intuitive and what's required from you isn't great theory like Leo's video which is for parenting older kids. What's required is your presence. Just being ok during the tantrums and not losing your cool too can be incredibly difficult and exhausting. 

We have kids because we think we will be great parents, but in reality you feel like you're winging it and just getting by, and we all will mess up our kids somehow no matter how enlightened you are. It's a humbling and beautiful experience. 

Edited May 31, 2019 by mandyjw

[Nahm]

Earlier when my seven year old daughter walked out of the bathroom, my wife said “did you drop the kids off at the pool?”.  She answered “Ya. But they all died”. 

[mandyjw]

@Nahm That took me a while. 

[seeking_brilliance]

1 hour ago, mandyjw said:

@Nahm That took me a while. 

I don't get it ?‍♂️